Zero Punctuation: Wii Sports Resort

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Gotta say though, Jackson Pollock is the one artist he shouldn't have used for the tarantula at the end of the spider joke, what with him mostly throwing shitloads of paint onto sufficiently large (i.e. gigantic) canvas.

I'd like to try Wii Sports Resort out after watching this just to see if the motions required to do these idiotic minigames are just as halfwitted and unintuitive as Yahtzee makes them sound. I mean canoeing? What the hell have you become Nintendo? Pandering to the casual gamer types is it, well at least provide something halfway decent for them to actually become interested in gaming then!

On a totally unrelated note the credits animation of the wakeboarding imp riding the shark was absolutely hilarious.

Gerbykins:
OH MY GOODNESS, YOU HAVE OUTDOWN YOUR SELF THIS WEEK!
I Coulnd't stop laughing at the jokes, and the hilarity that was contained within this little yellow video from hell :D

I just don't know why you didn't get Wii Resort? I JUST PICKED UP THIS GAME FROM EBAY AND ITS GOD DAMN TERRIFIC!
The Wii motion plus, or the WMP as I like to call it xD is crazy accurate. And now I can play all my favourite games like
Links Archery training.

Anyhow, Piece out Yatzee man, I got a date with destiny. (Going to watch Lost on tv hehe :) cya )

Funny how you can comment on the review before it's even done. Isn't it interesting, guys?
People who post before the video is done are not taken kindly to around here, especially when it's their first ever post. Seriously, if you want to be respected here, act respectable and watch the entire video before commenting. Oh, and BTW... Caps lock is NOT cruise-control for cool. It's cruise-control for FAIL.

Anyway, back to on-topic.

I found this review to be fairly good. It reaffirmed my not-wantingness of this game, but it informed me about it. To be honest, I hardly ever play my Wii. I usually only play Wii Golf or Bowling with my family, and SSBB with my friends or younger brother. The Archery mini-game does look a bit fun, but then again I can always practice real archery with my actual bow.
Yahtzee seemed to have a bit of fresh humor this go around, despite it being as a Fraternity House bathroom.

whee golf!

I have to say letter at the begining was fucking terrific i was literally rolling on my ass laughing..... i think

That was fucking hilarious!! Great work Yahtzee!

This was actually pretty funny. Although I'm not so fond over the title yelling, when he says "Wii Golf!", etc. But I'm just nitpicking now. I was very surprised that he chose to review this game.

Also, I'm a Wii owner, and I'm not leaving. Granted, I'm not a big Wii fan, but again with the nitpicking.

Now with the new responsiveness of the (Wii-mote?) controller I really wish the Wii became and adult erotic entertainment device, and video game system on the side for it's free time.

at least then all the motion sensors could make some sense.

well said yahtzee. :) wii is crap, was crap and it will forever be crap until nintendo won't be its producers. anyway, impressed as usual for your imagination so keep it up ;)

I pretty much agree with that review. The game felt lazy and while it is fun for an afternoon, that is about as much depth it has.

While i'm sure i'll still enjoy the games on my buddy's Wii(I don't have one because i'm some PC loser) it seems cheap to have bowling, tennis, and golf on there again. Now granted the golf in WiiSports wasn't all that great because the controls were a bit fiddly, but bowling was just fine. Although the WMP might make our Tiger Woods games easier(because we golf, and we're too poor to go a real course these days).

I am crying with laughter right now. I think my wii was also crying :)

First time commenting, and I just have to say you've not lost this Wii owner, but then again I am planning on getting rid of the useless lump of plastic so Yippee!

And I found this episode especially tasty by watching it whilst simultaneously eating a Branston pickle and white Lancashire cheese sandwich on soft white bread... Oh yeah! Yahtzee would love it... Good old British food... now back to the Wii-Bashing, as it's even better than it's Bible equivalent.

Speaking as a hoity toity fencer that no one wants to be like, I am glad Yahtzee ganked some good fencing pictures from the internet for his review. Since it seems to be his goal in life to offend every niche group I do not take offense at his comments about fencing. Rather I know that he and 90% of the gaming populous harbor a hidden desire to act out their zoro/jedi fantasies and just lack the training and equipment to do so properly.

Very, very funny.

It's official. Wii owners are pedofiles.

Gerbykins:
OH MY GOODNESS, YOU HAVE OUTDOWN YOUR SELF THIS WEEK!
I Coulnd't stop laughing at the jokes, and the hilarity that was contained within this little yellow video from hell :D

I just don't know why you didn't get Wii Resort? I JUST PICKED UP THIS GAME FROM EBAY AND ITS GOD DAMN TERRIFIC!
The Wii motion plus, or the WMP as I like to call it xD is crazy accurate. And now I can play all my favourite games like
Links Archery training.

Anyhow, Piece out Yatzee man, I got a date with destiny. (Going to watch Lost on tv hehe :) cya )

You couldn't possibly have watched it yet, you utter dick. Reported.

