Zero Punctuation: Dragon Age: Origins

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I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Actually, he liked it.

I wonder what the follow up extra punctuation will be like. I know Yahtzee is a busy man, and I've been playing this game for about 60 hours and I just now feel like I'm reaching the end. I'd like to hear his thoughts on the story but I'm not sure he's up for the task of finishing it through to its conclusion.

Awesome review it was actually not useless drivel like the majority of the other random reviews, might actually try this game out.

AcacianLeaves:

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Actually, he liked it.

I wonder what the follow up extra punctuation will be like. I know Yahtzee is a busy man, and I've been playing this game for about 60 hours and I just now feel like I'm reaching the end. I'd like to hear his thoughts on the story but I'm not sure he's up for the task of finishing it through to its conclusion.

Really? What a shock!!! I may actually have to watch that review. I haven't seen a Zero Punctuation review that was even remotely positive for so long.

Thanks!

dukethepcdr:

AcacianLeaves:

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Actually, he liked it.

I wonder what the follow up extra punctuation will be like. I know Yahtzee is a busy man, and I've been playing this game for about 60 hours and I just now feel like I'm reaching the end. I'd like to hear his thoughts on the story but I'm not sure he's up for the task of finishing it through to its conclusion.

Really? What a shock!!! I may actually have to watch that review. I haven't seen a Zero Punctuation review that was even remotely positive for so long.

Thanks!

Okay, I watched it. I guess the fact that it didn't bore him to death after playing it a long time qualifies as "liking" the game. He still tore it to shreds and made fun of pretty much ever aspect of it and of the people who like fantasy RPGs. He also continues to resort to cussing and disgusting references to things that people under the age of 18 shouldn't be hearing or seeing (adults shouldn't rot their brains with it either for that matter).

I now resume my boycott of Zero Punctuation. Thanks for the reminder of why I don't like those video "reviews".

dukethepcdr:

dukethepcdr:

AcacianLeaves:

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Actually, he liked it.

I wonder what the follow up extra punctuation will be like. I know Yahtzee is a busy man, and I've been playing this game for about 60 hours and I just now feel like I'm reaching the end. I'd like to hear his thoughts on the story but I'm not sure he's up for the task of finishing it through to its conclusion.

Really? What a shock!!! I may actually have to watch that review. I haven't seen a Zero Punctuation review that was even remotely positive for so long.

Thanks!

Okay, I watched it. I guess the fact that it didn't bore him to death after playing it a long time qualifies as "liking" the game. He still tore it to shreds and made fun of pretty much ever aspect of it and of the people who like fantasy RPGs. He also continues to resort to cussing and disgusting references to things that people under the age of 18 shouldn't be hearing or seeing (adults shouldn't rot their brains with it either for that matter).

I now resume my boycott of Zero Punctuation. Thanks for the reminder of why I don't like those video "reviews".

Wow this is grey right here.

@Topic
Anyway Yahtzee is actually making a lot of sense in his complaints here. Most RPGs is very very tolkien (mind you Lord of the Rings is a complete and utter rip off of norse mythology elves and everything even down to the mother fucking ring).

But there is something about BioWare RPGs that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. Compared to Bethesda that mostly makes me feel awkward. Fallout 3 is ok but not a real Fallout. It's true.

Why are these threads usually turn into flame wars between people whe diasgree with yahtzee and people who agree with yahtzee

So all that lame "game contest" advertising stuck onto the end of videos for months was all for 15 seconds of vague reviewing? Sounds like The Escapist alright.

i saw the end at 25 hours in... it's not rocket science you see most of the map straight away.

Tiny world all condensed into little maps, Bioware really don't do sandboxed RPGS. (Although Mass Effect felt 100% better than this piece of garbage). Dialogue would have been better if they had hired decent writers; Do you hear that? - Mr Tolkein rolling in his grave.

Graphics were laudable, plus the fact you actually get an NPC at your camp beginning you to help them ONLY if you download premium content, with just a few clicks. You're kidding me? no, he's really there.

Then there's the Bugs, no where near as bad as a certain KOTOR or worse Bethedsa's joke of Fallout 3, who for some reason managed to create MORE bugs with each edition they shipped out. (i'm serious go from Xbox, PC to the PS3 version and scratch your freaking head).

Anyway where was i... oh yeah, the bugs, the worst one being the little exploit where you can go to level 20 within the first 30 minutes of the game. Due to the fact the guy gives XP for the blood (3 vials.. with me) but as long as you don't pick up the other thing (spawning the "slut" of the game) you can keep handing in the same vials of blood for the XP. Since XP doesn't change per level (bizare for an RPG) nor do you really feel that much powerful, just get better abilities.

How that got through testing.. i'll never know and that's the rub, the game feels like it was forced out by EA more quickly than sex with jessica alba because you were "tired" and "excited". This was probably to make way for more work on Mass Effect 2 (looks great) and the Star Wars MMO Beta.

