Zero Punctuation: Transformers: War for Cybertron

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It's not a cover shooter. Why do people keep insisting?

101194:

Ricky Cabrera:
this is just to make the "FIRST!!" people cry

Clever.

ZP:

Clever, But mean. Half of us grew up on transformers no reason to diss the entire series just for one game.

Yes, diss it for it's shitty movies, all the other shitty games, the shitty comics, the shitty cartoon and fucking Beast Wars. Just because you liked something as a child doesn't make it good. Haven't you noticed that children are stupid yet?

I am 28, and I do own a Transformers duvet cover. I used it to cover my dealer table at the British Transformers convention in Birmingham, but I was still just a little bit creeped out when it seemed like Yahtzee was talking to me directly.

Sadly, I reckon the review was spot on. Transforming wasn't used as effectively as it could have been, the enemy types are depressingly similar cookie cutters, everything's bloody *grey* apart from the characters' faction-oriented highlights and there's almost no difference in the play styles between the Autobot and Decepticon campaigns. I got genuinely annoyed when I started up as Optimus Prime and saw Bumblebee and Ratchet blasting away at crippled, defenceless Decepticon troopers. Oi! We're supposed to be the good guys!

I agree that the best part of it is the dialogue, though. I would totally watch the cutscenes on their own and just skip the shooter bits in between.

-Nick

This is one of the most artistically varied ZPs I've seen in a while.

First off, we get the parody of abstract B&W Eastern European animation, which was great.

Then we get the robots done in ZP style, which only seems dead simple if you've never tried to do this sort of thing yourself.

But then appears Robot Grandma, complete with robot gray hair in done up a robot bun. Can't explain why, but that little detail really impressed me.

ARGH! THE STREETS WILL FLOW WITH THE BLOOD OF NON-BELIEVERS! LOL Just Kidding.

Funny review as always.

I myself loved this game, granted I used to love Transformers as a kid too, and the game on the PS2.

I bought it on release, fired up the single player and played a couple of hours, and absolutely loved it. Only game I finished this year. It was a fun straight forward, kinda challenging 3rd person shooter and the pacing kept me going, never a dull moment for me. I found myself using vehicle mode quite often during boss battles to make sure I didn't get hit (always playing on the hardest difficulty I find in a game). Then after a few chapters I started the multiplayer now this is what made the game amazing to me, but also made me hate it. The action is absolutely amazing, felt a bit like Unreal Tournament, but there were so many problems with the multiplayer I stopped playing it after a few weeks. I wonder if they patched it, cause I would love to give it another go.

Man, what a nice incoherent piece of text I produced here.

Probably been said already but would the type of people who like transformers even know what Othello was other than something they heard about once when they were in school...

My favorite bit was the cardboard box, holding a staff and yelling "You shall not pass!".

Seriously, I think the transformers game could've been the opposite to "big bads vs you the midget" games; instead being a larger than life smashathon. Instead of the bosses being super huge to you, everything else is supposed to feel tiny.

Did the game do that well? I don't know near... anything... about the game, and the premise is enough keeps me from even trying (pretty much the same as how a lot of people would react to a Twilight video game).

I mean, c'mon... giant robots from Giant-Robot World 3 can have battles in space and across time instead decide to settle down on Earth and just, I don't know, fight over the pyramids... or the Eifle Tower...

Just saw the review, and I have to be honest, Yahtzee, thank you so much for insulting Shia LeBoeuf twice for me. My night is officially complete!

*ahem*

I haven't played War for Cybertron yet, but I'll admit it looks ok. Not groundbreaking, but like Section 8, it's enough to hold my attention.

Twas a fun little episode.

Enjoy your vacation, Mr.Croshaw. I hope I'll get a chance to read your book...

Great review this game was hugely overrated by the "mainstream" game journalists (probably the nostalgia speaking) I've played it for an hour then decided that it sucked donkey balls.
I couldn't see 10ft in front of me the entire screen was one big cluster fuck of conjoined brown and grey shapes.

I loved the game, but I freely admit to being a huge Transformer fanboy. I've been buying the toys, comics and videos/DVD's since 1984 and never stopped, it's just my thing and I feel no shame in admitting it.

The thing about this game is that it isn't for people who don't care about the characters and the mythos, it's for people like me that are fans of the series or shooter fans who might want a break from WWII or Space Marines fighting oversized bugs. Yes, that does limit the audience a bit but no more than releasing a stealth based game that punishes a player for going outside the parameters of sneaking without killing or flight sim.

Not every game is made to appeal to everyone. So while I disagree with most of the negative comments about War for Cybertron and the Transformers in general, I admit it is a niche game and license that won't hold the same appeal to the general public that it does for me. However, that doesn't negate my opinion the same that my love of the franchise doesn't negate the opinion of Yahtzee or those that agree with him.

(I wonder, can I still say I'm a fanboy even though I don't flame people who disagree with me or just come out and say " you're wrong, it's the best game EVAH! You just don't like it cause you're ghey!" or something like that?"

You are going on holiday, so you won't release new video when it's needed the most? Freakin new school year! Without any depression remedy there will be suicides all over the world.