ZZoMBiE13:
Yay, I love Yahtzee Wii reviews!

Also, I want my Fruit Controller to be Mango, please.

I'll take strawberry and a cyberspace helmet as shown :D

Yea, Natal would certainly enjoy it.

A great review, but has the summer release drought already become this bad? At this rate, and I hope I'm dead wrong, he may HAVE to review Mario Kart Wii just because there is nothing out or coming out.

Again I hope I'm wrong and he has some retospect reviews as an emergency fallback.

Ah. Its good to finally see that people who like Wii are not welcome here.

This needed a review? I want my review of Gun Battle Slapfight XXXVII!

Regardless. Good one, Yahtzee, just wish the rest of the world would wise up and realize that the Wii's real name is "Casual Console."

Haha that was nice.

ZZoMBiE13:
Yay, I love Yahtzee Wii reviews!

Also, I want my Fruit Controller to be Mango, please.

Pift, Ps3 fanboys, Mangos sux!

Nintendo use carrots! vegtables are the future!

OMG that was amazing, one of your best..... why does it have all the ones from Wii sports?? xD my favourite part was 'Wii Bowling... oh f*** off .. lmao

Revelo:
What the hell?! Maybe you are a Nintendo exec or just a fanboy but I don't know. I fear you won;t fit in around here well due to attitudes like that =( But since you commented BEFORE watching the video like that I am looking forward to seeing a banhammer swing your way.

wait, how do you know that this was posted before the video? did you sit and incessantly press F5 until the video appeared after the thread was created?

besides, i thought this board was fully of politically correct happy-go-lucky attitudes. i'm sure he'll fit right in.

also, the banhammer thing was uncalled for. this guy did nothing wrong, yet you already want him off the board? what the hell?

Mods are getting lax. There are several people who posted right as the thread went up.

Nice "review," but it seems Yahtzee is out of touch with just what people do at beaches these days. Nobody uses tanks any more because they get too hot. Nowadays, it all ATVs.

ive never lauged so hard.

Oh God; finally someone else has discovered the awesomeness that is a fruit controller!

Mookie_Magnus:

Gerbykins:
OH MY GOODNESS, YOU HAVE OUTDOWN YOUR SELF THIS WEEK!
I Coulnd't stop laughing at the jokes, and the hilarity that was contained within this little yellow video from hell :D

I just don't know why you didn't get Wii Resort? I JUST PICKED UP THIS GAME FROM EBAY AND ITS GOD DAMN TERRIFIC!
The Wii motion plus, or the WMP as I like to call it xD is crazy accurate. And now I can play all my favourite games like
Links Archery training.

Anyhow, Piece out Yatzee man, I got a date with destiny. (Going to watch Lost on tv hehe :) cya )

Funny how you can comment on the review before it's even done. Isn't it interesting, guys?
People who post before the video is done are not taken kindly to around here, especially when it's their first ever post. Seriously, if you want to be respected here, act respectable and watch the entire video before commenting. Oh, and BTW... Caps lock is NOT cruise-control for cool. It's cruise-control for FAIL.

Anyway, back to on-topic.

I found this review to be fairly good. It reaffirmed my not-wantingness of this game, but it informed me about it. To be honest, I hardly ever play my Wii. I usually only play Wii Golf or Bowling with my family, and SSBB with my friends or younger brother. The Archery mini-game does look a bit fun, but then again I can always practice real archery with my actual bow.
Yahtzee seemed to have a bit of fresh humor this go around, despite it being as a Fraternity House bathroom.

I think he had an alterior motive; Some of the things that guy has said don't even relate to Yahtzee's video, it's a bit...odd.

lol damn wii, only good for a dust collector or something heavy to throw at the lound next door neighbours barking dog barking at 2am in the fucking morning..

and wii resort?? WTF get some better ideas NENTENDO

Zero Punctuation is always good for a laugh and this week's isn't any different. And we definitely need to get some work on cyberspace interfaces.

theklng:

Revelo:
What the hell?! Maybe you are a Nintendo exec or just a fanboy but I don't know. I fear you won;t fit in around here well due to attitudes like that =( But since you commented BEFORE watching the video like that I am looking forward to seeing a banhammer swing your way.

wait, how do you know that this was posted before the video? did you sit and incessantly press F5 until the video appeared after the thread was created?

besides, i thought this board was fully of politically correct happy-go-lucky attitudes. i'm sure he'll fit right in.

also, the banhammer thing was uncalled for. this guy did nothing wrong, yet you already want him off the board? what the hell?

First point: Because every post has a time next to it saying when it was posted, surely you should know that by now.
Second point: No he won't, because he's breaking rules.
Third point: Already explained by the second point.
Nice try though.

DEATH TO THE WII!!! BURN BURN!

I have to admit, it wasn't your best, but it was adequate.

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