Share DnD stories

So I'm soon going to be taking up the d20s and playing DnD with my friends, but I just like to hear any amusing stories, or tales of badassery, or epic betrayals, things like that.

Wrong forum, while yes DnD is a role playing game, a discussion on stories belong more in the Gaming Discussion forum. Might I suggest asking a mod to move it?

Try /tg/

What Asclepion said. /tg/ is full of awesome of awesome stories of tabletop game sessions.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=storytime

Mm. Sorry bout that. Thanks for remaining civil about it.

Saltarius:
So I'm soon going to be taking up the d20s and playing DnD with my friends, but I just like to hear any amusing stories, or tales of badassery, or epic betrayals, things like that.

Haven't really played RPGs enough to have any really cool stories but if you haven't already I'd suggest checking out The Spoony One's series of videos and blog posts called Counter Monkey.

You can find them at the following sites:

http://spoonyexperiment.com/category/counter-monkey/

(All his videos are up on youtube if you can't get Blip to work).

http://countermonkeybook.blogspot.co.uk/

Stories range from funny like the Invisible Jason story (though that's actually about a LARP) to awesome, like Tandems Last Ride or Thieves World and informative, like his videos and blog posts on rules, getting into role playing and more. I would say his funniest videos are Vegan Steve & The Djinni of Jengai Fomogo, The Importance of Wearing Pants, The Age of Manure and The Toilet Pizza.

Here's a sample from the written version of the Leaping Wizards story:

Share a story with you that I hope makes you laugh. I was invited to play a game and I knew nothing about it. I went over to my friends house and I was pretty damn drunk. I got over to my chair and sat down next to this really cute goth looking chick. Got no idea what I was doing in the game and I kept telling everyone to call my penis the Dungeon Master, lol. I was making them laugh and I noticed that the goth chick had whispered something in my ear. I went outside with her and she lit up a smoke. She took a couple of drags off of it, then grabbed my face so she could kiss it. She made out with me for about 10 minutes, until a white car showed up and her boyfriend got out. Boyfriend didn't see us because there was a tree in the way. The girl ignored me for the rest of the game. The game was finally winding down, it was pretty late. Was shoved in the side by my friend because he was trying to wake me up off his couch. He told me that the goth chick was someone he met at the bars and she had overheard him talking about DND. She was going to sleep with me, but I was to drunk. I asked him about her boyfriend, he kind of just shrugged and didn't really know what it was about.

I've found a few good stories online and have experienced a few myself. I'll edit them into this post when I get the time.

EDIT: For reference, the two best one's I've got are "When all of the undead decide your camp is a tasty snack" and "Changlings make Intrigue much more complicated". Which would you all like to hear?

I was playing a swordsman from the Dragon Coast (I think) hired by my companions to escort them across the sea when our ship was suddenly caught in a typhoon and beset by pirates! I had just made my way to the deck when I noticed in the crow's nest of the enemy ship there was a woman who was either a mage or priestess of some kind controlling the storm to keep us from escaping.
I drew my bow and shot at her. A Natural 20! YES!
But the DM then described how my shot was deflected by a shield of wind surrounding her.
In outrage I threw down my bow and bared both of my swords, never bothering to try to protect myself as I leaped amidst the enemy sailors. Each roll of the die (usually a disappointing piece) came out with Critical 18's, 19's, or 20's. Pirates fell before me left and right, screaming in pain. Some tossed themselves overboard in a panic.
I had single-handedly defended our journey, and was given the enemy ship as a prize.

This is not the forum. Move to gaming discussion.

Saltarius:
Mm. Sorry bout that. Thanks for remaining civil about it.

:)

I mostly played AD&D. I tried D20 but I could not play consistently for me to get a feel for it. I still want to try Ghostwalk, however.

I remember rolling good enough to play a paladin for one campaign. Because the DM enforced alignment restrictions, I had to pick something that would fit with the party, who were mostly lawful or good told him that I wanted to be a paladin of a vegetation god. Doing that gave me enough freedom to work within the party, but still not violate the edicts of my Deity.

According to the Complete Priest's Handbook, a vegetation priest basically looks after the wilderness. I was in charge of protecting the wilderness. I was not too concerned with the people and things living inside the wilderness, and I got along with rangers, druids, huntsmen, trappers, adventurers, and so on. To me, as long as they did not harm the wilderness more than was necessary, they were allowed to move though it. What is more than necessary? Well, gathering firewood enough timber to build a house, and gathering enough food and game to feed a family is fine, but chopping down trees indiscriminately or hunting animals for one part then leaving the rest for the wild animals was a no no.

I got along great with the rest of the party. Never had to deal with the prisoner's dilemma because the DM never put us into those situations.

Zen Toombs:
I've found a few good stories online and have experienced a few myself. I'll edit them into this post when I get the time.

EDIT: For reference, the two best one's I've got are "When all of the undead decide your camp is a tasty snack" and "Changlings make Intrigue much more complicated". Which would you all like to hear?

The undead camp attack sounds good.

I just got through a session with my level 8 bard and we encountered 9 margoyles (stone gargoyles)and they were at the bottom of a 1500 foot pit and we were clearing the area for a trade root. These things were not in my range of attack so I decided to bring up and idea and asked the GM a question. "Can I throw a monkey from my hoard of monkeys down there like a bullet?" The GM, after 30 minutes of outrageous laughter says it's not against the rules. I hand one of the monkeys to a guy who could fly and he throws it down at one and at a 5% hit chance kills it with over 300 points of damage. Never underestimate the power of terminal velocity, a mad monkey and one insane Bard.

 

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