Zero Punctuation: Dead to Rights: Retribution

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I'm pretty sure I love you. Will you marry me?

I really liked that part about Buffalo Bill. xD

That was a Dead to Rights: Really good review. Hope Rebeccas song turns out well.

I enjoyed this Dead to Rights: Review.

If this game attracted more attention, I'm sure the whole dog vs crotch thing would become some kind of meme. As it is, Hyper magazine here in Aus (whom Yahtzee wrote for back in the day) referred to it as a 'scrotality'. They said 'sack attack' was an honourable second.

Really though, this doesn't strike me as the kind of game that would have had a fiercely loyal fanbase clamouring for a remake and rejoicing on its arrival. Which begs the question "why bother?".

I'm just wondering. When you were talking about the game talking about its morals, and it was standing on a box of soap or something, was that a reference to Fight Club or were you just trying to fuck with us?

The sequel could be those bad guys getting the same operation John Bobbit did. They could call it "Dead to Rights: Re-dickulous". And for that, I'll have to pay Dead to Rights : Reparations.

Funny stuff.

Was it just me, or was Rebecca Mayes thing at the end edited to all hell. As in, after every couple of words.

The original dead to rights had camp coming out of it's ears. It had (among other things):

- A mob boss given the voice of a really bad Christopher Walken-impersonator.
- More one-liners than a whole box of action movies.
- A stripping minigame (with no stripping in it).
- A boss called Longshoreman X who fights you with in full fisherman gear wielding a crossbow.
- A disarm where you bend a guys arm behind his back and shoots him into the air with his own shotgun.
- A dog who can rush into a firefight, eat a dude and bring you his gun.

If you have no interest in actually playing it you can always watch this: http://lparchive.org/LetsPlay/Dead%20to%20Rights/

Great video, just pre-ordered the book as well ^^

Dead to Rights: Regurgitated has now passed through the cheese grater sphincter that is Yahtzee's unforgiving critical repertoire.

And made my day.

Nice Silence of the Lambs reference.

I bet Dead to Rights:Retribution is Dead to Rights:Retarded. Shame it can't Dead to Rights:Redeem itself.

Tolerant Fanboy:
"Pain is God and I am Pope" is actually a very good battle cry.

Truth.

Why did you waste your time reviewing that game when you could have reviewed Lost Planet 2 for at least 10 seconds.

Dectilon:
The original dead to rights had camp coming out of it's ears. It had (among other things):

- A mob boss given the voice of a really bad Christopher Walken-impersonator.
- More one-liners than a whole box of action movies.
- A stripping minigame (with no stripping in it).
- A boss called Longshoreman X who fights you with in full fisherman gear wielding a crossbow.
- A disarm where you bend a guys arm behind his back and shoots him into the air with his own shotgun.
- A dog who can rush into a firefight, eat a dude and bring you his gun.

If you have no interest in actually playing it you can always watch this: http://lparchive.org/LetsPlay/Dead%20to%20Rights/

One of my favorite Let's Plays. There is not a single frame of Dead to Rights which cannot be ridiculed. Jack could have been wearing a clown suit and tutu the entire time and it wouldn't have made him any less realistic or more hilarious of a character than he already was.

Yahtzee forgot about Aliens Vs Predator REquiem. I Swear those RE in beginning are in almost every sequel without a number!

Yahtzee made a good point though. We need more games where we play as a cat, dog or other assorted animal. Deadly Creatures came close.

Hah. Good stuff as always Yahtzee! Bonus kudos for you for using Sobieski vodka image in the review. Polish vodka = good choice :P

Anyway, let's now all forget about this uninteresting game, ans start playing Dead To Rights: Red Dead Redemption (It comes out tomorrow in Poland, I can't wait to get my hands on it).

Wait... Was that a Freakazoid! reference in one of the last title cards?

Therumancer:
I'm slightly confused by this one to some extent.


I have no interest in this game, and will likely never buy it, and It's not that I didn't expect Yahtzee to not rip it a new one... I mean that's what he does. But I'm wondering why all of this insane, gleeful, over the top destruction and death inflicted by a goverment agent is treated so differantly here than with "Just Cause 2".

I have managed to get a cheap copy of JC-2, which kind of surprised me. I've been playing it on and off and having more fun than I expected. The idea of it appeals to me more for whatever reason than a generic "hard boiled cop" story. However from what Yahtzee is saying about over the top and absurd violence... well... he praised pretty much everything he said was wrong with Dead To Rights, in his Just Cause 2 review, or that is how it looks to me.

