Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 635 636 637 638 639 640 641 642 643 . . . 887 NEXT
 

"Is that a white flag I hear?"

"It's a ceasefire."

"Your terms are acceptable."
I shoot Knife in the dick.
"That's for causing all this shit by existing in the first place."

"Fuck." Knife says as he respawns, "No need to be a d...ouchbag about it."

"I know. I just wanted to do that."

"Hey, is there a Cineworld or anything similar in the mall?"

"I don't know for sure, but I'd put money on it." Knife says.

I fall off the church roof. "Ow."

My tulpa watches Salt and Sister paintballing, getting slightly uncomfortable about all the sexual tension.

"...I'm getting the uncomfortable implication someone is watching me in here."

My tulpa feels somehow dirtied by his actions, at a very intrinsic level.

"...Paddy? Is that you?"

"..."

"No."

"..."

"What are you doing in the bathroom? Why are you watching us?"

"..."

"No I'm not."

"..."

"...Did I just hear your pants unzip? Or...was that them zipping back up?"

"..."

"There was no zipping."

"..."

"Are you or were you jacking off to me and Sister playing paintball?"

"..."

"Neither."

"..."

"How can I be sure?"

"Because I'm not real so how could I masturbate?!"

"HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW IF YOU WANT TO MENTALLY PROJECT A WANG?"

"I don't like looking at cocks dude! They're all gross and weird looking!"

"I'm still really uncomfortable with this situation. What if you write really fucking creepy friendfiction about this?"

"My friendfiction is of the highest quality!"

"SO YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU ARE LITERALLY WRITING A FUCKING FRIENDFICTION DURING OUR FIRST DATE."

"..."

"No."

"..."

"Is that a 'no' no or a 'yes' no?"

"..."

"It's not not a no no."

"..."

"Why Paddy."

"..."

"..."

"..."

My tulpa disperses.

I walk out of the bathroom, visibly shaken.

"Yeah, ok, you win."

I remain on the ground at the base of the church tower.

"We're off to a good start at least."

Sister belts you one in the gut her t-shirt cannon. You crumple to the ground, gasping for breath.

"Ha ha ha ha ha!"

You must have saw that coming.

"Yeah okay...you *cough* win. We get it."

"You should have seen the look on your face!"

Paddy the Second:
I remain on the ground at the base of the church tower.

"We're off to a good start at least."

Now what?

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 635 636 637 638 639 640 641 642 643 . . . 887 NEXT

Reply to Thread

This thread is locked