Entertain ourselves for seven days? Don't you mean two? Anyway, have fun on your holiday, oppressing those South Pacific natives or whatever you said in your XP.

Anyway, there was actually a bunch of things I didn't understand about Transformers. Why did Megatron turn into a gun? Everyone transforms into cars and tanks and helicopters and whatnot, but they've all got guns built in already. Why was the leader of the pack the guy who transformed into a gun? And since he was supposed to be an enormous robot, how did he fit all that into something so tiny?

I have to say that video made me laugh. I kind of agree with it I never watched the tv show, didnt watch the movie, and didnt play the game because it never interested me. It just looked rather stupid to me.

From what iv heard especially at places like eb is that its been a long line of extremely shitty game and shitty movies based on a mediocre tv series, and thats comeing from the transformers fans. Its a game and series that if you didnt watch it as a kid your not going to ever give a shit about it.

Wait a second...in the caption picture and starting at 3:58...is that a VF-1 Valkyrie from Macross?

Nice oversight. Zing!

mental_looney:
Probably been said already but would the type of people who like transformers even know what Othello was other than something they heard about once when they were in school...

Yes, since many of us are well read and educated. The thing about fans of Transformers is that we don't exclude anyone like many other niche groups. We accept young, old, black, white, yellow, red, gay, straight, male, female, skinny, fat, educated or dropouts as fellow fans of the franchise. Really the only thing that causes any turmoil (which usually is played for laughs anyway) is when the subject of which generation (G1, G2, Beat Wars, Armada, Car Robots, etc.) is the best.

I know it was a joke, but I think it's funny that you make that generalization when my library of, as Yahtzee calls them, "proper, wordy books" would probably dwarf that of many who claim to be a fan of the written word.

I agree with Yahtzee. There isn't alot for new-comers if you ask me. I played the game to death and I certainly love the entire franchise yet I haven't bought anything except for the '80s cartoon DVD pack. This is just a prequel, an official canon story for the real devoted people out there.

It borrows ALOT from other games. It isn't bad, but there isn't something 'unique' about it either. Multiplayer is solid and hectic though.

Poor, poor Yahtzee having to do a Transformers review...

Poor man.

"Coloured PROUD red and FABULOUS purple... Respectively."

Favourite line!

Zero Serenity:
Wait a second...in the caption picture and starting at 3:58...is that a VF-1 Valkyrie from Macross?

Nice oversight. Zing!

The VF-1 was used to create the Jetfire toy in the G1 Transformers series. It was licensed out to Hasbro by Takatoru Toys which led to Matchbox not being able to release it as opart of it's Robotech line and that led to the VF-1S being created in it's place.

So no, it isn't an oversight. (Understandable though since many people think of Jetfire as the Blackbird from the second Michael Bay movie)

Lucane:

Not G. Ivingname:
~Snip

True, but you think that the Decepticons would instantly change their tactics from "shoot auto-bots" to "shoot anything that moves."

Well all of this is superseded by it's based off of toylines before making a backstory to tie it all together but,playing any shooter game will tell you it's a real bad idea to shoot at everything that moves before you figure out it's friend, foe, or a streetlamp becuase sooner or later you'd either get tired,paranoid,distracted or worse of all run out of ammo before they actually attack,Actually the wosrt cast scenario would be shooting a teammate at least in my book.

Ok, I give, you win.

14 days, yahtzee, 14DAYS!

I thought the demo was pretty fun. The review was funny as always.

RowdyRodimus:

Zero Serenity:
Wait a second...in the caption picture and starting at 3:58...is that a VF-1 Valkyrie from Macross?

Nice oversight. Zing!

The VF-1 was used to create the Jetfire toy in the G1 Transformers series. It was licensed out to Hasbro by Takatoru Toys which led to Matchbox not being able to release it as opart of it's Robotech line and that led to the VF-1S being created in it's place.

So no, it isn't an oversight. (Understandable though since many people think of Jetfire as the Blackbird from the second Michael Bay movie)

<-Obviously not a transformers fan.

Yahtzee Croshaw:
Blah blah, only made to sell toys, blah blah

Well, I knew you weren't going to like it, because even I (and ardent Transfan) wasn't really into it. However, I watch your videos for your...err, "creative" dialogue, and to find you falling back on such a well-trod and poorly supported fallacy is really disappointing.

Yes, it's true, someone found some cool toys, and said, "Make me a cartoon so I can sell these to kids." And that's how Transformers started, but it didn't last three seasons and include a feature length movie on the excess profits of toy sales alone. While there would always be a nagging bit of commercialism clinging to it, the animated series evolved into something more, and laid the ground work for future incarnations to be even better (e.g. Beast Wars).

So as you admittedly know little about Transformers, because you never watched, please stick to what you do know: videogames and colorfully absurd descriptions often involving genitals. Dump on the game mechanics all you want, but don't take cheap shots at source material to pad you video.

The show was actually inspiring to me when I was young. Er- younger. As someone who makes a series (not important lol) and writes novels (not published!), I appreciate the series for the inspiration...at the time.

But it all ends there.

