Escapist News Network: The Future of Sex

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And my yearly routine gets back in place with some good old comedy.

Gay sex isn't illegal in the United States...I'd assume you guys were talking about Canada, seeing as you live there, but I am 99% sure that it's not illegal there either, and besides, don't you call your country's divisions provinces, not states?

Bwahahahaha!!!
First time I laughed at Enn, but that was freaking hilarious.... the reactions almost made me fall off the chair!

orannis62:

WickedSkin:
Bestiality has already been done in gaming! Mass Effect!

Considering that Asari are aliens (what I think you're referring to), not animals, Xenophilia might be better.

...god, I can't believe I'm thinking about that.

Bestiality is also equal to savageness and words alike, an angry mob can be bestial, so xenophilia makes sense. Xeno meaning stranger... Does that mean everyone who ever fucked a stranger (you've been to nightclubs people, you all did it!) is a xenophile? An animal is sure to be a stranger. So bestiality should be changed to xenophilia. Xenophilia is an awesome word.

Oh and my joke was calling sex with Asari bestiality, because bestiality, is having sex with a "lesser animal/being(?)".. you know.. like humans are the master race... hur hur. Not that funny and a tad far-fetched but I'm happy with it. If it's not human it's an animal! MOHAHA!

Indeed, rice pudding is cheaper than eagle semen.
And that was hilarious.

Wonderful, you guys. Now that's the proper way to respond to controversy--by stepping it up!

Damn right we're making contact this year.

But not with your animals. That's just... ah...

SuperMse:
Gay sex isn't illegal in the United States...I'd assume you guys were talking about Canada, seeing as you live there, but I am 99% sure that it's not illegal there either, and besides, don't you call your country's divisions provinces, not states?

We did mean States because, yes, we have Provinces in Canada.

That particular line was a little hazy, I admit. We weren't saying that homosexual sex per se is illegal, but in some states I'm fairly that butt sex is illegal. Or sodomy, as it's called when referred to in said laws.
Granted, straight couples can engage in sodomy as well, but I abstracted the truth for the sake of comedy. It won't happen again.*

*Yes it will.

I like how serious that dude was when mentioning if there were any other reasons you'd name a dog 'Dog meat' unless it was meant for beastiality.
come to think of it, Beastiality should be a new fatality in Mortal Kombat.

GrahamS:

SuperMse:
Gay sex isn't illegal in the United States...I'd assume you guys were talking about Canada, seeing as you live there, but I am 99% sure that it's not illegal there either, and besides, don't you call your country's divisions provinces, not states?

We did mean States because, yes, we have Provinces in Canada.

That particular line was a little hazy, I admit. We weren't saying that homosexual sex per se is illegal, but in some states I'm fairly that butt sex is illegal. Or sodomy, as it's called when referred to in said laws.
Granted, straight couples can engage in sodomy as well, but I abstracted the truth for the sake of comedy. It won't happen again.*

*Yes it will.

I'd expect nothing less.

Great episode guys, Alex did an awesome job, he did a great job at being sincere about the story and it worked wonderfully.

Also, mmmm rice pudding.

Anyone else notice the plush animals mounting on the shelf behind the bestial guy?

I C WHAT U DID THAR!

Also, Rule 46: There is Furry Porn of it.

Hilarious Episode.

We will make contact this year, with some sick new hardware and games!

Oh no, watch out for the conservatives -they're gonna blow!

Though seriously I just dont see how people can make the jump from homosexuality to bestiality. Its a slippery slope argument brought up by every single person I have ever met who opposes gay rights. Its getting kinda old.

You know what should instead come after homosexuality? Aliens. And once we've done aliens we should do cyborgs - then robots. Bestiality? Come on, my toaster's hotter than any dog...

HOT!

My favorite ENN so far! The beanie babies on the bookshelf were a nice touch as well.

Well it would have made Fable II more interesting...

the Sirfragsalot.com caption on the mario gameplay.

PLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG

ROFL!
[As to the beastiality portion:] Wow. I just don't have anything else say. Excuse me while I go clean my ear sockets with a drill.

I wonder if it's been pointed out that laws against gay sex have been ruled unconstitutional here in the U.S. and if those laws are still on the books they can't be enforced.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_v._Texas

Oh and the guy's wrong the totem pole/slippery slope of sex in games (not counting porno games which probably have the totem pole completely covered in some weird sticky goo) goes as follows.

Hetero Sex
Homo Sex
Masturbation
Group Sex
Incest (with adults)
Rape
Necrophilia
Fetishes you would find on shock sites
Bestiality
Pedophilia

That is this is the order that they will gradually seep into gaming (and it's always possible for it to come to a halt at any one level).

Or at least that's what an aristocrat told me *cough*

I wish I hadn't started at that totem poll, now I keep thinking of more things that need to be added there.

