Escape to the Movies: Dungeons & Dragons

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I was able to sit through Wrath of the Dragon God. That's the highest complement I can make for it. The dragon at the end was pretty cool but not as good as in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

All this attention on DnD recently here on the Escapist... The Quiz, all the news, and now a retrospective. I might consider getting into it... maybe

I don't think it's time for a good DnD movie. Honestly there have been some in the past (but honestly I can't remember their names). What we really need is a GOOD DnD series on TV. I mean seriously the effects wouldn't even have to be that incredible to make it rock....a channel like Syfy could pull it off pretty easy and if done right it wouldn't be a total waste of time even on a low budget. What would be great is to have it on prime time instead of say another Merlin show (already had a fire breathing dragon in that show....probably could have made a decent DnD show on the same budget).

Xena/Hercules was really the closest we have come to DnD tv series so far and it was very popular. It didn't really center around different classes and focused on just a few characters. Still over time you had the thief (king of thieves in fact..awesome role), The bard (Gabrielle), the Warrioress (Xena), The fighter/barbarian (Hercules), The monk (I mean he never seemed to get any heh) Eollis *sp* and while you didn't seem to have any main characters that were mages or spellcasters (or priests for that matter) you did run into them from time to time.

Both shows were very close to what a good DnD show would be. I think to pull it off you would have a strong start with a party of 4-5 members (covering the range of fighter/mage/priest/theif/ranger) working together on a quest. The show would introduce all the characters while they work through a quest and interact and you get to know each of the characters personalities a bit. Throughout the series you see different quests as the band roams the land and sometimes you see back stories on characters or individual quests that they take as well. There could be an ultimate evil or quest they are working towards that and at the end of each season they have a final confrontation or make a big step towards the completion of their quest.

What would really make the show rock and draw people in would be to increase the abilities of the party members as the show progresses. While you wouldn't see a level up screen you could directly see the characters gaining in power and abilities. Mages/Priests would get no spells, Warriors would add new combat moves and become more impressive when fighting enemies (slow motion dodges, rapid attacks etc). Rangers would shoot more arrows in the same time and hit harder targets etc.

There are many fun parts to DnD but I'd say defining the characters and getting to know them (Even your own) is one, Seeing the characters gain in power as you play (and helping to control the path) is another and exploring and figuring out puzzles and quests is the last of the big 3. A television series could include all of those and in fact you could even go all american idle on the show and make it a sort of Choose your own Adventure TV series where the audience calls/texts or votes online for choices at the end of every show (altering what happens in the next episode by that choice).

There are a ton of ways to make a good DnD show and there is a very large audience out there that would watch it (not just DnD players if done right). My wife and most of my friends have never played DnD but they'd watch a show like mentioned above in a second.

I thought Dungeons & Dragons(2000) was pritty good for about half way through.

But i agree Benders Big Game is the best one so far, also another Riddick film i only like Pitch Black.

psrdirector:
monsterapocolipse movie, the game didnt do well

Exactly, it seems like a weird choice for a movie about miniatures, rater than a much more popular choice like 40k.
But hey I'm a privater press fan boy so I'm happy to see them get some recognition, with a tim burton movie no less. Still I think l would have liked to have seen a warmacine movie instead but monsters are probably more accessible to the movie public, kind of a full circle thing.

Eldan:
The only true D&D movies are "The Gamers" and "The Gamers II: Dorkness Rising". Every fan knows that.

Amen to that.
+ their "demon hunters" films are great world-of-darkness stuff :)

Eldan:
The only true D&D movies are "The Gamers" and "The Gamers II: Dorkness Rising". Every fan knows that.

yes, that.

The spatula of righteousness shall scramble the eggs of your malfeasance!

edit: though the real greatness of these might be in the many hilarious references, and thus be rather inaccessible to the uninitiated. I play DnD and i can't really imagine what these movies would be like for someone who does not.

Hey!! I liked those D&D movies! I thought they had character!
And what i hate is how they tryed to link D&D to suicide.
What about being a rockstar? Rockstars commit suicide. Should rocking hard be outlawed?
What about being in a marrage you dont enjoy? Im sure there have been thousands of suicides caused my failed marrages.

drisky:

psrdirector:
monsterapocolipse movie, the game didnt do well

Exactly, it seems like a weird choice for a movie about miniatures, rater than a much more popular choice like 40k.
But hey I'm a privater press fan boy so I'm happy to see them get some recognition, with a tim burton movie no less. Still I think l would have liked to have seen a warmacine movie instead but monsters are probably more accessible to the movie public, kind of a full circle thing.

