Zero Punctuation: Bionic Commando

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I think he raised some legitimate complaints. Badgered-up physics are a problem, but not as much as unmarked instant-death walls. That's all kinds of messed up, at least put in a buffer zone in which one's geiger counter bionic-arm upgrade chirps.

Or make the rads part of gameplay instead of an obnoxious impediment to it. Say, give you a radiation meter that builds when you're in irradiated territory and empties when you leave it, maybe some kind of protective system with limited capacity.

But the load times would really get me. Actually, having to face install times on a console would get me. It's a frelling console, you're supposed to stick a game in it and play. Not stick a game in, do your laundry, clean the kitchen, teach the dog to play the accordion and then play.

I'd also be annoyed over the inability to clobber things with pepsi machines. Maybe they could disgorge pop cans if you hit someone with them hard enough? :)

.

Letter of the week should be a feature. So we all get to laugh at others idiocy and make ourselves feel good inside.

I know I'm not the only one thinking it.

I've no beef against Pepsi, but it's far from my favorite soda. Mug Root Beer FTW!

pepsi spiderman :D
also, John Stirling fail

Brilliant as ever!
That letter at the end was fantastic albeit the person who sent it needs to seek help lol
And coka cola is far better than pepsi but i hate product placement in games as it is

There needs to be a "SHADENFREUDE-TASTIC" T-shirt.

Loading...... I think this review Loading......... is a pretty good Loading........ -.- Loading....... oh for fuc- Loading........

Finally a "your mum" joke that I can willingly visualise...
Wow, my mom kicks ass.

I feel for the guy who wrote the letter at the end. The is no way he can be that stupid, it had to be a joke.

And Pepsi does taste like crap.

You know what I would find funny? If Yahtzee was influential enough to affect product sales. Just imagine a worldwide boycott on Pepsi now. Suddenly Yahtzee becomes very important.

When I saw the 'letter of the week' I could see the inevitable message from miles away.

Paulrus_Keaton:
I feel for the guy who wrote the letter at the end. The is no way he can be that stupid, it had to be a joke.

And Pepsi does taste like crap.

You don't know who John Sterling is, do you?

the best episode in a long time :)

To: nathan-dts

Don't be retarded with capitalization
and dont speel check me when you cant spell either
it's douche not "douch"
besides i wasn't being a douche, i was saying how i thought he had already reviewed this

Lol @ letter of the week

Pepsi's very meh. Anyway, the review isn't one for the ages, but it's still a pretty good one.

Revelo:
Also, did someone seriously write to him asking where to buy Duke Nukem Forever?! I don't want to judge but how stupid and disconnected from society can someone get?!

I know that feeling. I almost thought the game had come out too but around the part where he said the game comes on 14 DVDs it clicked in my head that he was joking.

Okay, someone break out the spoiler tags and tell us the plot twist.

ETA: Oh god, TV Tropes knew it. Get this:

Has no one made a joke about Yathzee being a swinger?

Fuckit then I'll do it: Yathzee's a swinger! That's why he can't unlock that last Duke Nukem Forever achievement!

Also, am I the only one who can't taste the difference between Pepsi and Coke... and bong water?

LadyZephyr:
Okay, someone break out the spoiler tags and tell us the plot twist.

It's at the Wikipedia, and yes it's fucking retarded.

ssgt splatter:

Revelo:
Also, did someone seriously write to him asking where to buy Duke Nukem Forever?! I don't want to judge but how stupid and disconnected from society can someone get?!

I know that feeling. I almost thought the game had come out too but around the part where he said the game comes on 14 DVDs it clicked in my head that he was joking.

Not the bit when he was talking about a cross between FPS, RPG and Cooking Mama, huh? ;)

Great review, although the letter of the week made me die a little inside...

...Someone REALLY asked where you got Duke Nukem Forever...?

...really...?

...REALLY??

...god... /facepalm.jpeg

HELL YEAH, FUCK PEPSI!!

Does anyone know what that ridulous plot twist that he mentioned was?

Pepsi is terrible. Also... yes "Can you send me a link to where you bought it?" hahaha awesome.

John fails.

It looks like Yahtzee is picking through a lot of bad PS3 titles. Are there any good ones?

I know! Pepsi SUCKS D<
What is your favorite kind of pop anyways? Mine's Coke X3

Artemus_Cain:

LadyZephyr:
Okay, someone break out the spoiler tags and tell us the plot twist.

It's at the Wikipedia, and yes it's fucking retarded.

O_o. Yeah I just read it. "WTF" plot indeed. Made me laugh though.

Lol see what i added to the end of the reception section in wikipedia page

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bionic_Commando_(2009_video_game)#Reception

johnman:
Did someone really mail the escapist asking where they got Duke Nukem?
Really?
Come on, own up

John Sterling is either a fictional character or he's dead :P

Ghostwise:
Pepsi sucks. Tastes like dirty Coca Cola.

Actually it has the same taste as Coca Cola... what's it called.... Oh yeah, the taste of shit.

Russian_Assassin:
I wonder if that email was real. If it was then allow me to say: Ahahahah! You retard! :P

Sorry about that. Well, I've seen better reviews, I kinda hoped for Sims 3, he's never reviewed a Sims game, so I figured he would. Maybe next time...

One review of a Sims game, in the form of Sim City Societies, is QUITE ENOUGH. I'm fairly convinced that, rather than being games, The Sims et. al. are meant to be a giant social experiment run by the secret masters of the world, where they sit in their underground bunker going "Holy shit I can't believe they're still playing them! How can they possibly derive any enjoyment from that much micromanagement?? Why would they want to play a video game where you go to the bathroom and to work AAARGH FUCK" *POP* And so their heads will explode, and humanity will be free.

This is a really great review. His recent string of reviews have all been solid.

Loved the constant Loading. And I think that next week will probably by E3.

I loved the part about how the PS3 takes an eternity to get started:). I, too, have thought, many, many times, "I remember one time when you could just turn the power on and play".

Amusing. And the end with the letter was simply hilarious, even though I almost doubt that someone can be THAT stupid or misinformed to ask that kind of question.

But then, of course, my cynicism and sense of reality kicks in.

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