Alternian Shennanigans

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 . . . 23 NEXT
 

>Nilvik: Jump at more gunfire

Once again you find yourself surprised at the sudden roar of gunfire coming from Vandin. It seems he's firing at where the earlier gunfire came from. He doesn't really seem to be aiming that much though. He must too angry to do so.

Of course you only realize that after you once again freak at the sudden noise. Above ground is really loud and bright and full of fresh air. And it's stressing you out too much.

>Nilvik: Notice the end of Tassik's and Librus' conversation

Well Ambare seems to be out or something and Tassik's on the ground yelling. So who one? You realize you don't actually care that much. Maybe it's because you're just happy Ambare's alive or maybe it's because you're too distracted by all the commotion going on around you.

At least Horkos seems to be patching up Brigat.

>Librus: Let Gallos take Ambare. Easy enough. Granted the guy still creeps you out, but at least he cares about Ambare. You leave them be, and walk back over to Horkos tending to Brigat. You briefly register Vandin firing at the building where the shot came from, but don't really care at this point.

>Be not sure who to be mad at. Well, let's see here. It was Tassik's idiocy that set all this up. Then again, Brigat's goon was the one who fired the shot. But since Brigat took the bullet, you have a hard time blaming him.

Of course, you knew about the goons. You should have made sure they were all taken care of. But Gallos was the one who refused help, said he wanted to do it by himself.

Fuck it, you're too confused to be upset. You kind of flop back, restoring your sword to its bookmark form. Laying on your back, you look up at the sky, and examine the moons orbiting Alternia. You think you're just gonna lay here for a while. It's peaceful.

>Tealblood: Get hit by goon.

THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

The body traveled quite a distance, but it still knocked you and POCKOT back and right by the horn. Giving yourself a moment to regain your breath, you snatch the bloody horn from the ground and hold it tightly.

No matter what anyone says, you did win the duel. Meanwhile you're really just too tired from being knocked around a bunch to bother getting up, leaving you stuck here with a member of the TROLL MAFIA on top of you.

well

thi$ i$ quite the $ituation eh

> Zerset: React.

Firstly... you remember why you don't talk to Librus all that much. He's kind of a dick. I mean, what kind of bro gets so affected by a little bit of casual racism between bros? No bro of Zerset Felixi, that's for sure!

And also, what's up with everyone being such dicks to Pockot and the rest? Yeah, they're kind of scumbags, and they were kind of trying to kill Ambare, but everyone present's been trying to kill everybody else for the past hour or so, and yet this guy's the one whom associating with makes you liable to get a sword through your mouth? Pockot's cool! He's fun to talk to! He knows some really, really funny redblood jokes!

You make a note to feelings jam with Pockot and the others later. These events must have done horrendously little for their self-confidence.

Secondarily...

HOLY SHIT THE BOSS JUST TOOK A BULLET THROUGH THE CHEST OH GOD NO OH GOD WHY NO NOT LIKE THIS NO NO NO NO NO.

You hate the guy - of course you want him to die - but a heroic death? Getting in the way of a bullet to save a peasant girl's life? NO! No mafia don should leave the world like that! Brigat was supposed to be succeeded by one of his underlings, betrayed as he had betrayed many others, given the kiss of death with just the right amount of tongue... and, uh... to be honest, you kind of always hoped the one to do it would be you.

You've never known a more worthy rival than the boss. He's the greatest man you know. The biggest dick, but also the greatest, most spectacular bastard you've ever met. You can't watch him die like this.

You start to crawl.

H-hey, Doc... gimme a boos7, wou7d ya...?

You pull on the doctor's coattails and raise your arm for him to help you up.

Raimoy: Observe and react.

...
......
.........Yeah you got nothing. Like, absolutely nothing. This situation is not one you would have seen happening in a million years. Like...wow...just...okay, you start chewing over what just happened for a while, deciding to take some very minor actions. Not really much for you to do but make some very minor actions.

Raimoy: Sneaky Sneaky up to people.

You stalk up to Vandin and give him a light pap on the snout with the handle of your gun, give a disapproving scowl, then turn around and shoot calmly in the vague direction of the sniper. You miss, hitting a feet or so away from him. You then turn back to Vandin and shrug, before moving on to Librus. You sit down calmly next to him and throw your cloak down.

Hullo...
I suppose you may want to take a break before playing a big damn hero later? shit's pretty flown off everybody's collective handles.

>Pockot: Notice who you're on top of.

Yeah. Tell me about it.

