Calling all fathers! It looks like I'm going to be one.

So, 3 days ago I came home from work to my wife telling me that she's definitely pregnant, test taken and all. We have a doctor's appointment set up to get on pre-natal vitamins and make sure everything's cool.

I know most people on this site are a bit too young to have perspective on this journey, but I know that there's a few fathers and any input from younger people is of course welcome. Basically, is there anything that's not worth freaking out about? What's a good way to prepare and be totally ready for when you take them home? I'm pretty much still in shock and felt it was right to let it out and tell some good people to hopefully get some perspective and solid tips.

Congratulations!
I'm not a dad myself, but my little sister and brother are sort of substitute children whenever I see them, so get ready for no sleep and no free time, no matter what age they are.

hazabaza1:
Congratulations!
I'm not a dad myself, but my little sister and brother are sort of substitute children whenever I see them, so get ready for no sleep and no free time, no matter what age they are.

Thank you. Yeah, I'm certainly planning on cutting the videogame possibilities by a large amount. I was a day away from buying 2 copies of Guild Wars 2 for me and the wife, which could work over the 9 months I suppose, but after that MMO dedication is certainly not happening. I'm thinking of training myself for getting up at 6 A.M. or so...ugh. I work 10-7 so that's gonna be tough. But it is exciting!

DrunkOnEstus:
So, 3 days ago I came home from work to my wife telling me that she's definitely pregnant, test taken and all. We have a doctor's appointment set up to get on pre-natal vitamins and make sure everything's cool.

I know most people on this site are a bit too young to have perspective on this journey, but I know that there's a few fathers and any input from younger people is of course welcome. Basically, is there anything that's not worth freaking out about? What's a good way to prepare and be totally ready for when you take them home? I'm pretty much still in shock and felt it was right to let it out and tell some good people to hopefully get some perspective and solid tips.

Well, there are going to be a lot of scary moments... and honestly, no matter what anyone tells you, you won't be prepared.

I'd say that mostly, it's important that you baby-proof the house, no loose wires no sharp objects, no poisonous rainbow bottles within reach.

Most parents seem to worry about the little things, like how to hold a baby... I would suggest not worrying about that kind of thing so much, but if you have friends that have small children, ask if you can spend some time with them and the children, and see if you can learn by doing... a lot of parents are surprisingly open about this kind of thing.

Mainly, your wife is going to freak out if she sees you freaking out and she's probably going through the same emotions anyway, so make sure you sit down and talk about everything you feel you need to prepare for, change etc. calmly and often. Good communication between parents is essential I think.

I just want to say... I'm not a parent, I was for a very short period of time when i was 11 years old... but I'm not. I did do all the preparation leading up to birth though, I have studied health and social care, and looked after my younger cousins and friends children all my life.

What ever you're scared of, talk it out with your wife. Speak to your parents if you're on good terms with them and your in-laws. Start watching tv shows about children, and childbearing/raising and reading books if you can afford them, if not go to the library.

Make time to learn this stuff and be as prepared as you can be. Learning basic first aid might be useful too. Stay calm around your wife though, I only freaked out once when I was awaiting fatherhood, and I will always remember what that did to my partner, and it will never happen again. Freaking out is contagious, so try to always remain calm.

Also, get ready for some difficult to meet demands and some days where you feel like you aren't worth shit from your wife... Don't begrudge her for it, it's normal. Read up about the affects of pregnancy on a woman if you can as well.

Also, if I haven't said it already,

Congratulations!

Capcha: nose bleed

Beldaros:
Helpful Snip

Thanks so very much for the insight. To be honest I'm new to the whole thing, I've never babysat or had to take care of anyone else's child, so I've been hitting the books on the fundamentals. I've already picked up a crib and other things I know I'll need as well, and I've been cutting back towards quitting smoking (I don't want them seeing me do anything I don't want them doing). I haven't talked to my siblings or mother in several years, and this might be the perfect opportunity to break the ice and to see if they have any advice/help. Thanks again for taking the time to offer some tips and for the congratulations.

 

Reply to Thread

This thread is locked