Stolen Pixels #150: +2 Shoes of Floppiness

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Stolen Pixels #150: +2 Shoes of Floppiness

Just once, it'd be nice to play through an RPG looking like an adventurer, and not a dumpster-diver.

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"We got all this stuff from the last town we helped."

After we kicked their asses for making fun of our fashion!

This has always bothered me about rpg's for ages! Why cant I wear what I want, when I want, and still be optimal? Prison sequences are of course excluded from this complaint.

Great to see another DA:O comic, always brightens up my day. ^_^

I agree on the whole helmets/hats deal, they were so nasty that I refused to use them at all. Same about the female Dalish armor, how can that protect you when it exposes your whole tummy? I had no idea that the dudes can wear that skirt thing though...

Yeah my rogue in Dragon Age: Origins is still wearing the Executioner Helmet(+20 Stamina) because it's the only graphic I could stomach seeing on him all the time.

As much as I would love to see more games implement double gear set systems or allow for dying your gear to at least match colors - I really have to wonder what was going through the artists heads when they made some of these models. You go through all the trouble of crafting this dark gritty story, just to be pulled out of it every time you see your character wearing some ridiculously silly hat.

One drawback I have found with the double set method though, is you end up looking pretty much exactly the same the whole time. You keep finding new and shinier loot, but because it looks terrible you end up appearing in the same clothes for huge stretches of time - which takes some of the fun out of finding new gear. Although it does add this strange meta option to loot finding where every piece of armor is looked at for it's aesthetic potential for your appearance set in addition to it's actual stats.

Lord of the Rings Online probably had the best overall system for handling this. It was double set with the ability to dye items, equip other clothing accessories and you had multiple appearance sets you could swap between. You still ran into the same trapping of looking largely the same most of the time, but at least you had a pretty wide variety to customize from.

It's a rule about videogaming - The stupider and more impractical your character looks, the better you are.

Winged helmets aren't awesome?! Oh noes! Apparently my life has been a lie all this time. While we're talking about armor though, am I the only one who's had the Blood Dragon armor not render properly for a female character? The entire chest section where the dragon is supposed to display shows up almost flat black, which I thought might have been a temporary rendering error but it just won't go away.

The armor looked fine on my male character (for a given definition of fine anyways, I was so pissed that it had better stats than Warden Commander armor because that was sweet looking).

WoW had a start to the right idea. Clan tunics. They were worn over your chest armour, displaying a crest. Expand the idea so it's not just a little logo, but a whole customizable cloth tunic that covers your entire chest armour. And leggings too.

These kinds of things not only aided in recognizing what "side" you were on, or "who" you were, they also helped protect the armour from the elements.

They actually look kind of cool (except the hat of the first guy). I like when my gear is random and i never know how I'm going to look later in the game.
But i hate to wear black clothing when I'm evil and white when I'm a mage, where's the logic in that?

My guy has the full Blood Dragon armor set, which is funny, because it's got glowing red eyes.
Plus he's got Ageless. (a big, BIG sword)
I don't think anyone would make fun of him, especially not after eating the High Dragon of Haven alive.

Two Hours into Dragon Age i already know what Shamus is saying

:(

On the flipside though, other helmets in DA:O are bad-ass. Case in point: The Rock-Knocker (+50 Stamina) and other helmets of that design. The Juggernaut helmet (which my main had at the end) was also amazing.

Haha-yeah this is definitely an issue in most RPGs.

Thankfully there is a mod that unequips the helmets in all situations but re-equips them in battle.

Now I can actually get the benifit of them without looking like a dumbass.

Ryuk2:

But i hate to wear black clothing when I'm evil and white when I'm a mage, where's the logic in that?

What do you mean? Evil people wear black because it makes them harder to spot so other people can't see their evil deeds.

I'm evil and I wear black all the time.

I'm siding with Alistair here. Winged helms are awesome.

Winged helmets not awesome? I wholeheartedly disagree.

While I do find some of the helmets and outfits to look goofy, I actually like the constant changing of armor. It makes me think of Vikings and such, a fitting throwback considering the fantasy setting. Watch a film like The 13th Warrior and you'll see one character with a Spanish helmet and completely mismatched studded armor, while another has a thick fur while donning a French helm. Granted it all looks practical in terms of warfare, unlike the Dalish armor on females, but it gives this feeling of "I've been anywhere and everywhere". Which is how an adventurer should feel.

