Zero Punctuation: Duke Nukem Forever

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Yhatzee is the man, first off.

Secondly, how depressing was it to work at that company on the production side? To see all of your work just thrown out, then you get moved to another company or project with nothing to show for your time served.

And my third point is this:

12 years and nothing to show for it? Damn, just damn.

This was quite unexpected, in the best possible sense.

Nice to see Yahtzee take this piss out of Duke - really, the development of this game was so ridiculous that it reads like the premise of a game industry sitcom.

*reads through the comments after snickering through the video*

I'm getting the feeling that sarcasm is a foreign life form to a lot of people commenting here...

Were (/are) people seriously thinking that this was an actual review, until someone else pointed out it that it is a joke?

And I completely agree with the review. I gave up waiting for another Duke Nukem After Half Life and the numerous other FPS games that followed came out. It was one of those 'well, I would like to see it some day...' things, you hoped it would happen, but wouldn't really care if it didn't. Also, seriously, 12 years. 12 F'king years. I'd never bothered to pause and think just how long it had actually been, since I'd been seeing preview screenshots since roughly 1999.

This was a delicious slaughtering of a life long running joke. Bravo.

Lol, I could tell he was kidding when he said that he liked the game.

Clever work Yahtzee, you actually made me pause to see if I had been epically trolled by 3D realms before I belatedly realised it was you.

Best "review" in a while, good way to break the monotony of quite dull games lately.

The last sentance of the "Review" was when I realized we where all taken for a wonderfull sarcastic ride. (: (i.e it hasent really come out yet.)

wAIT WHAT

i thought this was very good but i kinda prefer when something somewhat normal is taken and turned into something hilarious, for example, on the MGS review when you talk about solid snake reminding you of a throbbingly painful erection

Drokles:

hippykiller:
WHAT THE FUCK?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR JOKING ABOUT IT BE OUT?! i was really looking forward to buying it.

Well, the joke was based on the recent new that their cancelling it or something. It's not like I've read it or anything, but that's somewhat how it is.

So if you didn't know already I guess you'd be disappointed. Although frankly why expect any better?

well i didn't know so i am now going to cry myself to sleep.

this game once it finally comes out has got to bet to be better that Jesus and cure at least the common cold for Christs sake

soooo, was the game good or bad?

I'm completely amazed at the stupidity of some people who posted in this thread... THE GAME ISN'T OUT YET! THE WHOLE REVIEW WAS A SHAM! A very good, funny as hell, done-in-a-perfectly-sarcastic-voice-the-entire-show hoax, but a sham none the less. Now, please read carefully. This game franchise has sucked, does suck, and will suck... Forever! Which is ironically the length of production for this game.

Shapsters:
Pretty funny, I doubt anyone saw Duke Nukem Forever coming did they?

I'm going to miss that character though, thats the only reason anyone really would have bought it, nostalgia or because they genuinly enjoyed Duke as a character.

I think publishers are sometimes like the Fox Network and people like its audience. Instead of funding excellent shows like Arrested Development or Firefly they spend money on crap like [insert fox reality show here](don't know any shows, only show i watch on that channel is The Simpsons).

Duke Nukem Forever is almost like an example of the infinite monkey theory. If you put an infinite amount of monkeys in front of an infinite number of typewriters and give them an infinite amount of time they will eventually make Shakespeare. But sadly I dont think they had enough monkeys/computers/time.

It pisses me off because publishers wasted millions of dollars on this game when they could have spent that money on funding great games like Psychonauts,Braid etc.Games like Assassin's creed give me hope because it was a huge risk and it paid off. Hopefully publishers will learn a lesson from it.

TL;DR

Holy crap over 400 replies...

I think this is was his best review yet.

Never got into the Duke Nukem series, guess that's a good thing. Great satire, I loved the occasional hint of a rant that would pop up, especially when talking about the screenshots. Very Colbert-like. I hope he does more, unexpected stuff like that.

lonny2x4x5:
soooo, was the game good or bad?

It was beyond good or bad ... it was mind-blowing.

Thats pretty funny, confused me a bit in the beggining. Totally unexpected

as a huge fan of Duke Nukem i found that review kinda... insulting? i don't know, this is the first time that any of Yahtzee's reviews have ever touched on a game that was particularly close to home.

Call me a fool but i was genuinely hurt when 3Drealms closed and IMO it sucks that I'll never get to play the sequel I've been waiting for MORE THAN HALF MY FUCKING LIFE.

