Taco News - Activision to Sell Games in Lootboxes

Taco News - Activision to Sell Games in Lootboxes


Reality can be stranger than fiction; what follows is written too much like reality to be real, and instead lands somewhere beyond irony, beyond reality, but just south of memes.

In a messy, frantic newsroom, a newsie sprints across the cheap carpet and blasts through the cheap plywood door of the editor's office. Small shards of wood litter the ground, and an editor shaped suspiciously like a Taco asks the newsie what he has. "New report from the internet this morning, sir?" The Taco frowns pensively, "You shouldn't believe everything you read on the internet, kid. That place is full of lies; run it on the website."


Payment for this article was given in the form of a lootbox.

With the inclusion of loot boxes in several large triple-A games, the next evolution was inevitably going to follow. Today, Activision has announced that not only will future games continue to integrate loot boxes into their games, but what game you buy will be in the form of a loot box.

We sat down with CEO Bobby Kotick, while passing interns offered us drinks. After a quick coffee order, we started the interview proper. "We've made it possible for gamers to experience that feeling of joy of getting that new weapon or emote and fused it with the act of buying the game itself."

Kotick went into more detail about how the system would work. The attendant came back with five mystery glasses, we selected one, it was a Mountain Dew Code Red.

"For physical copies, we've sent retailers an actual box which can contain anything from the actual game you want to buy to a coupon for $5 off Blizzard games. Customers who prefer digital copies won't be left out, the store will generate a code which again has a range of possibilities. We really want players to get the joy of experiencing surprise every time their open their wallets. Every game is like a surprise party for your wallet."

"We're also looking into integrating micro-transactions into the gameplay to a higher degree. For the Call of Duty fan, this might come in the form of buying Specialist Bullets which are regular bullets but with a fancy casing. Or that makes money appear as they fire through the air, which tested very well with sniping enthusiasts in our focus groups. Our camping division also praised the new Teabag Sprays; we have something for everyone here."

While the announcement was met with a mixed reaction, some developers looked at the news more positively. We bought seven blanked out magazines sitting in the Activision lobby, most of which were outdated car magazines or Playboys, but the last of which was a copy of a game development magazine. Overwatch designer Scott Mercer had this to say:

"Gaming is always about showing off what you got, it's just easier now to spend money on it rather than grinding to get it. This replaces the time factor with a money factor and I'm firmly in the opinion that time is more valuable than money. As long as the act of opening the box is cool, people will spend as much as they can so they can have the most unique loot that money can buy."

Be on the lookout for the Activision Gaming Press Starter Kit which includes a pre-written 10/10 review score and a trial code for three free loot boxes.

As soon as we find the box with that press kit in it.

Permalink

Yah! It's like an extra game with your game!

I for one welcome our creative game industry tycoons looking for ways to enhance the fun!

Heh, i'd see Activision attempting to do this if they were allowed to.

This is the future, I give it five years, max, before they're selling games this way. On every publisher's proprietary store.

Hate to break it to you (or Activision), but G2A beat you to it;

https://news.g2a.com/news/g2a-loot-creative-gaming-cases-now-available/

Good god man, I know this is supposed to be satire, but don't give them ideas!!!

Xsjadoblayde:
Hate to break it to you (or Activision), but G2A beat you to it;

https://news.g2a.com/news/g2a-loot-creative-gaming-cases-now-available/

I was gonna say, pretty sure this was already a thing.
Hell, I'm pretty sure GoG had some kind of pi?ata thing recently which had random games.

The joke of this one is that Bobby Kotick can speak in a fashion that we mere mortals can understand.

As he is an Ancient One, one that shall bring about the great fall of the gaming people as he feeds upon the masses with countless, gaping maws. There shall be no wallets left swollen with money and no survivors. As he is the Endbringer.

I enjoyed the article, got a chuckle out of me.

Wait, that wasn't real!? Someone help me, I can't discern satire from reality! Things are so confusing when you can't understand nuance and context.

Taco is an oracle masquerading as a jokester. I give it 4 years til this is reality.

What's this? A Taco News article with nobody bitching in the comments?!

image

Xsjadoblayde:
Hate to break it to you (or Activision), but G2A beat you to it;

https://news.g2a.com/news/g2a-loot-creative-gaming-cases-now-available/

Shhhh, quiet you! Kotick's auditory pseudopods are very sensitive! He'll hear your text!

