Zero Punctuation: Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood

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Here's a good idea for a ZP game: the video games have had it with Yahtzee's brutal reviews so the characters from every game Yahtzee has critized over the years invade the real world, kidnap him and take him to the world of video games. Yahtzee must now find a way to escape, battling his capturers. Helping him are characters from games he has liked, such as Gordon Freeman, Prince of Persia, the girl from Portal, Duke Nukem, etc. When you kill your enemies, you can gain their abilities and the ability to diguise as them (if Yahtzee kills Lara Croft, he gets her guns, tight shorts, a ponytail and boobs. Just an example. Yahtzee also gets the power to summon his little army of imps to join him in battle. They can do anything from peeing on them, bumfuck them and everything in between.

RTR:
Here's a good idea for a ZP game: the video games have had it with Yahtzee's brutal reviews so the characters from every game Yahtzee has critized over the years invade the real world, kidnap him and take him to the world of video games. Yahtzee must now find a way to escape, battling his capturers. Helping him are characters from games he has liked, such as Gordon Freeman, Prince of Persia, the girl from Portal, Duke Nukem, etc. When you kill your enemies, you can gain their abilities and the ability to diguise as them (if Yahtzee kills Lara Croft, he gets her guns, tight shorts, a ponytail and boobs. Just an example. Yahtzee also gets the power to summon his little army of imps to join him in battle. They can do anything from peeing on them, bumfuck them and everything in between.

That would have to be the most awesome game ever.
not including the inevitable lawsuit with every video game developer in the world =D.

Too bad everyone is so obsessed with base 10 to realize what Yahtzee realizes; it's just a number.

Favourite moments; "As Thomas you can shoot more accurately, throw lassos and climb ledges, and as Ray, you can open the pause menu, restart the mission and choose Thomas, instead, you fucking idiot." - Yahtzee

Blew my lips off with that one

"HCKWAREZ!" in general.

Rockstar guy unleashing the dogged Yahtzee to kill Bound in Blood, and finally, "Press X to hide, press triangle to quote Bible, and right trigger to poo pants."

And of course the ever awesome Full and Proper theme song. Purely awesome shots.
Somehow I feel like one of these people are going to make a game involving Yahtzee FPSing FPS's using Saints Row 2. Or something to do with "Yellow Smallstraight; Chimpanzee" (Play on "Red Faction; Guerilla", if you didn't get that).

Congratulations on making a video with a three digit number, that is a milestone in the base ten system. And I can't wait to see what you do for the ever so important 101st video, as it too, is a number, be it important to base ten and digit size or not.

ive been a long time fan of zero punctuation and i hope your future videos are even better.

Congratulations on the 100 Episodes! Looking into getting Call of Juarez now.

Whoooo, to a hundred more Yahtzee!

The montage at the end was good. Filled with so many good old scenes it made my eyes hurt.

Loved the ending. Very Funny.

Ok, I'll admit this one got a few laughs out of me.

Congrats Yahtzee!

The end of the montage was made of win. Now, as per your instructions, I have to go kill myself.

Congrats man! Been watchin' yah for almost a year now. You're my Wednesday afternoon, post-youpOrn tradition! *wink* Hope you stick around for a long time bruthah. Your writing is incredibly sharp and insightful. Thanks for the good times yah spunk-weasel!

Awesome 100th, I've always liked westerns. Thought the joke were really good, too, this week.

... *flrrrpt*

Though I guess I'll take a crack at that game design contest. I think I can pull something off, I'm a decent programmer (EDIT: Wait. Fotch, it's in Flash. I never got the hang of ActionScript. Ah well.)

(And you still haven't reviewed the Conduit yet?)

Booze Zombie:
Like... 100.

Heh, heh. Good review, but surely the pistols can't be that bad?

Indeed, he was pretty exaggerated about it. I played the game mostly with Ray (the dual-wielder) and he's very very effective. Since he dual-wields, he can use two Rangers (the powerful, slow type of revolver) without the speed drawback. Plus he can take more hits, he can throw dynamite (grenades) and carry a gatling gun around. He does chew through your ammo faster than Thomas, and is more likely to get hit since he's the one who gets close to the enemies. Still, in my opinion, my favourite of the two.

