The Collectable Doodad Commandments

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aldowyn:
I've never been much of a collectible person.

For proof, I offer my latest game: Assassin's Creed II. I only got 35 out of 100 feathers... got everything else, though. (Not chests, those don't count.)

Otherwise, Enslaved looks like a cool game, worth a rent for sure!

Oh the game is certainly rent-worthy. Hell I bought it based on the strenght of the demo and I'm not dissapointed. Unless you're all OCD or a gameplay purist you'll enjoy it.

though shall not have to collect every single doodad to advance to the next level?

and yes those that just happen to be precariously placed on top of a pit of acid with acid scorpians circling it and being so far away that you have to have freaking binoculars on your person to see it.

or where it is underneath the lava pit and the only way to access it is by finding a switch half way through the level that tells you "this switch just did something" and you have to know to backtrack all the way to the lava pit to find the lava drained.

the lava one happens more then you would think.

Grey Carter:
your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

Hehe, I have to say this; the comic is your best I've read so far, but this is probably the funniest thing I've seen you write. :)

OT: I love me some collectables, but damned if I can think of something else to add to that list. That Monkey Island bundle looks mighty tempting though...

"Thou shalt not make players recollect doodads each time you return to a level, la Banjo Kazooie"?

That one doesn't actually happen very often though, so I don't think it's all that relevant.

CitySquirrel:
God, yes to number 4. I mean, sweet lord...whenever there is a fork in a path I ANGST over which one is the "move the game forward" path and which one is the "only chance to get it" path. So much hate.

The feeling is Shared.....Especially in KINGDOM HEARTS!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAGH What do you mean I can't GO back!?!? I missed a Treasure Chest!!

Grey Carter:

It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

Hahaha. Nope. Nice try. Been to art school, no matter how you try, your art means more to you than money. Enjoy your Egyptian river, I will imagine the cool side of my pillow to be your dead, broken, artist's heart.

Gratz, by the by, for trying to bypass the facts of the argument. Fact is, there isn't any need to traipse around grabbing every bit of energon or fairydust, or whatever the hell it was in the game. It was tossed around like used tissues on a /b/tard's floor, with plenty enough for each of the actual useful upgrades.

What Enslaved did have in limited, valuable supply, was a decent story and an attempt at character growth. Which I've yet to find in the fanboys' precious Firefly, or any of the Final Fantasy games.

And as for the mad ducats you're no doubt making from the blockbuster success of your groundbreakingly original webcomic, I'm happy to fork over the five cents my pageview nets you, in order to watch your upper lip quiver as you hold back the tears.

moshineko:

Grey Carter:

It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

Hahaha. Nope. Nice try. Been to art school, no matter how you try, your art means more to you than money. Enjoy your Egyptian river, I will imagine the cool side of my pillow to be your dead, broken, artist's heart.

Gratz, by the by, for trying to bypass the facts of the argument. Fact is, there isn't any need to traipse around grabbing every bit of energon or fairydust, or whatever the hell it was in the game. It was tossed around like used tissues on a /b/tard's floor, with plenty enough for each of the actual useful upgrades.

What Enslaved did have in limited, valuable supply, was a decent story and an attempt at character growth. Which I've yet to find in the fanboys' precious Firefly, or any of the Final Fantasy games.

And as for the mad ducats you're no doubt making from the blockbuster success of your groundbreakingly original webcomic, I'm happy to fork over the five cents my pageview nets you, in order to watch your upper lip quiver as you hold back the tears.

So wait your from /b/? That explains the smell. I still don't get why your bitching about another guys art if you have your own art to make. Why don't you just spend your time doing that so you can get better at it. I mean really if you think that he needs to get better then why waste his time by making him read this long pointless comment?

moshineko:
Hahaha. Nope. Nice try. Been to art school, no matter how you try, your art means more to you than money. Enjoy your Egyptian river, I will imagine the cool side of my pillow to be your dead, broken, artist's heart.

