Escape to the Movies: Dungeons & Dragons

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The Light Skinned one:
So let me get this straight "The Town" a movie that has been held in high regard so far, comes out, Devil which looks like a cheesy horror flick came out, The American a spy thriller which is also critically acclaimed. Easy A with the always lovely Emma Stone,and even the horrific indulgence in narcissism that is I'm still here(like anyone gives a damn where Joaquin phoenix has been). And bob picks dungeons and f*ing dragons movies, even he will admit have they are awful, and they are not even recent films. If his point was to state how much we need a new D and D movie, well OK he does have a blog it is the place you would normally express that sort of thing. I was kinda hoping for a movie review, well no I was actually expecting a movie review but I get it sometimes you want to take time to think about a movie before reviewing it or something.

Actually, I think he's simply doing a video based on the fact that there have been several D&D related articles coinciding with the release of the new Red Box, which itself got an article on the Escapist, rather than any kind of lack of movies to review. Bob probably got asked by the staff to do so.

GamesB2:
I thought Chronicles of Riddick was an awesome film.

And Benders Game was epic!

I haven't seen the new D&D film but yeah the old one was plain bad...

And I hate the idea of a WoW film.

agree 100% glad i'm not the only one psyched about a new riddick movie, i've always considered chronicles to be a classic hampered only by a slightly crummy scrrenplay.

MovieBob:

DTWolfwood:
wait wtf, how do you make a movie out of Battleship? O.O

Presumably, you take ANY script set around a battleship and put the "BATTLESHIP" logo on the title screen ;)

In the case of this one, it's about The Navy fighting water-oriented aliens.

Can't be any worse than the upcoming "Asteroids" film.

They should do a movie based off the R A Salvatore books

I too admired from afar this fantasy game full of dice and numbers that my older brothers played. They only let me play once as some kind of troll with an electric tongue that couldn't use it because he was in a winter environment and it would freeze. (They pretty much just wanted to get rid of me I suspect)

Oh, and Bender's Big Score was the best Futurama movie, but who cares, the series is back!

There was a good D&D movie made.

It's called Dorkness Rising. Its about several friends getting together and playing D&D. The film switches from the players interacting to their adventure as they imagine it and while its meant to be a comedy it isn't about making fun of D&D but rather showing extream examples of the crazy things that can happen while playing like a lawful monk that is being played by a guy who would rather kill and steal or the bard who keeps dying over and over again.

The film is very low budget, like colledge film budget but it has some truely clever writting and the acting is decent enough. It's on Netflix watch instantly and i'm sure you can order online.

Seriously, if your looking for a good D&D movie then check out Dorkness Rising, if you can get past the lack of budget then theres a lot to love.

Zeeky_Santos:
Chronicles sucked. Ass. Copious amounts no less.
However, Pitch Black was made of more win than you could handle in one go.

I haven't watched it for a while and it definitely wasn't as good as Pitch Black.

However as Sci Fi films go it was quite awesome... and Vin Diesel was a great actor in it.

I'm fairly psyched for the new one.

I must have been the only person who watched this and got excited that there's a new riddick film :(

GamesB2:

Zeeky_Santos:
Chronicles sucked. Ass. Copious amounts no less.
However, Pitch Black was made of more win than you could handle in one go.

I haven't watched it for a while and it definitely wasn't as good as Pitch Black.

However as Sci Fi films go it was quite awesome... and Vin Diesel was a great actor in it.

I'm fairly psyched for the new one.

True, I look forward to it, I hope it's better than the last one now that he's the leader of those necromancy dudes.

Dear Bob,

Chronicles of Riddick was a fine movie and certainly deserving of a sequel.

Any rebuttal to this can be systematically shot down with three words: The. Last. Airbender.

Well, most movie makers are pretty lazy, so making a movie about the D&D universe is to much work, as the story it self is created by the individual Dungeon Master with no assosiation with a general D&D storyline. Blizzard on the other hand has created a large folklore with alot of stories for the movie creators to use. So it is easier for movie-writers to use WoW as a movie, which makes it a more atractive to filmatize.

Honestly, I think the very best media translation of classic D&D, at it's heart and soul, was that one episode of Dexter's Laboratory. It was goofy, funny and just laughs the whole way through and, if you've every played a game of D&D, you know the original is just a bunch of friends making jokes anyway, right?

