Zero Punctuation: Final Fantasy XIII

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This is now the best ZP ever.

Final Fantasy XIII and its new direction can bite me. I'd rather go play an RPG with a plot that makes sense.

Played it for a bit yesterday , for me it was like , watching a michael bay movie , all the action and robots and such viewed through a host of over-the-top effects that make watching it a pain to the eyes , only in this case the "action" was the gaming part of the game , FFXII is missing the point by a mile ,I would choose chrono trigger over this stool anytime .

tony2077:

Kwatsu:
I've played FFXIII for over thirty hours now, I'm on the third disc, and quite frankly, I'm STILL waiting for it to get good.

you must not be a jrpg fan so move on

tony2077:

richtaur:
I feel exactly the same way about Final Fantasy games. I was in love with 1, 2/4 and 3/6 ... 7 was OK ... and fuck the rest. End of story!

i like 1 10 12 and 13 haven't been able to find or play the others

tony2077:

richtaur:
I feel exactly the same way about Final Fantasy games. I was in love with 1, 2/4 and 3/6 ... 7 was OK ... and fuck the rest. End of story!

i like 1 10 12 and 13 haven't been able to find or play the others

to reiterate what Tetranitrophenal is saying with out coming of as some kind of douche(i hope i am atleast), i gotta say if you haven't played some of the older final fantasy then your missing out and i highly recommend them. they are all good but the most popular seem to be 6 and 7, although 9 is a great second place and the personal favorite of the series creator. part 8 has its moments but the stupid ass story and the unbelievably emo main character made me want to puke.

when ppl talk about the FF glory days they tend to mainly reminisce about the amount of depth the characters had and the narrative of the story, not so much on the actual game play. to use myself as an example, i thought FFX was a great game, game play wise but the shallow characters and the godawful script made me sick. these are opinions though and make with them what you will.

I actually liked,sorry, felt sympathetic towards the JRPG genre but this review makes it much easier to hate.

adafuns:

tony2077:

Kwatsu:
I've played FFXIII for over thirty hours now, I'm on the third disc, and quite frankly, I'm STILL waiting for it to get good.

you must not be a jrpg fan so move on

tony2077:

richtaur:
I feel exactly the same way about Final Fantasy games. I was in love with 1, 2/4 and 3/6 ... 7 was OK ... and fuck the rest. End of story!

i like 1 10 12 and 13 haven't been able to find or play the others

tony2077:

richtaur:
I feel exactly the same way about Final Fantasy games. I was in love with 1, 2/4 and 3/6 ... 7 was OK ... and fuck the rest. End of story!

i like 1 10 12 and 13 haven't been able to find or play the others

to reiterate what Tetranitrophenal is saying with out coming of as some kind of douche(i hope i am atleast), i gotta say if you haven't played some of the older final fantasy then your missing out and i highly recommend them. they are all good but the most popular seem to be 6 and 7, although 9 is a great second place and the personal favorite of the series creator. part 8 has its moments but the stupid ass story and the unbelievably emo main character made me want to puke.

when ppl talk about the FF glory days they tend to mainly reminisce about the amount of depth the characters had and the narrative of the story, not so much on the actual game play. to use myself as an example, i thought FFX was a great game, game play wise but the shallow characters and the godawful script made me sick. these are opinions though and make with them what you will.

ok i'll be honest i have played the games and i like them but i still prefer the newer ones

*goes HOLY SHIT at the amount of comments this video has* O_o seriously, give it a rest people, like you all weren't expecting this to happen?

tony2077:

Kwatsu:
I've played FFXIII for over thirty hours now, I'm on the third disc, and quite frankly, I'm STILL waiting for it to get good.

you must not be a jrpg fan so move on

I played and enjoyed FFX (though I hated FFX-2), FFXII, Shadow Hearts Covenant, Final Fantasy Tactics and A2, and Kingdom Hearts, so while I wouldn't call myself a fan, I do enjoy them. What bugs me is that there IS a good game in here somewhere, it's like the game just won't let me get to it. :(

Angelo Credo:

ikyda1:
i quit after 10 hours....the greatest disappointment of 2010...can i have my money back? i know the know the answer so dont mention it

Sigh, ditto, and I love Final Fantasy too...