You can't really focus too much, as you're still kind of IN FUCKING SHOCK THAT THE BOSS JUST TOOK A BULLET FOR THE REDBLOOD. You wonder how BULLIT'S taking it.

>Bullit: React in a calm manner

SHIT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>Legget: React

So POCKOT was right, you think to yourself as you observe from the ROOFTOP. THE BOSS was WAXIN' RED after all. You feel kind of bad that you had to put BULLIT in that position to take the shot, but you were curious. And now that you know, well, it'll be some JUICY GOSSIP to share at the RUNNERS FER HIRE POKER GAME tomorrow night.

>Brigat: Recover

FUCK NO. There's some bandages in your chest now, but that's only because there's STILL A HOLE THERE. It'll be a while, get used to it.

>Vandin: Calm down.

You cannot calm down because you are too busy FLIPPING THE FUCK OUT! Raimoy's attempts to PAP you were ineffective, because you do not pity him very much! You continue wildly firing your assault rifle at the sniper.

>Vandin: Run out of ammo.

Your rifle makes a "click" sound and stops making "bang" sounds.

You scream "DYSPROSIUM", ejecting a SPARE RIFLE CLIP from your sylladex.

Captchaloging that took you at least half an hour. You need to find a less-shitty fetch modus, you think. All signs of thinking are, however, erased as soon as your SPARE RIFLE CLIP is in place; you resume firing at the sniper.

> Zerset: Be the goddamn employee of the month.

You climb up the blueblood by his lab-coat, supporting yourself on his shoulder. The boss looks fairly healthy, given that he's just been shot through the chest. That's good.

Uh... b-boss...?

You lose your grip on the blueblood and collapse on top of Brigat. He now looks decidedly less healthy.

Welp; better get this off your chest while you have a chance to, then.

Boss... jus7 wan7ed 7a 7e7 ya know...

I ha7e you... so much... you've 7uined so many peoples' 7ives - mine included, an' as fa7 as I know, eve7yone e7se's who you've eve7 me7 - an' I jus7 7hink i7's inc7edib7e. You a7e 7he mos7 7e77ib7e, des77uc7ive 77o77 I've eve7 me7 in my en7i7e 7ife, an'... 7ha7's 7he kind a' 77o77 I wanna be some day.

You amaze me. You'7e 7he mos7 7ep7ihensible bas7a7d I've eve7 known. I7's no7 jus7 7ha7 you'7e a dick; you'7e 7ea77y, 7ea77y good at bein' a dick! You7 schemes b7ow my mind, every f7eakin' 7ime! In my whole 7ife, I cou7d never d7eam of bein' as good as you! You'7e amazing. I don'7 7hink 7he7e's anyone in 7he unive7se mo7e de7es7ab7e 7han you. No7 a sing7e 77o77.

So, uh...

I guess you cou7d conside7 7his my 7esigna7ion.

Huh.

Well, that was...

Huh.

This shall require some contemplation.

>Zerset: ABSCOND LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER.

We77, uh... guess I'77 be seein' ya a7ound 7hen, boss!

You scurry away as fast as your pathetic ankles can carry you.

>Horkos: Seriously reconsider who hang out with AGAIN
Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with these people?

>Librus: Resist urge to facepalm. You fail to do so. You wince slightly as you bring your injured hand up to your forehead. Why is everyone around you insane?

>Sit up, talk to Raimoy. Yeah, you can handle that. Kicking your legs forward, you slide yourself into a sitting position. Turning to face the jadeblood, you give your answer.

"|\Yeah, a bit of a break would be nice. Just found out that my morail's the worst kind of asshole, one of my best friends is probably traumatized and is missing a horn, I don't even know what the hell is up with all the kisemsises being made tonight, and Vandin will not STOP SHOOTING. Yeah, I'd say shit just pulled an acrobatic fucking pirouette.

But the thing that's really bugging me, is that this is kind of my fault. I knew that this shit was going to happen, I could have stopped Brigat's goon from taking that shot. But no, I decided to trust someone else to deal with it. And look what happened.

It's crazy. I have more excuse then anyone else here to be fucked up in the head, to do incredibly stupid shit. So why am I the sanest troll here? Gah... sorry for bitching, but I need to say this stuff out loud. Can't even hear myself think these days.\|"

>SPADDUS SILCKE: Be a distant onlooker

image

Goddamn troll kids. Every time you turn around they're smoochin' each other. Makes a man want to stab his own gut and puke blood.

Tirnet: Get in on this action!

