Zero Punctuation: Metal Gear Survive

Metal Gear Survive

This week, Yahtzee reviews Metal Gear Survive.

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That didn't sound all bad, context of the development aside.

Also #FucKonami

Wow didn't expect Yahtzee to be one of the more fair reviews for this game, color me surprised.

It says it was posted at 10:00 a.m. but I swear it hasn't popped up until only a few minutes ago

Wow, I knew the 'MetalGear' part was going to be tacked on...but like...its not even set in the Metal Gear world!? They literally could have called it something 'Not Metal Gear' and it would be what it is.

Fuck you Konami.

Saelune:
Wow, I knew the 'MetalGear' part was going to be tacked on...but like...its not even set in the Metal Gear world!? They literally could have called it something 'Not Metal Gear' and it would be what it is.

Fuck you Konami.

No, you're doing it wrong. It's #FucKonami. God, Saelune.....

Yeah, from what I've heard this is pretty much in the same canon zone as Snake's Revenge or Ghost Babel. AKA none at all. Apparently the only reason it's not complete garbage is because they had the FOX engine to build off of.

Others have said it but I'm not really sure who this was made for. Zombie games are all over the place now and have long since worn out their welcome. If you want a Metal Gear Game, there's like 8 of them to choose from at this point(more if you want to play the side ones). You can grab the Legacy Collection which has all of the canon games but V for less then survive would cost you.

Hell, if you just want to play around with the FOX engine, it's not like MGSV is a short game(and if you try to 100% then you're looking at 100 hours at minimum).

The concept of paying to unlock a save slot, with silly defend the fence segments which are essentially easy mode, and the annyoing mechanic of dust-which-eats-oxygen. People invented the air mask (a scarf) about 2800 years ago, so the dust *must* be magical. #FucKonami #RedRocketZombiesSuck

Bah, I never cared about this whole #FuckKonami bullshit.

Overblown passion over a franchise that would never re-capture the peaks of the first 4 Silent Hill games and yet I still think Silent HIll is overrated and Metal Gear Soild 4 had its conclusion that satisfyed me enough.

And there are enough Contras and Castlevanias to go around with, we don't need another one.

4Aces:
The concept of paying to unlock a save slot, with silly defend the fence segments which are essentially easy mode, and the annyoing mechanic of dust-which-eats-oxygen. People invented the air mask (a scarf) about 2800 years ago, so the dust *must* be magical. #FucKonami #RedRocketZombiesSuck

Paying for additional saveslots (or rather, additional character slots) isn't a new concept. It's just the first time they decided to add it into a regular solo/coop game, not a subscribtion based MMO or a F2P game.

Then, the "silly defend the fence segments" are actually just "defend a zone - and if you want to make it silly by just hiding behind one fence, that's up to you" (that said, the basic chainlink fence is apparently the most useful item you can build)

And yes, that dust is indeed magical. Well, nanomachincial, apparently (it's still Metal Gear, after all, so it's either magic or nanomachines at this point. Sometimes both.)

"When they blew up his boat because they were upset he didn't invite them to his pizza party . . ."
Is it sad that I legitimately can't tell if that's a joke because it seems believable that Kojima might actually put that as motivation for bad guys?

This game is dog shit and boring.

As a long time MGS fan, this is pretty much what I expected. Not terrible or even bad but not more than a "meh".

RJ Dalton:
"When they blew up his boat because they were upset he didn't invite them to his pizza party . . ."
Is it sad that I legitimately can't tell if that's a joke because it seems believable that Kojima might actually put that as motivation for bad guys?

That's actually an amusing take on why the first Mother Base got blown up. At the very end of Peace Walker, the jailbait schoolgirl whose been hanging about the base pretending to be a naive peacenik steals Big Bosses Metal Gear, reveals she was actually a spy the whole time and gives him the choice to join Cipher or die. Cue the final boss battle fighting a half naked Latina Tara Strong in the metal gear you spent half the game building while J-pop plays in the background.

Kojima is a creative genius 6 year old, I fucking swear.

It's heavily implied in Ground Zeros Cipher was kinda pissed you didn't take them up on their offer. Though apparently Skullface and XOF went rogue from Cipher(because everyone goes rogue in this series) as well so who fucking knows.

At least it's not fucking nanomachines driving the plot.

Samtemdo8:
Bah, I never cared about this whole #FuckKonami bullshit.

Overblown passion over a franchise that would never re-capture the peaks of the first 4 Silent Hill games and yet I still think Silent HIll is overrated and Metal Gear Soild 4 had its conclusion that satisfyed me enough.

And there are enough Contras and Castlevanias to go around with, we don't need another one.

It goes beyond mishandling of franchises. There's also mentally abusing employees. The CEO of Konami is also part of a healthcare company that focus on insuring gaming companies. Kojimas new company cannot get health insurance because of this guy.

RaikuFA:

Samtemdo8:
Bah, I never cared about this whole #FuckKonami bullshit.

Overblown passion over a franchise that would never re-capture the peaks of the first 4 Silent Hill games and yet I still think Silent HIll is overrated and Metal Gear Soild 4 had its conclusion that satisfyed me enough.

And there are enough Contras and Castlevanias to go around with, we don't need another one.

It goes beyond mishandling of franchises. There's also mentally abusing employees. The CEO of Konami is also part of a healthcare company that focus on insuring gaming companies. Kojimas new company cannot get health insurance because of this guy.

There's also the fact Konami threatened to blacklist any of their employees who quit to go work for Kojima over this whole thing.

Which is a massive dick move no matter how you slice it.

Not letting Kojima accept the award for the game he designed was also unnecessarily dickish.

darkrage6:
Wow didn't expect Yahtzee to be one of the more fair reviews for this game, color me surprised.

He didnt put Battlefront and Andromeda on the Bad Games of 2017. This is the future of game development of the AAA industry: Dont excel, achieve mediocrity and move on and the ambitious fools fall on their own sword

Good review everyone is bashing this game. But I don't like what they did to Kojima so meeeh I'm passing this one or I might try it through other means.

 

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