Gratz, by the by, for trying to bypass the facts of the argument. Fact is, there isn't any need to traipse around grabbing every bit of energon or fairydust, or whatever the hell it was in the game. It was tossed around like used tissues on a /b/tard's floor, with plenty enough for each of the actual useful upgrades.

What Enslaved did have in limited, valuable supply, was a decent story and an attempt at character growth. Which I've yet to find in the fanboys' precious Firefly, or any of the Final Fantasy games.

And as for the mad ducats you're no doubt making from the blockbuster success of your groundbreakingly original webcomic, I'm happy to fork over the five cents my pageview nets you, in order to watch your upper lip quiver as you hold back the tears.

image

Sigh. No, I left art school at got a real job. Now I make $25-30/hr for talking to people, don't think about my job when I get home, and enjoy plenty of time at home with my lovely wife and doggies.

I'm bitching about the subject matter, the art I'll leave for another day. "Female sideburns" would be the majority of that critique. But, hell, personal choice and all, "I may not agree... but I will fight to the death to defend it" and all that.

Thanks, though for the ego-boost. I had no idea my personal charisma and mind powers were so immense that I can make people read things I write. If only I could use this awesome skill to make people give me their credit card numbers.

And say what you like about /b/, they can take a little prodding without have to stop and un-knot their panties every five minutes. Make sure to use some baby oil down there so you don't chafe up.

I dunno about the getting shot in the face thing... just makes it more of a challenge.

This: has to be the hardest-to-get trinket in any game...

moshineko:
Sigh. No, I left art school at got a real job. Now I make $25-30/hr for talking to people, don't think about my job when I get home, and enjoy plenty of time at home with my lovely wife and doggies.

I'm bitching about the subject matter, the art I'll leave for another day. "Female sideburns" would be the majority of that critique. But, hell, personal choice and all, "I may not agree... but I will fight to the death to defend it" and all that.

Thanks, though for the ego-boost. I had no idea my personal charisma and mind powers were so immense that I can make people read things I write. If only I could use this awesome skill to make people give me their credit card numbers.

And say what you like about /b/, they can take a little prodding without have to stop and un-knot their panties every five minutes. Make sure to use some baby oil down there so you don't chafe up.

I have to admit I never thought about using baby oil. Also good job with getting the job (no pun intended). Damn your good, I mean I literally read EVERYTHING you wrote in your comment. Sadly though I don't want to give you my credit card number. It has been fun reading your comments and I hope you get back to your doggies soon.

Rock is Dead.

AstorSapolsky:
Rock is Dead.

Yay! Someone else noticed!
So you guys must be Manson fans, huh? Sweet.

Grey Carter:

moshineko:

Grey Carter:

moshineko:
I look forward to you telling me how terrible New Vegas was because you missed a Nuka Cola and didn't collect all forty-thousand of them.

That's great! And I look forward to you telling me what I should make strips about.

We are going to have to work on that 'things you don't care about = things no one cares about' attitude though.

Awwwww. Punkins awtist gots his feelins huwt? Well, that's fine, mommy fanwank make it awwww better. Gosh, makes me miss art classes. If you put your work in a media that allows for instant feedback, endeavor to grow a thicker skin, and for christ's sake, don't feed the trolls. Gah.

It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

This made my day :D

Btw, this troll just gave you some material to make a comic about, hehe. Self ownage anyone?

EDIT: If youre not gonna use it, may I? :D

moshineko:
Sigh. No, I left art school at got a real job. Now I make $25-30/hr for talking to people

You make it sound like your job is pathetic, haha! It sounds like you're saying "i finally got a real job, i get paid for doing nothing!" If you wanna make your job sound awesome, you gotta say something like... "i make other people's life easier" or "help the less fortunate".

"real job" and "just talking to people" is kinda a contradiction, haha!

Only thing youre making it sound like is "i failed art school, i got a pathetic job and now i spend my time harrassing other successful artists." or are you just pissed "critical miss" won over your attempt at getting a comic on the escapist? :D

Grey Carter:
your page views = money for me.