You... what? Wait... no! Just.... hang on a moment. All of this just kind of... happened all these open emotions are really just weirding you out right now. Just... let's just move on with the night.

...WHEREUPON IN THE SECOND ACT THE FLARP GROUP COMES TOGETHER AFTER AN EMOTIONALLY DRAINING DUEL TO PLAY IN A GAME THAT SIMULATES THE END OF AN EPIC BATTLE AGAINST THE WIZARD WARLOCK SEPTIMUS WHICH WILL TAKE PLACE IN A GAME-BAT ALTERED VERSION OF A RUIN OF A RECENTLY VACATED BUILDING; FILLING IT UP TO THE BRIM WITH SIMULATED DANGERS SUCH AS GOBORGERS AND KOBOLINS AND AT THE VERY END A BOSS BATTLE; ON SCREEN WILL BE CERTAIN PLOT POINTS EXPLAINED LATER ON WHILE SOME MIGHT BE MISSED ALTOGETHER; END OF THE ACT WILL INVOLVE THE RETURN TO THEIR HIVES AND A REVEAL THAT WILL INSTIGATE THE ONE MAIN PLOTPOINT THE REST OF THE STORY WILL RESOLVE ON.
ALSO, WHEREIN THE AMOUNT OF ROMANCING SHALL BE REDUCED TO ZERO, AND ONLY EXISTING RELATIONSHIPS WILL BE EXPLORED AND VIOLATIONS ARE LIKELY TO INVITE THE EVENT OF BEING EATEN BY A GARUEGAMESH

Yes. Like that. That's perfect. Let's go.

NOW

>Nilvik: Notice the second round of snogging

And there goes that one other mafia troll with Brigat. You don't know if it's red or blackrom, seeing as you're not that familiar with the green blood. Either way, it's just adding to the general confusion you have right now about everything. All these emotions are coming out all at once and collecting in one big stew of- WOAH! That metaphor was getting dirty real fast. And not the dirty you like. The naughty dirty.

>Nilvik: Dig a hole

You always feel calmer while digging a hole. But you can't really do that right now. Everyone else is likely to get weirded out by that. And then someone my jump you or something. Instead you walk over to where Librus and Raimoy are sitting. They're calm guys. Well, calmer. And Librus is only calm some of the time. And Raimoy is only calm because he's always on Sopor slime.

Whatever, they aren't making out or anything, so that's better than several trolls here.

"---D so you two will be ready once were done here right? because the excitement here is getting a bit much..."

Raimoy: Feel bad for comrade

You frown slightly, not knowing what to say.For a second to you look up to the stars, but then you give a slight shrug and give silent back pap.
It's alright man, talk all ya want, I'll listen as much as I can
You realize that makes you seem like you're trying to be his moirail, and that makes you slightly embarrassed. You quickly turn your attention to Nilvik.
That depends. If I assume by ready you mean ready to lead the assault on my tower after we're done flarping, I think everybody might need a little break before hand, after all, someone could actually die here tonight. If you mean after all the matters of the duel have been cleared up, and if we're ready to flarp, I am, can't answer for him you make a slight jabbing motion with your thumb at Librus.

>Librus: Stop being the depressing troll. Not sure you can really do that; by your very nature you're almost always depressed by something. Still, that doesn't mean you have to be rude to your friends.

You answer Nilvik's question.

|\Yeah, I'm ready to FLARP whenever everyone else is. Just let me get my shirt back.\|

You walk over to Horkos and Brigat. Looks like Horkos has managed to patch the mafioso up pretty well; Brigat's probably going to survive. You pick up your blood-stained shirt, and slip it back over your head. It's kind of gross, but you can't very well FLARP without your clothes.

> Zerset: Moirail-senses: TINGLE!

Your ears prick up as you detect an un-'railled troll in need of a feelings-jam in the area. Though normally you'd be pulling on your most conciliatory underwear and rushing to their aid as fast as your hindered ankles would carry you, this time you have a troll more desperately in need of pacification: yourself.

> Zerset: Solo feelings jam.

You've never been very good at these, as the idea of a troll both placating and being placated has always seemed kind of silly to you, so sometimes you like to split yourself into a placater and a placated; one of you talks to the other and makes notes as best they can, while the second one whinges pathetically about his shitty screwed-up love/hate life.

There is a reason why you don't have solo feelings jams very often.

> Zerset: Whine like a bitch about your haaaaaaard motherfuckin' life.

Zerset facepalmed. He hated dealing with this stupid bastard more than anyone else on Alternia. Nothing he did made any sense.