XIII was such a fucking letdown that I can't bring myself to play any more, for once I actually find myself agreeing with Yahtzee, I hate the characters with a passion, the plot makes no sense and it's all just spectacle...The linearity in this instalment kills me too.
At least in prior games I had the feeling of a fairly large, open world from the word go, but eh...

Actually, that sums up my thoughts on the game pretty well. 'Eh...'

I just don't know where the magic went, FFXIII used to have likeable characters and an engrossing story, apparently that went out the window in favour of making it look pretty.

from the trailers i saw i was betting it was gonna be a modern day FF7 but i was greatly mistaken.. way toooo repetitive combat, linearity game progressing and the grinding within the game is terrible ( i was expecting FFX style grinding)

Kwatsu:

tony2077:

Kwatsu:
I've played FFXIII for over thirty hours now, I'm on the third disc, and quite frankly, I'm STILL waiting for it to get good.

you must not be a jrpg fan so move on

I played and enjoyed FFX (though I hated FFX-2), FFXII, Shadow Hearts Covenant, Final Fantasy Tactics and A2, and Kingdom Hearts, so while I wouldn't call myself a fan, I do enjoy them. What bugs me is that there IS a good game in here somewhere, it's like the game just won't let me get to it. :(

well it seem you like jrpg maybe this one isn't your style maybe its time to move on and try a different one

Final Fantasy V? Really? You're holding that up as one of the good ones? The game I could only play for three hours because the story got THAT stupid. I mean, the villain's name is X-Death (!) and you ride a meteor to another planet where you can still use the same currency to buy things? That's even beyond my ability to spend disbelief. VI was great up until the World of Ruin, where it seems the developers were just saying, "We ran out of story. You're on your own." VIII was great until the second most ridiculous plot twist in history. From that point on, I forced myself to finish it, since I had already put so many hours into it. I do agree that XII was awful, though. It was like they were trying to make a single player MMO, only with characters made of cardboard.

This is the Final Fantasy that stops me from continuing with the series. I didn't even have to play it. I watched a buddy of mine play it for about an hour (close to end-game, but not quite) and I nearly threw a chair through his TV.

The characters have no depth, or range of emotion; the story is more cliched than Don Cherry; and the combat is about as fun as playing Discworld with the audio files disabled.

The funny thing is... He's right about this game. People who "enjoy" it just way too familiar with ridiculous bullshit to actually notice that game is crap...

Milking fans, Square, always milking fans...

adafuns:

when ppl talk about the FF glory days they tend to mainly reminisce about the amount of depth the characters had and the narrative of the story, not so much on the actual game play. to use myself as an example, i thought FFX was a great game, game play wise but the shallow characters and the godawful script made me sick. these are opinions though and make with them what you will.

Of course you cant expect a snes game to be better than a PS2 or PS3 game, since the graphics look mildly better than Tetris. But the story, the story is what set these games apart. Every character's background was carefully crafted so that in someway or the other you could connect with them.

In contrast, FF12 for example had a useless main character, Vaan IMO was the worse character in the series he had no importance in the actual plot whatsoever!. Even if he actually died in the story no significant changes would occur everybody will continue their journey without him as they would with him, he's just tagging along for the ride. At least Vanelle, (annoying and all) really connected with Hope and was a key element to keep him form committing suicide with her "sweet" (yet freakishly annoying)attitude.

If people ( including Nocturnal) think that FF12 had better story than, say, FF6 then, hell, something must be wrong with you because that story sucked eggs! (rotten green, alien, eggs).

It is impossible to say that FF6 looks better or had better AI than FF12 of course not, after all Snes <<< PS2 but then again, what game these days dosent look good? if we let looks dictate what game is good or not then FF13 must the greatest game of all times! >.>

ragnawind:
I forgot to mention in my previous post these facts:
You can't make a good review without pointing out the good and the bad in something. If you only talk about the bad points, you are obviously biased, no matter what anyone says. Same for if you only talk about the good things. In order to make a good review, you MUST discuss the good and bad points EQUALLY. Without this, the entire review is biased. You must also complete the entire game, if you are going to review it. Without playing through it in its entirety, you will never be able to give it a fair review.

More often than not, whether it be a game, movie, show, etc., it will usually always start dull and boring, as well as in different people's opinions, bad. It is all opinion-based. The story is then gradually built up, though for some people they think it builds up too slow. This is most often the case for people who are impatient and would like to finish the story ASAP. The best way to build up a story and its characters, is to have a slow, gradual buildup.