Do you get paid by the number of actual views (i.e. the same person reading it multiple times), unique IP adresses or something else? If it's the former, does the comments page count as well?

moshineko:
And as for the mad ducats you're no doubt making from the blockbuster success of your groundbreakingly original webcomic, I'm happy to fork over the five cents my pageview nets you, in order to watch your upper lip quiver as you hold back the tears.

Somehow I doubt one bad troll is going to upset him.

Eponet:

Grey Carter:
your page views = money for me.

Do you get paid by the number of actual views (i.e. the same person reading it multiple times), unique IP adresses or something else? If it's the former, does the comments page count as well?

You know, I'm not sure on whether it tracks IPs. *stops mashing the refresh button*

That being said the comments page is not counted I think. In fact I recall one of the admins saying the forums are actually one of the few parts of the site they don't make a profit from. Mainly because so many people are using ad blockers.

God is in the TV... Rock! La,la,la,la, la la...
I love this comic's music references.

CitySquirrel:
God, yes to number 4. I mean, sweet lord...whenever there is a fork in a path I ANGST over which one is the "move the game forward" path and which one is the "only chance to get it" path. So much hate.

mmm, i spend so much time thinking about which path is which, i've been known to start down the doodad path decide it's the story path and backtrack to start down the REAL story path only to realize "this is a much longer path than i expected for my doodad... DAMNIT!"

Optimystic:

coldfrog:

I never have, and never will, use an FAQ. Once you do that, you're pretty much bound to eliminate any sense of exploration the game might have given you, and to me, that's a large portion of the fun, even if it means I miss the secret crap. I'll probably go back and re-do that level anyway.

You could just use it for that one fork in the road and then go back to playing without assistance.

Besides, if you feel that strongly about it, why does not knowing the way to go bother you? Shouldn't it be fun then?

I know why not knowing the way would bother me, when i reach a fork i try to decide which path leads to extra stuff and which leads to the rest of the story, then i take the path to the extra stuff. But if i take the path to the story i then have to backtrack and replay sections i've ALREADY explored, and exploration is only fun the first time, though that may be just the part of my brain that is VERY good at creating mental maps. I often remember most of the important details.

Sturmdolch:
This is a real game..?

The plot/theme still fits with most games that have collectibles, though.

...Yes? There's demos and it's out....

Edit: Holy Crap I messed that post up. Let's try this again...

timeadept:
mmm, i spend so much time thinking about which path is which, i've been known to start down the doodad path decide it's the story path and backtrack to start down the REAL story path only to realize "this is a much longer path than i expected for my doodad... DAMNIT!"

In my post I was going to write about doing the exact same thing but deleted it last minute. I know exactly what you mean... the agony of second guessing.

Grey Carter:

We are going to have to work on that 'things you don't care about = things no one cares about' attitude though.

On the interwebs?! Blasphemous!!!

Don't forget doodads that require copious backtracking. God damn is that ever annoying in games...

I refused to play this game simply because I knew the game would not let me kill the one who enslaves you. Hilarious stuff.

Grey Carter:

moshineko:

Grey Carter:

moshineko:
I look forward to you telling me how terrible New Vegas was because you missed a Nuka Cola and didn't collect all forty-thousand of them.

That's great! And I look forward to you telling me what I should make strips about.

We are going to have to work on that 'things you don't care about = things no one cares about' attitude though.

Awwwww. Punkins awtist gots his feelins huwt? Well, that's fine, mommy fanwank make it awwww better. Gosh, makes me miss art classes. If you put your work in a media that allows for instant feedback, endeavor to grow a thicker skin, and for christ's sake, don't feed the trolls. Gah.

It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

Collectible Doodad Commandment: Thou Shalt Not Make a Level A Constant Slide/Fall Downward With Hidden Passages Where It Is Almost Impossible To Get Certain Doodads Or Go Backwards To Get Them Because You Are Constantly Sliding/Falling Down And You Have To Restart The Whole Level To Try Again.

Psychonauts did this with Milla Vodello's brain level. You were rolling on a ball on a steep hill, which was part of a twisty path with hidden passages. Not only was it hard to actually collect doodads, but backtracking to try again was extremely difficult, if not impossible, because trying to roll your ball up the hill was very, very slow. This is not "pass a checkpoint on an identical path." This is "Miss a collectable by an inch and spend 5 minutes backtracking to the same damn ramp to try again or spend 7 minutes restarting the damn level." And there were so damn many collectables for you to get in her brain...