Dragons Age has suffered, sure we'll get some DLC content... but it'll still feel like they missed out on so much, they could have optimised the engine, made loading times less... even created better facial animations so they don't all look constapated and walk like we went back in time to the first "ghost recon" on the xbox.

at least the actors are okay, well except the dwarfs.. the dwarfs all sound like fat humans.

it feels unfinished, playing it on normal it'll take you 40 hours... easy will take 10 hours off that. The best NPC characters are the ones who talk a lot.. i like alistair, the french girl and shale (a female dwarf of all things).

but it was traded in, in less than a week because i had mostly done everything and seen almost all the endings, bar one where you let the evil SOB actually LIVE. come on. (you'll KILL a lot of dragons, the developers are in the school, when in doubt make the boss a dragon - you'll kill 3 of the big things in the game; shapeshifter, cult "leader" and the end "demon")

couldn't make it through all the starting origins though except human and mage. Funny how the racism all but disppears when you enter the elven part of the city as a human ;) it's like the writers got bored half way... and went "meh".

oh and help the girl bartender, and the other chick with cash... you even get lines at the end of what happens to them. Only characters i actually cared about what happens... the rest are a dime a dozen. (alistair forgets all about helping his sister).

Go buy Mass Effect, better game.. half the price ;) thank god for unchartered 2, better than this pile of ****. Jade Empire was worse though.

Wonder if he'll ever review World of Goo. That game seems right up his alley as to something he would like.

dukethepcdr:

AcacianLeaves:

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Actually, he liked it.

I wonder what the follow up extra punctuation will be like. I know Yahtzee is a busy man, and I've been playing this game for about 60 hours and I just now feel like I'm reaching the end. I'd like to hear his thoughts on the story but I'm not sure he's up for the task of finishing it through to its conclusion.

Really? What a shock!!! I may actually have to watch that review. I haven't seen a Zero Punctuation review that was even remotely positive for so long.

Thanks!

Stop being such an idiot, seriously.
There's a billion and one super positive reviews by all the big names that just rip off each other's reviews/main points/scores which you can read to feel all better about yourself.

I'm not defending other reviewers , but whats the matter with giving positive reviews? Giving out a lot of negative reviews(not trying to bash yahtzee) is be annoying to some just as giving out a lot of positive reviews can be annoying.

Well that was somewhat of an oversimplification of Bioware RPGs Yahtzee, but accurate none the less. I'm guessing you were playing one of the console versions since you talked about radial menus and shit which aren't present in the PC version.

The only reason anyone watches Zero Punctuation is because Yahtzee is funny. The only reason Yahtzee is funny is because he rips on games. These aren't legitimate reviews to actually be taken into account when one considers buying a game. These are solely for comedic value (though he does often include legitimate points in his "reviews"). I wish people would stop taking him so seriously. Yahtzee is just a comedian. If you do not find him funny, then do not watch his videos. That is all.

The video this week was quite funny. Though I don't think that the humans were the biggest assholes. Every race was equal in their assholery; it's just that there are more humans than any other race and therefore humans are merely able to do more asshole-type stuff. I will say no more because I don't want to spoil anything.

WickedSkin:
Anyway Yahtzee is actually making a lot of sense in his complaints here. Most RPGs is very very tolkien (mind you Lord of the Rings is a complete and utter rip off of norse mythology elves and everything even down to the mother fucking ring).

Not really. While a lot of elements were inspired by Germanic mythology, it's hardly a direct ripoff, since many things were altered and tweaked to fit Tolkien. The two rings are very different in powers, abilities and general make-up.

Something I've noticed a lot when it comes to fantasy is people ascribing most of the typical "Elf" and "Dwarf" cliches to Tolkien. Tolkien's elves were not all nature-loving, bow-stringing, haughty, holier-than-thou peaceniks: only the few seen in Lord of the Rings could possibly fit that description, and they only make a tiny percentage of the Elvish people. Tolkien's dwarves aren't Scottish, wine-guzzling drunkards either, they're more like the Hebrews than anything else. Most of the actual Elf & Dwarf stereotypes can be blamed on Dungeons & Dragons.

The sad thing about modern fantasy is before D&D, fantasy was innovative, and no two worlds were alike. Compare D&D to, say, the Hyborian Age of Conan: no parahuman races like elves or dwarves ruling nations next to humans, no dark lords with armies of subhuman monsters, magic is subtle & mysterious. Then compare both to Dunsany's Pegana, Lovecraft's Dreamlands, Clark Ashton Smith's Zothique and Poseidonis, Edgar Rice Burrough's Barsoom and Pellucidar, Leigh Brackett's solar system, Jack Vance's Dying Earth, A. Merritt's setting for "The Ship of Ishtar"...

Even after Tolkien & D&D, there are plenty of fantasy universes that don't ascribe to the D&D type. Le Guin's Earthsea, Moorcock's Elric universe, Wolfe's Urth, and more. There's no reason for a fantasy game to rely on the Elf/Dwarf/Dragon/Orc/Dark Lord crutch other than to function as exactly that - a crutch.

That was the best review I've seen from him in a while, bravo.

