Escape to the Movies: Halo Legends

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I say only the clips that weren't shoving anime essence and Japanese culture down our throats were the good/decent/tolerable ones. Like, the "Origin" clips were great and so was "The Package" but what got to me was that the Japanese don't understand that Halo can't fulfill every anime nerd's dream because it is a first person shooter without jiggling boobs or experience points so they went and changed it to something that would relate to that genre.

You know, I'm not even going to scroll through the 250-some-odd comments to make sure no one else raised this issue already. I am irritated enough to just skip that part of the process and go right to expressing my opinion (which I intend to forward directly to you as well as posting here in the forums).

Bob, when- exactly- did you get to decide what I should like and dislike?

I'm asking that question because you seemed to have stepped over the boundary of informing me- the consumer- about the pros and cons about the execution of the work in question, and subjecting me to your personal biases and opinions regarding the subject matter of the work in question!

Listen, fuckhead: YOU ARE A CRITIC, NOT GOD. That means you critique the style and the execution. That DOES NOT MEAN you get to determine whether or not something is fit for my viewing--- well, you know, the exception being that you are suddenly transported to Nazi Germany and took a position in Goebbel's propoganda department.

And before you write me off as some sort of rabid Halo fanboy? I played through Halo once. Just ONCE. I played about two hours of Halo 2. Other than that, I have not played any other Halo-related game. (Don't even own an XBox 360; just FYI.)

But all the same, I am filled with rage after watching this video, because- dating from the Book of Eli review until now- I can see you interjecting your own personal beliefs and biases into your reviews, rather than serving as an objective lens, which I believe is the goal of the critic. After all, would you really presume to speak for the preferences of everyone who watches your review??? Are you THAT arrogant? I would hope not. I would hope that you would limit your critique to those elements of movie-making that affect everyone (your review of 2012 comes to mind, where you contrasted it with the dreck that Michael Bay dishes out), rather than trying to dictate what the viewer prefers.

But apparently, you've recently decided that you should be telling us what is worth watching and what isn't. And in this review, your distain for the Halo franchise hangs heavy over the whole matter, and clearly leeches out any useful information about whether or not this video might interest me- someone who has neither a positive nor a negative attitude towards the franchise.

Thanks, Bob, for completely wasting my time. As if I couldn't find a myriad of other people to do that.

I'm sorry Moviebob, but Homecoming was in truth the main one I had a problem with. I mean, the story is the military kidnapping children to become super soldiers? Instead of adopting orphans, wouldn't the kidnapped victims hate and resent those that destroy their life. I don't know it felt very sloppy, that she wouldn't go on a suicidal rampage to take revenge against the system, doesn't make any sense.

Ps: MY 1ST POST -- Avid animelover and haven't played any Halo games nor FPS

To be fair, Yahtzee does the exact same thing, and his statements possess even less truthyness. This is the new age of critics, where they believe that everyone should have their beliefs. It is the internet age of critics, where you don't need to be good to get noticed, you just need an internet connection and a throbbing ego. Forget it Jack, it's Chinatown.

B-b-b-but AvP2!!!

I pride myself as a moderately enthusiastic Halo/Xbox fan. (As in not foaming at the mouth) This sounds interesting.

Wow, what little I saw of The Duel looked really, really, REALLY good.

Halo is a little like the Matrix for me. I like it a lot but acknowledge its inferior sequels, obnoxiously-loyal fanbase and the fact other series' (both in gaming and out of it) have done science-fiction warfare a lot better. For example, I don't think anything in the Halo anime is going to stack up to, say, Jin-Roh, Ghost in the Shell or Battle Angel Alita. But that's okay. It's cool to see experiments like this. Am I the only one who looks at this package and thinks "Animatrix?" That's what this feels like. Sure, the Animatrix had some duds in there, but it was also a cool experiment that yielded some impressive results.

Souplex:

To be fair, Yahtzee does the exact same thing, and his statements possess even less truthyness. This is the new age of critics, where they believe that everyone should have their beliefs. It is the internet age of critics, where you don't need to be good to get noticed, you just need an internet connection and a throbbing ego. Forget it Jack, it's Chinatown.

This seems like a good point to interject that Critics today are taking on the sort of evolution that was foretold (and later came to pass) for journalists in the film Network. The Internet, more than anything else, is the world's largest soap box.

Also, I believe some people have called me retarded several times over the course of this thread. I would like to reciprocate with a suggestion they retain their anonymity or I shall be forced to hunt them down.

*grumbles*

*grumbles*

damnit movie bob. Your review actually makes me want to go out and see them now, so good job!

