Why do people insist on giving stupid advice.

This is a gaming site, I get it. It isn't an advise column and the majority of the readers are teenagers or adults with the maturity of a five year old. I get it.

Yes that was insulting, but also it's true.

I've been reading a lot of advice threads recently with people who have really serious problems, assuming they're telling the truth, but you know what, that last part doesn't matter.

If you have nothing mature to say to someone who is considering suicide, has a problem with a stalker, or maybe even is a stalker and wants to change, you better keep your goddamn mouth shut, because you are in danger of ruining a real person's life or pushing them over the edge. The fact they might be lying is completely beside the point.

Telling people who are victims of a crime that a second crime is ok is not good advise. Telling someone who is being blackmailed to lie to the authorities and over exagerrate the situation is not ok. If you lie about one thing, everything is questioned and more often than not, that scumbag is going to get away with it.

Telling someone who is thinking of killing themselves that life sometimes just doesn't get better is not helping. You';re confirming their insecurities and may as well be noosing them your selves.

Grow up people. Think about what you're saying and the consequences of your "Best joke ever." That joke may just ruin that person's life.

Capcha : weakest link.

Think about what I've said.

Very well then, I don't check this section too often but I believe it's against the rules to give the kind of advice you have mentioned, I believe that if you report these people to the moderators or ask them about that (Try here), it should be possible to weed out some of these people that are giving advice that is wrong, or are just plain mocking the person.

The damage is already done is more the point though. It shouldn't be given in the first place. You're right though, I will be reporting people from now on.

I've been bothered by this trend, too. I think it stems from the emotional disconnect that comes from seeing a (more or less) anonymous collection of words combined with an urge not to allow someone to get away with attention-seeking, or an urge to crack a dark joke. I would be more accepting of the latter motivation if the jokes were ever funny or at least came with a disclaimer. Or maybe sometimes it's not having good advice and still wanting to help, whether or not it's acknowledged that the advice is shit.

Beldaros:
The damage is already done is more the point though. It shouldn't be given in the first place. You're right though, I will be reporting people from now on.

I don't think you can really report people for giving what you believe to be bad advice. I'm pretty sure it isn't breaking any rules here. All you're going to do is put yourself on a pedestal and alienate yourself from everybody. Feel free to disagree with people's advice, and give your own opinion, but becoming a sort of "Advice Police" isn't going to help any.

MasochisticAvenger:

Beldaros:
The damage is already done is more the point though. It shouldn't be given in the first place. You're right though, I will be reporting people from now on.

I don't think you can really report people for giving what you believe to be bad advice. I'm pretty sure it isn't breaking any rules here. All you're going to do is put yourself on a pedestal and alienate yourself from everybody. Feel free to disagree with people's advice, and give your own opinion, but becoming a sort of "Advice Police" isn't going to help any.

Telling a girl who is being blackmailed to claim rape or that she was underage isn't bad advice, it's telling her to commit a crime.

This place already has advice police, I do not envy that job any, I can assure you of that.

I have no beef with people who are giving bad advice because they don't know better. A message that says, actually "sometimes life doesn't get any better" is not advice, it's poking the suicidal closer to the edge.

"My tv's broke." "play around with the wires until it comes back on..." That isn't my opinion that it's bad advice, that is just dangerous.

People intentionally saying something that can cause harm or trouble for somebody else needs to think long and hard about the consequences of their actions. To you it's writing on a page of somebody who is "probably" faking to get attention. To that person they are at a low point and going to listen to the negatives and ignore every single piece of good advice, that's how depression works.

To be honest I think it's just something you should learn to accept on the internet. Depending on the problem I don't always have an issue with it, for instance, this post:


is brilliant and probably cheered the poor guy up a bit when he read it, despite being stupid advice.

TheRightToArmBears:
To be honest I think it's just something you should learn to accept on the internet. Depending on the problem I don't always have an issue with it, for instance, this post:


is brilliant and probably cheered the poor guy up a bit when he read it, despite being stupid advice.

Okay, that post is pretty awesome, but I don't think it's what the OP is talking about, since this piece of advice is so absurd that it's (practically) impossible to follow anyway, and therefore an obvious joke. However, when you tell someone who's dealing with severe depression to commit suicide, that's just plain cruel, and probably the kind of behavior the OP was addressing.

Fat_Hippo:

TheRightToArmBears:
To be honest I think it's just something you should learn to accept on the internet. Depending on the problem I don't always have an issue with it, for instance, this post:


is brilliant and probably cheered the poor guy up a bit when he read it, despite being stupid advice.

Okay, that post is pretty awesome, but I don't think it's what the OP is talking about, since this piece of advice is so absurd that it's (practically) impossible to follow anyway, and therefore an obvious joke. However, when you tell someone who's dealing with severe depression to commit suicide, that's just plain cruel, and probably the kind of behavior the OP was addressing.