TrulyBritish:
Hell, I'm pretty sure GoG had some kind of pi?ata thing recently which had random games.

Yeah, but that was a promo where you paid $3 for games that were more than $3.

Imagine if that's the only way they sold games and they were more expensive.

Neverhoodian:
What's this? A Taco News article with nobody bitching in the comments?!

Well, you kinda are.

Was not going to say anything though because I was trying to respect the attempt at a compromise made by...whoever, since clearly it was moved over from the 'News' section in an attempt to appeal to complaints made my me and others.

But if you need reassuring that I still dont like it, well, I still dont like it, but again, I was trying to be grateful that some attempt was made by the site to compromise here.

.......They fuckin' would too if they thought they could get away with it.

*shakes Taco*

Don't give them any ideas, Taco! Don't give them any ideas! :o

Gordon_4:
.......They fuckin' would too if they thought they could get away with it.

Seconded. ;_;

I heard a rumor that Activision was going to move in the direction of Macrotransactions.
They're like microtransactions, but they cost more so they're obviously worth more.

Why does this article have a Zero Punctuation logo attached to it on the main page if it wasn't written by Yahtzee?

Don't get me wrong, as with everything Taco has written it was an amusing read, but the ZP logo is very misleading and hardly appropriate.

DarthCoercis:
Why does this article have a Zero Punctuation logo attached to it on the main page if it wasn't written by Yahtzee?

Don't get me wrong, as with everything Taco has written it was an amusing read, but the ZP logo is very misleading and hardly appropriate.

It shouldn't and it didn't when it was posted (and as of this morning, it didn't).

When ZP was posted, something must have gone goofed in the system. We'll look into it.

tippy2k2:

DarthCoercis:
Why does this article have a Zero Punctuation logo attached to it on the main page if it wasn't written by Yahtzee?

Don't get me wrong, as with everything Taco has written it was an amusing read, but the ZP logo is very misleading and hardly appropriate.

It shouldn't and it didn't when it was posted (and as of this morning, it didn't).

When ZP was posted, something must have gone goofed in the system. We'll look into it.

This is what I can see right now

image

DarthCoercis:

tippy2k2:

DarthCoercis:
Why does this article have a Zero Punctuation logo attached to it on the main page if it wasn't written by Yahtzee?

Don't get me wrong, as with everything Taco has written it was an amusing read, but the ZP logo is very misleading and hardly appropriate.

It shouldn't and it didn't when it was posted (and as of this morning, it didn't).

When ZP was posted, something must have gone goofed in the system. We'll look into it.

This is what I can see right now

Image snip

Just a FYI for you (and anyone else wondering); we adjusted all the images but have been unable to figure out why the system defaulted to ZP like that.

So for now, we'll post the next one with all the images already in (it's weird and technical but long story short is we think it'll prevent this next time) and just have to leave this one as is.

If it happens again with our fix, we'll dig in more but for now, we'll leave it be rather than risk screwing around in the Tech side and hope we don't break something important :)

Sorry for any confusion but I assure you it wasn't on purpose to deceive :D

tippy2k2:

Just a FYI for you (and anyone else wondering); we adjusted all the images but have been unable to figure out why the system defaulted to ZP like that.

So for now, we'll post the next one with all the images already in (it's weird and technical but long story short is we think it'll prevent this next time) and just have to leave this one as is.

If it happens again with our fix, we'll dig in more but for now, we'll leave it be rather than risk screwing around in the Tech side and hope we don't break something important :)

Sorry for any confusion but I assure you it wasn't on purpose to deceive :D

Hooray for glitches! Now go have a beer.

... You know, they'll do it if given the chance. And die hard fans will spend money on it, encouraging them to continue if not try coming up with greater schemes. That's how the gaming industry is for us right now, an attempt to see who can rip off customers harder :(

Caramel Frappe:
... You know, they'll do it if given the chance. And die hard fans will spend money on it, encouraging them to continue if not try coming up with greater schemes. That's how the gaming industry is for us right now, an attempt to see who can rip off customers harder :(

Quite. A sad time indeed.
Though I must say that your current avatar goes truly well with your post.

So now we have to buy a game and we have to buy a story and we have to buy to win too! But what is this industry! giving money in exchange for a aleatory reward is very similar to the principle of slot machines and more and more people are making the connection.

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iphone 6 achat iphone 7

 

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