PS. 3Drealms was self funding DNF for the last decade. Take2 didn't give 3Drealms a cent and therefore it is stupid as hell that Take2 would try to sue them for it.

Wow, that was... different! Props for doing something so odd this time around, even for ZP's standards!

Since I never had a decent computer in the mid 90's, I never knew much about Duke Nukem to begin with, but that's a really great point made about our industry that a developer could spend twelve years on a game and never show anything for it, while brilliant independent gamers are being snubbed. Executive meddling ruins everything!

Still, it's a shame that DNF probably will never come out. After all of its development time, we should have expected something absolutely astonishing... anything below that would be considered a betrayal of trust. Now that the project is halted, it's more of a kick in the balls than a simple betrayal of trust.

BEST REVIEW EVER.

And I was particularly impressed by the fact that he used a PS3 controller but got achievements for his 360. You know, that should be an achievement on the 360. Beat a game with a sony controller.

My fellow Escapists, this is proof positive of Yahtzee's genius.

CNKFan:
I was not expecting this to be reviewed. On another note, if DNF is released and it is the gaming equivilent of Jesus then Yahtzee will feel like an enormous douche and issue an apology. But the day that happens will be the day that humans have evolved the ability to fly.

Yahzee wouldn't appologise. He'd just make another video actually reviewing it and justifyhis previous video by saying something about them deserving it for taking 12+ years.

Yeah I had no idea what we was talking about until I read some of these comments. He had me there, wait.....the game is already out????? Just hope one day it will come out.

this was one of his funnies ones in a long time ^^

but i wonder!
that picture next to President Obama, what/where was that from?

Final proof, if you actually need any, that Yahtzee is NOT a serious reviewer, he's a comedian- and a FUCKING good one too! I love it!

Dessembrae:
this was one of his funnies ones in a long time ^^

but i wonder!
that picture next to President Obama, what/where was that from?

I'm pretty sure that was the poster from 'Pan's Labyrinth', apparently his idea of a more intelligent, mature modern movie. He's right, but it was a surprising choice.

i didn't like it. it felt like a cop out and confused me.

Funniest review in a while. I completely agree that 3D Realms was a steaming pile of shit from day one and anyone who bought into it had their head up their ass. However I think you are naive for assuming that investors do proper research before blowing their money on projects that have a %0 chance of success. There are more than a few of gullible but wealthy investors out there- if 3D Realms hadn't taken advantage of them, then someone else would have.

It was all a lie?
Nooooooo!
lol, I doubted it at about the middle of the video :P

Arcane Azmadi:
Final proof, if you actually need any, that Yahtzee is NOT a serious reviewer, he's a comedian- and a FUCKING good one too! I love it!

Dessembrae:
this was one of his funnies ones in a long time ^^

but i wonder!
that picture next to President Obama, what/where was that from?

I'm pretty sure that was the poster from 'Pan's Labyrinth', apparently his idea of a more intelligent, mature modern movie. He's right, but it was a surprising choice.

yea it is pans labyrinth, why i have no idea but here is link to the poster for those of you who wondered http://greatganesha.files.wordpress.com/2007/02/pans_labyrinth_poster_3.jpg

Funny review but if he was going to do a joke review I'd have prefered it to be on Dwarf Fortress or Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup.

Aah, you can't beat sarcasm can you.

Well, as a fan of DN3D, but only having been slightly aware of the concept of Duke Nukem Forever until a couple of years ago, I still found this video to be hilarious. In fact, I think this is the most I've laughed at any of Yahtzee's videos, which says something because I tend to find his reviews to be pretty funny already. Of course, I knew it was a joke from the beginning, because I've been following some discussions about 3D Realms and DNF lately.

as a huge fan of Duke Nukem i found that review kinda... insulting? i don't know, this is the first time that any of Yahtzee's reviews have ever touched on a game that was particularly close to home.

If you've watched all of Zero Punctuation up to this, you must understand by now that this is the way Yahtzee does things. It's almost inevitable that he'll eventually get around to a game that actually matters to you. You shouldn't let yourself be bothered by it, because this is what Yahtzee DOES. Even if you disagree with what he comes down on it for, either try to view it objectively enough that you can still laugh at the jokes, or at least ignore it, because he treats every game that way.

Sarcasm... overload.... ahhhh!!!! *head explodes*

The DNF team got fired, see God exists.

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