Teh Blasta:

paragon1:

Brutal Legend
Mass Effect 1 and 2
Assassin's Creed II
Dragon Age
Uncharted 1 and 2
Bioshock
So...yeah.

Some of those are not FPS.

OT: Weird review, didn't expect Halo Legends to be this week's review.

And? I seem to remember his statement being that Western games, not FPS, had only one type of character. He only mentioned Halo, and showed images of Halo and Gears (which isn't an FPS either, btw) as examples of Western games. I disagreed with his sentiment, and provided a few counterexamples.

This is a combination of two things I hate with a passion: Halo's Storyline and Anime.

I've watched Babysitter and The Duel and I loathed them both.

What a shit movie review. First time I couldnt finish watching one of the Bobsters videos.

I wouldnt even call this tripe a movie.

Mezzo.:
Oh lawdy lawd.

Spartan 1337. That has to be a joke somehow.

I couldn't help but chuckle at that.

Canid117:
You do realize that not all Halo fans are raging dickholes right Bob?

Yeah, but the vast majority of them are.

Will give it a look. MovieBob, I have learned that you and I have very similar movie taste, which is a bit odd. Keep up the good work.

Ironically it is availiable on Blu-Ray, which is Sony's format. So you can actaully have Halo on a PS3 now.

I thought I was the only one that remembered Monster Rancher. God, to be 10 again...
Thanks, Bob. Japan FTW I guess.

RTR:
I thought I was the only one that remembered Monster Rancher. God, to be 10 again...
Thanks, Bob. Japan FTW I guess.

I remember Monster Rancher, too! I remember how awesome it was, and how they kept skipping episodes when it got near the end of the first season.

Yeah, there apparently was a season 2 that never came out in the US, or so I've been told.

From this reveiw it sounds like they took the Animatrx and stamped Halo on the cover. I like the Halo series but I would have to give them an F on originality here.

paragon1:

Teh Blasta:

paragon1:

Brutal Legend
Mass Effect 1 and 2
Assassin's Creed II
Dragon Age
Uncharted 1 and 2
Bioshock
So...yeah.

Some of those are not FPS.

OT: Weird review, didn't expect Halo Legends to be this week's review.

And? I seem to remember his statement being that Western games, not FPS, had only one type of character. He only mentioned Halo, and showed images of Halo and Gears (which isn't an FPS either, btw) as examples of Western games. I disagreed with his sentiment, and provided a few counterexamples.

I already responded to this, check my earlier post. Its a few down this original post.

solidstatemind:

Okay, I'll bite.

What it would come down to, I imagine, as the main difference between us here would be a matter of philosophical disagreement.

For my part - and I'm speaking ONLY for myself here - I don't know that the type of objectivity you're talking about is actually possible in a critique of a film (or book, or painting for that matter.) From my vantage point, a film/art critic isn't precisely the same "job" as a product tester; i.e. someone who writes about (for example) new cars for Car & Driver. In that arena, you're mainly critiquing things that have near-universal elements of either success or failure: Are the brakes responsive? Does it steer properly? Are the seats comfortable? Is the dashboard-setup sensible and/or intiutive? These are yes-or-no areas of critique, either they "work" or they don't. There's not much about an automobile that "depends on how you look at it."

A film/art/whatever critic doesn't really, aside from a handful of technical concepts, have that kind of space to work in. EVERYTHING about a purely-creative work is of subjective value - it's all "eye-of-the-beholder" at the end of the day. As much as the words themselves might get tossed around to make a point, there is NO "right" or "wrong" when it comes to this stuff. So, as far as I'm concerned, EVERY episode of this show is "nothing but" my opinion - which, by it's nature, includes and is informed by my biases, preferences, prejudices and psychological hangups - because that's all any of us really have in regards to purely-creative work.

Now, IN THEORY, a "professional" critic's opinion may be assumed to "count for more" because he/she is (again, IN THEORY) better-informed on the subject by virtue of making they're living being so. But really, it's ALL just opinion - my opinion of the movies and the audiences opinion OF my opinion. I don't presume to be "god" or to have the last word on anything. I watch a movie, I give my opinion of it... and then add jokes and edit funny pictures in-time with the audio.

Really, I promise: I'm not here to "tell" you anything other than "here's-what-I-thought-(plus-jokes)-about-X." ;)

Watched Babysitter on Waypoint when Waypoint first came out. I plan to watch the rest of them at some point.

And this some rusty knowledge from someone who read the books years ago and generally doesn't like the Halo Universe, mostly because Master Chief is the focus.

I sincerely think Space Marines ODSTs are great however.

