Alternian Shennanigans

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>Amber: Check on gamegrubs

Yup! They just about hatched, and there are several bats flapping around, waiting for the start of the game. You're just about to start this, when something wicked this way comes.

You notice that Gallos is lurking just a few feet away.

>Ambare: Start the damn game already!

You touch one of the gamebats, and they disperse through the night. One flies into you and you feel the familiar feeling of the bat attaching itself to you, displaying the vital information you need for a match. As the clouder, you quickly give all the information for a finale of a FLARP campain.

>Ambare: Head back to the duel site and give your fellow players the summary.

You head back with your moirail to the duelsite and gather the players, which proved little challenge with the help of your moirail, and get your Clouder on.

>Ambare: Put on your robe and wizard hat

>Librus: Dress up in your silly outfit. You don't have a silly outfit! Seriously, why would you dress up in stupid clothes just to play a game like this? Nah, you're just going to play in your regular clothes, bloodstained though they be. You do however, don your BATTLE-FEZ. Because that thing is awesome.

>Grab a gamebat. You do so. Your stats are proudly displayed for all to see.

>Consult with teammates. |\So, guys, which objective should we go after?\|

>Tassik: Get up.

You finally get up from your resting place, fairly rejuvenated after your small beating. Albeit still missing some bits of teeth.

You're sure they'll grow back. Probably.

You deposit a few troll-cents into your obnoxious fetch modus and retrieve your ANCESTRAL GARBS. They're pretty sweet, to be honest. You're glad you didn't get any blood on them yet. You are entirely sure anyone laying eyes on the robes of THE MURALIST would be absolutely flabbergasted.

You tighten your ANCESTRAL SASH. This thing is magnificent.

>Tassik: Get yourself one of the flying things.

You attach your gamebats, displaying your stats. Your LISP has leveled up considerably since last session. You are almost entirely sure you have the highest LISP level of any of the entire group. You are also entirely sure that this is not something to be proud of.

Cautiously, you walk forward and rejoin the group, keeping clear of the guy who wants to rip your arm off.

well im thinking we go for the power generator we dont really know what kind of $ick trap$ $eptimu$ i$ running

Gallos:Ready yourself

As your moirail explains the ins and outs of this current FLARP SESSION,you check to make sure that everything is set and ready.

You are still wearing your RAINBOWMANCER'S CAPE ,your arms poking through the long sleeves,which are just about right for your arms to reach the end.There is a patch missing out of the right arm,were you tore it for your rail.The patches of blood dotting it still there as you would never wash them off.

You put on your MURDERER'S SHADES,less because you need them to see and more to remind you of what they mean to you.And they tend to add to your "psychopath" look.Which never hurts.

Your cane weapon,the GENTLEMEN'S BEST FRIEND,is at your side as it always is.Sure,you could have replaced this thing a sweep ago..but you have never found yourself able to part with it.You still aren't sure why.

Welp,now that you are sure you are ready,only one thing left to do now.

>Gallos:Get Gamebat

You take a deep breath then attach the GAMEBAT to yourself and shiver as the usual wave of what always feels like cold water washes over you.You are still aren't quite sure why that happens.

You watch the stats display pop up before you.You nod after checking to make sure everything is right and then join your "fellow" FLARPERs as they decide what to do first.

Attacking the power generator first may be the wiser idea as it would no doubt be the first thing we run into.Of course,it could be one big giant trap..but I doubt that will be a major problem.Of course we could always use someone as bait...

You make sure to flash the tealblood a murderous tooth grin.You are so going to have fun to night.And if you can do some killing with the power of your Ancestor...all the more fun.

>Horkos: Don FLARPing helmet
10 LIFTS of your SYLLADEX DUMBBELL and a HELMET appearifies. You don it with the a gamebat, showing your stats.

>===>
Soundx great, Tathhik!!! But frist.....

>===>
You equip your RED SPECIBUS.

I MUST PLAY!!!

>Horkos: Play a song that fits the mood
Discord.

Fck.

Another discord.

FUCL!!!

>===>
There we are! You play the training theme from a favorite movie of yours SMALL-TIME BOXER GETS THREATENED BY A LOAN SHARK FOR BOONBUCKS, AND TO PAY FOR SAID DEBT, HE WILL FIGHT A HIGHBLOOD BOXER, HE WILL BE TRAINED RIGOROUSLY BY EX-BOXER AND WILL BE MATESPRITS BE A SHY FEMALE TROLL.

Flyinh higher!!!

>Tassik: Realize that asshole just called you 'tathik'.

That shit ain't gonna fly. What a motherfuckin' disgrace. A waste of blue-purple blood.

Fuck that guy, theriouthly.