That said, I think the most goofy aspect of changing outfits was the constant fluctuation in cup sizes on the females. I'm typically not one to ogle a 3-D model, but I swear Leliana went from a D-Cup in her conservative robes when I first got her to a C when I put her in leather armor. This change occurred for Morrigan rather often as well.

I wonder if it would have been better for them to try and fit the armor model over preset character dimensions or not?

Actually, plate mail tended to look more odd on non-dwarven characters as well. The huge shoulder pads somehow fit for the dwarves since they are so stout, but when I put some on Alistair and Sten it looked really awkward. So wide up top, but then so scrawny at the legs.

Tiamat666:

Ryuk2:

But i hate to wear black clothing when I'm evil and white when I'm a mage, where's the logic in that?

What do you mean? Evil people wear black because it makes them harder to spot so other people can't see their evil deeds.

I'm evil and I wear black all the time.

Real evil people try to look like good people. But i don't see why black is supposed to be evil color. I wear black and white clothing, what does that say about me? I have split personality between evil and good? Why can't evil people in games be white like that white guy from Lord of the rings? (i don't remember he's name, but he was completely white)
p.s are all black people evil by Dragon age standarts? 0_o

They look like they're suffering from a common RPG gear appearance dilemma known as "Outland Quest Green Syndrome."

Ryuk2:

Real evil people try to look like good people.

Yes, perhaps you are right. Really, masterfully evil people would appear to be good people.

But for the rest of us evil guys, we want others to immediately recognize us as evil and be very afraid of us. That makes us feel all smug and cozy inside.

Tiamat666:

Ryuk2:

Real evil people try to look like good people.

Yes, perhaps you are right. Really, masterfully evil people would appear to be good people.

But for the rest of us evil guys, we want others to immediately recognize us as evil and be very afraid of us. That makes us feel all smug and cozy inside.

No, that makes you and ''edgy'' posser ( or how it is called). When you give yourself a label (like emo, evil, gamer and others) you are a posser. You just want to look cool and ''edgy''. If you are evil, you will never go around saying ''Hey, i'm evil'', while ''evil'' is recognized by deeds not words and clothes.

Ryuk2:

Tiamat666:

Ryuk2:

Real evil people try to look like good people.

Yes, perhaps you are right. Really, masterfully evil people would appear to be good people.

But for the rest of us evil guys, we want others to immediately recognize us as evil and be very afraid of us. That makes us feel all smug and cozy inside.

No, that makes you and ''edgy'' posser ( or how it is called). When you give yourself a label (like emo, evil, gamer and others) you are a posser. You just want to look cool and ''edgy''. If you are evil, you will never go around saying ''Hey, i'm evil'', while ''evil'' is recognized by deeds not words and clothes.

You're faulting someone for being a poser IN A VIDEOGAME?

All videogame players are posers. You're pretending to be Mario? You're not really Mario. Link? You're not him either. You're also not Cmdr Shepard, Master Chief, Gordon Freeman, a Jedi, or any of the other thousands of characters you can be in a game.

You're a person on a couch pretending to be something more glamorous than that. It's probably not wise to go around making fun of the other things other people pretend to be from their couches.

"I really like the approach that newer MMOs are taking with gear, in that you can have one set of clothing that defines how you look, and another set of stuff that is your actual protective gear. "

Newer MMOs? I'm sorry, this was already in Anarchy Online. 3 YEARS before WoW launched.

Shamus Young:

You're faulting someone for being a poser IN A VIDEOGAME?

All videogame players are posers. You're pretending to be Mario? You're not really Mario. Link? You're not him either. You're also not Cmdr Shepard, Master Chief, Gordon Freeman, a Jedi, or any of the other thousands of characters you can be in a game.

You're a person on a couch pretending to be something more glamorous than that. It's probably not wise to go around making fun of the other things other people pretend to be from their couches.

I think that he's talking about how evil he is in real life. As he didn't say that he's talking about game, i'm very sure he's talking about real life. He said ''I'm evil and I wear black all the time'', not ''I'm evil IN GAMES and i wear black all the time IN GAMES''. When you're evil in games, you are forced to wear black so it would be kind of weird if someone said that he's wearing black in games because he's evil. We all do when we play as evil characters.
p.s if someone thinks that I'm arguing and i'm mad - no, I'm just sharing opinions on internet because I'm bored.

Undead Dragon King:
On the flipside though, other helmets in DA:O are bad-ass. Case in point: The Rock-Knocker (+50 Stamina) and other helmets of that design. The Juggernaut helmet (which my main had at the end) was also amazing.

Rock knocker sounds like it should have been in one of those epic movie style spoofs. It does sound like the best armour ever.