Huh, and here when I heard about Halo Legends, I thought it was just gonna be a full length movie. Didn't expect to see "Halo Does Animatrix". Still, was hoping to see a review on The Crazies. :(

Edit: As for the expect FPS defense, I'll just say that I'm not gonna do much to defend Halo. While it isn't a [i]bad[i] FPS title, I can most certainly agree that it isn't anything too note-worthy. It didn't really do anything new that hadn't been done already, or at least the few things that it did do that were new weren't really things I'd have listed as "good points" for the game. If anything I would argue that the Halo series stagnated the FPS genre by starting a number of trends that every wannabe FPS title insisted on copying from that point forth. Some of managed to make decent games of those mechanics, while others just used the mechanics to make a ho-hum game into just another "Halo clone" with a different skin.

Very few of the best FPS titles of the past 10 years or so (about when the first Halo was released) didn't use any Halo-based ideas, meanwhile nearly every "Meh" or worse FPS of the past 10 years borrowed heavily from Halo. So what does that tell you?

Gotta love moviebob's belief that if it wasn't for Halo, there wouldn't be interest in the 360, cause it is kinda true. One of the reasons I like the franchise, apart from teabagging grunts, is that it gave birth to the 360 and thus, to Mass Effect 2.

Spoon1138:
Boo.

Aaaaaaand suspended.

solidstatemind:

But apparently, you've recently decided that you should be telling us what is worth watching and what isn't.

Umm, I am pretty sure that this is the whole point of a review. Suggest whether something is worth spending time upon. What would you expect from a movie review? It doesn't say 'DON'T GET THIS' or anything like that. And hey, Yahtzee is biased too. That doesn't make his videos less enjoyable or watchable.

katsabas:
Gotta love moviebob's belief that if it wasn't for Halo, there wouldn't be interest in the 360, cause it is kinda true. One of the reasons I like the franchise, apart from teabagging grunts, is that it gave birth to the 360 and thus, to Mass Effect 2.

I guess you could call it a case of the ends justifying the means. Though I wouldn't praise the 360 for the birth of Mass Effect. That was made by Bioware which is owned by EA. If they didn't make Mass Effect for the 360, they'd have made it for something else (heck, it had a PC release if nothing else).

WhiteTigerShiro:
I guess you could call it a case of the ends justifying the means. Though I wouldn't praise the 360 for the birth of Mass Effect. That was made by Bioware which is owned by EA. If they didn't make Mass Effect for the 360, they'd have made it for something else (heck, it had a PC release if nothing else).

True, true, but I love me more a controller than a keyboard. Matter of taste. I should get me a better video card for ME2 though. I have an incredible itch.

I guess i dont understand the obsession with halo bashing. I myself am a proud halo fan, sure the backstory is nothing spectacular, but one must remember that japan is privy to its share of awful video game rhetoric in the form of woefully jingoistic, horribly stereotyped, juvenile, unimaginative, and angst ridden video games, movies etc. Even a fan favorite, eveangellion, was mediocre at best, succumbing to many of the aforementioned problems. That is not to say i do not enjoy anime, manga and all things japanese, i just think some perspective is nice. The best storytelling and writing for video games in recent years has come from bioware a distinctly american studio. Saying something is better because it is japanese or worse because it is american is a grave injustice for any critic. For the most part i respect your reviews, but i must take offense at your blanket statements; american game designers have long held to one hard, fast rule; the game MUST be fun to play. the japanese prefer to design games around the concept that games are first and foremost a storytelling experience, and even that is not always true, some japanese staples have near incomprehensible stories and poor game mechanics (see the metal gear series). ok... i am done with my rant, but i wish a more fair review was given; i have lost a degree of respect for your reviews mr chipman.

the_baku_eats_dreams:

Odoylerules360:
It was really hard to hear what he was saying over the sound of Japan's balls furiously smacking against his chin.

But however, in all seriousness, Fuck Japan.

oh ho? what excatly are your problems with the country from which half of my family comes from? awfully chauvinistic statement you're making there buddy

I think using chauvinistic is the wrong, a chauvinistic statement is one that is usually defined as male superiority rhetoric, though i understand the broader definition you are using there, jingoistic is a more appropriate word in that context. i would also like to note the irony of using jingoistic (and by extension chauvinistic) to describe ones attitude toward Japan because they have a woeful track record in terms of open-mindedness toward other cultures. Further, the Japanese have traditionally (and still to a large extent) believe that the world is divided into the Japanese and Gaijin.

Moviebob, let me call your 'no counting Half-Life' rule and raise you a 'Half-Life isn't, either' rule.