To bad that stupid contest is only browser based flash games.....

My favorite part was when the the hooker got molested by the chair in the waiting room.
then again when the green guy was about to get a sphincter stretcher from the other chair.
Juarez: Bound to Rapist Chairs.

Highly entertaining as usual.still the combined equivalent(No I don't know how to spell it,shove off)of simon and a person I give a crap about

Another great review Yahtzee. I'm glad to have followed this series since the beginning.

So I just registered to the Escapist so I can finally post about how awesome ZP is :P Been watching for about the past year now and I gotta say it's one of my favorite web-series ever :D

But now down to business. I know 100 is just a number...but I like numbers. And so I've decided to give the official tallies for his videos.

Number of videos created by Yahtzee: 102
Number of videos on the Escapist: 102
Number of videos on the Escapist created by Yahtzee: 100

So the count to "100" does not include:
-Yahtzee's two videos on YouTube (Fallout and The Darkness)
-The "Year in Review 2008" Video and the Console Rundown repeat on the Escapist

There is also one little thing that is bugging me...
I sat and rewatched the montage at the end (which was EPIC btw) but noticed there is a game missing from the pictures...

THERE'S NOTHING FOR ASSASSIN'S CREED!

Now I haven't actually played AC (because I haven't played a lot of "newer games" tbh :S) but the "I'm an Assassin (Shhh!!)" joke is one of my favorites by Mr. Croshaw. And the lack of a picture for AC just makes the montage incomplete...though the "sewer" pic for Fear PM seems to lag long enough that a pic for AC could easily fit...redo anyone?

Anywho, congratz Yahtzee on 100 (and 2) videos! Let there be many more of them! :D

Woo it's over 99!!

Time for a paradigm shift in Zero Punctuation perhaps?

New intros, new characters, a bigger hat?

This is the very reason I joined The Escapist, to watch these videos. Well, I guess the reason I JOINED was to visit the forums and actually converse with people, but the reason I stayed at first was the Zero Punctuation videos. This, Yahtzee, was a fantastically funny episode that I'm only sad took me a couple days to watch because my desktop has a sucky soundcard and my laptop was busted and in for repairs, now thankfully fixed and returned to loving arms.

The review was funny, informative, and I actually want to play it - and the way Yahtzee said "Juarez" was so damn hilarious I nearly pissed myself after the fourth time he did it. Plus hearing the full ZP theme was pretty nice, never heard the whole thing until this point.

In short: Awesome!

Oh and grats for a number of videos which seems like binary rather than a special occasion. Or if I was going to say seriously: grats on 100 ZP videos, Yahtzee! You still rock.

Now I don't normally reply to the threads on these videos, but I will for today.

Congratulations on your 100th video Yahtzee, I hope there is hundreds more to come!

Now to watch this post get buried under the piles of fanboys...

Happy 100th! Time to watch all of the ZPs in a row to celebrate...XD

crazyhaircut94:
I liked how he celebrated, and now I'm thinking of getting this game. This is probably one of his more funny, lately his jokes have been a little cheap.

I agree, but I think last week had him really get back into his groove. Those thinly veiled insults were hilarious.

like the full theme tune, good movies all 100 of them.

Crap, the game contest has to be in flash. Not everyone knows how to work flash you know. >.> ow well next time when they ask us to use the real mans tool for game development C++. But any ways congratulations on your 100 episode blah blah blah, Indeed its just a number. Also more dick analogies please, I miss those. I loved how he said "juares" all stereotypically. Its hilarious.

/was hoping the montage at the end would contain the gun that had tits and was on fire. Best moment in ZP history.

Thanks for all your hard... "work".

Ah, the full theme song felt just right for the celebration of the 100th ZP episode, and watching all the episodes pass by was a perfect montage of the good ol' times.

And this review was actually quite good.

This was an epically awesome ZP.

Keep up the good work Yahtzee.

Does no one around here, Ben included, know how to count?

This is video 101 under "The Escapist" banner.