My biggest wardrobe gripe is that everyone seems to buy their pants (Im from the UK so I'm talking underware) from the same store...

Near the end of the game my party started to look more awesome. Oghren wearing full "Legion of the Dead" armor, Alistair wearing Grey Warden Commander armor and a "Juggernaut Helmet" - and while Sten had full dragon scale heavy armor...I still have him wear that stupidly ugly bronze helmet of honnleath which just so happens to have EXCELLENT ENCHANTMENTS...ugh it's all about sacrifice I suppose- and Shale now doesn't have those stupid chipped crystals anymore.

All my main characters still look stupid.

The helms in Dragon Age really are horrible! I was disappointed when I couldn't find an option to disable them.

I've always hated the mismatched look of gear in MMORPGs as well. By the time you reach the endgame, you might have a complete set of gear that looks nice. But for the 50+ levels before that? You look like a little kid playing dressup in mommy and daddy's closet.

It is sad that you want to keep a crap piece of armor because it looks good. I hate it when they make me choose between looking good or boosting my stats.

GirlGamer77:
The helms in Dragon Age really are horrible! I was disappointed when I couldn't find an option to disable them.

I've always hated the mismatched look of gear in MMORPGs as well. By the time you reach the endgame, you might have a complete set of gear that looks nice. But for the 50+ levels before that? You look like a little kid playing dressup in mommy and daddy's closet.

If you have the PC version (you lucky SOB if you do) there is a mod for that.

http://www.dragonagenexus.com/downloads/file.php?id=202

squid5580:
It is sad that you want to keep a crap piece of armor because it looks good. I hate it when they make me choose between looking good or boosting my stats.

GirlGamer77:
The helms in Dragon Age really are horrible! I was disappointed when I couldn't find an option to disable them.

I've always hated the mismatched look of gear in MMORPGs as well. By the time you reach the endgame, you might have a complete set of gear that looks nice. But for the 50+ levels before that? You look like a little kid playing dressup in mommy and daddy's closet.

If you have the PC version (you lucky SOB if you do) there is a mod for that.

http://www.dragonagenexus.com/downloads/file.php?id=202

Nope, I have the Xbox version. Best Buy had a buy one, get one half off sale. Although, hindsight being 20/20, I wish I'd preordered the PC version instead. Still a great game though!

BlueInkAlchemist:
"We got all this stuff from the last town we helped."

After we kicked their asses for making fun of our fashion!

Rawr!!!

GirlGamer77:

squid5580:
It is sad that you want to keep a crap piece of armor because it looks good. I hate it when they make me choose between looking good or boosting my stats.

GirlGamer77:
The helms in Dragon Age really are horrible! I was disappointed when I couldn't find an option to disable them.

I've always hated the mismatched look of gear in MMORPGs as well. By the time you reach the endgame, you might have a complete set of gear that looks nice. But for the 50+ levels before that? You look like a little kid playing dressup in mommy and daddy's closet.

If you have the PC version (you lucky SOB if you do) there is a mod for that.

http://www.dragonagenexus.com/downloads/file.php?id=202

Nope, I have the Xbox version. Best Buy had a buy one, get one half off sale. Although, hindsight being 20/20, I wish I'd preordered the PC version instead. Still a great game though!

True Dat! First game in a very long time that made me wish I had gotten the PC version instead. Just for th ability to pull out the camera more. Although my achievement addiction won out :(

i whole heartily agree with the sentiment of this article. This is why i like playing Runes of Magic or Lord of the Rings Online. They give you the option to change the aesthetics of the armor/cloth you wear. Look good and still have bad ass stats. Dragon Age...yeah really need to add a Pants or leg slot. I mean Head hands torso and feet doesn't exactly over everything does it ~points at Dunce cap wearing man in skirt~

Esh so picky. Go help your own damn town if youre going to me so judgmental!

GirlGamer77:
The helms in Dragon Age really are horrible! I was disappointed when I couldn't find an option to disable them.

I've always hated the mismatched look of gear in MMORPGs as well. By the time you reach the endgame, you might have a complete set of gear that looks nice. But for the 50+ levels before that? You look like a little kid playing dressup in mommy and daddy's closet.

I find that in some games, the opposite is true. WoW for example: a lot of the low-level armor looks pretty decent and normal, but the higher level stuff is just so much oversized and impractical decorative crap.

Still, this seems to be more of the exception than the rule. I still recall in the beginning levels of KotOR having Carth in a set of bright pink/purple armor simply because it was the best available at the time.

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