As for never playing D&D because of an aversion to numbers. I think it's kinda sad to hear anyone say that, really. Not sad like "HA! HA! You can't do math." but sad like "Where are your friends?". For years I played the game just rolling dice and having people tell me what they meant. I still had a great time messing around with my friends and now I run my own games. I really feel like I've earned the title "Dungeon Master". LoL, not that it's really much to brag about, tho.

P.S.
I watched the D&D cartoon when I was a kid as well. Did anyone else ever notice that the character classes were totally off the wall? I remember being, like, 9 and going "Hey! There's no acrobat in D&D and what the heck is a cavalier?" :-P

Y'know, Bob, D&D isn't THAT math-intensive.
I play it, and I frickin' hate math too.
You should really give it another try. It's more intimidating than difficult.

I too, like you, am crap at doing maths.
I appreciate their utility, but that's as far as it goes for me.

I always found it boring, pointless (in school anyway, I didn't mind using calculations in Chemistry as stuff tended to be way cooler in chemistry) and I just generally abhor the presence of maths anywhere near me when I'm trying to have fun.

There, that's out of the way. Bear in mind, that I think anyone who enjoys mathematics and can work things out in their to be highly up in my esteem. I'm just built for words.

Well, and visuals. Hence my love of movies.

I actually remember that cartoon! It was so awesome! (I was 6 years old, leave me alone! lol)

I was a small child in the early 90s, and in my country there seemed an unwillingness to let go of the 80s culture until around 94, or at least in my family :P

Loved the review, and I loved Benders' Game.

Here's an idea... Set the movie in the forgotten realms setting and call it Dungeons and Dragons: Baldur's Gate.

Cross Genre Appeal Five!!!

I have to agree with the guy above. Using Salvatore's novels would be an excellent place to start in a D&D movie. I realize the character is now a huge cliche (much like Lord of The Rings itself) but there's a honestly a reason the character is a cliche now.

And for all you nerds out there who started D&D with 3rd and 4th editions, you have no idea how easy the game is to understand compared to its earlier incarnations.

One word. Thac0.

Eldan:
Anyway: what does D&D have to do with Maths? No idea of 4th ed changed that (I doubt it) but it's not really anything more than first grade addition and subtraction.

You would be surprised how long it can take the non-mathematically inclined to add up the numbers on just three dice. I was advanced in math (because Americans only have one math!) and I sat there staring at it with everyone else before someone else said "Oh yeah. Eleven."

As for the D&D movies, we have no need for such a thing. If you want to experience Dungeons & Dragons, you will play the game. I know that crossing media is all the rage, but how many video games based on movies suck? So why should the movies based on games not suck? It's just not as clean a translation as books or television, and even those don't always work.

But, if you really want to know what it's like to play Dungeons & Dragons, go to any fanfic site and read the lowest rated stuff for any fantasy franchise. Lord of the Rings, for instance. That's what D&D is like.

If you are looking for a good Dungeons and dragons movie I would suggest. "The Gamers" and the sequel which I believe is called "The Gamers: Dorkness Rising". I am a current DnD player and loved both of those movies.

Jaranja:

flaming_squirrel:
Wait, vin diesel likes D&D?

I'm not sure what to say, my mind has imploded.

He was also a WoW player.

you just ruined it....

black orchid1:

Jaranja:

flaming_squirrel:
Wait, vin diesel likes D&D?

I'm not sure what to say, my mind has imploded.

He was also a WoW player.

you just ruined it....

What?

If you think that's sad, imagine how the guys over at Game's Workshop must feel.

There are two good D&D movies out, by the way, though they go the direction of spoof comedy; namely, "The Gamers" and "The Gamers: Dorkness Rising", both by Dead Gentlemen Productions.

Several animes also portray the fantasy milieu well, and the rumor is that the original "Record of Lodoss War" was based on the creator's own home D&D campaign.

Honestly, though, I don't believe it is possible to make an honest-to-goodness "Dungeons & Dragons: The Movie". The game is much too open-ended for there to be a coherent, resolved-in-ninety-minutes story to be told. Many of the greatest stories D&D gamers have are not of epic story arcs, but rather of individual battles or other high points. I could tell you dozens of stories of my various characters' hijinks, like the time my wizard telefragged a piscoloth, and many of them would make a great short, but none would make a good feature film.

There are certainly D&D novels which could be adapted to a movie, but then it isn't a D&D movie, but rather a Driz'zt movie, or an Elminster movie, or Mordenkainen's Movie Madness.

Yeah the scifi channel movie was actually a much better translation of DnD then the original movie. The acting on the other hand was not so great.

