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Pappytech	1646 POSTED: 22 Dec 2011 21:52
	>Chas: Your CYBORG EYE BLASTS apparently have the ability to freeze someone in stasis. Your assailant, whoever he is, is currently frozen in time and space. Because magic science, shut up. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Rich: You have more than enough funds to purchase all of that! You get a new MAP, the COGS, and both CHORALE OF CHEER and STRETTO BURST! Yay! Using the MAP, you are able to determine the path to the Third Gate. It'll take about 15 minutes to reach via JETPACK. After flying around for a bit, you and Quickdraw land in front of the Gate, which is guarded by a lone GICLOPS. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Future Dirk: Show Spritelog ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Dirk: Show Talklog CS walks off, presumably toward the HANGER. Meanwhile, you're able to spot the stairs he pointed out pretty easily; they are open and unguarded. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Greg: As you begin to concentrate, you feel your shoes, whatever space-thing they're called, start to glow. (Yes, you feel them glow. Because magic.) Your body is enveloped in that familiar green light, and you find yourself standing in front of the RETURN NODE, without any lingering exhaustion or anything! It's pretty great.

WafflesandBacon	1647 POSTED: 22 Dec 2011 23:23
	>Xavier: Deliver the final blow You give ROUND-TRIP, OVERNIGHT STAB to the beast's head.

MetroidNut	1648 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 02:13
	>Rich: Carefully plan daring assault. Your plan is simple: find out what these FRAYMOTIFS do, continue using them if they're useful, and shoot him to death if they aren't. Also, you tell Sheriff Quickdraw to use his JETPACK and shoot the GICLOPS from a distance. You make sure he knows not to get too close. You think you're ready. >Rich: STRETTO BURST

Nitemare18	1649 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 02:24
	>Greg:Feel like you could punch a bear! Sure,you feel great,but thats a bit excessive don't you think? You do however hop through the Return Node. When you find yourself back in the SALAMANDER'S Outpost,assuming it isn't under attack or anything,you hop through the Third gate. Time to get back to ADVENTURE! And planning.Can't forget the planning.But mostly ADVENTURE!

Pappytech	1650 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 04:07
	>Xavier: Your twin blades slice through the monster's helm, tearing apart its head. A final shriek of pain erupts from your foes mouth as it collapses, utterly defeated. The beast explodes in a windfall of Grist, nearly burying you in the sweet spoils. The chamber door slides open, allowing C-Diddy to flutter into the room, eventually perching on your shoulder. Meanwhile, part of the ceiling caves open as well, revealing a brightly shining Spirograph, the Third Gate. Level up! Level 25 (Wait for it... wait for it... wait...) Courier of Slash! + 30 Boonbucks! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Rich: As you perform a STRETTO BURST, the barrel of your gun glows brightly, a white light emitting from the metal. Suddenly, fifteen spheres of light, each a few inches in diameter, burst from your weapon, each of them hurling towards the GICLOPS standing before you. Rather than simply hitting the Underling, the globes begin orbiting the beast, trapping it in place. When it reaches out to touch one of the quickly moving projectiles, the GICLOPS roars in pain, quickly retracting its hand. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Greg: Oh yeah. Time for some adventuring. It's gonna be good. You leap through the Third Gate, and find yourself landing on top of someone else's house. Someone's house which recently had a large hole blown into the wall, and whose bedroom is full of PICTURES OF BIRDS and a fairly expensive SOUND SYSTEM. Looking outside, you see a Land covered by a perpetual twilight, one who's surface is made of naught but flows of glass, with spurts of flame bursting from the ground here and there. You think you hear music echoing from somewhere inside the house.

CJ1145	1651 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 04:14
	>Dirk: Go up to stairs You head up the staircase, off in search of Jack. >Future Dirk: Get stuff done You head in the direction of Chas' land. This oughta be good...

MetroidNut	1652 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 04:43
	>Rich: Be pleased. Looks like you've got the OGRE...right where you want him. http://mirrors.rit.edu/instantCSI/ >Rich: CHORALE OF CHEER

Nitemare18	1653 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 05:10
	>Greg:Invade this shizbot Ok,you are starting to wonder about these commands..... Anyway,you decide not to invade but slowly climb down.And by climb down you mean use your awesome 5TH DIMENSIONAL FOOTWEAR to get down. A quick surge and a tingling feeling you are on the ground. You enter the HOUSE through the conventionally placed LARGE HOLE in the wall. You call out and ask if anyone is home while making your way to what you think is the location of the music playing.

