Reliable Source: Internet addiction and Michael Bay

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Reliable Source: Internet addiction and Michael Bay

This week on Reliable Source: internet addiction camps, hardcore gamers and Michael Bay.

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Fatal Beating Therapy did make me chuckle, and I'm impressed by the rest too. Glad this is going to become a regular.

fatal beating therapy was hilarious :P

good work mate :D

This report is insane!

I mean who WOULDN'T want see a Cosby Show movie directed by Michael Bay?

This is now #5 on my list of best features on the Escapist.

Amusing, seems like competition for Something Awful's front page. :)

You Sir are funny. Congratulations.

Not bad. I liked the fatal beating one. It did read like it was kinda rushed. I'll look forward to another installment.

I dare say this round is even better than the previous. Excellent writing, as always, and I'm looking forward to seeing more from it. Good work.

Encore! Encore!!

VoltySquirrel:
This is now #5 on my list of best features on the Escapist.

Awesome, you're #5 on my list too!

wilsonscrazybed:
Reliable Source: Internet addiction and Michael Bay

This week on Reliable Source: internet addiction camps, hardcore gamers and Michael Bay.

Read Full Article

Hey, that's actually really good. +1 props from me!

The scene: Early morning, quiet lake. Me and grampa in his boat, he shows me how to bait the hook. I look in awe as he makes a mighty cast, it sails through the air in slow motion. It hits the water with a violent explosion, water and flaming fish fly into the skies. Two Megan Fox's climb into the boat in slowmotion, specks of water glisten in their awesome cleavage, and begin to seduce gramps. A motorcycle jumps over the boat. The End.

Is there anything Bay is unable to ruin? Michael Bar presents Sesame Street the Movie! *shudder*

Can't Michael Bay just make

and leave my childhood alone?

Just when I thought the Escapist couldn't get any better.

You guys throw this gem out at me. Great job.

I don´t know if cases where minors are beaten to death is exactly FUNNY!

I would call it CRUDE and while the notion "Fatal Beating Therapy" has the same Boot in the Face of Piety as "Endlösung".
There are limits you know.

How ever the shown SARCASM took the point. But Funny? No Sirs.

Let's add your column to my weekly Escapist viewing queue, shall we?

wilsonscrazybed:

VoltySquirrel:
This is now #5 on my list of best features on the Escapist.

Awesome, you're #5 on my list too!

>.>
<.<
>.>
and which list would that be?

"American scientists are already looking at FBT as a cure for other deviant childhood behavior such as hyperactivity (ADD), depression,..."

Huh... Its funny that the Escapist would risk a sever Defamation Lawsuit by publishing this statement.

1. ADD and Depression are not childhood ailments.
2. They are also not "Deviant behaviour", they are mood disorders.
3. While Clinical depression is a milder form of mood disorder, ADD can seriously effect a persons life if not treated. ADD can also cause a far worse mood disorder called Bipolar disorder (which is considered a fatal desease by most countries with proper medicare).

It is extremely prejugdicial (which is also considered illegal in most countries) to make such a claim in jest. Its like publishing racial slurs and expecting it to be "OK".

Would a fatal beating cure MS? Cause these deseases have WAY more incommon with MS then behavioral problems such as stealing or gang affiliation (which yes can point to behavioral problems).

I find it entirely offensive.

Wilson, continue to provide me with much of the same humour and I may get you a present.

joe_dracos:

I find it entirely offensive.

Do not say it... don't say it... ah, the hell with it.

Would you like some cheese with your whine? (Sorry if I offended any alcoholics)

That was brilliant.
I loved the dark humor in the first part the most.

Page 3 does bring up a good point

What if "Platnuim Games" get mixed up with "Platnuim Hits"

I can smell the lawsuits :p

joe_dracos:
"American scientists are already looking at FBT as a cure for other deviant childhood behavior such as hyperactivity (ADD), depression,..."

Huh... Its funny that the Escapist would risk a sever Defamation Lawsuit by publishing this statement.

1. ADD and Depression are not childhood ailments.
2. They are also not "Deviant behaviour", they are mood disorders.
3. While Clinical depression is a milder form of mood disorder, ADD can seriously effect a persons life if not treated. ADD can also cause a far worse mood disorder called Bipolar disorder (which is considered a fatal desease by most countries with proper medicare).

It is extremely prejugdicial (which is also considered illegal in most countries) to make such a claim in jest. Its like publishing racial slurs and expecting it to be "OK".