I played Enslaved and Uncharted 2 both recently, and had similar problems in each dealing with collectibles, though Uncharted 2 was kind enough not to point out that I'd missed one by making it too shiny to miss. Instead, it just always gave me this feeling that I'd missed something if I went too long without picking up something shiny on the ground. Biggest offender of number 4 however is Demon's Souls. FUCK YOU GARGOYLES! I WANT THAT DAMN ITEM BEHIND THE ALTAR! IT'S RIGHT THERE! WHY THE HELL CAN'T I PICK IT UP JUST BECAUSE I KILLED THE BOSS?!

Cleril:

...Yes? There's demos and it's out....

Yeah, but none of the comments had the name yet they still talked about playing it :3

Looks like it's called Enslaved... Never heard of it till now, but I have been living under a rock (made of WoW, midterms, WoW, and mountains of homework. And WoW.) for the last bit.

Remember gentlemen, if you want to enter the competition you need to PM an entry along with a picture.

SO far we have... one entry. Man, what's the world coming to when I can't give free shit away?

Delock:
Biggest offender of number 4 however is Demon's Souls. FUCK YOU GARGOYLES! I WANT THAT DAMN ITEM BEHIND THE ALTAR! IT'S RIGHT THERE! WHY THE HELL CAN'T I PICK IT UP JUST BECAUSE I KILLED THE BOSS?!

Uhm, you can still get that after you kill the boss. Apparently you just walk up slowly so that you activate the "pick up item" thing before you activate the gargoyles.

As for this comic, it should be required reading for all game developers. Stop being assholes with the doodads!

moshineko:

Hahaha. Nope. Nice try. Been to art school, no matter how you try, your art means more to you than money.

You know what happens when you assume right, it makes an ass out of you and me. But mostly you.

COMMANDMENT 4. Oh, how this pissed me off when it happened. The worst part was, there was a little bit of my brain trying to tell me that it was going to happen, and I just kept exploring in the one direction, didn't I? Just had to go that little bit further, didn't I?

Then BAM! Checkpoint and I can't go back and collect the shinies. Rrrr..

Otherwise not a bad game, although the fights are a bit repetitive, especially the Dog ones.

One of many reasons I tend not to play games with collectible doodads.

...or...you know...five of the reasons...

moshineko:
So glad to see that you ignored those red herrings of character development (a decent try at it, at least), platforming fun, and an interesting setting to focus on the real meat of the matter, POINTS! I look forward to you telling me how terrible New Vegas was because you missed a Nuka Cola and didn't collect all forty-thousand of them.

Welcome to the essence of gaming satire! This isn't a review, this is about stuff getting in the way of collecting doodads - with funny pictures! Don't worry. I'm sure lots of people besides you took this completely seriously.

Grey Carter:
It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

He took a joke the wrong way, I guess it's time to chew him out! He's not a troll dude. He's just a moron.

I discovered this comic thanks to the halloween promo, and it's great, Thanks! Also:

Grey Carter:

moshineko:

Grey Carter:

moshineko:
I look forward to you telling me how terrible New Vegas was because you missed a Nuka Cola and didn't collect all forty-thousand of them.

That's great! And I look forward to you telling me what I should make strips about.

We are going to have to work on that 'things you don't care about = things no one cares about' attitude though.

Awwwww. Punkins awtist gots his feelins huwt? Well, that's fine, mommy fanwank make it awwww better. Gosh, makes me miss art classes. If you put your work in a media that allows for instant feedback, endeavor to grow a thicker skin, and for christ's sake, don't feed the trolls. Gah.

It was a statememt of fact. The fact of the matter is, you're going to bitch about the next strip too. And the one after that. And the one after that. And I am looking forward to it, because your page views = money for me. I don't feed trolls. They feed me.

PWN

That bitch is soooooooo asking for it

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