Zero Punctuation: The Second Annual E3 Hype Massacre

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FinalGamer:
I dunno if anyone else mentioned this...but why did Yahtzee not mention Metroid: Other M?
Yanno the big reveal of Nintendo so we could love them again?

Yes, some have mentioned it, but I don't think many people are too enthusiastic about it. I've even heard in a few places people being pessimistic about it just for being co-developed by Team Ninja, "you know, the guys behind Dead Or Alive Extreme," which I wouldn't be surprised to find is Yahtzee's view of it.

Personally I felt like he couldn't decide what to wail on this week so yeah... I do agree that it seemed a bit rushed :\ Still, even with the semi-stupid names, both major releases that came out last week (those being [Prototype] and Red Faction: Guerrilla) seem to be right up his alley in terms of mass panic and destruction with no moral repercussions to worry about ^-^

Quite frankly, I'm waiting mostly on Brutal Legend and R&CF: A Crack In Time, being a fan of Tim Shaffer and Insomniac's furry defender of the multi-verse. And I bought Cross Edge recently to fix the deep RPG gap on my PS3... >.> stop laughing D<

As for the strangulated noise, what the hell O.O Sounded like a drowning cat...

jesus christ everyone is such a bitch
i liked e3
and im hyped about a lot of games. Does that mean im shit too?

[quote="swytchblayd" post="6.119643.2330272"]

quote]

you can blame ubisoft for that

Yes, I think Yahtzee summarised the E3 line-up best with "GGRAALRRRLGGAAARRGGLGLGLGLGLRRRRPRRRRFFFTTTTT"

persona J:
er ye he got the metal gear rising thing wrong its not out for ps3 its and x box exclusive

actually its for 360, ps3 and pc

MacDonaldFin:
Does anyone here actually care for E3?

yes. lots of people

This was the first one to bring tears on laughter to my eyes for ages.
Brilliant =D

Yahtzee, you prescient prick, thank you for summing up my reaction to E3. Almost all of the hyped games looked like shit. On another forum, when everyone was going googly-eyed over Project Natal, I was the first to comment: "yeah, but will it be fun?"

I honestly would have preferred a review, maybe of Prototype (If it released down there), or Red Faction. I don't mean to be sour, I thought it was and I agree with what your saying, but I already knew all of that. I would have at least have liked to have seen what your actually looking forward to, and possibly to have seen a couple shooters get shot down.

O goodness a pun.

... I did not find this funny in the least. Mr. Croshaw, are you losing your touch?

benjtfell:
People = Shit

That pretty much sums up the people that go to E3

Mate that sums up the WORLD

WolfmanNougat:

Yes, some have mentioned it, but I don't think many people are too enthusiastic about it. I've even heard in a few places people being pessimistic about it just for being co-developed by Team Ninja, "you know, the guys behind Dead Or Alive Extreme," which I wouldn't be surprised to find is Yahtzee's view of it.

Yes I've actually met a few of these pessimists and let me say that they should get over it! Correct me if I'm wrong but is Dead or Alive Extreme Beach Volley Ball the only game Team Ninja ever made? No? That's what I thought. It seems people are forgetting about the newer Ninja Gaiden games which aren't perfect but awesome enough, thank you very much.

Speaking of which, I knew Yahtzee would get on Nintendo's ass for the Mario overload we're getting recently and I don't blame him. I still find Mario Galaxy 2 to be an unnecessary title and nothing I've seen so far has changed my idea. But I wouldn't say Nintendo have been complete garbage this year either. You'd think he'd at least give Golden Sun 3 a mentio.....oh right, he hates JRPGs. Well there's also some new stuff regarding Sin and Punishment 2......oh wait, he'd probably bash that for being a "J-rail shooter".

God Yahtzee, sometimes you piss me off.

From what I've seen of Milo, it looks as if Molyneux is determined to go past the Uncanny Valley. Interesting...

Best part was the throat noise he made for summing up the next FF game, pretty much sums up how I feel about the next one as well.

It certainly does look like NAY-TAL

Seemed a bit rushed but otherwise this week's review was pretty amusing. End-credit strangled noises, I've discovered, are really creepy but kind of funny.

"Strangled noise" was the only thing that came close to making me laugh, but even that fell flat. Overall, it was a pretty lame "review". It was actually more like hideous angry-boy banter delivered for the sole intention of sparking fanboy controversy and arguments, consequently increasing the viewer ratings. I can't imagine Yahtzee playing video games or continuing this line of profession for much longer.

Games I'm interested in from E3:
Silent Hill...
...
...
...
...
aw, hell.

Bleh I think I'm starting to get sick of yahztees manufactured exaggerated cynicism. Didn't really find this vid funny at all.
Would be nice to get some info on Game Damage, they've been working on that shit for a stupidly long amount of time now.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

All that fecal blathering and you've nothing to say about Ninja Metroid?

Lol that was brilliant. Credit gargling was so awesome

There was also a lot of suicide in that vid...

Hmm, can I have a large fountain drink with that double shit :D?

I think the Rayman Ravin' Rabbids make that gurgley noise. Yes I owned it, in my dark cretinous years.

As the E3 bashing begins, the Yahtzee hilarity continues.

= WIN

Loved it. Pretty much confirmed everything I was thinking about E3 :D

SUICIDE!!

Another excellent "review". Not quite as hilarious as some of his earlier ones, but still pretty damn funny.

Yeah I heard about Project Natal about 1 week ago on NPR. My thought was "My room is so cramped and claustrophobic i wouldn't be able to make it work, I'm probably 4 feet away from the TV and my Xbox 360 sits behind my TV. I respect that they are trying to make a virtual reality thing, after all if you don't experiment with the technology it will never become stream lined. For example the first cars were not efficient but if they had not been built we wouldn't have vehicles. but i digress, between the NXES display and the new Natal hardware I feel like Microsoft is trying to be like the Wii, which seems stupid considering so many people bought the Xbox 360 because they didn't want to deal with the crazy wacked controllers of the Wii system.
I am looking forward to Assassins Creed 2 even if it isn't futuristic. otherwise nothing else has really caught my interest... thats my two cents.

the gargling reminded me of WoW's Murlocs
its sad but true

Hmm... Felt that a little too much time was spent on the console/interface rambling and not enough on the games themselves. I would have preferred a bit more time spent on them. Take, for example, Alan Wake. I'm not sure what the problem is with it. To me, at least, it looked like it had the potential to be rather good. Of course, with Yahtzee "potential" translates to "nothing's been proved yet" which itself translates to "it'll probably be crap" but still, a bit more than a one liner about the title would have been nice.

I fell out of my chair the the Final Fantasy jibe.

Yahtzee Croshaw:
The Second Annual E3 Hype Massacre

This week, Zero Punctuation shares some thoughts on games hyped at e3 2009.

Watch Video

Yahtzee said Metal Gear Rising was a ps3 exclusive but it isnt. Also I'm surprised he didnt mention Modern Warfare 2 since he liked CoD 4 so much. And I wanted him to talk about Heavy Rain because i wasnt sure if he would completely massacar it or praise its uniquness

I remember when I used to follow what was happening in E3. The hope, the expectations, the daydreaming and fan site building.

God was I naive back then.

@fter 4:05: you need a better theme song.

I loved the way he completely avoided Scribblenauts.

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