Zero Punctuation: Resident Evil 5

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This might be my favorite one yet. Or at least one of them. *goes back to watch it again*

ElTigreNegro:

bjj hero:
Cracked me up. I hate RE games with a passion, I didnt play 4 but I downloaded the demo hoping things had improved... OH... DEAR...

Controls were shit, cant move and shoot, very bad but could be explained, your aiming I guess. Cant move with a knife drawn. WTF?

I guess you just suck at aiming, go back to play Gears of War if you just want to run and shoot aimlessly.

Actually, once I figured out only head shots count the demo was easy. I said the controls were shit, not the aiming. Theres no good reason not to be able to move and shoot and no excuse not to be able to move and use the knife.

I dont play GOW, prefer CoD 4 myself. Its not "aimless" shooting if there is an enemy on the recieving end of the bullets. I guess moving and shooting would be too much for you, one thing at a time...

bjj hero:

ElTigreNegro:

bjj hero:
Cracked me up. I hate RE games with a passion, I didnt play 4 but I downloaded the demo hoping things had improved... OH... DEAR...

Controls were shit, cant move and shoot, very bad but could be explained, your aiming I guess. Cant move with a knife drawn. WTF?

I guess you just suck at aiming, go back to play Gears of War if you just want to run and shoot aimlessly.

Actually, once I figured out only head shots count the demo was easy. I said the controls were shit, not the aiming. Theres no good reason not to be able to move and shoot and no excuse not to be able to move and use the knife.

I dont play GOW, prefer CoD 4 myself. Its not "aimless" shooting if there is an enemy on the recieving end of the bullets. I guess moving and shooting would be too much for you, one thing at a time...

It's ok, you just don't like fun games.

hahaha, what a brilliant review! Wtf is up with the inventory screen? lol.

I was thinking of getting this game, but now im worried that itll ruin my memories of RE4.. lol

great review! finally somebody else besides me thinks this game looks exactly the same as RE4 but with different wallpaper. why do developers continue to give players AI partners? it never works except in republic commando, but nobody played that game.

I knew this was a piece of junk. Thanks Yahtzee, you and NC are the reason I get up on wednesdays, and you really didn't disappoint. I love it. :D

ElTigreNegro:

bjj hero:

ElTigreNegro:

bjj hero:
Cracked me up. I hate RE games with a passion, I didnt play 4 but I downloaded the demo hoping things had improved... OH... DEAR...

Controls were shit, cant move and shoot, very bad but could be explained, your aiming I guess. Cant move with a knife drawn. WTF?

I guess you just suck at aiming, go back to play Gears of War if you just want to run and shoot aimlessly.

Actually, once I figured out only head shots count the demo was easy. I said the controls were shit, not the aiming. Theres no good reason not to be able to move and shoot and no excuse not to be able to move and use the knife.

I dont play GOW, prefer CoD 4 myself. Its not "aimless" shooting if there is an enemy on the recieving end of the bullets. I guess moving and shooting would be too much for you, one thing at a time...

It's ok, you just don't like fun games.

Great come back, were you thinking about that long?

Ill stop poking the fan boy now.

BUG.exe:
great review! finally somebody else besides me thinks this game looks exactly the same as RE4 but with different wallpaper. why do developers continue to give players AI partners? it never works except in republic commando, but nobody played that game.

probably for some pretty damn good reason...

Yes I hated the way the AI would constantly waste health items. At one point I was in really bad shape and was about to request one for the purpose of mixing and got a face full of magic healing lysol instead. So yes co-op is the only way to play.

Roffey123:
Oh how I will hate the coming days as I try to complete this game with her in tow.

I just don't get it. If you know you're going to hate playing a game, WHY WOULD YOU PLAY IT? It reminds me of trying to play engineer in TF2 when a soldier is near-by picking up every scrap of metal every single time he fires one rocket - you just want to bitch slap him and tell him to use the dispenser but you know he won't listen! An entire game of dealing with that sounds like a damn nightmare!

I really want a cream egg now....

Great vid

First time comment on a Yahtzee Review

But.....

I loved that last line

Capcom aren't bad people ...............they're just idiots

Lol

300lb. Samoan:

Roffey123:
Oh how I will hate the coming days as I try to complete this game with her in tow.