>Vandin: Load your FLARPing gun.

Conveniently, your FLARPing gun is also your regular gun, and you never leave your hive without it. Not-so-conveniently, it only has one bullet left.

You switch it to the grenade launcher setting. There's no kill like overkill.

>Vandin: Reply.

>--[I mean honestly, this is the final level, so pretty much everything is going to be a trap}--

>--[Which one we start with is totally irrelevant probably}--

>--[Also I kind of ran out of bullets, so Im just going to use the grenade launcher}--

>--[So like, stand back when I shoot, I guess}--

>Tassik: React.

im really not comfortable having thi$ dip$hit a$ our de$ignated mark$man

>Brigat: Prepare for the game

Still a bit WORSE FOR WEAR after the pre-FLARP shenanigans, you grab a GAMEBAT, proudly displaying your stats, most notable of which is your STARTLINGLY LOW STRENGTH RATING. You say it's probably because of the GUNSHOT. POCKOT says it was that score last time to. You hit him with your gun and tell him to shut up. In fact, he can leave.

You SHOOSH him away and go stand by the others, trying to keep yourself BALANCED.

Get that mob generatin' thing first. The less shit we've gotta fight, the better. At least, ones that don't drop any loot.

>Librus: Attempt to come up with plan. Maybe it'd be a good idea to split the party. You could take down multiple targets at the same time, and hopefully you could avoid any blood color spats.

Wait...

Yeah, never mind.

|\I'm going to agree with Brigat on this one. Take out the little guys first, and the big ones should be a lot easier to take down. After that, taking down the power would probably be best.\|

>Vandin: Be mildly annoyed at Tassik.

What an asshole. You're pretty sure you can snipe with a grenade launcher better than he can.

>--[Yeah sure whatever, lets get the spawner I guess}--

>Tassik: Come up with brilliant plan.

look why dont we ju$t $plit the party
we can take down multiple target$ at the $ame time and avoid any blood color $pat$

>Vandin: Beat Tassik to death.

You resist the urge.

Barely.

>--[That plan is mind-bogglingly stupid}--

>--[Splitting up just makes us easier to kill}--

>Tassik: Deliver professional rebuttal.

your fuckin lu$u$ i$ $tupid

$plittin up would be be$t

>Vandin: Flip the fuck out.

NOBODY INSULTS YOUR GODDAMN LUSUS

YOU'LL KILL THAT SONUVABITCH

>Vandin: Attack Tassik.

You scream "GOLD", launching your HUGE QUILT MAP onto Tassik.

This is incredibly silly.

>Tassik: Captchalogue quilt map.

Out of terror you captchalogue the HUGE QUILT MAP.

Your modus lists its RETRIEVAL FEE as about FIFTEEN SWEEPS' worth of cash. You may as well burn that card.

alright look thi$ i$ fuckin ridiculou$ let$ ju$t get back to the plan$ here

>Vandin: Mourn the huge quilt map.

You still have no idea what it was or why you had it.

>--[We are not splitting up, that isnt up for negotiation}--

>Tassik: Insist.

alright fine how about a vote

everybody for team ta$$ik $ay aye

There is an absolute deafening cacophony of silence.

>Vandin: Retort.

>--[Everybody for team not incredibly stupid say aye}--

You really hope you're not about to be greeted with an absolute deafening cacophony of silence.

>Nilvik: Get ready to F-F-F-F-F-FLARP!

Okay, that was incredibly silly. Especially because you're pretty much ready now anyway. Got your TROLL-SCUTTLE HELMET on and your DIGGING GLOVES equipped. You spend some time getting DEATHDIGGER out of your MODUS and by luck you find it first. Now you're pretty much ready to go.

>Nilvik: Be unsure who to agree with

Tassik and Vandin seem to be arguing about the plan to complete the objectives. Both are highbloods though, so you don't know who to agree with, even if Vandin is the higher of the two. You immediately instead begin to think of if there's any way you could involve digging in the plan. Otherwise you'll just end up as another grunt again, which you're generally fine with. You just wish you could utilize your special skills more often.

>Brigat: Flaunt status

I'm higher than both'a you blubberin' pansies, and I say we keep the party together. At least until we kill that generator.

Sometimes your wonderfully high ranking on the HEMOSPECTRUM comes in handy.

>Tassik: Interject

alright how about thi$

my plan involve$ $ome $eriou$ digging

and al$o lot$ of reading

and maybe $ome $opor $lime in there too

>Librus: Side with the higher bloods.

|\Tassik, you're kind of being an idiot. Things are going to work out much better if we stick together. Probably.

Besides, I'm pretty sure that we won't need to do any reading on this quest, or that any slime will be involved. Digging, maybe.