Jannycats:
I can't believe that he complained that the game is too long. Wtf, I thought that playing a short game was bad and a reasonably-sized one was too boring. You can't really win with Yahtzee can you?

No, you can't.

dukethepcdr:
Okay, I watched it. I guess the fact that it didn't bore him to death after playing it a long time qualifies as "liking" the game. He still tore it to shreds and made fun of pretty much ever aspect of it and of the people who like fantasy RPGs.

Since when has Yahtzee ever not found something to complain about in a game (since Portal)? And it's his style not to forgive flaws. This is what a positive review from Yahtzee sounds like. You're being thin-skinned.

dukethepcdr:
I now resume my boycott of Zero Punctuation. Thanks for the reminder of why I don't like those video "reviews".

Oh, shit, you showed him!

Raykuza:
The only reason anyone watches Zero Punctuation is because Yahtzee is and some more words

Is this just a troll these days or...

Watch this video and the other three parts of the speech and tell me Yahtzee is just a comedian.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_rCbrbzYLw

Yahtzee, you call 'em as they are. Great review, if not a little crude at times, but definitely fair.

MaxTheReaper:

stevec666:

RyoScar:
STOP SAYING FIRST! YOU DON'T NEED TO SAY IT! WE CAN SEE YOU ARE!

but now i KNOW, you know im first :P

We also know you're an obnoxious idiot.

I'm surprised Yahtzee is reviewing an RPG, though.
I loved the end, too.

Actually, the entire rant was pretty damn good, which is nice.

Sixteen THOUSAND posts in less than a year. My friend, you need to put away the keyboard for a while.

the video has negative views on the game but the amusing thing is about 80% of them have nothing to do with the game and more with the genre

the problem with some reviews is people plain dont like playing certain games not sure bout yahtzee but this is the first RPG my mate has ever been able to stand for more than 5hours although hes not sure why lol

Ice Storm:

Sixteen THOUSAND posts in less than a year. My friend, you need to put away the keyboard for a while.

It's 80 degrees out.
In the middle of Winter.
In the middle of the night.

No way am I going out there.

feather240:

TheNamlessGuy:

stevec666:
FIRST :)

...no

OT: "So is the Dragon Age like the Bronze Age, and now everything is made out of dragons?"
That right there made my day

I wonder how they would implement that. The escapist review said that dragons would kill you most of the time so all those pants must be worth a fortune or the dragons control the entire economy from a doom fortress.

I don't know, most of my characters by the end of the game were armed with weapons made from the bones of dragons and garbed in armor derived from dragons in some way. And, since the dragon based goods were the best in the game, it stands to reason that Yahtzee's assertion might be correct.

dukethepcdr:

I now resume my boycott of Zero Punctuation. Thanks for the reminder of why I don't like those video "reviews".

First: He's a critic, they highlight negitive points in their reviews, it's kinda what a critic does. It's like complaing that a cat isn't a dog, it's not suppost to be.

Second: How are these videos not reviews?

Seriously, why are they not reviews?

Asking why elves use bows is like asking why jews have funny circular hats.

THEY JUST DO.

that was awesome very funny.

Huh wow. He mentioned Otherkin. That was surprising that he has enough modern cultural knowledge to realize that exists. Interesting! So anyone look up the concept and have a response? *goes to check the rest of the thread to see if anyone has*


Very funny review, he is right that since Tolkien almost every fantasy game/book/movie share a lot of elements when it comes to elves or dwarves etc.

Heh, the "FIRST!" people never stop, I don't quite see the point anymore, but oh well, never will I comprehend the internet fool.

To all you whiners: Yahtzee explained why he's so harsh in the Bioshock review way back when. Look at it again!

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/4-BioShock

I was wondering how he was going to review a game he only gets a week to play but that is touted to have 60+ hours of gameplay.

Good episode :) LOL'd @ cocksucking manual

Is there anywhere we can try out the Stonking winners & runners up?

gavinfoxx:
Huh wow. He mentioned Otherkin. That was surprising that he has enough modern cultural knowledge to realize that exists. Interesting! So anyone look up the concept and have a response?

Loonies.

It's comedy guys. Yahtzee being positive all the time would not be funny. Don't take his videos so damn seriously, in the end of the day it's your opinion of the game that matters. Not his or mine or someone else's. Yours.

Fronzel:

gavinfoxx:
Huh wow. He mentioned Otherkin. That was surprising that he has enough modern cultural knowledge to realize that exists. Interesting! So anyone look up the concept and have a response?

Loonies.

You mean Loonies by furry standards. That's how loony they are.

dukethepcdr:

I now resume my boycott of Zero Punctuation.

Because we all know how well the last boycott of something massively popular went.

Already posted here, but just wanted to say that this review has really been holding up well with me. Either this or Duke Nukem Forever is my favourite. So many of his references to Fantasy nerds really hit home with me. I love Bioware.

dukethepcdr:
I can't bring myself to even watch the 'review'. I've grown tired of Yahtzee ripping everything (except his own games and ones almost like them) to shreds.

Now you just sound sadly uniformed. Just watch the review! If you grow tired of it, some people here can sympathize!

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