Stolen Pixels #206: Whose Side Am I on, Anyway?

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Stolen Pixels #206: Whose Side Am I on, Anyway?

Calling the plot of Alpha Protocol "complicated" is like calling a bonfire fire "slightly warm."

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This comic reminds me of the many times I tried to make heads or tails of the movie Primer. Or the ending of Basic (a misleading title if ever there was one). Con-Fu-Sing.

Yeah, hard to folow isn't it.

I'd like to see a spy film which depicts the complete collapse of world's governments, World War III, and the downfall of human civilization - all because in the opening scene the protagonist shoots down Mi-24 heli in 90s Russia, and a janitor killed by it was actually A VERY IMPORTANT GUYTM.

I know that feeling...I never got her character, she just turns up and he suddenly has romantic intrest...without knowing a thing!

This comic totally sounds like something you'd hear in Archer, that last line especially.

Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

Yes a Spy game that keeps u guessing! good job

I actually thought it was fairly straightforward, though I never did figure out precisely why certain factions like G22 were involved (though the full dossier entry for Alpha Protocol has given me some... interesting ideas about their possible origin). Well, straightforward in the sense that yeah, it's a tad convoluted at the beginning of each specific operation but by the end you have a fairly clear picture of what you were trying to accomplish. Italy was probably the vaguest initially, as all you know is there's an Al-Samad cell active but not why or how that relates to the PMC that is secretly evil. Still, easy enough to figure out what was going on, and you'll know why if you hack the various laptops you find in the last mission.

If you'd been playing the game in small chunks though I can see how that might make it harder to keep things straight. I can't say I ever got any of the various characters mixed up though, they're not especially "samey" after all. Especially the female characters (all of whom you can sleep with, you actually get a perk for doing just that which gives you an additional 5 AP points. Well, all the female characters who talk anyways.).

mmm... escher pretzel...

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

The gameplay doesn't look bad to me, though. And I mean, there's got to be some fun in being a dick to everyone you meet, right? If it dips below something like 20, I might give it a buy.

Awesome, truly awesome.
I haven't played the game and I don't know that I will (not enough time for games right now and I'll probably forget about it later, unless it turns out to be an amazing game that sticks around forever), but this comic made me laugh.

I won't link it because I'm not a horrible person, but I will say: TV Tropes: Xanatos Gambit.

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

Except it wasn't, and I am getting increasingly worried that Shamus has been playing a completely different game to the people that actually played Alpha Protocol...

The storyline isn't that hard to follow, but after the ammount of ramming my head into a brick wall I've had trying to explain the utterly simple storylines in games like Modern Warfare 2 and Borderlands, I'm both unsurprised at this development and uninterested in trying to explain it.

Sparrow:

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

The gameplay doesn't look bad to me, though. And I mean, there's got to be some fun in being a dick to everyone you meet, right? If it dips below something like 20, I might give it a buy.

I think Mass Effect 1 + 2 would meet that little dick inside of you better. Renegade is awesome in Mass Effect as some of it has far reaching consequences if you choose to import.

Chipperz:

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

Except it wasn't, and I am getting increasingly worried that Shamus has been playing a completely different game to the people that actually played Alpha Protocol...

The storyline isn't that hard to follow, but after the ammount of ramming my head into a brick wall I've had trying to explain the utterly simple storylines in games like Modern Warfare 2 and Borderlands, I'm both unsurprised at this development and uninterested in trying to explain it.

Opinions differ my friend. I played it and it just horrible, not to my surprise when Escapist features news that one unknown dev said the game is a failure. Might be true or not, I warned my Japanese girlfriend all the way in Tokio of the game and she got it. Her experiences were the same, after one day she ditched it. Money wasted.

Either way, if you loved it, props to you.

Straying Bullet:

Sparrow:

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

The gameplay doesn't look bad to me, though. And I mean, there's got to be some fun in being a dick to everyone you meet, right? If it dips below something like 20, I might give it a buy.

I think Mass Effect 1 + 2 would meet that little dick inside of you better. Renegade is awesome in Mass Effect as some of it has far reaching consequences if you choose to import.

Worry not. I own both, and have hit the same reporter twice in one character.

There's got to be some kind of arrest scene for criminal intent for the third time... that is, if you're not longer a Spectre. Die, C-Sec, die!

Sparrow:

Straying Bullet:

Sparrow:

Straying Bullet:
Like I said, this game is a disaster. Ohwait..Did I bring down the wrath of many people on my nec now?! D:

The gameplay doesn't look bad to me, though. And I mean, there's got to be some fun in being a dick to everyone you meet, right? If it dips below something like 20, I might give it a buy.

I think Mass Effect 1 + 2 would meet that little dick inside of you better. Renegade is awesome in Mass Effect as some of it has far reaching consequences if you choose to import.

Worry not. I own both, and have hit the same reporter twice in one character.

There's got to be some kind of arrest scene for criminal intent for the third time... that is, if you're not longer a Spectre. Die, C-Sec, die!

Worry not, I have always beaten that reporter regardless of my morality. Granted, I once opted to diss her completly but in ME2 I always made up to smash her into the face.

I just wished the dialogue allowed this:

What does Five Finga's say to the FACE?!...SLAP!

Haha, I love the reporter's expression in the last panel

"Oh God, what did I deserve to get this idiot dumped on my head?"