And its only 2 years old, the game is so well obscure basicly, its not even in many game shops. 40K or Warhammer straight up would be much more well known.

...Im feeling so old now looking at some of them, heh

umm MB...what was that bit at the end about 'sadly' Tyler Perry has the same birthday as SMB...movie bob you gotta watch yo mouth man...seriously...

allyhewitt:
mazes and mosters was gone by spoony not a month ago. i'd recomend, but it is a truely god aweful movie though

Yep, I was going to mention that, too.

He did a thoroughly scathing riff on that piece of trash. It was Spoony's 'Fredric Wertham/Seduction of the Innocent' piece. He also points out how paper thin the plot is, and how someone who had been as mentally unstable as Tom Hanks' character would have eventually snapped anyway. It's your standard 1980's 'Insert Boogeyman' Puff Piece. I blame Senator Joe McCarthy for creating that crap; or at least bringing it into the 20th Century.

There's no reason for a D&D film. Bob even said the game doesn't have its own plot. It doesn't even have its own world. D&D is only a system, with classes and rules, and the rules wouldn't translate into a movie anyway. So a D&D movie could be any movie with Humans, Elves, Orcs, Dwarves, Halfings, etc in the roles of fighters, paladins, rogues, wizards, etc. That's been done. The only way to really make it D&D-specific is to make a comedy that references other parts of the game. Like The Gamers and its better sequel.

"This week MovieBob rolls for initiative and looks at a few D&D films! HAZAAAH!"

Shouldn't that be:

"... rolls a perception check ..."

And why did it take 80+ comments before this was pointed out. Come on, guys! :o)

you do know the escapist is NOT your own personal blog, right Bob? If you are going to put out something useless, please have it under intermission, which odly enough, would have been a more fitting video, or call the video Bob's Blog, or Bob's Update, or anything to show that you didn't feel like writing about any movie you saw recently.

tenny20ca:

Eldan:
The only true D&D movies are "The Gamers" and "The Gamers II: Dorkness Rising". Every fan knows that.

Anyway: what does D&D have to do with Maths? No idea of 4th ed changed that (I doubt it) but it's not really anything more than first grade addition and subtraction.

Nope if you can add up 3d6 (say 3+2+5) then you can play DnD in 4th edition(and 3rd). I'm sure it would be a great way to teach basic math skills to kids.
"You have 50 hp, the monster hits you for 10 damage, how much do you have left?"

http://loadingreadyrun.com/videos/view/332/Inside-DD-4th-Edition
I roll a natural 20 on my LoadingReadyRun video database.

Eldan:
The only true D&D movies are "The Gamers" and "The Gamers II: Dorkness Rising". Every fan knows that.

Anyway: what does D&D have to do with Maths? No idea of 4th ed changed that (I doubt it) but it's not really anything more than first grade addition and subtraction.

Exactly, and exactly. 'The Gamers' 1 and 2 were absolutely awesome, hilarious DnD based parodies that addressed all of the silliness and fun with playing the game while still providing a good story and STUFF. DEFINITELY watch them if you have not! I think they're even on Netflix...

And as for Math....I suck at math, and I hate it. I know it's useful, I'm glad it exists, and I'm happy for you if you enjoy it...but god am I terrible at it. But do I love DnD? Hell yes. As said, all of the math is only ever basic...counting up dice and keeping track of XP. If you have a good DM, they will do the most complex on-the-fly stuff. Ours doesn't even let us know what our hitpoints are during battle...he just gives us descriptions of how wounded we are to get a general idea, to help us focus on the fight (Though we can always tell when we're at 1 HP when he throws out the words 'bleeding from the anus').

You should try it again sometime. :)
*notices that you live in MA* Holy crap, technically you could come play with us! :P We only started a couple weeks ago, and have 3 newbie folks! You'd fit right in. ;)

He forgot about the only good D&D movie. The animated Dragonlance movie with Keifer Sutherland as Raistlin. :P

edthehyena:
There's no reason for a D&D film. Bob even said the game doesn't have its own plot. It doesn't even have its own world. D&D is only a system, with classes and rules, and the rules wouldn't translate into a movie anyway. So a D&D movie could be any movie with Humans, Elves, Orcs, Dwarves, Halfings, etc in the roles of fighters, paladins, rogues, wizards, etc. That's been done. The only way to really make it D&D-specific is to make a comedy that references other parts of the game. Like The Gamers and its better sequel.

