LoadingReadyRun: Conan's Witnesses

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I could go for some diet crack right now.

If they showed up at my door, I would join them in a heartbeat. Battle-axe in hand. As long as they promise to stay far away from sequels involving Grace Jones.

Sharp editing, gents! One of the best back-and-forth sketches so far.

From watching both Conan films and the animated tv series I remember the featured deities. Crom, The Four Winds, Dagoth the Dreaming God, and the Stygian serpent lord Set. I would die laughing if this actually happened to me or I'd joke and say I've already accepted "insert conan deity here" into my life.

The credits are wrong, it should be

BOOM!
Paul Saunders!

And oh those wacky Satanists!

what is best in life?

maple sugar pie

finally someone gets it.

ITS CRUM CRUM NOT CROM WATCH THE F*ING MOVIE

jp201:
what is best in life?

maple sugar pie

finally someone gets it.

Except they're wrong. Butter tarts are the best thing in life.

And LRR's people call themselves Canadian. BAH.

Great work, lady and gents! If that second evangelist group had come to my door first, things might have been different for me...

Cutlesnap:

Crunchy English:
First to the LRR Crew: Nicely done. To hit the highlights real quick, lapel pin of the bastard sword, the reference to cuneiform, Kathleen's creepy look at the end there. Jeremy's performance was more or less perfect actually, but its difficult to pull out a specific moment.

To the Escapist community (well, some of you anyway) - If psychosis is something that attracts you to women? I think I know why your last relationship failed. Try women who don't lick their lips at the thought of bloodthirsty murder and you might be able to make it work.

Psychosis may not make for good relationships, but it makes for excellent sex! Bloodthirsty Kathleen is even hotter than newsready Kathleen.

Agreed Cutlesnap! Though Im not one that does enjoy a biter... ouch and also, one who claws extremely deep =/

Awesome video, just when I thought there was a limit to the humour, you pull off "diet crack" haha

So Crom does absolutely nothing for his followers, probably doesn't even exist, and inspires violence towards people the followers don't agree with... Are youguys sure this wasn't supposed to be about Christianity?

Great video, as always.

After the credits was the best part... amazing.

Oooh, shiny swords. I want to follow Crom, I can Barbarian my enemies!

Wow... Kathleen can be very... persuasive... especially with naked steel in her hand...

Have you ever considered a career in the Church? :P

Great stuff guys :D
Made my Monday!

Ooh, I love the double meaning in "Never twice in the same day."

You guys never fail. Keep it up!

the ending was fantastic keep them coming

greatest call back

Kudos to Kathleen, she was pretty scary with those eyes of hers! And I loved the punchline!! "Hello? Neighborhood watch?"

I had hoped for a door to door (I think that was the name of it) reference. that was the first LRR video I saw and it had me in stiches. as did this one. LRR never fail to have me guffawing on every line. well, not EVERY line, just most of them.

MowDownJoe:
As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, I probably shouldn't have even watched that video & although it was mildly amusing, I found it offensive at best.

Otherwise, you guys aren't too bad, this was just in bad taste. Kthxbai.

I don't see how this was in bad taste.
Nothing we did in the video was at all making jokes about (or even referencing) Jehovah's Witnesses.

The video's title was merely to illustrate that the characters in the video are door-to-door evangelists for their given religion, something the JWs are known for. It certainly didn't disparage what the JWs do.

The entire video is saying that a religion based on a fictional god like Crom would be ridiculous. It says nothing about Jehovah's Witnesses.

Kathleen's crazy eyes...

I knew that was going to be the stinger, I could feel it in my gut.

Kathleen with a sword is probably the absolute best thing ever. Second only to maple suger pie (I must try that sometime...)

Good to see Paul got in (if only for a few seconds...WE NEED MORE OF HIM DAMNIT!)

Seventh Actuality:
The bit where Kathleen draws the sword and licks her lips like that just gave me a huge, creepy crush on her.

Damn.

ditto lol

yet another awesome video guys :D

Hey! It's the Door to Door Stanists!

I loved your work as alway's guys! I guess I need to see the Conan movies and such to really get them but I got the point of them. The bit at the end after the credit's was awesome too. I would join up but I already have a god... Slaanesh! :D

lol i remember you guys talking about "the lamentations of the women" in one of the podcasts a while back

PAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!

I love Kathleen. I'm so sold on Crom.

For the after credits sting I was totally expecting Jenova's Witnesses >.>

My favorite bunch of very funny Canadians teamed up with my favorite Hyborean god, Crom.

And is the teacher, "Mr. Howard" a ref to a real teacher or a ref to the Conan novels author Robert E. Howard?

If the latter then I salute your meta humor mastery extraordinaire. If not, then...Hey! Funny line!

Stinger was a great call back! Did Matt and Kathleen up up getting beers and watching Conan? Cause if not, I may feel a li'l bit cheated.

Kathleen's look of creepy enthusiasm was awesome!

is it me or are the credits a bit....jittery

GrahamS:

MowDownJoe:
As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, I probably shouldn't have even watched that video & although it was mildly amusing, I found it offensive at best.

Otherwise, you guys aren't too bad, this was just in bad taste. Kthxbai.

I don't see how this was in bad taste.
Nothing we did in the video was at all making jokes about (or even referencing) Jehovah's Witnesses.

The video's title was merely to illustrate that the characters in the video are door-to-door evangelists for their given religion, something the JWs are known for. It certainly didn't disparage what the JWs do.

The entire video is saying that a religion based on a fictional god like Crom would be ridiculous. It says nothing about Jehovah's Witnesses.

Agreed. I just quoted your post to say that you're misattributing that quote. I did NOT say that.
And really... anything you do nowadays is likely to offend someone. Look at Steve Jobs pissing off left-handers all over the world with the new iPhone!

I almost thought that this reminded me of the Door to Door video a few years back.. Then it was confirmed by the stinger reference! =D

I quite liked that old video, so this was a rather nice callback.. But for CROM, CRUSHER OF SOULS!

What is best in life, indeed..

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