This turned out longer than expected, but it is the truth, that a lot of you are probably too stubborn to learn from.

I'm not saying it has to be fast paced, heart in your throat action but if a game is boring for hours that's a bad thing. It's like my friends who keep trying to get me to read Lord of the Rings admitting that the first 12 chapters of the first book are boring, saying it gets good halfway through is not a point in it's favour(this has nothing to do with how much I enjoy reading btw, I love it it's one of my favourite pastimes). Why would you be okay with "dull" and "boring". I don't pay 60 euro a game to be bored. It's okay to get off to a slow start but to actually bore me, that's definitely a bad thing.

They should just remake FF6 for the PS3 and then everyone will have to admit it is the best FF in the series.

bells:
RPG's aren't short. Playing 5 hours in a decent RPG is not the same as playing 5 Hours of Bayonetta.

Yahtze played Heavy Rain and Mass Effect 2, why couldn't you delay your review to give the game a proper chance? Sure, you probably won't like it yet, but at this point you really shouldn't bother even trying... My point is: If you want to do a game review about a game you don't like, at least amke yourself avaliable to the experience of the game.

If not you're just "Angry Video Game Nerd" that talks fast. And ZP is a much better show than that.

I mean, c'mon man... FF13 is a game that takes about 30-40 hours to clear if you rush to the ending. So let's talk Mass Effect 2, Fable 2 and Oblivion these can be finnished i what? 15-30 hours? I think i'm even being generous here.

So, play 3 hours of Fable 2, Play 3 Hours of Mass Effect 2, Play 3 Hours of Oblivion. These are all Westerns Action Rpg's. You'll probably like them more because they are more likely the flavors you like. That's fair. But you know full damn well that your opinion of the game wouldn't be fair. Nor your criticism.

FF13 is Linear untill quite a bit later on, The Story is Jdrama but the characters do evolve quite nicely. The battle system tries to be fast and entertaining but also challenging (as the difficulty raises you have to get strategic about it). It slow in the start. Yes, and that's a flaw that was pointed around EVERYWHERE. But if you are trying to make a review of it, you should at the very least try to accept the game.

I know you were busy, but you really want people to believe you came to this game without knowing all the criticism about? C'mon... this entire video was like you reading troll comments from people who didn't even play the damn thing.

What i'm saying is that if you're not willing to give any game it's honest chance, please don't review it. You can totally hate FF13 and JRPG's and criticize it all you want, it's fine. It's Fair. It's your job. But doing so with such a poorly made setup is a disservice to Zero Punctuation and it's fanbase.

The difference is that within the first three hours Mass Effect 2, Oblivion and Fable 2 get interesting (admittedly Fable 2 just barely). If after five hours of playing I don't like a game I know I wouldn't keep playing it. I do not hate jrpgs, my hard drive is packed with old SNES jrpgs, more recently than that I love the Atelier Iris series. Just so you don't start accusing me of being biased.

tony2077:

Kwatsu:

tony2077:

Kwatsu:
I've played FFXIII for over thirty hours now, I'm on the third disc, and quite frankly, I'm STILL waiting for it to get good.

you must not be a jrpg fan so move on

I played and enjoyed FFX (though I hated FFX-2), FFXII, Shadow Hearts Covenant, Final Fantasy Tactics and A2, and Kingdom Hearts, so while I wouldn't call myself a fan, I do enjoy them. What bugs me is that there IS a good game in here somewhere, it's like the game just won't let me get to it. :(

well it seem you like jrpg maybe this one isn't your style maybe its time to move on and try a different one

Well, it's not like I didn't give it a fair chance. I like the battle system, that's actually fun, but the rest of the game... Maybe I'll take some time away and play something else.

Lord_Gremlin:
The funny thing is... He's right about this game. People who "enjoy" it just way too familiar with ridiculous bullshit to actually notice that game is crap...

Milking fans, Square, always milking fans...

Or it could that opinions are subjective. For example, I didn't like FF6 as much as I did 10.

The end animation credits on this video made me laugh more than the rest of the review, not that it wasn't a fun review its just I could see all the frustration for this game (and maybe even the whole series) been vented on this one character =3

-M

Wounded Melody:
They should just remake FF6 for the PS3 and then everyone will have to admit it is the best FF in the series.