WafflesandBacon	1654 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 14:11
	>Xavier: Revel in your new title Its...GLOUROUS. >Xavier: Reunite with your partner You two embrace with such unmitigated magnitude it is felt around the Incisphere. ...You think. >Xavier: Fly up to the Gate PCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Pappytech	1655 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 18:16
	>Dirk: You head up a massive flight of stairs, climbing upwards for what feels like hours (Stairs. Warned you. You know the drill.) Your endless ascent finally comes to an end, however, as you emerge on the Palace roof, with a large part of the dark city spread out below you. It's actually a pretty nice view. Bad lighting, but a nice view. You spot a lone Dersite standing on the edge of the roof, his shoulders hunched and hands tucked into his pockets. You can hear him muttering something about huge bitches and incompetent lackeys. The Regent is a formidable foe. Do not underestimate him. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Future Dirk: Given your knowledge of the various Lands, it's not too difficult to make your way to Connor's Third Gate. Upon entering, you find yourself landing on Chas' house, where some fairly crazy shenanigans are occurring. Chas is apparently in a large amount of pain, and Connor appears to be stuck in some weird time-space freeze ray thing. Yeah, that's pretty weird, even for this game. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Rich: ...That didn't even make sense. You didn't make a pun or anything. Anyway. Music Time You suddenly feel really, REALLY, great. Seriously. Things are so freaking awesome right now. You've got some awesome equipment, your CROCODILE buddy is doing good, you're about to tear this GICLOPS a new one... Yeah, today's just awesome. You love being alive. You eat a weird bug, and don't even care. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Greg: You explore the house, heading down to the lower level. As you do so, the music increases in volume; you can distinctly make out someone singing. As you head out the front door, you see a dark blue SPRITE wearing... a spandex suit? And a fancy hat and sunglasses. He appears to be holding a CRUXITE MICROPHONE, and is talking to a group of IMPS, who are armed with an array of CRUXITE INSTRUMENTS. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Xavier: You find yourself soaring through the Third Gate and landing... on top of an apartment building? Yeah, an apartment building. Huh. Anyway, it seems you're somewhere with a lot of ocean and a lot of islands. And crystals, there are crystals around there too. It feels kind of relaxing; it's a nice atmosphere. You think you can hear someone moving about downstairs, probably in one of the apartments.

Benndak	1656 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 20:24
	>Chas: Examine new stranger. You have no fucking idea what's going on, or why there are so many new people on your roof, but you do understand that you are in a LOT OF FUCKING PAIN, there is a CONSIDERABLE AMOUNT OF YOUR OWN BLOOD AND THAT'S A LITTLE CREEPY, and you REALLY WANT TO PUNCH SOMEONE. As satisfying as your apparent ability to freeze people with a powerful enough laser blast is, the new silhouette showing up has a confusing green aura around him. Your GENRE-SAVVY instinct insists that this is a friendly. >Chas: Attempt to form greeting. AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH Laying on some real ALDER CHARM there.

WafflesandBacon	1657 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 21:25
	>Xavier: Descend downstairs "Hello, anyone there? I come in peace."

Nitemare18	1658 POSTED: 23 Dec 2011 21:58
	>Greg:See dark blue Sprite in spandex suit Ok,the dark blue SPRITE you get.The spandex suit...umm..not so much. You spend a moment trying to decide whether to go say Hi or not.It looks like the SPRITE is talking with some IMPS and it would be rude to interrupt him. On the other hand,you don't have time to really wait around. So,as you slowly make your way over to the SPRITE,you call out Hello? before quickly adding I hope I'm not interrupt anything.

Benndak	1659 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 01:19
	>Chas: Ignore stranger on roof some some. What? No! Why would you do that? That might be one of your friends showing up on the roof, perhaps following the strange enemy you just fr - OH FUCKING GOD WHAT IS THAT PAIN >Pain: Be Pesterchum activating. You are tempted to not bother thinking a response until your augmentations inform you it is Letage. Show Pesterlog Wait! No! That's not what you meant! >Chas: Stop being a dick. Show Pesterlog That last line gratifies you in ways you don't feel comfortable sharing. Show Pesterlog You bring the lens of your DEAD EYE IMPLANTS down, hiding your first reaction of shame. Then you bring them back up, because your second reaction is 'wait that's pretty cool actually'. Show Pesterlog noooo Show Pesterlog You glance over to the other silhouette, taking the hint that it's FUTURE DIRK. You really should've deduced that from the hat. Show Pesterlog Suddenly a bad memory hits you like a bad memory hitting a brick wall which you then run into, splattering bad memory all over your partially-broken face. Metaphorically. Show Pesterlog You get up. There's honestly not much to it - the non-physical pain has slightly numbed, and your wounds aren't in your legs. Show Pesterlog >Chas: Turn your attention to Dirk.