Good insight on the game. I lol'd hard. I have no attachments whatsoever to the series, so I view this just like any original IP. That is, the hate seems pretty justified to me.

Pugiron:
Don't just blame not having Transformers as a kid. I am sure being Emglish has a lot to do with you hating fun. And don't say "British" as you were born, grew up, and died inside in England, not Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland. Overall a mildly funny game with extra points from most fans because of nostaligia.

And all I can say is "lolwat?"

oh no, a week without Zero Punctuation what a tragedy (sarcasm)

"This was game's chance to make me like transformers..."

You actually thought this game ever had a chance to ever not suck? People's egos will always get the best of them, and while game producers know that fans will buy shit just to validate their reality, shit will flow. Stop fucking up the majority vote you knob fanboys.

Good laughs as always

-S

BlueInkAlchemist:

101194:
Clever, But mean. Half of us grew up on transformers no reason to diss the entire series just for one game.

There's every reason. Nostalgia only exists as long as you keep the rose colored glasses on your face. Just because we grew up on something doesn't make it sacred.

That said, I loved Transformers as a kid. I still think it was better then than it is now, for various reasons, but that doesn't mean I'm going to get all butthurt when someone points out some of the flaws in it, i.e. making kids milk their parents for cash.

About the only thing I really liked about the original Transformers were the Dinobots and even they were not enough to keep me interested through the second season. The third season depended on you seeing the film to even to begin to understand what the blazes was going on and even then it wasn't that interesting. I actually found Beast Wars and Beast Machines MORE interesting then the original series--likely because they kept the character count down and had a somewhat interesting storyline.

I will say Beast Wars went off the rails with the 'we are on Earth in the distant past' song and dance and kind of went into a death spiral after that.

101194:

Clever, But mean. Half of us grew up on transformers no reason to diss the entire series just for one game.

I don't believe he did. I think he was commenting about the transformers fans who look past the game's failings because it's about transformers.

Good review though I thought. I haven't played the game because. I also missed transformers as a kid, so have no particular interest. I managed to watch the first film, though I was very close to walking out of the cinema at a few points. To paraphrase Yahtzee, with that film Michael Bay f***ed up the chance for me to become a fan.

Ah, it had such capacity for good, and yet, it was so forgettable that now I wonder why I bothered buying it. I do disagree on the size of the bosses though, the big dino-cannon who (spoilers) you have to destroy a critical part inside of and then fly out of while he transforms really does feel big at first, even though he feels massively scaled down for his boss battles on the ground.

I really wanted to like it, but they mucked up multiplayer so damn badly (I mean, no chat whatsoever? in team matches? seriously?) and didn't include a bunch of stuff they gave the console versions (I can't unlock preorder characters? I can't buy DLC? Seriously Activision, the hell? Why you gotta interfere with New Moon Studios like this, turn it into some junkfood-throwaway game instead of a decent tribute and an actually long-term-fun game?) that I just couldn't stick with it. Even when they gave us double multiplayer XP for that one weekend, I managed just the one or two matches before I got bored. There's hackers all over the damn place now and without a patch, it's just going to get worse/die off. Oh, and no dedicated servers, and when the host quits, the you're dumped out of the match. No XP. just dumped out.

Gotta remember that it's High Mood studio's first PC title, though, so perhaps that explains some of it. I heard about a podcast where a dev said they were working on supporting the PC version (main issue was finding a delivery method).

Nueemann:
Well, he'll be back in time to give Halo Reach a sound maiming, so I'll look forward to that. (I'll be buying the game, but I always enjoy his criticism.)

If he does... It will probably just be like Halo 3's review all over again...

I think the game was ok-ish, while a vehicle section would have made it more awesome, i wouldn't diss the game entirely. The visuals are sometimes stunning and the atmosphere drew me in sometimes, which is what i'd expect from a game. And no, i don't really care about Transformers in general.

Zero Serenity:

RowdyRodimus:

Zero Serenity:
Wait a second...in the caption picture and starting at 3:58...is that a VF-1 Valkyrie from Macross?

Nice oversight. Zing!

The VF-1 was used to create the Jetfire toy in the G1 Transformers series. It was licensed out to Hasbro by Takatoru Toys which led to Matchbox not being able to release it as opart of it's Robotech line and that led to the VF-1S being created in it's place.

So no, it isn't an oversight. (Understandable though since many people think of Jetfire as the Blackbird from the second Michael Bay movie)

<-Obviously not a transformers fan.

It's not a problem. My motto is if you learn one thing new everyday (no matter how useless it is) then you're doing well lol

Not G. Ivingname:

WOPR:
he explained that the whole reason behind the show was to sell us gimmicky toys... **looks at shelf of transformers collectibles** and admittedly I have to agree, but hey they kicked the crap out of GI Joe and Barbie (no offense people I'm just stating what sells WHICH IT DID!)

You know you just proved his "colored your milk machines and argued which was best" point right?

I was using myself as an example to prove his point, I've no clue why I still have those things but whatever, at least I can be one of THOSE people who can actually admit he's right (unlike those people who play and "enjoy" brawl despite their constant complaining of it's "combat system")

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