I just don't get it. If you know you're going to hate playing a game, WHY WOULD YOU PLAY IT? It reminds me of trying to play engineer in TF2 when a soldier is near-by picking up every scrap of metal every single time he fires one rocket - you just want to bitch slap him and tell him to use the dispenser but you know he won't listen! An entire game of dealing with that sounds like a damn nightmare!

Exactly, play what you enjoy. You have the best name ever btw, are you really 300lbs?

I always thought Resident Evil was more about inventory management than killing zombies so I guess RE5 is going back to the basics.

Where DID that pirate trader go?

He was the most awesome thing in Resi 4

Loved the review Mr Croshaw BTW

BUG.exe:
great review! finally somebody else besides me thinks this game looks exactly the same as RE4 but with different wallpaper. why do developers continue to give players AI partners? it never works except in republic commando, but nobody played that game.

I have no problem with AI partners or teammates. Games like Gears of War and CoD do it right (mostly) when the AI is only expected to KILL whatever isn't you or other mates. When they're required to kill AND manage weapons/ammo AND heal themselves and others, that's when the shit starts to fly. It's like teaching a young child their ABCs and then expecting them to speak complete sentences right afterward.

yourbeliefs:

Ummm....

First off, "Alone in the Dark" was the originator of the Survival Horror genre. It may not have been as successful or credited, but when RE1 came out everyone mentioned how it was like AITD. RE3 was forgettable at best, not nearly as good as "Code Veronica." RE5 is NOT RE4 but better. It's RE4 but WORSE. Aside from looking a LOT better, nothing that RE5 added enhanced the experience that RE4 gave me. The added co-op partner was unnecessary, and the insanely limited inventory just adds frustration. Any inventory system that assigns an arbitrary size for various objects (egg = AK47?) and doesn't allow full functionality between the two inventories (Why do I have to bring all the herbs to Chris in order to MIX them) is NOT good game design. And as far as having a friend to play with, that's a luxury not afforded to everyone. I don't have any friends to play RE5 with, let alone maybe have a 360. I'm not going to deal with XBL because I'm not relying on someone I don't even know to watch my back and progress in a game. Maybe I will when I beat the game the first time, but it still means I'm stuck with a bad partner. Granted, her AI could be a lot worse, but they REALLY should have put some customization in to allow us to tailor her to be the kind of partner that we want. If we could tell her WHEN we wanted to be healed or which weapons we preferred her to use, it would be MUCH more tolerable. But we don't have that option. Capcom just seemed to assume that we'd like whatever scheme they threw at us, but clearly many of us DON'T!

Actually there was a game made way before that in japan which sprang it all off and Alone in the dark adn Resident Evil both took inspiration from that game. Personally I found Resident Evil 5 the worst in the series, it lacked pacing, it was too short, I didnt feel scared or frightened and it was too easy. Next to that I found Resident Evil to be the worst out of the original 3 but it did have the most memerable boss out of them all. Resident evil 2 is what I would say was the best in the series, sure the controlls were bad but it had creative creatures that were scary (I can remeber the scene were they introduced the licker which was very scary considering the time it was made in), It was well paced, it was scary,it had a brilliant music score, Amazing graphics for its day, Bad voice acting.. and many many more.

Maybe Sheva's ludicrous bust prevents her from holding the machine gun properly. By the same argument, Chris' arms should make it impossible for him to reach body parts for herb use, though...

Anyway, I'd be surprised if Capcom weren't morons; they'd really be bucking a trend if RE 5 was genuinely witty and thought-provoking in ways that weren't mostly unintentional. I'm still thinking about Dead Rising's "Americans are fat and evil" plot twist and laughing.

bjj hero:
Exactly, play what you enjoy. You have the best name ever btw, are you really 300lbs?

Thanks! I am 300 lbs, sadly I'm not Samoan. Only in spirit!

Agreed, also why not just keep the Case system from RE4!!!

that was a neato review, i wish i could be a real man like chris

Tharticus:
Another great video review. I like Resident Evil 4, but sometimes I hate it for it's quicktime events which ends in a rather nasty death if you don't hit the right buttons at a split second. Resident Evil 5? Same trash except it's just not the same as RE4.