Jaredin:
I know that feeling...I never got her character, she just turns up and he suddenly has romantic intrest...without knowing a thing!

Sounds like most men. "You're female. Let's shag."

But yeah, this is convoluted. It helps when a game comes with a built in notebook for you to write down what you're doing to who and why. "Kill X because Y says they work for Z. Capture instead of kill X because A says Y works for Z. Nuke planet from orbit, because A, X, and Y all work for Z, and Z works for B, and B is resurrecting the Old One C."

WhiteTigerShiro:
This comic totally sounds like something you'd hear in Archer, that last line especially.

And after reading that in the voices from Archer, I laughed harder then ever.

How much of a canuck does it make me that I read the first line "Horton" instead of Throton?

I want M.C.Escher pretzels.

AvsJoe:
This comic reminds me of the many times I tried to make heads or tails of the movie Primer. Or the ending of Basic (a misleading title if ever there was one). Con-Fu-Sing.

Primer is an excellent film!
Plot line:
Two dudes find time travel > shit happens > they go their separate ways.
Simples ^_^

new_age_reject:

AvsJoe:
This comic reminds me of the many times I tried to make heads or tails of the movie Primer.

Primer is an excellent film!
Plot line:
Two dudes find time travel > shit happens > they go their separate ways.
Simples ^_^

I totally get it nao! Thanx, d00d!

so its like reading a book one page at a time. but skipping the next page and burning the one you read so you cant go back because only wimps that are idiots do that. If the police come over seeing you burn the books then you tell them that its for science and that you heard a gun shot over at your neighbor's house and before telling the police this you put fake blood on their walls. while doing this though you noticed you needed to do something better with your life so you start reading books...

is that how the plots like?

nondescript:

Jaredin:
I know that feeling...I never got her character, she just turns up and he suddenly has romantic intrest...without knowing a thing!

Sounds like most men. "You're female. Let's shag."

But yeah, this is convoluted. It helps when a game comes with a built in notebook for you to write down what you're doing to who and why. "Kill X because Y says they work for Z. Capture instead of kill X because A says Y works for Z. Nuke planet from orbit, because A, X, and Y all work for Z, and Z works for B, and B is resurrecting the Old One C."

that actually made alot of sense and amazingly sounds like half of the fantasy games except for the nuke part.

I still don't get why people think Alpha Protocol's plot is so damn confusing. Now... trying to sort through all of the middle-english in Chaucer's Canterbury Tales... now THAT'S confusing.

TheDoctor455:
I still don't get why people think Alpha Protocol's plot is so damn confusing. Now... trying to sort through all of the middle-english in Chaucer's Canterbury Tales... now THAT'S confusing.

The Canterbury Tales is generally pretty easy to understand if you read it aloud, remembering it was written before the Great Vowel Shift. And the plot isn't exactly complex either - most of these tales would fit neatly into an episode of Seinfeld.

Primer, on the other hand, is awesome. You have no idea what's going on, but if you sit down afterward and think about it, you can figure it out.

Would have thought one of his thingamajigs would record all that.

Jaredin:
I know that feeling...I never got her character, she just turns up and he suddenly has romantic intrest...without knowing a thing!

Well I doubt it's romantic, but close enough.

I couldn't follow the story at all. I just gave up.

BUT, I could appreciate how complex and well written it was; but I was just too lazy to comprehend it.

You know, you don't really need to say "bonfire fire"...

Still can't decide on this game!

One question to those that have played it; how exactly are missions broken up? Are they, for example, similar to ME2 where you'll walk through an area with conversations then sent to another section (on that same planet) with combat (and some conversations thrown in)?

The hub system they go on about has confused me a little on that.

Woodsey:
One question to those that have played it; how exactly are missions broken up? through ?

The hub system they go on about has confused me a little on that.

You go to your door and select what mission to play. Basically, hubs are where your armor locker(Your inventory managment), EMail(Messages), and Clearing House(Shop) are.

Straying Bullet:
"...when Escapist features news that one unknown dev said the game is a failure..."

To be completely fair, he just said that management and the politics of Alpha Protocol's development was borked by management stuff. He just said the final product(Glitches,texture issues all that tech stuff) was not good, but he never bashed the game itself. The development of AP was borked, but the dev never said the game was bad. It's just that ALMOST EVERYONE(Regardless of who played it, because people think they can join the trash train without a ticket!) is shitting on this game, despite the fact that Alpha Protocol's doing stuff that actually puts stuff like Dragon Age and Mass Effect to shame, and no one seems to give a shit because it looks a bit messed up.

as bad a game this has been reviewed to be, I still wanna give it a try...even if I probably won't actually finish it haha

It's even been rumoured there will still be a patch.

http://gamebanshee.com/news/98401-gb-feature-obsidians-plans-for-alpha-protocol-patches-and-dlc.html

If fixed this might be good. I'll wait and see.

If you approach the game expecting an FPS (or Mass Effect 2, since that's almost an FPS), I can understand some disappointment.

It's not an FPS. It's an RPG. Your skill selections actually matter. Taking your time and strategising works (especially if you're playing a stealthy character, as you'd expect). And the game is fecking awesome.

(And the plot made perfect sense to me -- but then I did play it in a few marathon sessions.)

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