That's the crux of the problem. Why didn't you want to kiss him? You hate him a helluva lot, the timing couldn't've been more perfect; so what was wrong?

And then it occurs to you. What the boss had been doing at the time.

You've always thought of him as this huge incredible bastard, looking out for no-one but himself and destroying everything in his way just for the fun of it; so why would he save the girl? Why would he risk his life to save another being? It's wierd. It's wierd and it doesn't fit. You... you aren't sure if you can hate him in the same way any more. It feels as though this bastard - this evil, incredible troll whom you've been following for all these years - just isn't the same bastard you built him up to be.

You think maybe you had better stay in this cave for a little bit. It isn't like anyone would miss you.

>Brigat: React to hatekiss

Thank Jegus you weren't CONSCIOUS for that, even I'm not sure what you would've done. Probably something involving murder. Even your own, if no other options were available. In the meantime, let's take a look at what you ARE thinking about in that muddled, unconscious HEAD of yours.

...Weren't you supposed to be some HARD-BITTEN, UNFEELING MAFIOSO?

>Vandin: Miss Zerset.

You cannot bring yourself to miss the pathetic greenblood.

All of a sudden your gun stops firing. This is because you have released the trigger.

You have spent years training your subconscious mind to recognize when you're on the last bullet of your last magazine, and stop yourself from firing when this occurs. As a result, no matter how enraged and uncontrolled the firing, afterwards you always have a single bullet left in the chamber. Just in case.

>Vandin: Calm down.

With no more ammunition (save the one shot) to fuel your violent rage, you finally calm down.

You think it's pretty fortunate than in your fury, you forgot your rifle's built-in grenade launcher was still loaded.

>Vandin: Survey the scene.

Brigat seems stable. Blackrom is in the air. Nobody died.

A good night's work.

>Gallos:Check on your moirail

You rip a piece of the sleeve of your RAINBOWMANCER'S CAPE off,making sure to get a piece that doesn't have blood on it,and hand it to Ambare.

As your moirail walks off to check on things,you stand up and walk off to her yellowblooded friend,Librus.You gently grab him by the back of the blood stained shirt and start dragging over to a secluded spot.

Once you are sure you both are in an area were no one else can here you,you breath a sigh and stare at Librus.

I don't say this often...In fact I never really say this.And I won't be repeating myself.But...You bow your head to the yellowblood.Thank you for saving Ambare's life.

>Librus: Be terrified, then confused. Bwah?

Huh. Well, you guess that Gallos is a nicer troll then you took him for. He's still terrifying as hell, make no mistake, but he's got a good side.

As you walk back over to Nilvik and Raimoy, you try your best to look appropriately scarred and traumatized; don't want to tarnish Gallos' reputation.

>Horkos: Notice your patient is unconscious
You wouldn't qualify him as a patient nor you as a doctor, but yeah, he pretty unconscious as fuck.

>Horkos: Captcha your not-a-patient
The notion strikes as foolhardy and...

>====>
Well, it might work. The complex RULES of the SYLLADEX said nothing against CAPTCHA'ING TROLLS.

>====>
You look around to see if anyone is looking...

...Your clear! On three!

>====>
1!

>====>
2!

>===>
Th-On second you're just going carry him, better EXERCISE that way (,though, the notion of TROLL CAPTCHA'ING has not left your mind). You walk over to the rest of your friends.

>Tassik: Continue to be under Pockot.

Can do.

$o im ju$t $ort of lyin here with my new trophy

how wa$ your night

>Pockot: Continue to be on Tassik

Could be better. Tried to kill some redblood. Boss took the shot. Probably getting fired.

So how long you think her moiral's gonna let you live?

>Brigat: Wake up

You very slowly ease into CONSCIOUSNESS on HORKOS' SHOULDER. By which I mean his SHOULDER digs into your CHEST WOUND and you wake and up and start CURSING AND SHRIEKING IN INTENSE PAIN.

>Tassik: Calmly respond.

eh id $ay ive got about another night left to live

he$ probably too bu$y with flarp for now

>Tassik: Suddenly get idea.

You yell at that weird ORANGEBLOOD to come over and talk to you for a second.

>Nilvik: Be called over by Tassik

It looks like Tassik wants to talk to you. Maybe it's to ask you for help getting that one troll goon off him.

Well that was alot worse than you expected. You aren't surprised he act higher than you, despite you standing above him, but his attitude still struck you as rude. The seablood rarely bothers to speak with you and Brigat, while somewhat respectful, treats you like the lowblood you are, but Tassik was just purely abusive towards you. And he isn't even a blueblood, let alone something higher.