CJ1145	1660 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 02:42
	>Dirk: Talk to Jack You scan him over, noting the advice of Nyarlathotep as you decide your approach. You immediately notice his similarity to one of your few NON-ANIME, NON- ACTION MOVIE heroes, Spades Slick of the Midnight Crew. You decide to open with a blend of hospitality and hostility that you think he'll appreciate. SS: Looks like you're having a bad day, Slick. That makes two of us. >Future Dirk: Talk to Chas Insert pesterlog here

Pappytech	1661 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 06:30
	>Chas and Future Dirk: Presumably you have some kind of hilarious conversation about mutilation and DEAR GOD WHY IS IT SO COLD IN KANSAS? AND WHY WON'T MY PARENTS TURN UP THE HEAT? AND WHY ARE MY HANDS FEELING NUMB? Ahem. Anyway, a conversation is presumably happening. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Xavier: As you descend downstairs, you are greeted by a pink blur. "HiNiceTaMeetYouI'mCommanderShepardOrPinkiePieAndYouReallyNeedToGetOutThereAndDoSomeAdventuring. SeriouslyYouDon'tHaveTimeForTalkingOrPlansOrBakingOrPartiesOrWhatever. GoBeatUpSomeUnderlingsOrDoSomeQuestsOrFightTheBlackKingOrDoOtherImportantStuff. YouKindOfHaveToHurryOrElseYou'reAllGoingToDie. SeveralTimes. Forever. AnywayHere'sTheFirstGateForThisLandYouShouldGoThroughItAndGoDoSomeStuff. TrustMeIt'sAReallyReallyReallyGoodIdeaToNotWaitAround. HaveFunAndDon'tDie. Oh, have some cake. Bye! You suddenly find yourself being hurled through another Gate, and landing on some kind of island in the middle of an ocean. You can spot a few other islands around yours. You appear to be holding some COCONUT UPSIDE DOWN CAKE. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Greg: The SPRITE turns around and begins talking to you, his tone irritated. "Nah, you're not interuptting anything, considering these morons can't hold a beat," he says, pointing a thumb at the sheepish IMPS behind him. The SPRITE pauses, and takes a look at you. "Hey, that's a pretty neat get-up, kid. I don't suppose you know how to play an instrument, by any chance? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Dirk: Jack Noir slowly turns to face you, his mouth fixed into an eternal scowl, a knife suddenly appearing in his clenched fist. He asks what the hell another one of you worthless runts is doing around here, and why the hell you're calling him Slick. He's Jack Noir, ruler of Derse, most feared and most ruthless being in the incenisphere.

Nitemare18	1662 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 15:39
	>Greg:Answer Sprite You smile at his compliment about your ARMOR but then shake your head I thank you for the compliment.But unfortunately I never have been good with anything like that.Though I have always wanted to try the ocarina.Or the flute. You motion to the suit that the SPRITE is wearing So,guessing by the fact that your suit seems to be made of,from what I can tell,spandex...that would make you Rich's Sprite?And this his home? OOC

CJ1145	1663 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 16:33
	>Dirk: Respond You give a little bit of a chuckle at Jack's big claims. "Nice try, Jack, but you know as well as I do that that just isn't true. Not yet, anyway. I'm here because as long as I'm stuck on this purple hellhole you call Derse, you're the only one I can trust. To an extent. And right now I need information."

WafflesandBacon	1664 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 16:37
	>Xavier: Be flummoxed as shit You don't know what the hell just happened, where the hell you are, who the hell was that pink thing was, how the hell you got here, or why the hell you have a cake. >Xavier: Haphazardly eat a piece of the cake You really don't like coconut, but its alright you guess.

MetroidNut	1665 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 20:08
	>Rich: Engage. Is this what drugs are like? You're too cheerful to care. You scream something dramatic about overthrowing tyrants and fighting for the lost, you don't really know. Then you lead Sheriff Quickdraw into glorious battle, opening with a volley of GICLOPS-directed musical death-blasts!