I don't think the post in question was telling the guy to commit suicide, just that things aren't going to magically get better without a bit of effort on his part. Is it harsh advice? Yes. Is it something the poster needed to hear? I believe so.

TheRightToArmBears:
snip

This is not the kind of thing I'm talking about.

I'm talking about things that tell people to touch a live wire or something else that is just stupid and likely to cause harm, despite the fact you meant it as a joke SOMEBODY MIGHT DO IT.

This is the internet. People do stupid things. Other people rant about stupid things. Trying to tell idiots to grow up is like trying to sweep the desert. You can't do it. You just have to report the idiots and hope that those in serious need of advice realise that they are just as likely to get malicious or stupid responses as well meant, serious ones.

"Keyboard couage" can make people act like absolute boneheads. Somehow the ability to be the biggest horses arse to another person is magnified by the annonymity of the Internet. The sad fact is that no matter how often we see each others post, for the most part we don't REALLY know each other. We use codenames to describe ourselves. I don't go around introducing myself as "Dragonclaw", to my real life freinds I'm Derek. But it's easier to be a douchbag to "generic poster $543965" because it doesn't feel like it's an actual person when someone wants to be cruel or just thinks they are being funny.

I try to assume that the problems here ARE real and maybe often some decent advice. but I do see where the OP is coming from.

You know how the saying goes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I made it a personal policy to not even offer much "advice" on the threads I post on in this section of the forum, more like "insight" if I have a similar experience to share.

Beldaros:

MasochisticAvenger:
The damage is already done is more the point though. It shouldn't be given in the first place. You're right though, I will be reporting people from now on.

I have no beef with people who are giving bad advice because they don't know better. A message that says, actually "sometimes life doesn't get any better" is not advice, it's poking the suicidal closer to the edge.

If you're talking about this post:


I think you may be taking it out of context.

Otherwise I agree with you, people on here do give a lot of stupid advice.

Fat_Hippo:
since this piece of advice is so absurd that it's (practically) impossible to follow anyway,

Yet it made me want to get an Orangutan.

Or watch Any Which Way but Loose..... whichever is easiest.

Beldaros:

Telling someone who is thinking of killing themselves that life sometimes just doesn't get better is not helping. You';re confirming their insecurities and may as well be noosing them your selves.

So telling THE TRUTH is bad advice now? Yes many people go way too far trolling advices, but most of the time everyone including the OP can clearly see it and ignore it. And as already pointed out, cheerypicking sentences out of context is bad and better left for me to do.

Strazdas:

Beldaros:

Telling someone who is thinking of killing themselves that life sometimes just doesn't get better is not helping. You';re confirming their insecurities and may as well be noosing them your selves.

So telling THE TRUTH is bad advice now? Yes many people go way too far trolling advices, but most of the time everyone including the OP can clearly see it and ignore it. And as already pointed out, cheerypicking sentences out of context is bad and better left for me to do.

To someone who is thinking of killing themselves... yes, yes it is.

Someone who is depressed will not ignore the negative advice, they're more likely to ignore the good advice. I speak from experience.

Spartan1362:
[quote="Beldaros" post="538.379290.14865783"]

If you're talking about this post:
[spoiler][quote="Mick Golden Blood" post="538.379202.14859999"][quote="Eclpsedragon"

No I'm not talking about that post, the sentence life doesn't get any better was on a different site, it was just relevant.

People in forum's give dangerous advice, it's scary. That's what this is about.

Basically, I HOPE the people who post for help in a forum are attention grabbers.

Just today I was reading one of those "I want it all to end" threads, and I really wanted to give some good advice. After about seven or so total rewrites, I figured I'm not exactly qualified to give advice. Sure, I can speak from experience when it comes to bullying, but so can half or more of the boards anyways.

In the end I decided not to post at all. All of my advice came from my personal life, and it's a bit too personal to possibly help anyone else. The choices in my life worked with my mindset, but they might do more harm than good if applied to another person.

I actually do this a lot, doing constant rewrites before choosing to not post at all. I'm surprised I ever post at all.

Lighten up, it's an advice forum, sure, but people can give any advice they like.

When a guy was asking how to ask out a girl, I told him to kidnap the girls family and have her date him to ensure their safe return. The guy said it was funny, It wasn't real advice but people got a chuckle out of it, no one was hurt.

Don't go reporting people, if there is a post you don't like, ignore and move on.

TizzytheTormentor:
Lighten up, it's an advice forum, sure, but people can give any advice they like.

When a guy was asking how to ask out a girl, I told him to kidnap the girls family and have her date him to ensure their safe return. The guy said it was funny, It wasn't real advice but people got a chuckle out of it, no one was hurt.

Don't go reporting people, if there is a post you don't like, ignore and move on.

On the contrary, if you don't like a post because you think it crossed the line, you should report it. Reporting someone doesn't do anything unless a moderator decides what they did was wrong and then they get punished accordingly. The report button is there for a reason, to keep things semi-organized and not chaos

 

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