Macgyvercas:
First ENN of 2010, fresh onto the ice, takes the puck down the rink, bluffs the defenders, he shoots...HE SCORES!

That was awesome, eh?

I think this should be filed under 'trying too hard to be Canadian'.

Father Time:

Macgyvercas:
First ENN of 2010, fresh onto the ice, takes the puck down the rink, bluffs the defenders, he shoots...HE SCORES!

That was awesome, eh?

I think this should be filed under 'trying too hard to be Canadian'.

Okay, ya caught me. But is there really a problem with trying to be Canadian? I spend most of my time offline trying to be British and no one seems to care.

Macgyvercas:

Father Time:

Macgyvercas:
First ENN of 2010, fresh onto the ice, takes the puck down the rink, bluffs the defenders, he shoots...HE SCORES!

That was awesome, eh?

I think this should be filed under 'trying too hard to be Canadian'.

Okay, ya caught me. But is there really a problem with trying to be Canadian? I spend most of my time offline trying to be British and no one seems to care.

Not really a problem although you did get my hopes up of finding a hockey fan only to let me down that it's just another Canada fan *cue blame Canada*, so I thought I should say something.

Father Time:

Macgyvercas:

Father Time:

Macgyvercas:
First ENN of 2010, fresh onto the ice, takes the puck down the rink, bluffs the defenders, he shoots...HE SCORES!

That was awesome, eh?

I think this should be filed under 'trying too hard to be Canadian'.

Okay, ya caught me. But is there really a problem with trying to be Canadian? I spend most of my time offline trying to be British and no one seems to care.

Not really a problem although you did get my hopes up of finding a hockey fan only to let me down that it's just another Canada fan *cue blame Canada*, so I thought I should say something.

If it makes you feel any better, I do like hockey (favorite team: Pittsburgh Penguins)

It does, I'm a Canes fan because I used to live in North Carolina and besides the Panthers (who I never heard of until the Superbowl), they were the only pro sports team we had and they were in the same city I lived in.

It's funny how the two puppets on the bookshelf seem to be enjoying themselves ;)

From the dragon age ESRB rating:

During the course of the game, players are able to visit a brothel where a hostess asks what they are interested in. If players select "Surprise me," they can sometimes wind up face-to-face with a woman, a man, a transsexual, or an animal.

On behalf of bioware: Surprise!

http://www.esrb.org/ratings/synopsis.jsp?Certificate=27228

Yes, I predict that in 10 years times, the Furries will picket outside of Disney & demand a dating sim for Gargoyles & Beauty & the Beast.

Love the background at the dog-sex-guy. ^^

Onyx Oblivion:
Good job. I loved the Space Jump Mario joke.

And I didn't wanna fuck Dogmeat. But the Fable 2 dog...

LOLOLOLOL THAT'S PRICELESS! Love it.

I love their small talk at the beginning and end.
"I've resolved to stop assaulting the homeless"
"ME TOO!"
:D

To quote Yahtzee from his Fable 2 review "Why can't I marry my dog?"

Father Time:
I wonder if it's been pointed out that laws against gay sex have been ruled unconstitutional here in the U.S. and if those laws are still on the books they can't be enforced.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_v._Texas

Oh and the guy's wrong the totem pole/slippery slope of sex in games (not counting porno games which probably have the totem pole completely covered in some weird sticky goo) goes as follows.

Hetero Sex
Homo Sex
Masturbation
Group Sex
Incest (with adults)
Rape
Necrophilia
Fetishes you would find on shock sites
Bestiality
Pedophilia

That is this is the order that they will gradually seep into gaming (and it's always possible for it to come to a halt at any one level).

Or at least that's what an aristocrat told me *cough*

I bet the pedophilia thing already has in Japan.

Let's not forget Belle the sheep in Arcanum!

IT'S VERY ILLEGAL! ... in fact can i get this guys phone number or WoW account information

hahahaha!!

Spawnfreak:

Father Time:
I wonder if it's been pointed out that laws against gay sex have been ruled unconstitutional here in the U.S. and if those laws are still on the books they can't be enforced.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_v._Texas

Oh and the guy's wrong the totem pole/slippery slope of sex in games (not counting porno games which probably have the totem pole completely covered in some weird sticky goo) goes as follows.

Hetero Sex
Homo Sex
Masturbation
Group Sex
Incest (with adults)
Rape
Necrophilia
Fetishes you would find on shock sites
Bestiality
Pedophilia

That is this is the order that they will gradually seep into gaming (and it's always possible for it to come to a halt at any one level).

Or at least that's what an aristocrat told me *cough*

I bet the pedophilia thing already has in Japan.

Well if you count porn they're all ready at pedophilia with rapeplay.

Seagal semen :| Sooo wrong but i couldnt help laugh. Good ep!

Actually, Dragon Age did cater to everyone. If you go to the brothel and choose "Surprise me" you might end up with a pair of nugs... =\

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