SamuelT	1666 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 21:56
	Hey doods

Benndak	1667 POSTED: 24 Dec 2011 22:20
	>Benndak: Go OOC again. Merry Christmas, Happy Festivus, and a Joyous Twelfth Perigee's Eve. Hope you guys have a good one. Here's to another jolly year of fantastic group fanart. also, thanks for ruining my dirk/chas ho yay christmas fic, samt

Nitemare18	1668 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 00:40
	>Nitemare:Be OOC Merry Christmahoniquanzika to everyone! And awesome picture there as always Samuel. Even Heroes sometimes need to take a break,relax,and celebrate the holidays with alien friends...until someone breaks out the mistletoe :P (For some reason,I imagine my guy is reading the "Night before Christmas" out loud.)

MetroidNut	1669 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 01:19
	>MetroidNut: Improve SamT's art. Show Masterpiece

WafflesandBacon	1670 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 02:52
	>Waffles: Choose which art you like the most I can't! Sam's art personifies cheer and good will, while Metroid's art is so avant garde! In all seriousness, Happy [your celebration here], I hope it is filled with cheer and shit like that. >Wwaffles: Break out the mistletoe noww i wwait

MetroidNut	1671 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 03:29
	Consider this your first lesson in showmanship. Spoiler: Click to View

CJ1145	1672 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 03:42
	SamuelT: Hey doods Ah, the good old days... when Dirk had a natural hair color. Gotta love the holiday season, guys, Merry Christmas! But not Happy Hannukah. Not until Jon Stewart gives me back my weed whacker. I would art, but I think SamT's got that Christmas cheer wrapped up nicely.

Pappytech	1673 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 04:41
	Well, looks like I'm a little late to the festivities. I blame my family, as usual. Anyway, I wish you all happy holidays, and hope that everyone gets some sweet loot or something. I don't know, whatever floats your boat. "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." Luke 2:14. >Everyone: Suddenly get bonked on the head by boxes wrapped in brightly colored paper, perhaps with a bow on top. More junk falling from the sky, huh? Whatever, free stuff! Judging by the size/weight of the boxes, you assume that they contain whatever you want most, assuming whatever you want is a physical object, and not some kind of bullshit concept, like peace, or true love, or other crap like that. Nah, it's time to get all materialistic.

WafflesandBacon	1674 POSTED: 25 Dec 2011 14:02
	>BONK In the midst of cake[1] eating and wonderment, you get bonk'd on the head with flying colourful box. Ow. >Xavier: Open the box with reckless abandon ~~Its....OHMYGOD, ITS A TARDIS, YOU FLY AROUND THE INCISPHERE WITH RECKLESS ABANDON FOR ANYONE'S SAFETY, APPEAR ON THE BATTLEFIELD AND KICK THE BLACK KING IN HIS CHIMERA-ESQUE NUTSACK.~~ (This is what happens when you watch the Doctor Who marathon and get hopped up on cookies...) It looks like a game, you read the tiHOLY SHIT! PSYCHONAUTS 2! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE RELEASED IN... YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHEN IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE RELEASED! It was fabled but never confirmed! >Xavier: Revel Thank you, GodMonster! [1] Hehe, Christmas cake.

MetroidNut	1675 POSTED: 26 Dec 2011 03:42
	>Rich: Receive gift. What a pleasant surprise! You briefly interrupt your violent murdering for a spontaneous metaphysical day of merriment and celebration! >Rich: Unwrap. It appears to be... A MASTERPIECE. You don't know who this "MetroidNut" person is, but you don't have to recognize the name to recognize his genius. It would make Picasso blush; Da Vinci would hang his head in shame at the sight of it. You will cherish it eternally. >Rich: Captchalogue MASTERPIECE, resume murdering on metaphysical December 26th.

CJ1145	1676 POSTED: 27 Dec 2011 03:10
	>Dirk: Receive gift A jade-green colored PRESENT falls out of the sky... and bonks the top of your currently sleeping head. It bounces up to your BETA-SELF. >Dirk-F2: Take gift You unwrap the carefully-wrapped PRESENT and look inside to see... oh. Oh my goodness. This is something that will almost certainly become extremely plot-relevant later. But right now it will remain unseen, and you quickly CAPTCHALOGUE it before any prying TROLLIAN eyes may spot it. You are certain that you don't want them to see this just yet. >Future Dirk: Chat with Chas You view the scene before you, and can say only one eloquent phrase. Show pesterlog One TIME SHENANIGAN LATER... Show pesterlog You watch your crazy best friend leap through the nearest gate, and decide you are needed elsewhere. Where else can you go?

