Zero Punctuation: Borderlands

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I'm surprised I thought this week might Army of two:40th day or Dante's Inferno or MAG???

MAG is only multiplayer, thats kinda like volunteering your favorite friend as a grenade tester. and he has no legs.

I'm slightly amazed rough 250 comments in 3 hours. I'm not sure if their hate post or not... scary..

I cannot believe I spent 60 ducks on this repetitve garbage heap. Why couldn't yahtzee review this a week ago?! :(

I already bought ME2, and for some reason I can't still long enough to play it for more than an hour. Still a good game, just not for me. Something tells me yahtzee will find a way to rip into it though :P

The only thing I really agree with here is that Borderlands can be a bit repetitive. While its true the game can be fun online, you also have to deal with the people. The people who spend every waking hour of every day trying to find that one better gun that will make them the envy of the entire online community, or so they think. When one tries to play with these people, they constantly feel the need to step on our balls with golf shoes and tell us how bad we suck because we havn't played as obsessivly as them.

To counter these hardcores we get the utter noobs who bought the game and dived into the multi-player right away without getting a grip on the basics of the game. These are the people who spend most of their time looking around and exploring. And while theres nothing wrong with that it slows down the group, and you never know when this noob is going to explore an area filled with guys too high level for all of you and you wind up getting stomped. You then have to carry these noobs through every area teaching them everything they need to know to be a normal player while at the same time fending off the hordes and mutant venus fly-dogs that spawn out of dens almost as fast as your gun can shoot.

The single player I found incredably fun and I rarely ran into the same situation twice... though some were incredibly familiar and some of the boss fights required me to activly search for glitchs for me to hind behind while throwing bullets and dogs with more armor than a tank. When you play through the second time they increase the number of dogs that crawl out of dens and make the bosses so rediculosly over powered you feel like your playing a level one Mage against an eighty Rogue in Warcraft. You die a lot but to be honest it wasn't that bad. The second wind system is nice and is actually exploitable if your fighting a Badass and need to get close ebough to shoot without taking damage. Its a workable tactic. The only boss that gave me serious pause was a giant flying bird, but after spending an hour running around the map trying to find a safe haven I realized it couldn't hit you through overhead cover. i then spent 20 minutes shooting every bullet I had into it while ducking for cover in a building.

Overall I found the game highly enjoyable, though I have to admit I did find the interface annoying, but what am I gonna do? Stop playing?


You might be thinking about Fallout 3 rolling dice to determine if a bullet hits or not, you can have your shot perfectly lined up and pull the trigger and the bullet decides it's going to come out sideways or something. That was one of the many many annoying things about that game for me. Borderlands isn't like that at all, if your target fills the crosshairs you're 100% certain to hit.
I'm not sure how looking through the scope changes that, bullets don't always hit exactly where the dot says they will but that's dealing with guys who are really small even with Zoom on. Switching to a gun with ridiculous accuracy (97.5?) seemed to help.

No, I am speaking of Borderlands, hit detection/accuracy aren't totally d20 but the creators of the game have been quoted as it being a mix of actually accuracy (CoD style) and d20 (FO3 style), and it shows.

I love seeing the 5 people every time getting banned for saying first or whatever.

OT: I find it funny when people really like a game and they want Yahtzee to review it. Of all people he is a professional at ripping games apart, he already said that "no one likes when I have to say good things about a game". So what is gonna do to your favorite game? A lot.

Yahtzee Croshaw:

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Borderlands.

Be sure to join the Zero Punctuation Facebook Fan Page .

Watch Video

Yahtzee, you crazy man, I thought we learned from Smash Bros? People don't want reviews of demanded games, they want you to tell them how good it is. (by that same rate, why the hell they're going to you for a nice review is beyond me.)

HEHEHE WOW he's angry this time! i sorta knew he'd hate it.

I like it well enough but every single flaw he mentions is absolutely right, i wonder why he did'ntmention the horrible map design and lack of working physics - funnily enough, these are some of the things me and the guy i play it coop with likes about it - that much of it is simply so poorly made, we laugh at it alot.