Everyone here can even verify it themselves just by counting. But I'll break it down anyways. There are 6 pages, 5 pages with 20 videos (100) and page #6 with only 2. That's 102 videos in total. One video, Console Showdown was repeated once (originally added 08/29/2007 and repeated on 06/11/2008). That was the only repeat and that makes for 101 completely separate and unique videos created by him posted here. I have them all saved to my computer, numbered, and it also comes out to 101. I even just went back and one-by-one compared my Zero Punctuation folder with all 6 pages of videos here on the site. Perfect match, 101 separate videos.

So, I can only assume this must mean one of the earlier videos is being ignored as not counting? So I guess my question now would be: which one? Going out on a limb, I'm thinking maybe video #26 - "Yahtzee Goes to GDC" since that is the only one that does not start with the Zero Punctuation title (though the slate does appear at the begining of each category he covers).

Artlover:
Does no one around here, Ben included, know how to count?

This is video 101 under "The Escapist" banner.

Everyone here can even verify it themselves just by counting. But I'll break it down anyways. There are 6 pages, 5 pages with 20 videos (100) and page #6 with only 2. That's 102 videos in total. One video, Console Showdown was repeated once (originally added 08/29/2007 and repeated on 06/11/2008). That was the only repeat and that makes for 101 completely separate and unique videos created by him posted here. I have them all saved to my computer, numbered, and it also comes out to 101. I even just went back and one-by-one compared my Zero Punctuation folder with all 6 pages of videos here on the site. Perfect match, 101 separate videos.

So, I can only assume this must mean one of the earlier videos is being ignored as not counting? So I guess my question now would be: which one? Going out on a limb, I'm thinking maybe video #26 - "Yahtzee Goes to GDC" since that is the only one that does not start with the Zero Punctuation title (though the slate does appear at the begining of each category he covers).

(face palm) yea we do actually and if you go 10 comments up you'll notice a guy who counts very well. why not read some of the comments first?

I loved the ending "and anyway it's just a number... like 100 *meeep*

And I loved the bit right after the 'proper' theme song

This was all well until the end... where you showed that full theme song with all the old footage of previous reviews, now I want watch all your videos.... again... for the tenth time... But then I remember that your starting videos have an awkward voice to them, so I'll delay this till the next time you make me wanna do this, greedy bastard. 9 times just wasn't enough? Huh?

great review concrats on your 100th review, i would love to be in that compation but i cant make games =( no idea how but hopfully in the not to distant futcher i will be making games for companie's and if you are still reviewing i hope you utterly destroy what i have made cos it would be funny as hell XD

Haha, a shooting game with a first person perspective, someone should come up with a name for that. Great video to mark your 100th.

dubious_wolf:
(face palm) yea we do actually and if you go 10 comments up you'll notice a guy who counts very well. why not read some of the comments first?

Yeah, I saw it. And?

When an admin from The Escapist or Ben (IE: someone who actually does know what the score is) replies, then I'll be more then happy to accept their answer as fact (as it would be). But I'm not going to give any weight to someone who has no apparent affiliation with Zero Punctuation or The Escapist that just joined today and has only that one post for providing the definitive answer. Especially when their math seems a bit sketchy too.

.

Number of videos created by Yahtzee: 102

No, let's try 103. 104 if you want to include the short announcement video of the switchover to The Escapist.

Number of videos on the Escapist: 102

Yes. 101+1 repeat.

Number of videos on the Escapist created by Yahtzee: 100

No, let's try 101. Not sure why he is suggesting that Ben didn't make one of the videos.

So the count to "100" does not include:
-Yahtzee's two videos on YouTube (Fallout and The Darkness)

Obviously.

-The "Year in Review 2008" Video and the Console Rundown repeat on the Escapist

Not sure why he is choosing to exclude "Year in Review 2008". I'm assuming this is the video he claims wasn't created by Ben. Pretty sure Ben himself was the first one to reply apologizing for the clip-show episode and promised something better next time. I didn't see any obvious declaration that it was put together entirely by others and not him. I'm pretty sure he must have had a hand in creating it to some extent. I'd be willing to concede that it could be classified as a "special" and not a regular episode being that it was a clip-show, but that isn't the claim being made.

<face palm>

Mostly Harmless:
What no cake, what kind of 100th episode party is this?

And that is why this episode should have been on Portal.

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