They could, however, easily make a movie based on a campaign setting. A Drizzt movie would be easy, even if I think there's way too much combat in those books to really represent D&D as our group plays it.

Don't we already have Lord of the Rings?

Hey! I World of warcraft movie would be awesome! The warcraft lore is actually really good!

RiffRaff:
"This week MovieBob rolls for initiative and looks at a few D&D films! HAZAAAH!"

Shouldn't that be:

"... rolls a perception check ..."

And why did it take 80+ comments before this was pointed out. Come on, guys! :o)

Take your Pathfinder words out of our real D&D :P

Is there going to be a Battleship movie?? Seriously?? How the hell could they make an engaging story out of that??

DTWolfwood:
wait wtf, how do you make a movie out of Battleship? O.O

Presumably, you take ANY script set around a battleship and put the "BATTLESHIP" logo on the title screen ;)

In the case of this one, it's about The Navy fighting water-oriented aliens.

You know, if they really wanted to make a proper D&D film, they could always turn to the novels for storylines to butcher...ahem, adapt.

Flying-Emu:

dfphetteplace:
A movie could be done about the Drizzt Saga, but so help any one who tries and fails. If done wrong, they would be slain.

Absolutely NOT. The Drizzt saga is horrible: Drizzt has got to be one of the worst written characters in R.A. Salvatore's collection.

Blasphemy.

First off...

What the hell? I'm older than Bob?!

Second... The D&D sequel wasn't actually all that bad in my opinion. It wasn't the greatest fantasy movie ever (Dragonstorm takes the prize on that one) but it great compared to the first D&D movie.

addeB:
Hey! I World of warcraft movie would be awesome! The warcraft lore was actually really good... before BC made it jump the shark!

FIXED!

The Sword and the Sorcerer http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084749/ is THE classic d&d movie

It is super cheezy and super fun.

Falseprophet:

I remember reading an article on sword & sorcery anime years ago, with the best line being:

"While Record of Lodoss War is what every DM wishes his D&D campaign could be, Slayers is probably closer to how your campaign actually is."

On that note, Lodoss War, especially the original OAV, is close to being a D&D adaptation, since it was based on the authors' own original campaign setting.

Hahahahah I like that...

Both series are great, in my opinion. If I get a D&D game like either of them, I'm happy. It's when I get a D&D game that is a Medieval Excel Saga that I pack up and go home.

That was interesting but I would have rather heard your opinions on "The Town" or something else hitting the theaters this week. Guess I will have to check your blog.

Wait, that one directors name was Cholera? Did I hear that wrong?

Naheal:

BTW Bob, if you want to get into D&D, now's the time to do it. The majority of the irritating math that was in 2nd ed has been stripped away as of now. You could probably get into it really well should you find a good group.

Yeah... all that irritating Addition and Subtraction...

<--- 2nd edition supporter, will never move on.

I hate the d20 system, it's an insult to my intelligence.

See, the main problem with the D&D movies (aside from shitty effects, shitty acting and shitty story of course) is the fact that you can't really make a movie adaptation of D&D...because there's nothing to adapt. Dungeons and Dragons is a system. It's a series of rules that are used when playing a game.
There is no way to actually express this unless you for an Order of the Stick style self-reference, where the entire world knows it's governed by such rules. Either that or you have to set the movie in a setting that is easily recognizable. Like, say...Planescape! Oh man, a movie set in the Planescape setting would be fuckin' awesome. Just seeing Sigil done with modern day technologies and the Lady Of Pain flaying people's skins with her shadow and so on would be great. AND it'll never happen.

Now, movies like The Gamers (both of which were good, although the second one was MILES better), that's something that obviously works. Don't make a movie set IN the game, make a movie about people playing the game. Thing is, in this case you need to actually have the movie be made by people who are players themselves, otherwise it'll end up like the hilarious RPing sequences in Mazes and Monsters. (Come to think of it, for a movie about RPGs there was WAY not enough actual gaming shown.)

what a WoW movie? don't they have to hit warcraft 1, 2, and 3 first?

thank you movie bob, my inner geek is now sated and is curling up on it's mountain of treasure.

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