If anyone can explain to my why Gordan Freemon is any more interesting than the Doom Marine or why his pack of self-defeating cheerleaders make his particular dystopian fascist future state any more interesting or unique than the thousands of other tired genre money-spinners that pulled it off without relying on ass-pulls and deus ex machinas for every major plot point, then in return for the completion of your impossible task I will reveal the secrets of the Time Cube to you and you can join me in my secret deep-sea trench lair to view the arrival of The Mangled Ones from their great crystalline bathysphere of nightmares.

gamegod25:

flosy:
Halo ODST was one of the worst FPS games I have ever played,

Then I guess you haven't played many FPS because I can name plenty of games that are far worse.

Ok maybe not the worst FPS, but definitely the worst AAA title, and especially annoying considering the hype. Just to clarify I like halo, but 1-3; they where fun and 3 wrapped up the storey once and for all! Halo ODST ripped the game up from its roots with really bad animations, depressingly bad voice acting, buggy vehicle systems despite the vehicles in 3 being fine, and a storey unbelievably shallow and unfulfilling.. When you pay 40 for a game you don't want to finish it within 5 hours, and do so with no sense of satisfaction. OFC there are worse FPS games, but I still put ODST alongside Two-Worlds(which smashed nicely tnx for asking) at the top of my least faverate games.... Also every1 knows Quake Live is better than Halo online!

MovieBob:

solidstatemind:

Okay, I'll bite.

What it would come down to, I imagine, as the main difference between us here would be a matter of philosophical disagreement.

For my part - and I'm speaking ONLY for myself here - I don't know that the type of objectivity you're talking about is actually possible in a critique of a film (or book, or painting for that matter.) From my vantage point, a film/art critic isn't precisely the same "job" as a product tester; i.e. someone who writes about (for example) new cars for Car & Driver. In that arena, you're mainly critiquing things that have near-universal elements of either success or failure: Are the brakes responsive? Does it steer properly? Are the seats comfortable? Is the dashboard-setup sensible and/or intiutive? These are yes-or-no areas of critique, either they "work" or they don't. There's not much about an automobile that "depends on how you look at it."

A film/art/whatever critic doesn't really, aside from a handful of technical concepts, have that kind of space to work in. EVERYTHING about a purely-creative work is of subjective value - it's all "eye-of-the-beholder" at the end of the day. As much as the words themselves might get tossed around to make a point, there is NO "right" or "wrong" when it comes to this stuff. So, as far as I'm concerned, EVERY episode of this show is "nothing but" my opinion - which, by it's nature, includes and is informed by my biases, preferences, prejudices and psychological hangups - because that's all any of us really have in regards to purely-creative work.

Now, IN THEORY, a "professional" critic's opinion may be assumed to "count for more" because he/she is (again, IN THEORY) better-informed on the subject by virtue of making they're living being so. But really, it's ALL just opinion - my opinion of the movies and the audiences opinion OF my opinion. I don't presume to be "god" or to have the last word on anything. I watch a movie, I give my opinion of it... and then add jokes and edit funny pictures in-time with the audio.

Really, I promise: I'm not here to "tell" you anything other than "here's-what-I-thought-(plus-jokes)-about-X." ;)

Okay, okay. Legitimate counter-argument. That said, I expect you to at least address non-subjective aspects of the films you critique (production values, continuity, logic, acting, etc.), to provide those who may not agree with your subjective reasoning but would be interested in your < ahem > critical opinion of the craft involved.

I'm dead serious Bob. I respect the Hell out of your knowledge of the cinema (I still remember your discussion of the framing of the shot of LA sliding into the ocean in '2012', and that is exactly the kind of thing I'm speaking about), and I would love to apply that knowledge to the movies that I am considering seeing. However, all I have gleaned from several recent reviews is: "omgdidnotlike". Either brief or no discussion of artistic and directorial merit. This is actually, in my mind, a drastic deviation from reviews where you at least acknowledged meritorious aspects of production values or whatnot, even if it was but a mention. THAT is the information I feel comfortable taking with me to the box office, even if we don't see eye-to-eye in regards to the subject matter.

TL;DR synopsis: slam if you gotta, but please. PLEASE... give at least a 15 second take on the objective values of movies, so that those people (like me) can apply your knowledge of theater- which I am more than willing to admit vastly outstrips mine- to our decisions, regardless as to whether or not we agree with you in the 'taste' department.

Wait a minute. A movie critic is suggesting his viewers see or not see a movie. WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO!!

What next, some kind of scoring system, possibly based on hand gestures?

Fun fact: Gene Shalit hated Caddyshack

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