Bob, just to let you know, in an effort to widen their market WoTC has lowered the mastery requirement dramatically with the last two editions of the game. Fewer "moving parts" and a better design structure allow for more Role playing and less Roll playing, keeping the focus on group storytelling with all your friends, even those not so good at math. It's a cheap hobby to get into, costing about as much as a video game and you don't have to buy anything else ever (though most, like myself get addicted to the peripherals like minis or expansion books). Maybe it's a good time to give it a shot.

funny thing about that, see when i was a kid i was told, not by my parance, but by people in my church that D&D was evil. so for most of my life i staid away from it. and the real funny thing is even when i stoped going to church i staid away, it wasn't until, beleave it or not, i started going back to church that i looked into the game. see we had a paster tell us that it a bad idea to just go with what ever people tell u about something. as Christians we need to educate our self about thing that are around us. just i look at D&D and compared it to acult and witchcraft, and u know what. the way spell work in D&D is nothing like how they work in ether case. I'm a youth paster and i not only play D&D but i'm getting ready to run a game here in a few mouths. the only dager is in the person playing becomes obesed and really that's bad with just about any thing. so yeah, i just am sad i missed out on alot of fun becouse of fear. so for those Christians and non-Christians out there i have this to say, educate ur self before u start up some sort of witch-trile.
oh and Bob if u want to get into D&D now is a good time, the new 4th ed doesn't have as much math as other edditions. so just saying.

Ghengis John:
If you think that's sad, imagine how the guys over at Game's Workshop must feel.

though there is a Ultra Marines movie that is supost to be comeing out soon,......i hope

Wasara:
Dear Bob,

Chronicles of Riddick was a fine movie and certainly deserving of a sequel.

Any rebuttal to this can be systematically shot down with three words: The. Last. Airbender.

wait how is that a deffence of a Riddick sequel, don't get me wrong i love the Riddick movies but i would like to know how the exsistace of the Last Airbender Movie is an agrument for anthere Riddick movie.

They can't make a decent DnD movie for the same reason they can't make decent plots for Warhammer books/games. The books or films can't really change anything, at the end of the day it all has to go back to the way it was ready for the next adventure.

"B.A.D.D."? You have got to be kidding me!

blue_guy:
They can't make a decent DnD movie for the same reason they can't make decent plots for Warhammer books/games. The books or films can't really change anything, at the end of the day it all has to go back to the way it was ready for the next adventure.

To be fair, if the developers do move things alone people start yelling that the metaplot is screwing over the game. It really is a no-win sittuation.

Never watched a Movie Bob review before this one. Now I regret my apathy. This review was excellent.

I think I'll have to watch more of these.

D&D films hurt brains.......brains...mmmm *shuffle shuffle*

Krull was awesome tho....

I actually liked M&M. I say that as a die hard fan of rpgs and an independent game designer.

Tom Hank's character is troubled from the get go and latches on to the game early on. It is clear that even among his gaming buddies he is the one that is taking it too far and his gaming pals catch on. In the end they have to go hunting for him and are saddened to see their friend go that far down the spiral.

It isn't like he joined a cult of game obsessed devil worshipers.

the film makers might have been trying to make an Anti gaming movie. but they failed IMHO. Even the much worse "Honor thy Mother" which featured a murder, that at first seemed to be because of gaming, had to admit that it was not a game that made these people kill just a motivation to kill that took on aspects of the game they played.

thats all.

SomeBritishDude:
Bender's Game; the best Futurama movie? Are you high?

Bender's Game was awful. I aside from a couple of decent jokes near the beginning it's an apsolute shambles. The premise was pretty interesting (i.e. What if Futurama was a parody of classic fantasy rather than classic sci-fi?) but in the end the whole thing ended up being lame Lord of the Rings parody.

If you want to buy decent Futurama movie The Beast with a Billion Backs and The Wild Green Yonder are the best bets (but honestly they don't really compare to the episodes, Futurama is just not designed for the movie format) but seriously, not Bender's Game.

I couldn't agree with this statement more although I would recommend Bender's Big Score over The Beast with a Billion Backs.

I think the problem with a Dungeons & Dragons movie adaptation is that the game doesn't have a set-in-stone backstory or characters. Everyone makes their own unique person.

On the other hand, the world of Warcraft ( yes, the first word is uncapitalized :P ) has loads of history, events and plenty of characters. I wouldn't be too surprised that people find the latter better film material.

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