Zero Punctuation: Splinter Cell: Conviction

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I_AM_BATMAN:
Great review.

Hitman is the best stealth game series!

Haha, Made my day when he said "Thief or Hitman" Just bought the collection pack. The hotel in contracts was most fun i've had in a game.

FUCK YES!

Yahtzee is BACK!

Whats a Father Christmas? AMERICAAAAA!!!!!
jk.

OT: Haven't played this game yet, it looks good. The only reason Ubisoft made it so easy was because the original games were to hard for the majority of people to play, they made it easier so they could get more money.

Wtf? all you people saying Splinter Cell has always been weak on stealth? you have got to be jokeing.Yes Concivtion is weak in the stealth deparment but it needed to change with the times.Seriouly do you all think MetalGearSolid was a better stealth game series? If you do your fulling yourself.I like both series but splintercell up till conviction kicks metalgears ass in the steath department.
Also im sure this will get me flamed but Yathzee must not have been paying much attention to the story or he would have known that the bad guys were tring to kill the president so the vice president could take over.Funny review never the less and he can hate on America all he wants but we still get our games way before Australia.

tburke0:
All I'm asking is, if there's a rule that all posts before 12:05 are pulled, why not lock the thread? And yes, I waited until I could post in the first 5 minutes on a Wednesday to make my point... hurr durr...

Well, one part of the reason is that letting people get banned for things easy to catch means we have less people who ignore rules getting banned for harder to find offenses.

And the rule isn't that they can't post within 5 minutes, the rule is "no first posting". However, mods are human, and sometimes may ban before reading in the case of ZP threads. I think we've mostly stopped that these days though.

When you post something like "I enjoyed/hated this review" before it was physically possible to enjoy the review, then the only reason you are posting is to be a first post, or for something else equally inane.

If you post something legitimate and on topic (Random example of a rare post that actually contributes some discussion to a zp thread) then it doesn't matter when you post it. The end result is it is a very rare post outside of a problem report with the video that can be considered to be anything other then a "first post" in this context.

Also, if we did a 5 minute lock, we would still have the same problem with idiots waiting for the unlock to spam the thread in pursuit of a first post.

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Self comedy is good for you. noone complained when southpark made fun of finland either

Another episode of Zero Punctuation!! I was glad I could watch this before spending eight hours in a car going to a relatives house.

But, yeah, great review. I've never been a fan of SC but, I've only played Pandora Tomorrow. It was still a good episode though.

P.S. How the FUCK could you like Hitman: Blood Money?!? That game was an utter embarrassment IMO. (don't ban me!)

WolfmanNougat:
Opening with a TMNT reference? Didn't see that one coming!

Wait, you've gone through the whitehouse many times in video games and nobody's kicked up a fuss (as far as I'm aware, at least), yet as soon as a humble church gets involved in a virtual firefight, the Christians roll out the "Videogames are teh sacrelige" banners?
I guess Obama really is the only level-headed person left in America, then.

Also, I'd say the reason America is always being taken over in fiction is because they're so in love with themselves that they think everyone wants a piece because they are equally in love. Of course, this game being made in Canada kinda derails that idea a bit.

Keep in mind that in Doctor Who, London is a suspiciously common target for any and all alien invasions, and in La Jetee the focus is entirely on Paris' destruction without a peep about all the other cities of the world. America neither invented nor patented this particular expression of nationalism in media, and I'll thank you if you consider that fact before jumping to the conclusion that Americans are somehow uniquely stupid about their national pride.

Looks like he didn't play KZ2 seeing how he praised the cover system.

Come to think of it, why didn't he review KZ2?

Mad Stalin:

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Self comedy is good for you. noone complained when southpark made fun of finland either

South Park makes fun of everything.

You don't see Yahtzee constantly taking pot shots at himself or the countries he lives/lived in.

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Actually, those two bits (the "savages you every time you try to give it free health care" line and the plug for Mogworld)got the loudest laughs out of me in the entire video. So YMMV.

Yahtzee seems to me to be more of an all-purpose basher anyway, making fun of every nationality when the opportunity arises, including his own.

...because that's how politics work!

DurianBlink:
South Park makes fun of everything.

You don't see Yahtzee constantly taking pot shots at himself or the countries he lives/lived in.

Wait, are we talking about the same Yahtzee here? The one I know takes shots at himself about once a video, and has blasted both Britain and Australia on multiple occasions. Remember Manhunt, when he said that Australia's government "has this habit of trying pathetically hard to jump onto bandwagon issues that roll in from real countries [USA and UK]"? Or his "no one likes the British, either" in The Saboteur?

DurianBlink:

Mad Stalin:

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Self comedy is good for you. noone complained when southpark made fun of finland either

South Park makes fun of everything.

You don't see Yahtzee constantly taking pot shots at himself or the countries he lives/lived in.

Actually, you do. Australia's anti-game policy and release dates have been bashed many times, for example, and he nailed himself many times before as well (as in that he's rubbish in bed and so forth).

It is so sad that my favourite video game franchise has become so weak.

I love the first Splinter Cell and Chaos Theory. That was where the real stealth occurred and you had to be clever but had options to kill or not to kill.