Also, Vandin, was that the HUGE QUILT MAP of the Gardener? Where the hell did you get an artifact like that? And why did you give it to Tassik of all trolls!\|

>Nilvik: Perk up

Did you hear something about digging? Well then, perhaps you might just decide to hear Tassik out...

"---D um... well maybe we should split up. it would allow us to complete several goals at once. not to interrupt or anything..."

Oh great, Brigat doesn't seem to like Tassik's idea though. He's a purple blood and so easily outranks the other two. That's put you in between a boulder and a firm place. Or it would if the metaphor was more fitting. You guess you just really wanted to use it.

>Vandin: Be flaunted at by Brigat.

Kind of a dick move, but okay, he's on your side so that's great.

>Vandin: Reply to Librus.

>--[I sort of assumed it would kill him}--

>--[I mean honestly how many ancient Alternian artifacts arent deadly}--

>Vandin: Listen to Nilvik.

>Librus:... ...

|\There are exactly 42 artifacts that aren't deadly, 715 that aren't lethally deadly, and the rest are quite dangerous, yes. So, yeah, I'm going to have to give you that one. Good point.\|

Tirnet: Get your game on!
You find a suitable gamebat and equip it, your stats are presented to you and the story is told by your... charming game master.
... she's not that good at the story part, but at least she can put together some decent action.
The objectives are also listed for you, going through them it seems that they are in almost opposite directions of each other. It seems now that the group is arguing over weither or not to split the party.

Tirnet: Chime In.

Hard to bbelieve, bbut I think that that the teal and orange have a point. These obbjectives are a good distance apart, and if we split up we can get these accomplished faster. We have enough for even teams, so that is quite obbviously the most logical way to go abbout doing this
There, the voice of reason is being spoken, all of them want to cling together for safety. It's cowardly, two objectives, two teams. Why do they make this so difficult?

>Tassik: Engage ass-kissing.

You sort of forgot that you may or may not be culled if the seablood investigates the whole situation. That...that is not good, considering you already have a rampantly bored troll who might get some entertainment out of ripping your arms off.

let$ li$ten to the $eablood

he$ the future of our $ociety

hell in fact everybody who want$ to $plit up i$ now on team tirnet

i re$cind team leader$hip

>Vandin: Retort.

>--[Speed isnt really that important, especially if we take out the spawner first}--

>--[Splitting up just makes it more likely that we will get our asses handed to us}--

>--[Especially since both objectives are probably traps}--

Also, you really hate that ass-kissing Tassik in a completely platonic way.

>Tassik: Counterprosal.

Alright, Vandin, let's play it your way. You put on your best TROLL HENRY CLAY stance and begin being the compromiser.

okay i have an idea

everybody on team tirnet who want$ to $plit up go one way

and everybody who want$ to $tay together goes the other

>Vandin: Reject.

>--[You cant fool me that easily}--

>--[Im a master manipulator}--

A more self-aware person might have said that ironically. This fact flies over your head like a tiger defying the laws of gravity.

>Zerset: Suit up.

Having crawled out of your pitycove long enough to engage in the plottin', you naturally shirked to the back of the group so you wouldn't have to talk to anybody. Unfortunately, that snotblood (wait, how are you calling him that? His blood's the same shade as yours! You suck) with the fucked-up eye seems to have had the same idea (unless he's just gotten high and zoned out coincidentally near to the spot you've picked to stand in, fuckin' greenblood junkie scums) so you're making an incredible show of not looking at him. You aren't sure whether or not it's working yet.

Anyway, you don the traditional attire of someone of your character class: THE ROULETERRORIST.


...Yeah, your class doesn't actually have a traditional attire, given that you're the one who made it up. As a result of this, your class is pretty terrible, and doesn't actually give you any special abilities at all, but when you flicked through the rulebook you couldn't find the class you wanted - some sort of "malignant gambler"-themed thing - so you made one for yourself. The name isn't even that good.

Back to the topic at hand: you pointedly don't get involved in the political discussion going on, and go back to wallowing in self-hatred.

>Horkos: Interject
As mucj as I hate, in a platonic wayy, at thw moment, to admot, but Tathhik is right. Spiltting up is the moost sensible.

>Librus: Be mildly annoyed at the asskissing/manipulating going on. Highbloods and their damn scheming. Seriously, whatever happened to planning things out, looking for the best solution, pro and con analysis? But no, it's all boiled down to blood color and backstabbings and shenanigans of the like.

|\Fine, fine, let's split up then. Whatever.\|

|\Who's going to take down the mob-generator? Because that's where I'm heading.\|

>Horkos: Offer
Ooh! I''ll go!!!

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