And the creepy Merchant guy died.

Quicktime events did not really annoy me in RE4, but I do not think they were used as much as they were in RE5. That or I just really do not like that game.

As for the merchant, he didn't die, he just decided "Why the fuck am I in harm's way?" and went to the beginning of chapters to sell you things.

EDIT: Did anyone else notice that the herbs magically became a health spray thing? To me, it looked like they crushed the herb into a powder and sprayed that into each others eyes.

Although I agree with Yahtzee's sentiments on this game, I cannot help but feel he was being a little harsh. I and all my friends had a great time with this game even though we saw the same broken issues described in this review.

Roflololololololololololololo(?)
I hate RE5...

300lb. Samoan:

bjj hero:
Exactly, play what you enjoy. You have the best name ever btw, are you really 300lbs?

Thanks! I am 300 lbs, sadly I'm not Samoan. Only in spirit!

As your attorney, I strongly advise you take enough ether till you think your Samoan! ;)

Tharticus:
Another great video review. I like Resident Evil 4, but sometimes I hate it for it's quicktime events which ends in a rather nasty death if you don't hit the right buttons at a split second. Resident Evil 5? Same trash except it's just not the same as RE4.

And the creepy Merchant guy died.

I have slow reactions and that quick time event knife fight took me forever to beat >_<

But Yahtzee is getting back on form I feel, this was both entertaining and felt like a review

gee yahtzee saved me $67 on not buying this pos , guess i'll buy beer instead mmmm beer

I wonder when he will do Madworld.

All enemies, in all games, should from now on shout, "Unga Bunga Booga Wooga," whenever attacking the player.

Actually, I think I'll start using that to answer the phone...

300lb. Samoan:

bjj hero:
Exactly, play what you enjoy. You have the best name ever btw, are you really 300lbs?

Thanks! I am 300 lbs, sadly I'm not Samoan. Only in spirit!

I think were all a little Samoan on the inside.

Fangface74:

As your attorney, I strongly advise you take enough ether till you think your Samoan! ;)

Sounds like a good ticket! After all, if a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing RIGHT

Great review as always, I felt exactly the same way about an hour after starting the game. The inventory system was awkard and unintuitive and the sidekick seemed an entirely unnecessary aspect (I hate sidekicks in nearly all games).

However:

For any players irked by the inventory system (or worried they will be if they play), situations like the one yahtzee mentioned arise quite rarely (for me at least), and the most important aspect to remember is that you can access your items instantly via use of the d-pad, making it very fluid when you get used to it.

Though i don't like the idea of a sidekick so much, she becomes much less annoying after you get used to her habits and can adjust her inventory accordingly (ie. if you want her to use a machine gun, i tend to give her a machine gun and no other weapons). The lack of ability to give tactical commands (wait here, go there, etc) is a little annoying at times, but i circumnavigated this problem completely by having a friend I play a lot of co-op games with.

In my opinion it's a brilliant game, even moreso in co-op (it's not exactly shoehorned in; it works very well with the game and you quickly find yourself tacticising with your ally to tackle the various situations). I did indeed get it on the midnight launch and me and my friend are on around our 4th playthrough now (short game but plenty to unlock).

As with most of Yahtzee's reviews, right on the mark in many places, but i'd urge you to not take it too seriously as you could well be missing out on a seriously great experience for the sake of a couple of minor annoyances.

First Unskippable and now this? Sure taking a thrashing despite being out for a few weeks.

The notion that the AI is bad has put me off for now until they patch it, re-release it or in the spirt of this review kidnap a hobo.

I was not too worried about the racism in the game... at least there is an reasonable explanation why the darkies attack you, as for the tribesman, I found a document in the tribes-village about the evil, whitey, oil-fags injecting the tribesmen with las plagas (or whatever you call it these days). As I said, I was not too worried... until Sheeva dug out the longbow... but as said: Capcom are not bad people...

A brilliant video as always. One slight problem, the plural of octopus is really octopuses. Not octopi like stated in the video.

But I am sure this was just a small oversight from a man as great as yourself ;)

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