Adventures at McBurger Planet: An Image-Based CYOA (On Hiatus Until We're Not)

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when are you updating this thing @Link_to_Future ?

Evil Smurf:
when are you updating this thing @Link_to_Future ?

As soon as feasible.

I think both Zero and I knew that when school started, it was going to become that much more difficult to coordinate our efforts. Between his commitments for school and me trying to finish up my last semester at college, sometimes our free time is minimal.

Zero has my notes for the next update but he's already let me know that he probably won't be able to draw it until at least tomorrow unless his homework suddenly becomes a non-issue.

We're still going to be trying to get out as many updates as we can. We just have other things we need to work around now.

Thanks for reading so far everyone. It's been a lot of fun so far and we have a lot of fun things still lined up in the future. Stay tuned. :)

((Also, if you guys have any questions for either of us, feel free to ask.))

Yeah, I just got swamped after I missed a day of school for a college visit.
I'll update when I get the chance.
Until then, back to work. .-.

ask questions.

oh wait, it was ask questions, then knock him out wasnt it. welp, may as well ask questions.

Look throw the new hole in the ceiling.

TheDarkEricDraven:
Make sure he isn't dead. If alive, get medical help. You can't handle having taken two lives today.

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Fortunately, your amazing skill at abusing cause-and-effect has not claimed another fatality. You breathe a sigh of relief.

The Inuit reeks of bass. o.o

SkyeNeko:
ask questions.

oh wait, it was ask questions, then knock him out wasnt it. welp, may as well ask questions.

image

Something about this guy smells fishy to you. Time to interrogate the suspicious man.

"What are you doing here? Who do you work for? WHY DON'T ANY OF YOU SEEM TO ENJOY THE DELICIOUS GOODNESS OF A PLANET BURGER (TM)?"

No response. Seems as though he is not faking his fanciful forty winks.

Hmm...but you might be able to take advantage of this...

RaNDM G:
Check Eskimo's pockets for valuables. Abscond.

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"If you'd like me to rummage through your pockets for phat lootz, just sit there in silence."

...
...
...

Well, if he insists...

image

Unfortunately, you are unable to admire your ill gotten phat lootz. It's way too dark in here to appreciate their splendor.

Evil Smurf:
Ask your self, what would Duke Nukem do?

image

You imagine that the big man would probably be less subtle about your current predicament than even you are being.

Oh...oh, come on. Don't whip that out here!

"Hail to the king, baby! Ahhhhhhhhh..."

OH GOD THE HUMANITY! HIDE THE CHILDREN!!

image

God damn you hate your imagination sometimes.

Lil_Rimmy:
Take the Inuit on your shoulder and run out the door, following the other Niuits. When you encounter another person, claim that the prisoner had attacked you and that's why Mr. InClown UitMan is unconscious.

When they get a squiggly black scribble above their head, punch them in the snout.

If they resist...

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Well, it would rude just to leave him here like this. Maybe you'll be able to use this poor bloke as a cover story.

You shoulder your burden and advance.

image

Ok seriously, what is up with this place?

What do you do now?

Weekend at Bernie's.

You know what to do.

Play the console with the other ninjas. Order pizza and sprite

find your lovestruck wo/man, cop a feel to confirm sex as they help you carry the inuit body

Wait until the Niuits die/lose/complete a round of whatever they are playing, then tell them to get up and off, claiming it is your turn.

If they get up, put Mr. Brain Damage next to you, put a controller on his lap and start to play.

If they get a squiggly black line above their head, punch them in the snout.
Or don't. Maybe leave an area for once without somehow endangering every living and un-living thing in the room.

Take off your mask and admit everything that has happened up to the point you were knocked out. The clown guy was pretty upset when he thought you were dead, so these are probably good guys.

Throw Inuit through doors for dramatic entrance.

SkyeNeko:
find your lovestruck wo/man, cop a feel to confirm sex as they help you carry the inuit body

image

The most frustrating thing about all of these black suits is that it's impossible to tell any of these henchmen apart. How are you supposed to differentiate all of the bodacious bros from the beautiful babes with all these restricting layers?

Although you're fairly certain this isn't the Ninuit you successfully seduced in moments prior, you decide to conduct a test to help gauge gender for future interactions.

Unfortunately, the results are inconclusive. Further experiments will be required in the future.

Evil Smurf:
Play the console with the other ninjas. Order pizza and sprite

image

Oh hell to the yes! Time to show these punk ass noobs how a real l33t gamer plays.

You promptly displace the enshrouded participants and declare the need for someone to order refreshments. One can't be expected to conduct a workshop on mad skillz on an empty stomach.

RaNDM G:
Weekend at Bernie's.

You know what to do.

image

Oh yeah, forgot about this guy. Must seem awfully suspicious to have an unconscious Eskimo slung over your shoulder.

You set the dead weight down on the couch beside you and attempt to play for two. However, playing against yourself is never as satisfying as taking on a worthy opponent. There is never any real thrill in the victory this way. As it stands, there's no way you can put your heart into it.

The Ninuits watch humorlessly as you fail to beat yourself with any sort of passion. They do not seem to be fooled by the act.

TheDarkEricDraven:
Take off your mask and admit everything that has happened up to the point you were knocked out. The clown guy was pretty upset when he thought you were dead, so these are probably good guys.

image

Well, it looks like the jig is up. Time to come clean.

image

You explain everything about what's been going on since you woke up to this newly captive audience. Well, everything except for accidentally killing that guy in the cell. That's one detail that might be best to keep under wraps for the moment.

The others seem briefly dumbfounded.

Lil_Rimmy:
Or don't. Maybe leave an area for once without somehow endangering every living and un-living thing in the room.

image

This idea strikes you as a fresh change that would probably be a fairly welcome turn of events. Unfortunately, the mob does not seem to agree.