You figure that perhaps you've had it easier than most trolls with close blood to yours though. Many are constantly harassed by highbloods. So perhaps you should just be happy to only have to deal with Tassik. And that's only when he bothers speaking with you.

>Nilvik: Looks at Ambare's horn

You look down at the horn in your hand as you walk away from Tassik. You have some hesitancy to go through with Tassik's request. It feels weird making a trophy weapon for a troll you're not particularly fond of with the horn of a close chum. Tassik's of a higher blood than you or Ambare so you can hardly just not do it for him. Maybe you shouldn't talk about it with the others.

>Nilvik: Captchalog SEVERED TROLL HORN into MODUS

You put away the horn before anyone, hopefully, knows you have it. You then walk back over to Raimoy and Librus. Those two should help you ease out. Probably.

>Librus: Talk to the Man who will Pierce the Heavens! What?

>Talk to the digger. Oh, Nilvik. Right, can do.

>Goddammit!
You knew you should of CAPTCA'ED him.

Sorrry!!!

You then your not-a-patient bridal style, that is if you knew what a bride was.

Raimoy: Stop spacing out while listening to Nilvik and Librus

oh wait what? oh right...yeah you can do that. You've kinda forgotten what team you're on. You are almost exactly in the middle of the Hemospectrum. You suppose you'll stick with the lowbloods for now since, y'know, less dicks on that side. You suppose you better tell the other two about Tassik coming along for the extermination.
eeerrrhhh...I kinda hired Tassik to come with us to my hive...you guys don't mind right?

>Gallos:Deal with tealblood

Well,now that you have spoken to Librus,it may be wise...ok more like a bit of fun...to let the idiot tealblood know what you have planned for him.

You walk from the secluded spot over to the tealblood,who still has the GOON you threw at him laying on top of him.Either that is one lazy GOON or your throw was better then you thought.

When you get there you put your hand on the tealblood's mouth,he not seeming to be in a postion to argue,and smile at him in a very murderous way.

You should consider yourself lucky teablood.Librus asked me not to kill you...and so I won't....but you will be losing an arm once this whole thing is over,which I'd like to point out that Librus had no problem with...And I'll even be a bit...merciful...I'll let you choose the arm you lose....

You glance at the GOON And don't think I have forgotten about you.Once this is over,I will make you suffer like you never have before.And to make a point,you casually break one of his fingers.

Until our next meeting...tealblood.And just remember...go after my rail again...and Librus won't be there to protect you.....

With that done you remove your hand from his mouth,ignoring his complaints,and walk off like nothing happened.

Off to see if Ambare needs any help.

>Tassik: Spit.

You've never actually tasted murder before, but that's what Gallos' hand tasted like. Ugh.

Looks like your bloodmate mafia friend here also got off on the wrong stick with the psychotic highblood. Just another thing you two have in common. Immediately you begin trying your best to hide your newfound lisp and lay on the thickest redrom you can.

Hey, wasn't Gallos going to break your arms or something? Eh, whatever.

>Librus: React in an appropriately dramatic manner to Raimoy's statement.

"|\NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!\|"

|\Well, that's going to be awkward then.\|

>Nilvik: Mind

"---D um, well... i guess he can come. though he needs to be careful in my tunnels..."

You're certainly not happy about having him with you down in the tunnels, but you figure you don't have much choice in the matter. At least you'll be on... under... in your hometurf. That should hopefully keep his nasty mouth to himself.

>Pockot: Yell at indigo

I was doing my fucking job! you shout at the asshole of a HIGHBLOOD walking off. Fucking non-BOSS HIGHBLOODS. You hate 'em all, even though you're kind of one yourself. You say goodbye to TASSIK and walk over to BRIGAT. Whether or not you screwed up you're confident he'll keep you safe from that PSYCHO.

>Brigat: Ask to be put down

You are fairly certain you can stand now. You get back on your feet and almost immediately fall over, but POCKOT is there to catch you, luckily. With your LIVING CRUTCH, you decide that the first order of business is... actually, wait, first is TELLING ALL OF THE IDIOTS AROUND YOU THAT A WORD OF WHAT HAS OCCURRED OUTSIDE OF THIS CIRCLE WILL GET THE ENTIRE TROLL MAFIA UP THEIR RESPECTIVE ASSES.

Second, you and your GOON head off to find where AMBARE went.

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 . . . 23 NEXT

Reply to Thread

This thread is locked