Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

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I brush the towels off.

"Gee, I'm fairly surprised you've only made fun of me for the sweaty part about Equius."

"So." I hand out cigarettes to all present. "Who's the associate?"

I take the cigarette and combine it with my make-up bag, creating an unholy fusion of nicotine, lipstick and mascara that writhes on the floor for a few minutes before dying.
"Goddammit, I needed that lipstick."

I glare indignantly.
"I have no idea what you're talking about. I have never stuffed anyone into any type of waste receptacle."

MinimanZombie:
"Well, fuck it." I jump from the Mall Fight line to the American Gangsters line.
"I'm chilling with these dudes for a while."

TEAMMATE LOST!

Sigma Castell:
I throw another towel at Salts face and continue polishing the gangster, this time his face.

"Oh God, he's buffing my face!"

Paddy the Second:
"So." I hand out cigarettes to all present. "Who's the associate?"

"Well, isn't this civil?" He says, flicking the cigarette away.

"The man who told you to come here. The one you shot in the leg and left in police custody! If he told about this place, he must have spilled more! Tell me what I want to know!"

"Let's just plug 'em now and leave."

"Not yet. I'm not finished yet."

"Hold up, you mean the auction guy? I've taken a lot of drugs since then and wasn't really paying attention."

"...Oh shit."

I finish donning my new outfit.

"This is so fucking cool!"

"We did no such thing. I bet it was Knife. Or RaN. Those two are crazy."

I fire my last thermite shot into Zomb's chest.

I return the nail polish to my bag, and take out my lipstick. The cap folds away with a pressurised hiss, and I start drawing obscene images on the gangsters cheek.

Saltarius:
I fire my last thermite shot into Zomb's chest.

You punch a hole through his heart.

DAMAGE: -6

The mobsters take cover, retrieving handguns and shotguns from their coats. They respond in kind, clipping Salt in the side with buckshot.

DAMAGE: -3

ROUND TWO! FIGHT!

???: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII------

MALL TEAM: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII---

"Fuck."

"Salt what the hell."
I draw my revolvers and shoot one of the guys in the chest.

"OH LIKE YOU HAVEN'T GOTTEN US INTO WORSE TRILBY!"

I roll over to Paddy's legs and load up some regular rounds.

"OW OW OW, SHIT SHIT SHIT!" I start firing at Salt.

I lie down.

"I SHOT YOU WITH THERMITE! IN THE HEART! HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ABLE TO STAND, LET ALONE FIRE ACCURATELY?"

"Yes and I have paid attention to those criticisms, and am trying to become a much NICER FUCKING PERSON! YOU DICK!"

TrilbyWill:
"Salt what the hell."
I draw my revolvers and shoot one of the guys in the chest.

He's down.

DAMAGE: -6

MinimanZombie:
"OW OW OW, SHIT SHIT SHIT!" I start firing at Salt.

You graze a round off his skull.

DAMAGE: -2

Saltarius:
"I SHOT YOU WITH THERMITE! IN THE HEART! HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ABLE TO STAND, LET ALONE FIRE ACCURATELY?"

Karma.

"OBVIOUSLY YOU HAVEN'T TRIED VERY HARD!"

I fire again at Zombie.

I roll out of the room.

I shrug.
"Fuck it."
I take cover, and start lobbing grenades towards Salt.

I pull out a golf club and start hitting the grenades back at Zombie.
"I tried to be diplomatic in the auction, and I was trying to be diplomatic here!"

Paddy the Second:
I roll out of the room.

Nice abscond.

MinimanZombie:
I take cover, and start lobbing grenades towards Salt.

It rolls right in front of his face.

*BANG*

DAMAGE: -6

Salt will respawn after one turn.

I realise these guys need to die for progress to happen and stand up. I walk back in the room and shoot a gangster in the face.

I use the golf club to pull a gangster towards me, then start beating him over the head with it.

I taze Zombie in the face, then expertly apply my makeup.

Paddy the Second:
I realise these guys need to die for progress to happen and stand up. I walk back in the room and shoot a gangster in the face.

He's down.

DAMAGE: -6

TrilbyWill:
I use the golf club to pull a gangster towards me, then start beating him over the head with it.

Your attack is ineffective against the man's reinforced fedora. You only deal a measly DAMAGE: -1.

He promptly takes the club and beats you over your pathetic trilby, dealing a concussion inducing DAMAGE: -4.

Sigma Castell:
I taze Zombie in the face, then expertly apply my makeup.

DAMAGE: -1

Salt respawns.

I walk up to the nearest gangster, pistol-whip him, and blast him in the chest.

I shoot the gangsters with my Molotov Launcher.

"Fedoras are for Nice Guys!" I yell as set a gangster on fire. "And I don't mean that in a good way."

I wipe the make up off my face, after I've stopped shaking from the electricity. I then pull out my sword and stab Sigma in the stomach.

I look down at the sword in my stomach.
"Ow. What was that for?"
I use the last of my strength to stab Zombie in the eye with Blendsword.

Saltarius:
I walk up to the nearest gangster, pistol-whip him, and blast him in the chest.

He collapses, clutching his left side.

DAMAGE: -2

TrilbyWill:
I shoot the gangsters with my Molotov Launcher.

Paddy the Second:
"Fedoras are for Nice Guys!" I yell as set a gangster on fire. "And I don't mean that in a good way."

Everyone is on fire. BURN ALL: -2

MinimanZombie:
I wipe the make up off my face, after I've stopped shaking from the electricity. I then pull out my sword and stab Sigma in the stomach.

That's a kill shot. DAMAGE: -6

Sigma Castell:
I look down at the sword in my stomach.
"Ow. What was that for?"
I use the last of my strength to stab Zombie in the eye with Blendsword.

Likewise. DAMAGE: -1

???:

MALL TEAM: II

Close call.

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