Also, all the menu screens, the internet gamespy thing, and the compatibility (oh horror) are major failure!
Hate the damn claptrap too

i was hoping he'd review borderlands coz i enjoy it but i knew he'd hate it
now all i'm waiting for is Dante's inferno and a new XBLA video

Very well done as usual. I never really cared for Borderlands much myself, but you'd think that some people would just shut up about the game. I'm calling yet more 'Fan Dumb' if you get more hate-mail for the critique. I never heard about the GUI being like that, though. It sounds really dumb; what's wrong with displaying the stats of the weapon you have selected and changing the colour of the numbers on the weapon stats for if it's better or worse than what you have equipped?

I would ask what you thought of the weapon system, though, with all the millions of combinations of different ones you could get as they were generated on the spot, but I can hazard a guess that your response would be something along the lines of "A needless addition that makes it harder to find a particular weapon that works well for you since there's so bloody many of them".

Although, one thing I did notice;
01:17 - I think that's the first time I've ever heard you taking a breath in one of these videos. I take it you missed an edit?



With a good collection already on my hands I've learned to mostly grab guns for cash value. I only look at stats when it's time to sell and often end up keeping 1-2 to replace weapons in my current lineup. Yeah maybe I'm missing some awesome white-letter sniper rifle, but probably not.


So... He's a fanboy because he enjoys the game? I enjoyed it, too. Am I a fanboy?

Why do I always get sucked in by the obvious trolls?

All the complains are true, but I still love this game. Playing alone or with a few friends. Also this is really the first game that nailed FPS/RPG. Yeah, yeah, Mass Effect blah blah. But MS is still more talking and pausing the menu than shooting people in the face.

Oh god, you just called borderlands a FPS/RPG. You can customize weapons, it's like FPS with an RPG bit, divided by 10.

ME is a RPG/Shooter, and has definetively nailed it. :D And most of the talking is optional, skip it if you don' bother with it. And in ME2 the Action/Shooting part has got bigger focus, without loss of story. :)

And yes I'm a Mass Effect fanboy, and proud of it :D

sweet, he used a pic of the gelatinous cube mini from WotC's Desert of Desolation booster pack!

Bring on the Gelatinous Cube that is Mass Effect 2!

I have to admit, I don't care about other people's opinions on games, but I was starting to think that i was the only one who thought that Bordelands was a boring and repetitive as all hell, and I only played a small part.

Me and my girl friend love this game and agree it is only its best in multi player as a co op. Its the only game we can actually agree on except for the sharing of loot. The first time I went on Xbox Live and joined a game was last week and I stumbled on to one of the guys from gear box who I can only guess designed a part of the game and gave me an oooober shied that gives + 500% cash and an alien weapon that that destoys everthink in its path. It was amusing for a few minuits then afterward, quicky got boring and now my girl friend refuses to play anymore games with me. Thanks Gear box ¬_¬ yes I know we can share them or I could just not use them but you dont know this woman she is evil.... I think I've been watching too much ZP .....

Yahtzee Rules !

Not surprising that you found the game a bit boring. Hell I did as well but since I LOVE guns, I still played it. Nothing is funnier than shooting a fully armored Crimson Lance soldier with an acid sniper rifle and watching him roll around on the ground as he gets disintegrated xD

And I bet even you loved blowing the head off of a midget coming at you with a machete xD

And seeing the shotgun versions of them fall back after every shot >.>;; xD

I'm happy Yatzhee has justified my complete lack of interest in this Fallout wannabe.

Where's WALLY?

I laughed when I saw that Borderlands was the review this week. Personally I liked the game, got bored of it, hated watching my friends play it, borrowed it and got back into it, got sick of it again and bought Saint's Row 2.
The multiplayer (multiplayer gets spell-checked?) seems to only be fun when you're on an even level with everyone else. If you're even 5 levels below someone you do piss-all for damage to enemies and you're begging for help after two hits from anything. And receiving weapons from friends when they're 15 levels above yours feels infuriating. Plus hearing everyone say the same three lines through the entire game gets old in a day. Did the developers even test this game with the sound on?

