Unskippable: Bayonetta

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hURR dURR dERP:

Amazingly, that still doesn't help me make a whole lot of sense out of the intro video...

I should just stick to "bad guys are over there - shoot them to win" kinda games. :P

From what I gathered, that's EXACTLY the plot of Bayonetta.
Just like Devil May Cry, Dynasty Warriors, I'm assuming God Hand and God of War as well?

Righttttt.... I have no god damned clue what that was all about, and the 'cutting her suit' thing was just pervy.

Oh well, good job guys, you made more sense out of it than me.

mechanics of the game is sublime too bad there is too much cheese in the cutscenes XD

GrahamS:
As someone has mentioned, Enzo (the little annoying Italian shit) basically never appears at all after this scene.

Which makes his overbearing presence in it even worse!

That is so true. Characters like Enzo need to be diluted with lots more screen time.

Although if a chick I was hanging around suddenly started flying, beating up "angels" and then went naked with her hair becoming her catsuit....I think I could manage that face. Without feeling pain.

Wow, I'd be really embarrassed to play a game with as ridiculous cut-scenes as bayonetta.

JEBWrench:

hURR dURR dERP:

Amazingly, that still doesn't help me make a whole lot of sense out of the intro video...

I should just stick to "bad guys are over there - shoot them to win" kinda games. :P

From what I gathered, that's EXACTLY the plot of Bayonetta.
Just like Devil May Cry, Dynasty Warriors, I'm assuming God Hand and God of War as well?

I believe you are correct. I have no idea what the hell you are supposed to be doing in this game. They probably just grab a bunch of popular ideas from other games and "Frankensteined" it together.

"Wha? .. eh?... ooh ...

Hey, are we allowed to keep watching this?"

"I hope so!"

Excellent :D

Played Bayonetta 3 times, still have no idea what the plots about. It really is as nonsensical and insane as the intro implies.
Gameplay is freaking amazing though, which is all you need to enjoy this kind of game anyway.

Legs of doom!

you guys are thinking of Rodan, this guy's Rodin the French sculptor

Hulyen:

Aby_Z:
Oh man, you guys cut out right before my favorite part. This game helped hammer the nail of a song that "Fly me to the Moon" is after NGE stuck into my skull.

Oh good, I'm not the only one who winces uncontrollably when that song comes on anywhere because of NGE!

Wince? No, no, no; I love the damned song. You misinterpreted by metaphor. NGE simply made it so that song will not leave my head, and Bayonetta cemented the song there. I can recite it by heart now.

Aby_Z:

Hulyen:

Aby_Z:
Oh man, you guys cut out right before my favorite part. This game helped hammer the nail of a song that "Fly me to the Moon" is after NGE stuck into my skull.

Oh good, I'm not the only one who winces uncontrollably when that song comes on anywhere because of NGE!

Wince? No, no, no; I love the damned song. You misinterpreted by metaphor. NGE simply made it so that song will not leave my head, and Bayonetta cemented the song there. I can recite it by heart now.

I like the song...I just don't like the NGE versions of it, eheheh.

Hulyen:

Aby_Z:

Hulyen:

Aby_Z:
Oh man, you guys cut out right before my favorite part. This game helped hammer the nail of a song that "Fly me to the Moon" is after NGE stuck into my skull.

Oh good, I'm not the only one who winces uncontrollably when that song comes on anywhere because of NGE!

Wince? No, no, no; I love the damned song. You misinterpreted by metaphor. NGE simply made it so that song will not leave my head, and Bayonetta cemented the song there. I can recite it by heart now.

I like the song...I just don't like the NGE versions of it, eheheh.

I'll be figuring out which version of it I like soon enough. I recently got all the soundtracks for NGE (241 songs total) and there's well over 26 different versions of Fly me to the moon on it. It's goina be hell sorting through all of 'em.

I nearly died
"they are instrunments of god."
...mostly the brass section

"Gravestone falls and causes a domino effect"
Y'know, they would never put the gravestones like that, for that exact reason!
...to be fair, if I were in charge of a cemetary I'd put the gravestones like that, for that exact reason.
...and that's why your not in charge of a cemetary...
*at the same time*
...for that exact reason.

I was SO going to ask you guys to make a Bayonetta video when I saw the Bullet Witch one, but then I thought 'Nah, I'm not going to bother them with that.'

You just filled my life with undescribable joy <3

Bayonetta is all about kicking ass. The intro showed exactly what you are expected to be doing the entire thing, kicking ass.

The story typically ends up out the window when a game is focused on the combat, especially if it's a brawler.

"Too bad he can't see this awesome fight scene" was I think my lol joke.

That was so corny (the game cutscene that is), I could barely watch it.

This cut-scene is totally skippable...just press start...

"I sure hope so!"

Don't we all do?

it's the legggs man...

is it just me or does that black terminator guy look familiar?

ving rhames? no... damnit... can't think now.

What do you mean "unnecessary?" Every one of those shots is absolutely VITAL!

Terminator? What are you talking about? That's Blade!

"aww, and the search lights out of nowhere signal our exit" lol

I loved the bullet witch reference.

That's all I could think of from the moment they started giving the sneak peeks to Electronic Playground.

Wow, that's got to be the most WTF nonsencical opening custscene I've ever seen.

"... for precisely that reason"
LOL, priceless!

ssgt splatter:
I liked Bullet Witch more than this one for some reason and that one had zombie soldiers.

and by the way, I thought witches didn't need prayers.

Jaxxo:
Terminator? What are you talking about? That's Blade!

yah, white, kinda Vin Diesel-ey blade.

was that meant to be funny cause i found it as funny as a brown wall

That was the second stupidest thing I've ever seen.

The grave stones mark the perfect encapsulation of any Unskippable Video ala our hosts.

And now the clever reference:
The people hired to continue this cinematic after the sacking of the people originally responsible for creating this cinematic, wish it to be known that they have been sacked. The context of this cinematic will be completed in a silly commentary style done at great expense and at the last minute.

What the hell was that?

What the hell was that? How can I watch a whole intro and be even more confused about the plot than when I came into it, knowing nothing? This doesn't seem physically possible....

Oh my God... you renounced the name 'Eggman' and corrected it as 'Robotnik'.

Is it too early to declare my undying love?

...What...did I just watch? ...I mean the review was really nice and fantastic, but the Intro... ..yeah.. I just tilted my head...

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