Benndak	1677 POSTED: 27 Dec 2011 03:46
	>Chas: Exit gate. You land, as promised, screaming your head off. The blood flow has stopped thanks to the GUSHERS, but what was on your face to begin with looks PRETTY INTIMIDATING AND ALSO FAIRLY INSANE. Your AUGMENTATIONS and LIGHT POWERS provide you will all the vision you need for a massacre - vague enemy outlines, and LASER EYES. Before you can begin to charge along the familiar road to the FIRST VILLAGE (hey, you can stop by the second village and visit Dash!) you hear something else fall out of the GATE. From what you can tell, it's a box. And from what you can feel, it's...wrapped up like a Christmas present? What the fuck is going on. Once more disregarding booby traps, you tear it open. Oh...oh dear. >Chas: What's in the box? It's a knife. And the shape seems...more familiar than you'd like it to be. Stag wood grip. Not good at all. Your finger slowly crawls up the side of the blade and hits a warm, thick liquid. You taste it. Yep, that's definitely your blood. >Chas: Apply GOUGING KN-EYE-FE to KNIFEKIND specibus. You come up with the worst pun you possibly can and do so. Just in case you're feeling particularly sadistic. Now then...where were you. >Chas: Scan for ENEMIES, murder said ENEMIES on the way to FIRST VILLAGE.

WafflesandBacon	1678 POSTED: 27 Dec 2011 14:44
	>Xavier: Feel a disturbance in the Knifekind force Someone in the fucking Incisphere better not be using a knife, you swear if you find them, you'll show them why your the COURIER OF SLASHES!

Pappytech	1679 POSTED: 27 Dec 2011 18:23
	>GM: Return to the forums! Man, did anyone else forget just how little the Doctor Who Christmas specials have to do with Christmas? Dressing a robot up as Santa doesn't really capture the holiday spirit... Anyway, I'm back. Again. Currently in the process of kicking the bitch down the stairs. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Greg: ELWOODSPRITE nods his head. "Yep, this is Rich's place. The name's Elwood Blues, and I blame Rich for this dumb suit. I take it you're one of his friends?" OOC ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Dirk: Well, if nothing else, Jack admires your moronic audacity. You need information? Odds are he's got it. Of course, this being Derse, nothing's free. But, prices can be discussed after you tell him what you want. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Dirk F-2: An item that falls outside my omniscience? Hmm, this should be interesting. Wait, no, I figured it out. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Future Dirk: Well, let's see here. Alpha-Dirk is currently the highest level player, and is napping in a deserted area of LORAL. Chas is second highest, blind, and is going on a rampage on LOSASS. Greg's in third, and is chatting with ELWOODSPRITE on LOGAF. Xavier's got fourth highest (Only one level below Greg. So close!), and is somewhere on LOSAC. Connor is technically fifth, but considering that he's currently frozen in space and time, and that he may, in fact, be dead, we're not going to really count him. And then Rich brings up the rear, and is kicking a GICLOPS' ass right in front of LOGAF's Third Gate. Yeah, I think that's everyone. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Xavier: In a word: Sweeeeeeeet. While your KNIFE-SENSES are tingling, you're not exactly sure what's causing it. Someone else might be using a knife, somewhere. It could be magical, I mean scientifical radio-waves interfering with your mind. Or, it could be that big, shadowy, monstery looking thing lurking just under the water right in front of you. On second thought, it's probably that last one. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Rich: Hold on, I'll find something good for that. Uh... Death of a GICLOPS Your foe is destroyed, bursting into piles of Grist. The path to the Third Gate is open. You just got one of the greatest pieces of art in the entire Medium, rivaled only by the likes of Highbloods in Winter. Things are going great. You also level up. Yay! Level 13 Keanu Imitator! +320,000 Boondollars. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Chas: Well, after that rather disturbing acquisition, you have all kinds of adventures while venturing towards the First Village. You probably take out enough Underlings to deserve a level-up. Level 33 (I think) Bus Boy of Stabs! +25 Boonbucks. The village seems to be doing fine. Got a bunch of GECKOS running around, doing silly stuff. A few buildings, mostly intact. A recently restocked SHOP. Yeah. Looks neat.

MetroidNut	1680 POSTED: 27 Dec 2011 18:48
	>Rich: Know Kung Fu. What? >Rich: YOUTH LEAP into the Third Gate. Don't stop you now! You're having such a good time - you've having a ball!


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