You begin to reach as they begin to charge.

kiri2tsubasa:
Throw Inuit through doors for dramatic entrance.

image

There may be no doors nearby, but you enter the fray as dramatically as possible.

As Dad always says, "Never underestimate the power of a good flip."

Oh Dad, your endless wealth of entrepreneurial knowledge always seems to apply to these situations completely and totally unrelated to restaurants. He really is a proving himself to be quite the sage.

What do you do now?

It's a squiggly black line.

You know what to do.

Wonder whether or not you are wearing any cloths at all. Punch nearest ninja in the face to establish superiority.

Act so insane, they will be unable to do anything to you out of pure shock.

pillowfight!

pick up your weapon from the couch, bash into nearest ninja

Use pillowcase as decoy. Hide something heavy inside to swing around.

attack the ninjas with the pizza that just arrived, but first have an epic monologue

Swing the controllers wildly by their cords.

Lil_Rimmy:
It's a squiggly black line.

You know what to do.

kiri2tsubasa:
Punch nearest ninja in the face to establish superiority.

image

Squiggly black line? You are unable to see any sort of meta-artistic shorthand for frustration and are therefore unable to tell which target your unruly whims are directing you to attack.

You decide to make a judgment call and deck the Ninuit who is currently hurtling through the air. Unfortunately, you are not in the sufficient position to nail him in the nose for the most optimal display of dominance.

Oh well, this should be sufficient.

Captainguy42:
Swing the controllers wildly by their cords.

TheDarkEricDraven:
Act so insane, they will be unable to do anything to you out of pure shock.

image

This is the best idea ever. How will anyone possibly be able to penetrate this spinny attack of doomy doom? Between the threat of being clunked in the head by solid plastic and your maniacal expression, how will your foe possible be able to make any sort of move?

Oh yeah, you're really getting this battling thing down to an art.

image

The Ninuit calmly points out a flaw in your defense.

This guy is good.

SkyeNeko:
pillowfight!

pick up your weapon from the couch, bash into nearest ninja

image

Since there are no pillows around, you decide to use a couch cushion. That's the next best thing, right?

image

You strike a badass pose and swing.

He doesn't stand a chance.

image

Unless he catches it, of course. That caveat seemed so obvious that you didn't need to say it, right? You had totally considered that as something he might do and are totally not caught off guard at his sudden display of cat-like reflexes.

image

OH GOD WHY DIDN'T YOU LET GO? CURSE YOUR NATURALLY IRON GRIP!

image

Thank Bowie that this body was here to break your fall. That could have been really bad otherwise.

Fortunately, as it stands no one important was hurt seriously by that attack.

image

You rise back to your feet and face your dangerous aggressor. Looks like a straight on attack isn't going to cut it against someone with this much raw skill.

What do you do now?

Okay, bad guy, clearly a bad guy. Throw the pillow away and rush him.

Your shoe is loose. Kick in the direction of the ninjas nuts, the shoes goes and nails him.

quickly throw the pillow at the ninja. his ninja reflexes demand he catch it. proceed to tackle him while he is distracted.

Hide behind the pillow and pretend you're invisible.

Resuscitate one of his comrades, the law of conservation of Ninjutsu will demand that he'll now only be 1/2 as strong.

Tickle him. To death.

Attempt to drown Niuit in water thingy. If that doesn't work, drown yourself.

Unlock the dark secrets of an obscure martial art to defend yourself.

Or pretend you're a ghost. Everyone knows ninjas are shit scared of ghosts.

dress as a pirate, everybody knows that ninjas are locked in an eternal war with pirates. This might even scare the angry ninja away.

Evil Smurf:
dress as a pirate, everybody knows that ninjas are locked in an eternal war with pirates. This might even scare the angry ninja away.

It'll just make him madder! If we stay the course, WE ARE DEAD!

A Gent of Villainous Intent:
Hide behind the pillow and pretend you're invisible.

image

Well, trying to hide from danger has helped you so much in the past. Why not try it now?

GAH!

The fearsome Ninuit tries to combat your fearfulness with a fearsome blow. It ends up piercing clean through the delightfully plushy cushion.

This is a marked improvement from it piercing your delightfully plushy torso. Seems as though fearfulness has won the day.

TheDarkEricDraven:
Okay, bad guy, clearly a bad guy. Throw the pillow away and rush him.

SkyeNeko:
quickly throw the pillow at the ninja. his ninja reflexes demand he catch it. proceed to tackle him while he is distracted.

image

Now that your opponent is tethered to your fluffy shield, it seems like the optimal time to discard it.

You push the cushion away with a mighty shove. The Ninuit is inclined to follow suit.

kiri2tsubasa:
Your shoe is loose. Kick in the direction of the ninjas nuts, the shoes goes and nails him.

image

You attempt this maneuver even though you know that you tied your shoes exceptionally tight this morning.

It does not matter. Even without projectile soles, the action is completed sufficiently and with testicle-shattering efficiency.

Lil_Rimmy:
Attempt to drown Niuit in water thingy. If that doesn't work, drown yourself.

image

Suddenly, you remember that kickass opening scene in that one spy movie staring Vladimir Putin. You have always felt a strange affinity to that scene, although you have never been able to quite put your finger on why.

The spy in that movie was quite good at using water to subdue that one dude. You decide to use this moment to make a stirring homage to that great moment in cinema history.

Unfortunately, your source of liquid is slightly more contained.

However, this doesn't deter you from giving it the old college try.

What do you do now?

Snap his ninja neck.

Plug in the water cooler socket and electrocute him.

put him into a headlock and drive his head into the tv

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