Zero Punctuation: Just Cause 2

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Nearly forgot that it's Wednesday. Yay!

I loved the "Just 'Cause!" smarmy retorts complete with squinty-faced Yahtzee, thought the inserted bear pic was a good laugh and where the hell did Yahtzee find a pic of a chip sandwich?! Oh, looks like he found it here:

...how'd he think to even look for one...and how brilliant is the photo-stock world for being able to offer one up?! :D

As for the game, sounds like one gets the same fulfillment from playing as one gets from watching a Michael Bay film: it's a fun ride while it lasts and blowing shit up is cool especially when you blow EVERYTHING up though, in the end, there's not a lot of filling once the smoke and napalm fumes clear.

Another game that I might just have to buy....DOH..or perhaps YIPEE!

TheyTookOurJobs:
I've just realised how much like mercenaries 2 this game is...

No co-op though, that would have been epic.

Yay for cats!
Also, I loved that picture of a bear and the way he kept giving the main character more and more ludicrous titles.

Why you ask? Just Cause! 2!

lol, great review! A shame that Link's hookshot can't do that much.

CATS!!!
why?
JUST CAUSE!

aw very funny!

I know he acknowledged it but I'm going to bring it up (again) anyway. There sure were a lot of cats in this review.

More to the point, the game mechanics look fun, but it's hard to imagine there's a lot of depth to a game where your only goal is to destroy stuff. Even GTA didn't always give a mission of mass sabotage.

The best video in a while! Well done.

Best show in a while.

+8

This was the funniest in a while.

Why? Just Cause!

JEBWrench:

A1:
Okay Yahtzee. You've implied before, particularly in your Saint's Row 2 review for example, that fun is all that's needed in a game. Now you seem to be implying the opposite. So WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?

I didn't get that at all. It seemed to me he enjoyed it.

Why?

Because he said it was really fun.

Okay. I guess I'll spell it out even though I probably shouldn't have to.

"The story and dialogue are absolute tripe on a bike but apparently I'm the only one who cares."

Note that he actually says that he cares. And next with regard to the fun part:

"Some might say that's enough. Some might say I'm too hard to please. But some can shut their fucking mouths."

So it would seem that we have yet another Yahtzee consistency problem. Or at least another Yahtzee consistency question.

That was a lot of cats. Don't know why but the riding the dolphin rocket image cracked me up. Also the whole rift at the end was great. Awesome review.

Shooting cats out of trees you say...

ZeeClone:
And NOW it's mid-week.

Thanks Yahtzee!

HELL YEAH, been waiting for this an entire week, just to feel good. God I missed his voice.

Either way, I am glad he enjoyed the game except the story, because hell, I feel exactly the same. I tried the DEMO and I was HOOKED, I couldn't believe the insanity involving. Jumping from a boeing towards a smaller jet was fucking amazing.

This is why you don't enforce PAID demos, you corperate fatcats. It's because free things generate advertising and interest in the game. Like it did with me.

Okay, Yahtzee MUST have gotten himself a cat, or the publisher's club decided to pull some kind of late april fools...

Anyways, here's a little bit of fun for the next time a new ZP comes out: Make sure you can't hear it and see if you can guess what he's saying. Makes for a good way to kill time, AND it's an excuse to see it twice as well! Great review by the way, Yahtzee. I've already got this game, and to be honest, nuking the bases is becoming a grind...

So many kitty cats! The game actually looks like a decent borrow for the summer.

man, can't remember the last time ZP was this good.

This is by far the best review in recent memory. I too picked up on the over-use of Just 'Cause, the crazy boss fight where he orders a missile strike ON HIS OWN HEAD, and the gut wrenchingly annoying cutscene black market crap where you order one thing at a time:
grenades please
C4 please
submachine gun please
Rocket launcher please
car please, oops drove car worth 75000 off the edge of the cliff to firey death 10 seconds after buying it - back to family sedans it is!
The review was spot on on all counts, and yes, blowing things up with careless abandon is ALWAYS enough.

There that's enough licking boot for one day, bring on the next review I say!

"That's right. The best way to survive smacking into concrete at terminal velocity....is to smack into it slightly faster. Maybe it's a homeopathic thing."

I was glad I wasn't eating anything when I heard it...I would've made a terrible mess.

A1:

Okay. I guess I'll spell it out even though I probably shouldn't have to.

"The story and dialogue are absolute tripe on a bike but apparently I'm the only one who cares."

Note that he actually says that he cares. And next with regard to the fun part:

"Some might say that's enough. Some might say I'm too hard to please. But some can shut their fucking mouths."

So it would seem that we have yet another Yahtzee consistency problem. Or at least another Yahtzee consistency question.

I still don't agree with you. I'd tell some people to shut their fucking mouths regardless of whether or not they agreed with me. Because most people ought to.

As for story and dialogue? It sounded to me like he was saying that they could be significantly better, but it really doesn't matter.

Funny review, I really like the idea of magic hookshot and parachute!

Well, he did not only mention cats a lot, but also pussies. (okay, it is only a different word for cat but still...)

To be honest, its a great game, I'm currently 29 hours in and only about 19% completion, too much to fart about with and do to focus on the story.

And I'm sold...is there a PC version?

Awesome review, just cause!

I suspected I wasn't the only one who immediately started calling the grappling hook a "hookshot", cause that's what it fucking IS!

rembrandtqeinstein:
And I'm sold...is there a PC version?

Yes.

I laughed a bit too loudly in the silent library and the jet-powered dolphin and the bear.

Also I like the way he pronounced "Mars".

Dok Zombie approves.

I think this review would have been so much better in high quality.... *sarchasm at the new publishers club*

miquelfire:
Lots of cats.

Oddly enough, I almost want to get this game now.

Me too. Funny review too! :D

Amazing, this may be the first time I've absolutely agreed with everything the man has said. Of course, I've played well over 70 hours by now, so any drawbacks are obviously outweighed by the benefits.

addeB:

rembrandtqeinstein:
And I'm sold...is there a PC version?

Yes.

And it's not just a crappy port either. It's quite nice.

Yahtzee I would like to let you know that I love you. You gave this game a well written, well thought-out and an HONEST review unlike that fuck Greg Tito who was too busy to actually play the game and too stupid to figure out the controls! Thanks bud, you're the best.

He's VERY energetic this week. This was one of the more dynamic reviews in a while.

JEBWrench:

A1:

Okay. I guess I'll spell it out even though I probably shouldn't have to.

"The story and dialogue are absolute tripe on a bike but apparently I'm the only one who cares."

Note that he actually says that he cares. And next with regard to the fun part:

"Some might say that's enough. Some might say I'm too hard to please. But some can shut their fucking mouths."

So it would seem that we have yet another Yahtzee consistency problem. Or at least another Yahtzee consistency question.

I still don't agree with you. I'd tell some people to shut their fucking mouths regardless of whether or not they agreed with me. Because most people ought to.

As for story and dialogue? It sounded to me like he was saying that they could be significantly better, but it really doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter what you would do. What matters here is what Yahtzee is doing.

And Yahtzee never said that the story and dialogue problems don't matter. He didn't even say anything to that effect.

Could you please stop being constrained by your own opinion?

cmon do shattered memories!!!!!

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