Conviction was all about killing lots of people.

The review amused me but missed out on the two key things that irritated me the most:
1. You can no longer move bodies around. This was one of the main stealth aspects of Splinter Cell up until now.

2. The save system blows. Terribly. It's worse than the one in Dead Rising.

I liked the game, but you're review was pretty spot on.

Oh, and can there be one review where you don't take time out to go, "America sucks and all Americans are retarded nazis"

FoolKiller:
...

The review amused me but missed out on the two key things that irritated me the most:
1. You can no longer move bodies around. This was one of the main stealth aspects of Splinter Cell up until now.
...

Really? I'm surprised they'd remove a feature like that at this stage. I mean, Assassin's Creed II ADDED that feature when it wasn't in Screed 1. I'm honestly perplexed by this and can see why you'd be irritated.

Meh. This one was entertaining, but not necessarily that funny. I guess that most of that comes from being hung-up on this part: O:41. (To comment on that bit, though: Damn straight we will.)

agreed with everything Yahtzee on this one

Mad Stalin:

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Self comedy is good for you. noone complained when southpark made fun of finland either

Yeah, normally that'd be true, but personally I'd have to agree with Durian here. Even I usually get a laugh out of the times when he does that stuff, like constantly portraying Americans with cowboy hats, or what have you, but here it didn't really seem funny.

Lowbreed:
I didn't even realise that there was a new splinter cell, they're like Guitar hero's now...

Well not like I ever cared for them anyway, great review. Lol'd at the last line.

No they aren't...There hasn't been a new splinter cell in like 4 years.

Awesome review, you make good points but I still adore this game, it's simply fun.

I have always liked splinter series but every version that I have played has some sort of problems. In my view all of the splinters have been released half done what comes to the coding. Last one that stopped my splinter experiences was the double agent. The hacking device-thingy... well I never saw the textures of the hacking device = useless game that I cannot play.

And that AI of splinter(s)... ... I just agree. Yahtzee has said it: it is hard to program any AI, but all this shooting and saying after 5 seconds "must be my imagination" is so much seen on games. But it would kinda suck donky kong balls if the AI really hunted you down if they see you, or would it now? I hate "sneaking" games that don't allow that option through the entire game.

Most funniest thing still is the three bright glowing green lights on the guys head... How can you not see him AI???

Also it would be nice to see like italians and spanish fighting (to save the world). Put that to ANY game. I am waiting something like that just to hear the arguments and general dialogs of any of the guards (even without subtitles).

The America insult was a bit done a bit sloppy. Felt pretty tacked on. But the rest of the review was great.

BigZ225:
Lol, its true what he says about Tom clancys involvement and the crazy plot

Please dont ban me i got like 5 RP's going

Why would that protect you from anything? And you don't have to worry if you actually watch the whole video through.

OT: The controls were a bit annoying when it came to climbing walls and such. If you weren't aimed on the exact spot, or a few centimeters off, it wouldn't work, which sucks. It'd be better if you could walk over to a wall, aim anywhere, and then climb.

I also have to note I find it amusing and slightly annoying how much you insult America when you know a good portion of your viewers are indeed American. At least you insulted Canada this time too, haha.

K4RN4GE911:
Another episode of Zero Punctuation!! I was glad I ... P.S. How the FUCK could you like Hitman: Blood Money?!? That game was an utter embarrassment IMO. (don't ban me!)

Hmm. Interesting. I was actually thinking: how does it differ from the previous ones? I have played them all and Blood Money was mostly the same thing than previous ones. Blood bath or sneaking and mostly very playable.

Ps. Eight hours of car? That is ridiculous amount of sitting in a car. :/ Feel sorry for you. :)

I live in Montreal.
People here are retards.
Spot on, Yahtzee.

I'm glad he made such a nuanced review on it:P

Heheh... like that little nudge to Braid in the middle of it, also, we've seen references to hitman games before, but now it's finally official that Yahtzee actually likes them.

wow, extra bitter. this game must truly suck ass.

I've been a Splinter Cell fan since the first one came out all those years ago...but yes I do agree with lots of what you said there :)

I assume the next Extra Punctuation will be on Stealth, then?

lucky i didn't buy it, or the console either lol ! XD

Your reviews are always very amusing, haha.
any chance of reviewing Metro 2033 at some point?

DurianBlink:
Wow Yahtzee, you're really cool shamelessly bashing the country that most of your viewers are from. It doesn't help that the people from here pay you to make these videos too. And then you actually have the balls to flash an advertisement of your book at the end.

We get it. You don't like America. You don't have to keep repeating it to all of your viewers in every video you make. Keep your political bias out of your videos. All it does is alienate viewers.

Yeah no kidding. What a childish analogy. I mean... you do realize that you are endlessly bashing the country that not only gives you a better job....but basically funds a vast majority of the worlds economy.

Not to mention that every time a new problem arises everyone is always quite eager to dump it into America's lap and then immediately begin dissing it for taking on the responsibility. What a joke.

It is ok to resent a country for succeeding I suppose....free speech and all that....but it doesn't make it any less childish and petty.

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