Zero Punctuation: Torchlight

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"More clicks than a school for dolphin telegraph operators."

I was pretty much in tears at that. Good episode.

Wooooooooooooo! Another in-reference that I will wholeheartedly treasure.

Was I the only one who almost shat himself with pure fear when I saw the silhouette of the chained up child? If you know anything about Yahtzee's works you'll know what I'm talking about.

Also lovely, now I definitely know to not buy this game.

Why does Yahtzee only review lesser known stuff lately (Torchlight, Saboteur, Demon's Souls) when stuff like DJ Hero, Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks, Resident Evil: Darkside Chronicles Band Hero, Samckdown vs RAW 2010 and Borderlands are all jumping up and down waiting for a good strong trashing?

El_Lazor:
I'm just surprised he reviewed it now considering it came out back in NOVEMBER.

He can review stuff henever the fuck he wants. You try buying a brand new game every week.

Yahtzee didn't notice about the 'hold the mouse button down' trick because his great mind was busy coming up with the jokes, puns and asides that would make up this most excellent review. And so what? Just because you can hold the mouse button down does not make the game any less boring.

Aww comon Torchlight rocks!

Hmm...

I am more interested in this game now

Wow, Australia sucks. No games more violent than your pacifist, used to be a stoned hippie aunt and a single ice cream sandwich costs $3. I could get a box of six for about $3.00 here stateside and let me tell you, very few games are as much fun as 6 ice cream sandwiches for me and my friends.

This was fantastic!

To quibble in re: the three rooms/copy paste thing, *all* of the levels are randomly generated, so there is that. Also you can just hold down the mouse button instead of clicking until your fingers fall off if you prefer.

ben---neb:
Yahtzee didn't notice about the 'hold the mouse button down' trick because his great mind was busy coming up with the jokes, puns and asides that would make up this most excellent review. And so what? Just because you can hold the mouse button down does not make the game any less boring.

Incorrect. Obviously you never played the actual game.

Get the demo, try it, make youtube video if you want, but the man is right last time I checked.

Actually I find Torchlight and similar games almost Zenlike in their combination of depth and simplicity. Truthfully I HAVE been waiting for the "Diablo" type genere to grow up to become as deep and complex as some of the roguelike games out there. One of the problems I have with the "Random dungeon loot-a-thon" is that it seems that as soon as someone adds graphics to the equasion (as opposed to working totally in ASCII and maybe later adding some kind of pathetic tile generator) they lose the abillity to achieve any kind of serious depth. Ever since Diablo or attempts like "Dungeon Hack" (the Forgotten Realms one in first person) I've sort of been hoping someone would actually take the time to create something with decent graphics that is more akin to "Adom" or whatever version "Nethack" is up to now. Of course then again we have my favorite roguelike nowadays which is called "Gearhead", which pretty much demonstrates how you *should* do a giant robot based CRPG, if someone was to pick that up for professional development and graphics design I imagine it would sell decently and probably achieve the classic status of things like "Xenogears".

That said, given Yahtzee's opinion of RPGs in general it doesn't susprise me he doesn't like the Diablo-esque action-RPG genere either. Though I admit he is on the money about a lot of things.

Ironically I will also mention that in playing an Alchemist on "Normal" in getting up to like level 29 I managed to die 6 times (I think). I'd find it funny if Yahtzee is unusually good at these things despite hating them.

Strictly speaking it does make me wonder what he'd consider a good balance for an action RPG. He criticized "Demon's Souls" for being too brutal, and Torchlight for being too easy. Most games that I feel fill a middle ground between those two extremes (neither of which is terrible) seem to get panned by him even more heavily.

Meh, it was ok but kinda dissapointed, who the hell even cares about Torchlight? I was hoping for Bayonetta or Dante's Inferno.

i liked torchligth for 5 bucks! nothing new, just plain old-school diablo fun!
Maybe if they put more work in the loading screen when you past a level. Book + text don't make a good history.

LobsterMobster:
While I can appreciate Yahtzee's trademark snark and venom, I did notice that he said he played it for at least 10 hours. That's a lot of time to put in to a game that's only better than an ice cream if it's buried under gravel/only accessible via straw. :)

The thing is, most of Yahtzee's complaints about it could be applied to any game in the genre. He'd might as well say, "this game is ridiculous and stupid because you get five guns that all shoot bullets and I don't even like shooting bullets to begin with." If that's not your thing, you won't like FPS's. :)

First I beleive that he often does his best to be proffessioanl and play enough of a game and a 10h campaign isnt bad.

Second clicking for EACH AND EVERY ATTACK is a pain. imagine playing CoD while having to press the trigger once per bullet. Not fun.

Huh, I'm mildly worried to see that the Diablo-tradition in RPGs has somehow been resurrected when I had hoped it had been properly staked in the heart 3 or 4 years ago. Why oh why are these things still being made? Why would you go and make an RPG that focuses on the two worst elements of the genre (loot and grinding)?

Btw Yahtzee, still waiting for a good Borderlands bashing.

I disagree, of course, Yahtzee ;)

But I was glad to see this game up on the chopping block anyway!

KDR_11k:
By the way, you can hold the mouse button down to continue attacking an enemy (same as in Diablo 2), no need to play Track & Field with your mouse buttons.

I thought the same thing.

