>KT: Use WATER KIDNEY to scan for nearby ISLAMIC CENTERS OF PEACE to ransack.

>KT: Look around for nearest LANDMARK.

The nearest LANDMARK is a small BRITISH FLAG.

>KT: Use WATER KIDNEY to scan for nearby ISLAMIC CENTERS OF PEACE to ransack.

You use your WATER KIDNEY'S standard-issue RADAR ARRAY to search for ISLAMIC CENTERS OF PEACE. It informs you that the nearest one is several thousand miles away, in the IBERIAN PENINSULA. Looks like it's being burned down by some SPANIARDS, though. That'll show 'em!

>KT: Ransack British flag to fill RANSACK METER so you do not implode.

MN>Die so KT can become the new main character.

KT> Walk north for 300 metres.

>KT: Ransack British flag to fill RANSACK METER so you do not implode.

You RANSACK the BRITISH FLAG.

...

You're getting lonely.

KT: >Walk north for 300 metres.

You do so in an effort to take your mind off the all-consuming loneliness of your current situation; a final, desperate attempt to preserve your sanity after weeks of solitude and bleak, desolate landscapes, whether endless blue or endless green or endless gray.

You find a SHOVEL.

>KT: Dig a hole to China, claim land/make friends there

>KT: Dig a hole to China, claim land/make friends there.

You attempt to CLAW your way to CHINA. Unfortunately, your DIG skill is currently at 0, and you quickly become CONFUSED!

MN>Remember your old gym teacher yelling at you to get up whenever you fell down, then get the hell up and do something to get away from the police

>KT: Wait. Where the hell are you, anyway?
>MN: Reveal yourself, having dug a hole with your mouth through the earth to just below where KT is now.

>KT: Wait. Where the hell are you, anyway?

You aren't entirely sure. You journeyed into the GREAT OCEAN several weeks ago, on the order of the POPE! Unfortunately, he forgot to provide you with a COMPASS. Alright, so, you might've ACCIDENTALLY pawned the COMPASS off to pay for your SWORD. And you might have slightly pawned off your BOAT to pay for your ARMOR. Which might have resulted in you very intentionally embarking on a PERILOUS SEA VOYAGE riding an ATYPICALLY NON-STURDY CHUNK OF HOUSE DEBRIS. Also, you might've gotten lost and crossed the entire OCEAN.

The significance of this is lost upon you.

>MN: Reveal yourself, having dug a hole with your mouth through the earth to just below where KT is now.

This character is too busy DYING SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY to follow your commands!

MetroidNut:
>MN: Reveal yourself, having dug a hole with your mouth through the earth to just below where KT is now.

This character is too busy DYING SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY to follow your commands!

So we're done with him then? we're not supposed to give commands to MN? we just leave him in the dirt to die?

>MetroidNut: Explain self.

The idea is that something has to be done in KT's side arc in order to progress in the main body of MetroidNutQuest 2012 - it's sort of a trial version of a possible mechanic for later on down the line. Looks like I didn't make any of that clear enough; my apologies, you have to understand I'm making quite a bit up as I go along, and things don't always work out. But, hey, I'm fully open to feedback! If you, the readers, would prefer I dropped KT, I'm most willing to wrap his bit up quickly and return to the main story.

This shall of course be decided...through DEMOCRACY.

Ignore the KNIGHT TEMPLAR in favor of the DARING ADVENTURES of the FAR SUPERIOR and DASHINGLY HANDSOME PROTAGONIST? (Y/N)

>N

No. That's stupid. You're not even handsome.

>MetroidNut: Retort.

Consult my avatar.

>MN: Begin STEREOTYPICAL VISION QUEST while laying in YOUR OWN BLOOD.
>KT: Grab the SHOVEL and walk NORTH until you see something.

>KT: Walk in the direction the shovel handle is pointing.

>KT: Take SHOVEL NATIVE BANNER

And

>KT: Punch LAND in SNOUT to establish superiority

>KT: Continue existing.

You take a moment for a deep, slow breath. You aren't entirely certain how you know, but it is nonetheless abundantly clear to you that your continued existence has been permitted by the soft, billowing winds of fate. No, not fate. The ethers...of democracy.

>MetroidNut: Invent more official feedback method.

Should you have any comments or criticism on METROIDNUTQUEST 2012, feel free to PM them to me, MetroidNut! Just put "MQ2012 Feedback" as the subject.

>KT: Grab the SHOVEL and walk NORTH until you see something.

You grab the MASTERWORK SHOVEL!

You're a bit hesitant to WALK NORTH until you see something, though. You're fairly certain that would be a while! And you probably shouldn't venture so far from FORT BOXIA. Not while the FORT is so poorly-defended, at any rate! Much remains to be done before PLUNDERING OF FOREIGN LANDS can begin!

>KT: Punch LAND in SNOUT to establish superiority.

How can the ground be so hard?

>Dig hole with MASTERWORK SHOVEL, then place WATER KIDNEY in the hole and fill in the hole.

>Dig hole with MASTERWORK SHOVEL, then place WATER KIDNEY in the hole and fill in the hole.

You no longer have the WATER KIDNEY.

On a related note, you feel your HYDRATION meter dropping dangerously!

>KT:Turn around and see a connotatively placed lake full of Drinking water. Drink the water.

>KT:Turn around and see a connotatively placed lake full of Drinking water. Drink the water.

You were just looking this way thirty seconds ago, numbnuts! There's no LAKE FULL OF DRINKING WATER over here! And even if there was, you're pretty sure it would have relatively few connotations of placement!

You are now ALL THINGS CONSIDERED RATHER THIRSTY! You can last a while in this state, though - you really should commence with the FORTIFICATION of FORT BOXIA before dealing with your LACK OF HYDRATION!

>KT: Ponder the newfangled ideas of that Martin Luther guy. Alternatively, complain about everyone getting so worked up over Gutenberg's latest fad; there's no way movable type will ever catch on.

>KT: Ponder the newfangled ideas of that Martin Luther guy. Alternatively, complain about everyone getting so worked up over Gutenberg's latest fad; there's no way movable type will ever catch on.

For shame! If not for the fact that he isn't going to be born for almost three centuries, you would give that DASTARDLY HERETIC a STERN TALKING-TO, by which you mean STABBING! As for the other one, MARTIN LUTHER seems like a pretty cool guy.

>Martin Luther: fight cops. dont afraid of anything

>KT: Dig up your water kidney to retrieve it.

>Martin Luther: Continue being a pretty cool guy while rebelling against the Man (The Man in this case being the Catholic Church).

>MetroidNut: Apologize for delay.

Sorry, bad week. Can I make it up to you? Here. How about some MASTERWORK ART?

>Martin Luther: fight cops. dont afraid of anything

I think that's an acceptable 100th panel.

>KT: Dig up your water kidney to retrieve it.

You can't remember where you buried the WATER KIDNEY! It's not your fault, of course. It isn't like you had anything small, plantable and BRITISH to identify the WATER KIDNEY'S location! Oh, cruel fortune.