Agreed 120%!
altho a remake will be pointless, they should focus on once again making a descent FF for a change.

Mr.Lucifer:

Lord_Gremlin:
The funny thing is... He's right about this game. People who "enjoy" it just way too familiar with ridiculous bullshit to actually notice that game is crap...

Milking fans, Square, always milking fans...

Or it could that opinions are subjective. For example, I didn't like FF6 as much as I did 10.

just so you know just because you hate something doesn't make it crap

Nocturnal Gentleman:

Why do you feel like just because I said I didn't finish the games means I pretty much gave up on it near the beginning? When I drop a game like final fantasy it can be anywhere from about 15 hours in to 40 or more. I damn near played both to the end but then lost interest and didn't beat them. Also, no I'm not going back to playing something I felt sucked. That makes no sense and I would probably only dislike them even more now.

Also there is no "real FF game". I treat all the games like stand alone games not like anything that has to adhere to traits of previous games. To me seven through nine bored me and I would not hold them up as the high points of the series. While I don't feel like six is the best rpg out there I can agree that it is one of the better of the series. Still doesn't change the fact I like twelve more.

Also watching zero punctuation does not show people what games are the paramount of taste and which ones aren't. I like some of the games ZP holds highly and also have enjoyed ones that were torn apart. Doesn't mean I have no taste just that they're different. I just watch ZP for the laughs which was what I thought was the purpose all along.

Also, by saying I sound like some mother like figure that means you've been coming off as a childish jerk spouting nonsense. You know it is very possible to say you don't like this game or those games without feeling the need to insult those who enjoyed them. You think all the FFs previous to ten were amazing. I don't. Why does it matter?

Don't try to change my opinions on what's good and what isn't because you will fail from the start. I will play what I like, and you will play what you like. That's all it comes down to and all that matters.

Lets say you played 10 installments and quit before the final boss in each since you did not like any of them, and for some arbitrary reason you liked one. You obviously don't like the Final Fantasy theme at all, you liked #12, not because it was FF but for it being a game that pleased your specific needs, might as well have been called "The adventures of captain Balthier and his Foxy Bunny" and it would have made little or no difference to your opinion of it.

I see you as a motherly figure since you come rushing to defend someone with a knife on your mouth like I was trying to murder him, I wasnt even talking to you at the moment. Also, looking at my previous posts I never insulted him or anybody (except the games themselves) and here you are calling me a childish jerk, is it me or that Nerd Rage is getting to you?

Finally, the whole point of a forum is to expose different arguments and try to prove to each other why our points of view are valid. If you don't like me when I state that previous installments of FF were Greatly better than the new ones and I invite others to see for themselves by playing the classics, then you are obviously not open for discussion... shouldn't even be reading a forum at all. <_<'

tony2077:

just so you know just because you hate something doesn't make it crap

But if at least 80% of the people DO think is crap, then it has a very promising possibility of it being actually a dripping bowl of crud.

Tetranitrophenol:

tony2077:

just so you know just because you hate something doesn't make it crap

But if at least 80% of the people DO think is crap, then it has a very promising possibility of it being actually a dripping bowl of crud.

what about the 20% that like the game do they just disappear then no so my point still stands

Didn't Yahtzee say something about this in Borderlands? Something about people shouting that he's misinterpreted his own opinion?

I love how the comments section actually isn't even about the video, it's a battlefield for the lovers and haters of FF13.

OT: Great vid, Yahtzee!

tony2077:
what about the 20% that like the game do they just disappear then no so my point still stands

No, it means that ether they have odd tastes in games, or they are in a state of denial; trying to convince themselves that the game is good just because its called Final Fantasy, its made by Square Enix and it simply MUST be a "Diamond farting wonder"!!!

Tetranitrophenol:

tony2077:
what about the 20% that like the game do they just disappear then no so my point still stands

No, it means that ether they have odd tastes in games, or they are in a state of denial; trying to convince themselves that the game is good just because its called Final Fantasy, its made by Square Enix and it simply MUST be a "Diamond farting wonder"!!!

or it could be they like the game and that won't change no matter how many time you hit them in the face with something nah it couldn't be that a little humor if you missed that

All true, all hilarious. Loved every second. Could not stop laughing. Thank god someone's not a mindless brainwashed zombie to this crappy game. <3

Tetranitrophenol:

tony2077:

just so you know just because you hate something doesn't make it crap

But if at least 80% of the people DO think is crap, then it has a very promising possibility of it being actually a dripping bowl of crud.