Seems to me like Yahtzee should also complain about Diablo 2, Dungeon Siege and other... Diablo clones about being clicky.

SnootyEnglishman:
Smashing good review. Made even better that it was an obscure game not many have heard of.

And yet it was a huge commercial success, big enough to convince the developers to make an MMO.

LornMind:
Rather entertaining review. I hadn't heard of Torchlight until Yahtzee mentioned it though. I wonder if he's gonna review Borderlands..

He'll complain how it's not customizable enough and how you have to click too often and how stats determine BLU BLUE BLUERGH.

Let's face it - Yahtzee doesn't like RPGs or HnS games.

Cpt_Oblivious:

El_Lazor:
I'm just surprised he reviewed it now considering it came out back in NOVEMBER.

He can review stuff henever the fuck he wants. You try buying a brand new game every week.

Well since he get's paid to do this I assume it would be very easy. And if I remember, The Escapist actually buys him the games so go figure.

-BloodRush-:
i havnt watched it yet cus im in school, but i havnt heard of torchlight before. :/

school!? really!? wow its 1 am here (aus)

OT: brilliant as always, tho i thought he'd like it due to it being diablo
dunno why ,thought diablo would be something he'd like

crotalidian:

LobsterMobster:
While I can appreciate Yahtzee's trademark snark and venom, I did notice that he said he played it for at least 10 hours. That's a lot of time to put in to a game that's only better than an ice cream if it's buried under gravel/only accessible via straw. :)

The thing is, most of Yahtzee's complaints about it could be applied to any game in the genre. He'd might as well say, "this game is ridiculous and stupid because you get five guns that all shoot bullets and I don't even like shooting bullets to begin with." If that's not your thing, you won't like FPS's. :)

First I beleive that he often does his best to be proffessioanl and play enough of a game and a 10h campaign isnt bad.

Second clicking for EACH AND EVERY ATTACK is a pain. imagine playing CoD while having to press the trigger once per bullet. Not fun.

You can hold the mouse button down.

Reference to the days quadrilogy with the chained to a wall, nice self reference.
EDIT: Because John was chained into a wall in the cellar the same way, the more you know.

I just like this game because it lets me feed the Diablo II fanboy in my head without making another hammerdin. Also, supposedly this game is going MMO in near future. I'm pretty excited about that.

Aleate:
Why does every "rpg" nowadays need a dog?

They don't have to pay the voice actor.

I always find these style of Diablo style game to be most if not entirely fun in multiplayer... which I don't think Torchlight has.

This is the reason World of Warcraft and Diablo were so popular with other lesser games like Sacred 2 being a decent enough game provided the you have an internet connection above a snail's pace.

I'm surprised some people never heard of this, considering John Funk did a review of "Torchlight" late October. Well if anyone wants more info on the game, check out John Funk's review.

Honestly I was shocked that Yahtzee reviewed this game and was afraid to watch the video (I really love Torchlight). I agree with Yahtzee that there is some "accounting" with the gear, though the controls were not as bad as described by him (not that many mouse clicks).

Thanks for the video though, Yahtzee.

Yahtzee doesn't like the genre a game belongs to, hates said game, forumers declare him brilliant.

WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO REVIEW SILENT HILL SHATTERED MEMORIES !!!!!!!

i havent played torchlight, but it doesnt seem like my kind of game anyway..

El_Lazor:

Cpt_Oblivious:

El_Lazor:
I'm just surprised he reviewed it now considering it came out back in NOVEMBER.

He can review stuff henever the fuck he wants. You try buying a brand new game every week.

Well since he get's paid to do this I assume it would be very easy. And if I remember, The Escapist actually buys him the games so go figure.

My point of He can review things whenever the fuck he wants" stands.

LornMind:
Rather entertaining review. I hadn't heard of Torchlight until Yahtzee mentioned it though. I wonder if he's gonna review Borderlands..

Considering borderlands is just an easier diablo with guns, he technically just did.

Especially considering holding down the fire button renders you unable to hit anything outside of melee range.

I take it he didnt like it :P

this one seemed a bit short but i still found it extremely funny.
I wonder If the extra punctuation will be "Fetch quests" or "Rpgs".

Being a fan of the original Diablo and especially Diablo II, I think I might enjoy this game if I were to pick it up. However, I can see where some of the bits might get tedious. I'm also an MMO player, though, so incredibly boring things that take hours to play are right up my alley.

Jokes, snark, visual humor and rapid pace - this is trademark, quality ZP.

crotalidian:

LobsterMobster:
While I can appreciate Yahtzee's trademark snark and venom, I did notice that he said he played it for at least 10 hours. That's a lot of time to put in to a game that's only better than an ice cream if it's buried under gravel/only accessible via straw. :)

The thing is, most of Yahtzee's complaints about it could be applied to any game in the genre. He'd might as well say, "this game is ridiculous and stupid because you get five guns that all shoot bullets and I don't even like shooting bullets to begin with." If that's not your thing, you won't like FPS's. :)

First I beleive that he often does his best to be proffessioanl and play enough of a game and a 10h campaign isnt bad.

Second clicking for EACH AND EVERY ATTACK is a pain. imagine playing CoD while having to press the trigger once per bullet. Not fun.

no kiding... they are no-automatic weapons like g3 and you actually click one per bullet

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