Would a fatal beating cure MS? Cause these deseases have WAY more incommon with MS then behavioral problems such as stealing or gang affiliation (which yes can point to behavioral problems).

I find it entirely offensive.

The whole thing is meant to be a humerous take on the way many people look at ailments such as gaming addiction and such.. of course depression isn't a behavioral disorder, but the fun of the article is meant to be about how people often perceive such ailments.

And no one is going to risk any kind of legal action with this. I think it's kinda taking reasonable complaining a little far.

woah! thanks for the headsup on Platinum Games :D Dracos I think will benefit from some FBT right about now :D ;)

AeroZeppelinSevenfold:
Just when I thought the Escapist couldn't get any better.

You guys throw this gem out at me. Great job.

Impressive!
Fatal Beating Therapy' was appreciated....:D

lewiswhitling:
The whole thing is meant to be a humerous take on the way many people look at ailments such as gaming addiction and such.. of course depression isn't a behavioral disorder, but the fun of the article is meant to be about how people often perceive such ailments.

And no one is going to risk any kind of legal action with this. I think it's kinda taking reasonable complaining a little far.

my complaint isn't about the entire article... though I am getting sick of hearing "Micheal Bay sucks" but thats something I tend to ignore. My problem is with the one line. That is the focus of my complaint. And while I'm not threatening legal action I know several people in the health community that will not take it as lightly as I have. I'm not suggesting that I consider this reaction light, its just 1 in 5 of the escapists readers are going to be afflicted with a mood disorder (it PLAGUES my family), while most will be minor and temporary, there still is several that are serious such as those I have mentioned.

Bullshit, it's well known the next Michael Bay movie will be ALF: Revenge of the Kittens.

Aside from his movie projects, Michael Bay has been contracted to ruin other more personal experiences like your first kiss and that time you and your dad went out fishing and he gave you your first beer.

"Um... Dad? I don't remember the tackle box exploding when we did that."

"No, but it would've been AWESOME!"

"Yeah, you're right! Hey, pass me a beer."

"Sure."

KABOOM

This has been a Michael Bay production.

I'm not sure how Micheal Bay can ruin my childhood anymore really.

Nice work, FBTFTW.

Yeah, definitely checking this every time it comes out now. Well done wilson.

Although I still spend most days hoping against hope for another addition of Crazy Moderator Theatre.

tehroc:
The scene: Early morning, quiet lake. Me and grampa in his boat, he shows me how to bait the hook. I look in awe as he makes a mighty cast, it sails through the air in slow motion. It hits the water with a violent explosion, water and flaming fish fly into the skies. Two Megan Fox's climb into the boat in slowmotion, specks of water glisten in their awesome cleavage, and begin to seduce gramps. A motorcycle jumps over the boat. The End.

No fighter planes involved?

Is this a new feature? I want to see more.

Armitage Shanks:
Yeah, definitely checking this every time it comes out now. Well done wilson.

Although I still spend most days hoping against hope for another addition of Crazy Moderator Theatre.

tehroc:
The scene: Early morning, quiet lake. Me and grampa in his boat, he shows me how to bait the hook. I look in awe as he makes a mighty cast, it sails through the air in slow motion. It hits the water with a violent explosion, water and flaming fish fly into the skies. Two Megan Fox's climb into the boat in slowmotion, specks of water glisten in their awesome cleavage, and begin to seduce gramps. A motorcycle jumps over the boat. The End.

No fighter planes involved?

You've got to save something for the sequel.

joe_dracos:

my complaint isn't about the entire article... though I am getting sick of hearing "Micheal Bay sucks" but thats something I tend to ignore. My problem is with the one line. That is the focus of my complaint. And while I'm not threatening legal action I know several people in the health community that will not take it as lightly as I have. I'm not suggesting that I consider this reaction light, its just 1 in 5 of the escapists readers are going to be afflicted with a mood disorder (it PLAGUES my family), while most will be minor and temporary, there still is several that are serious such as those I have mentioned.

I think you missed the point of this. This is slanted humor, it is parody. This is like The Escapist version of 'The Onion'. I think you are reading into this too much. It is not real news, it is done in jest.

I thought this was brilliant and I hope to see more of this. Also thanks for the tips on how to get women over to play Halo, and other Platinum Hits! (That's sarcasm, really...)

Bravo sir, Bravo!

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