Zero Punctuation: Splinter Cell: Conviction

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tburke0:
If you just ban everyone who posts in the first 5 minutes of the thread, why not just lock the thread for 5 minutes?

its because of stuff like this.

Mrselfdestruct:
!!!!!!!

stublu:
and?

The plot sounds every bit as contrived as the story for a season of 24, so I'll definitely be giving this a pass.

Well done on both the review and the novel, Yahtzee.

I kinda like the chain kill option. It's hard to line up enemies like that when you are free playing. Maybe I just like being pampered b-cuz I'm American. I think I might get that book.

Lilliputian Yahtzee: strangely adorable?

Based on what Yahtzee said, this game sounds like a series of QTEs integrated into actual gameplay rather than being part of cutscenes...

Sounds pretty awful.

Haah. I haven't played any of the Splinter Cell games since the first one, but I'm glad to hear that the AI still hasn't caught up with, well, anything. I still fondly remember leaving a bloodied body in the middle of a room, a terrorist coming in and screaming, "HE MUST BE CLOSE!" and began scouring the room. After walking around, blankly staring into some shadows, he said, "It was probably nothing," and began walking towards the door, completely forgetting about his fallen comrade.

Nice little ad about you're book you popped in there. Sneaky bastard. XD

The_AC:
Pretty nice review. This game might be worse than I was hoping. How is the gameplay relative to Splinter Cell Chaos Theory?

Comparing the 2 is pointless - gameplay styles are both different, although Conviction is very much about stealth despite what the naysayers may claim. Just not the same kind of stealth.

A couple of things:

- Reed wants the Vice President to become President, Reed himself doesn't want to be President.

- It says Sam is 5'10" on the front of the Double Agent box.

Use to like splinter cell...Well the first two anyway. It got pretty old after that so not too supriced. Feels like souless grind to play now. Now if there was a little man on Fishers back, that would be fun.

Thanks for the crack at my place of residence. It's always nice to know that blind hate at Quebec will be present with everyone regardless of whether they've been there or not.

I understand what you mean about stealth, though. My experiences with stealth are pretty limited but I always preferred to simply run by them rather than kill or 'knock out' guards. One thing that's always bothered me, though? Why, in video games, are there no fat, lazy security guards who do nothing more than sit in their office?

The little cartoon at the end was very clever.

He teared this one apart. Great review even a game im not iterested in, i got a little interested in double agent, thief and hitman.

Why the intro and ending music have to be so much louder than the review itself, im wearing my headphones, i have to turn down the volume, turn it up and the down againg.

Damn, now I want to play hungry hungry hippos.

Haven't laughed this hard at a review in awhile, nice one.

Very sneaky cheeky little self advertisement their at the end. I almost didn't notice it it was so sly.

Legion:
Fair points on the bad stuff (I actually agree with all of them pretty much) but no mention of any of the good things. I know this isn't uncommon, but still.

tburke0:
If you just ban everyone who posts in the first 5 minutes of the thread, why not just lock the thread for 5 minutes?

That's... actually a good point. They do it with official news stuff sometimes, where you can't comment straight away.

I think you may have missed the part when Yahtzee said that holding down a button to go into stealth mode works well. And even if there were things that can be classified as good in your own personal opinion it doesn't really seem to matter all that much because they don't seem to be enough to save the game as far as Yahtzee is concerned.

tburke0:
If you just ban everyone who posts in the first 5 minutes of the thread, why not just lock the thread for 5 minutes?

Because they figure that people are smart enough to watch the video first to comment on it. And when they aren't they don't let them hang around here.

Now I'd like to see something in Half-Life 2 where you really need to stealth. I mean, there was that one house off to the side on Highway 17, but you can never actually disappear once you've been spotted. Is that something only in stealth games or do you guys know of any others that actually let you get out of sight and confuse the guards that aren't stealth games by genre?

I'm somewhat suprised to see that Yahtzee shares my view on Splinter Cell series - I love stealth games, but Splinter Cell never grew on me, mostly due to extreme linearity. It ruins it for me, turning a open-ended land of options and posibilities into a set of moves that need to be executed in a specific order to move to the next room. Half the fun of a stealth game is picking your method and approach...

The biggest thing I got out of this review is that Yahtzee likes Hitman. Therefore, he is a god.

Anyway, good review. Touched on the problems I had with the game. Still, It was a lot better than Double Agent.

i want a picture of the minigun crotch for an avatar

lol Montreal

I was crossing my fingers hoping for Monster Hunter Tri, but I guess that'll never come
Funny how tree green circles make Sam Fisher easy to recognize
The shameless plug at the end was hilarious, btw

Lowbreed:
I didn't even realise that there was a new splinter cell, they're like Guitar hero's now...

You've got to be kidding - this is the first one in 3 years.

Finished the game yesterday. Almost everything Yahtzee said about this one is spot on, but it was still an enjoyable rental.

I wonder how the story writers will go about wringing another installment out of this series, now that pretty much every even half-interesting loose end in the overarching storyline has been tied up.

He likes to make fun of North America alot for some reason. Anyway, great episode as always. I especially liked the end credits with the Christmas tree.

Mmmmmm.... delicious shameless plug....which I would totally follow up on except that I'm broke.

Great video, better than the last few. I am very pleased that you have gotten back to your indiscriminate hate! Let it shine through, sir, let it shine!

My only experience with splinter cell was one of the early games when I was very young. I had to sneak around a burning building. Fire hurts and I couldn't really get the hang of it.

Returned to the video store to rent something else fairly quickly.

Needless to say I wouldn't call myself a fan of the series but I may be able to deal with it now being a veteran of Demon's Souls thus having raised my patience.

I totally agree - even though I enjoyed some of the earlier SC games, Conviction was just stupid.

I disagree with Ben's review of Conviction (this is most certainly more a personal gripe for him about all Splinter Cell games than a subjective view) however the jokes and entertainment factor are still at their best :)

So Conviction is really that easy? I'm disappointed.

But the stealth mechanics got progressively more complex(in the 1st 3 games before) so it's beyond me why Yahtzee doesn't seem to like them. It's not like you stood a fighting chance most of the time they spotted you.

Heh, it was a reasonably good review. nothing particularly stood out for me in that review, he was just metaphorically quite creative.

and he mentioned Sam Fishers height, but not the fact that he seems to be getting younger... least he looked younger in the game trailers i saw than he did on the box-art of the first splintercell... but what do i know, i hate sneaking franchises because they scare me more than Horror ones...

You think Montreal is stupid! BOO! They also made your prince of persia trilogy you realize.

Good video though,

YAY!!! HE FINALLY DID SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION!!!
...
...
It was an alright video. Can't wait for next week.

Man, I hate it when the last drop goes down my leg...

The rip on America was genius. Ubisoft really just needs to return SC to the classic formula of all stealth all the time. They keep wanting to stick with this action focus, which goes against what made SC popular.

good stuff ill check out the book i think.

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