Having never played this game, I'm wondering if it's some kind of horrible mechanics, making all of this violence boring? Or the fact that I'm guessing it's linear (as opposed to a sandbox game), or what? I mean you can't even say that Rico (from JC-2) is a more realistic character or anything as the entire game is over the top, and the dude can absorb crazy amounts of punishment as well, not to mention defy the laws of physics almost as well as Neo rewriting The Matrix. Rico is pretty much as over-the top macho as a character can get without being Duke Nukem.

It might just be me, I don't expect Yahtzee to be consistant (inconsistancy is arguably part of his charm) but here it just gets me for some reason.

I think it has more to do with the fact that Rico's mission from the start is to cause chaos, where as Jack is peddling a moral but cant even follow it himself

no dolphins, but I liked the baby sandwiches.
Cheers mate.

The first game was awesome. Since the series is no longer made by Namco, they've sucked ever since.

While the game itself sounds fun to play (nothing gets my motor revving like shooting the shit out of shit for a shitload of umm... shit time?), the whole camera shaking business is not my bag baby.

The Iconnorclast:
That was a Dead to Rights: Really good review. Hope Rebeccas song turns out well.

I hope she does the video part "Yahtzee style"!

And his gun speaks only one loud word =)

um...

*sigh* one of your better videos as of late, but WHY is our local muse doing a song on Yahtzee?

That seems entirely unnecessary, and I would rather NOT see the result of this plastered all over the escapist, much less have her tagged to the end of an episode asking US for ideas!

The one thing I liked in the original Dead to Rights was the combat system, don't remember using guns that much. Kind of stupid taking the one cool thing and replacing it with guns, which were only cool decades ago!

last week he knew this would be awful and avoided it... seriously he thought he'd do it this week? wow... just wow. he's lost it.

-shakes head at yahtzee- what's next weeks, going to just check see which game reviewed the absolute worst and review that...

you avoided this for nier, that says about as much as anything... yahtzee.. just stop reviewing. it's becoming as obvious the the Duke of Edinburgh when faced with an african.

you had alan wake, monster hunter, age of conan expansion, starcraft 2 beta, Sin and Punishment 2, Lost Planet 2 ... and you went for a game you took a shot at last week.

sigh.

this game looks dead to rights: repulsive.

Must admit, putting Rebecca together with Yahtzee feels a little like putting a Smurf with a pirahna . . . a hat floating on the water, a melancholy little blue stain beneath it, and that's the last we'll ever see of Yahtzee. ;)

Thanks for the vid, I enjoyed it - I doubt I'd ever play the game anyway, but I agree with you that double (story) standards built into the game mechanics create a bad gaming experience.

"...where pain is God and Jack Slate is pope." -just awesome.

To be honest, while I admire that Yahtzee is finally finding a chance to expand upon himself as a human being, this whole Yahtzee and Mayes thing could become a problem. If Yahtzee falls in love, he will lose all of his soul-less murderous contempt for any game which does not meet his standards and will promptly take a much nicer opinion of the world. And that funny shit is what we love about him!

Truly "Pain is God and Jack Slate is Pope" is the best line ever!

Dead to Rights :Remarkable :P

I've seen it four or five times and love this episode.

"They should change the name to something like Dead to Rights Remake or Dead to Rights Revisionism, let's just hope it doesn't end up Dead to Rights Retarded, that'd be Dead to Rights Regrettable."
Made my day.

isit jsut me or did this appear way early in the UK (3 pm)?

deplorable:
last week he knew this would be awful and avoided it... seriously he thought he'd do it this week? wow... just wow. he's lost it.

-shakes head at yahtzee- what's next weeks, going to just check see which game reviewed the absolute worst and review that...

you avoided this for nier, that says about as much as anything... yahtzee.. just stop reviewing. it's becoming as obvious the the Duke of Edinburgh when faced with an african.

you had alan wake, monster hunter, age of conan expansion, starcraft 2 beta, Sin and Punishment 2, Lost Planet 2 ... and you went for a game you took a shot at last week.

sigh.

Because he's funnier when he insults a bad game than when he praises a good one. And why would he review a beta? And wasn't Lost Planet 2 also poorly reviewed? I would like to see him review Monster Hunter Tri, though.

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