/Agreed.

J-Alfred:

I love how the comments section actually isn't even about the video, it's a battlefield for the lovers and haters of FF13.

and what's the video about?

Tetranitrophenol:

J-Alfred:

I love how the comments section actually isn't even about the video, it's a battlefield for the lovers and haters of FF13.

and what's the video about?

Well, to put it bluntly, it's about Yahtzee saying what we've all come to expect him to say; he didn't like it. I'm just saying that everyone here is kind of ignoring what Yahtzee said because it wasn't a surprise, choosing instead to debate its merits with the other escapist members.

Jesus, what's up with all the nostalgia tinted glasses in here? Do any of you even remember FF4? You find a magical ship. That takes you to the MOON. Who's on the moon? A bunch of Namingways who happen to own a shop. Not to mention the god of the summons; Bahamut, and of course, the bad guy. I'm not even going to go into FF6 and 8, I think you can already see where I'm going. The Final Fantasy series is hardly led by the storyline, so don't pretend the old ones were good and life was better back in the day.

To be fair, I think that whilst Yahtzee does point out the stereotypical nature of the characters the fact that he couldn't be bothered to do his job and play the game means he doesn't see how they develop (and don't pretend they don't). FF13 seems to me to be the first FF to actually deal with characters that aren't 2D. Seldom during the series are any characters seen to change with events (beyond getting depressed for a bit and making your friends chase you around for a while). This isn't the case in FF13. Instead of just showing bland predictable reactions to events (Mum dies, get sad) the characters make meaningful decisions and develop actual relationships with the other characters.

Anyway, my point is this. Final Fantasy 13 is appallingly bad, yes, but there are signs of improvement from 12. If they'd just revert back to a system where I can have full control of all of my characters in battle and where I can roam the world and play mini-games and actually have fun then I'm pretty sure it would once again be "good". Then again, there are always the nostalgia tinted glasses to make people hate whatever comes next.

(Oh, and I thought FFX wasn't too bad. Appreciated it a lot more on my second playthrough. That's the thing about opinions, they're irrelevant without analysis and knowledge.)

Tetranitrophenol:

J-Alfred:

I love how the comments section actually isn't even about the video, it's a battlefield for the lovers and haters of FF13.

and what's the video about?

It's about Yahtzee challenging a Final Fantasy game to hook him within 5 fucking hours, which is over 3/4ths the length of the average game, and watching Final Fantasy fail miserably - partly because Yahtzee's standards are obnoxiously high and partly because Final Fantasy games never learned what narrative pacing is.

And that's what the video is about.

Infalk:
Jesus, what's up with all the nostalgia tinted glasses in here? Do any of you even remember FF4? You find a magical ship. That takes you to the MOON. Who's on the moon? A bunch of Namingways who happen to own a shop. Not to mention the god of the summons; Bahamut, and of course, the bad guy. I'm not even going to go into FF6 and 8, I think you can already see where I'm going. The Final Fantasy series is hardly led by the storyline, so don't pretend the old ones were good and life was better back in the day.

But that's not *just* what FF4 is about. At least you could tell what was going on without having to look up info on it, like I've had to do with FF13.

Wounded Melody:

Infalk:
Jesus, what's up with all the nostalgia tinted glasses in here? Do any of you even remember FF4? You find a magical ship. That takes you to the MOON. Who's on the moon? A bunch of Namingways who happen to own a shop. Not to mention the god of the summons; Bahamut, and of course, the bad guy. I'm not even going to go into FF6 and 8, I think you can already see where I'm going. The Final Fantasy series is hardly led by the storyline, so don't pretend the old ones were good and life was better back in the day.

But that's not *just* what FF4 is about. At least you could tell what was going on without having to look up info on it, like I've had to do with FF13.

That doesn't make it a good story though. Come on if any of the FF plots were released as novels they'd be a massive flop. Seriously, people who think any FF had a fantastic story was either playing a different series than me or is a drooling moron. They can be entertaining yes, so was Avatar, doesn't mean they have an original, hugely engrossing storyline.

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