Well this is my first time writing in to Zero Punctuation to hello to everyone [Shakes hands] and "Ahoy thar!!" to Yahtzee.

I think Yahtzee's strength is his ability to construct great metaphors: both verbal and visual. It's just a sight to behold and his skill at this has been steadily getting better and better: story is a book, grinding is a tread-cycle, setting is the Middle East, item names are arbitrary, enemies are Jason Vorheys, dying = bedridden, alien = space lobster, ego = internet cocks, public multiplayer = monkeyhouse, mcguffin = towtruck, etc etc etc. Every episode is like a brief lesson in metaphor.

Looking forward to more,


I agree and disagree with some of the complaints. However, to each their own. Was still a funny video to watch. Here's to whichever title you slag next. I'm curious as to your opinion on Dante's Inferno.

he reviwed BORDERLANDS!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am one of the naggers he was talking about btw.

Yeah, the menus really are a pain in the arse. Even on the 360 version. I can't actually stand the game for extended periods now, because of how trivial it is.

Well, actually since I hit the level cap I can't really get back on it anymore. However, before that I really enjoyed the game.

This isn't the first time I've caught Yahtzee reviewing a game he hasn't played past the first 5 minutes of, and I doubt it'll be the last.

my friends play this all the time and have a go at me because i got rid of my copy.

frankly after that horribly pathetic excuse for an end game boss/story line my heart just broke and i couldn't bring myself to play it anymore.

I mean i was playing that game all week looking forward to finding the treasure in the vault and what happens?.......

a fucking weak arse tentacle rape scene on some woman i don't give a fuck about only then to find out after killing it, that the creature WAS the vault and I get NOTHING other than some crappy loot and a pat on the back from a seeminly unappreciative holographic women (cant remember her name).

yeah cheers for that borderlands that sure was an epic adventure. . . . . .

To be honest, I would not-so-secretly take pleasure in seeing Yahtzee review FFXIII and watching him going totally apeshit about how much he hates it. Then he could do a review about a theoretical Branston pickle game the week following so he could recover.

What class was he again?

I played solo all the way through as the Siren and had a good enough time.

The worst part is borderlands was almost a great game. All it really needed was adjustable difficulty or a (WORKING) /players 8 command.

Especially after you get one of the more inane weapons.

I know you can have a good time when you play with your friends, but if you can't have fun by yourself, something's wrong. I can't remember the last time I played a game that had a great balance of single player and multiplayer (not MW2)

i played through borderlands with a friend of mine, and it was good fun. we leveled up quickly, and finished the game. end.
no farming, no grinding, no boring stuff, etc.

the review was unbiased, but who the fuck cares? i'm not watching zp to be biased.

To be honest, i think the only reason they made a single player campaign is just so they can market if off to people without a a decent internet connection.

Its pretty much a multiplayer game, but eh, i don't care.

Yahtzee made a good point in the sense of why I have to read objectives when they have voice actors to give out the occassional one liner and grunt who can simply to go to X and kill Y. It reminded me of Dead Rising when I had to read the little text that the janitor was giving me while trying to make sure that zombies didn't eat my jugular viens.

And the vehicles didn't help out either since, if I recall correctly, the left stick was used for steering while the right was used for acceleration. But, in all, it was a decent game I beat in roughly a week.

His analysis of fanboys requests at the beginning was spot-on. I could never tell what all the people nagging him to do Borderlands were expecting.

thank (insert religious figure here) AVP is coming out soon and the demo is awesome, maybe he will review that instead of most of the shite that he's forced to review... just saying


I take pictures of my car's odometer every 10.000 km! Why exactly does that put me on the same level as all these MMORPG trolls? At least I leave the house to do that twice a year!

I thought he was joking, people actually do this? What on earth could possibly be the point?

well go ahaed and use your imagination. I for example just want to have any kind of proof that my car lasted for about double the lifetime others of it's kind usually have.
And if you would just try to think about it rather then just blatantly ask in disbelief, you could probably could think of another dozen reasons.

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