Shamus Plays WoW #4: What Happens in Goldshire...

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Shamus Plays WoW #4: What Happens in Goldshire...

Goldshire. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

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this made my day :)

havent ever been to goldshire i'm thinking i should now

Apparently I never played on a large enough server. Goldshire was always dead when I went through it.

Fantastic work Shamus. This Lets Play has been your cleverest yet. Keep up it up.

Wait just a damned second here!

His name's Norman, he kills random people, seems nice, has mommy issues.

I'm calling it right now, Mother is just a skeleton kept at the family Inn.

I hope he keeps it up through cataclysm, mostly because I want to see all the cool stuff without actually playing the game.

Shamus, you must have landed in a ridiculously tame Goldshire. This isn't even a third as bad as it usually is.

I've been known to corpse-hop a new human character all the way to the dwarven starting area and follow their starter quests instead, just to stay the hell out of Goldshire.

For anyone with any sort of imagination, Goldshire is the ninth circle of Hell. Next to Judas. In Lucifer's mouth. Being chewed up for eternity.

If you think this is bad Shamus, go get a Galaxies account.

I love the ending. Made me crack a smile.

"You get to go into peril and possibly die! Congratulations on being a sucker!"

Gorram adventurers.

I'm really enjoying this series! Quite funny, and since i haven't played WoW before, i have no idea what will happen next.

Might as well ask: about that demon, is it some skill that a level 1 character can use, or a pet of some sort, or a summon? How does it work , anyhow?

Owlslayer:
I'm really enjoying this series! Quite funny, and since i haven't played WoW before, i have no idea what will happen next.

Might as well ask: about that demon, is it some skill that a level 1 character can use, or a pet of some sort, or a summon? How does it work , anyhow?

It's a summoned pet, one of many types available to Warlocks. In the beginning, only the imp is available (glass cannon damage dealer type), but as you progress through the game, you can summon the Voidwalker (a tank type) a succubus (magical support/dps, I think? It's been a while) and some other types. I'm pretty sure there's at least one demon that's exclusive to one of three talent trees, but I'm not sure.

link_to_future:
Apparently I never played on a large enough server. Goldshire was always dead when I went through it.

Fantastic work Shamus. This Lets Play has been your cleverest yet. Keep up it up.

It's a big hub for RP servers, apparently. On normal servers it's usually pretty empty unless there's a holiday event.

Brilliant.

Kudos for the Serenity reference when explaining the madness of the inhabitants of Goldshire...

Only 6 days until the shattering occurs on Tuesday.

You forgot to mention the parties on the Goldshire inn roof.

Also on other servers Goldshire is way worse than that..

Anyways, great as always ;P

I think these hit on one of the big reasons I eventually give up on MMOs in general. In WoW in particular, the game's mechanics alone were amusing enough for the first day or so of gameplay as my rogue was consistently getting new and exciting ways to introduce steel into poorly protected fleshy bits but eventually I found that every class settled into a routine pattern. I was told, of course, that the game was infinitely more interesting later on when I could go on raids as combat would suddenly become more varied and exciting but as an utter noob jumping in right after the Lich King expansion, that carrot was an awfully long way away. In the meantime I was treated to a largely single player experience.

In that time, I only saw other players when I ventured into town and even then it was only when I was in Ogrimar that I saw significant numbers of them. Of course, most of the denizens had already achieved the a status somewhere demi-god and beings so powerful they could sunder reality where they not careful when sneezing and as such their capricious activities were utterly lost on me. People would be trading in relative baubles and trinkets that were, alone, more powerful than everything I had ever acquired combined in forty levels of play. So, while they were other players in the technical sense, they had no impact on the game. Being an unsupported noob, even relatively noob friendly items and enchantments were so costly that I could not comfortably afford that incredible level 19 weapon or armor piece on the auction house until 20 (or more) levels later!

Thus I ventured the world alone. The combat, as I pointed out, ran out of entertainment value quickly enough. Worse still, as the game progressed I had less and less leeway in how I was going to approach a given battle and in many cases I was forced to take an incredibly tedious route to victory using abilities with long cool downs to make up for my lack of a group. While the story might be a draw for some, there wasn't really any reward in it. I was appointed a defender of this or a champion of that and I would embark on suicide missions for the sake of the Hoard, but once I was done nothing tangible would change. Sure, I'd get a few coins, some experience and an item that I was almost certainly going to convert to coins at the earliest opportunity but that is hardly a tangible change.

Still, I managed to soldier on. After about 5 months of play I had managed to finally claw my way to the same scrap of frozen earth that the bulk of the player base was busy cleansing of all life (or un-life). Still, the game remained largely a single player experience. Many who had not reached the apex were shockingly well equipped - I assume as a result of rolling new characters bankrolled by old veterans and few wanted to be in the presence of a Rogue built for a solo adventure ring career. I could hardly afford to respec on a whim, both in terms of skill distribution and gear. Where other players were equipped with items of peak possible power for their level, I was often making do with something I found many levels prior and thus, even when surrounded by comparably leveled players I was still playing a different game.

I had slogged through Azeroth long after the game mechanics became dull and boring for the promise of actually seeing people regularly in Outland. I had soldiered through that ruined hell-scape because I was tantalizingly close to being able to survive in the same geographic space as most of the player base. But when I finally got there, it became apparent that my long journey (more than 5 days to get to level 70 if I'm not mistaken) was not even close to the end I was promised months prior. The brutal level of grind only increased further and the narrative continued with the same urgency as before except now that I was at the vanguard of the stories battles it seemed even more absurd. Now I could watch a dozen heroes valiantly repel an attack before doing it myself. Now I wandered past a desperate offensive I would soon take part in. The story itself was compromised not only by the inherent fact that the game world could not change as a result of my action but by the fact that it couldn't change by the actions of others.

I might still have kept going, but the promise of playing with friends at the end game, the very thing that convinced me to start on the journey in the first place, evaporated soon after I reached that miserable pile of ice and blood. After more than six days of play, after turning the tide of many a hopeless battle (only to have it reset mere moments after I left), after slogging through 74 levels when no substantial new ability was given to me after level 30 I gave up.

Barrens chat didn't have any crazys. Just morons who would spam your chat box with Chuck Norris jokes for 10 minutes on end. Don't think I ever hit Goldshire when there were many people hanging around.

carnkhan4:
Brilliant.

Kudos for the Serenity reference when explaining the madness of the inhabitants of Goldshire...

Yeah. It's too bad Serenity ended with "No, sorry, they actually just got some government funny gas." instead.

BloodSquirrel:

carnkhan4:
Brilliant.

Kudos for the Serenity reference when explaining the madness of the inhabitants of Goldshire...

Yeah. It's too bad Serenity ended with "No, sorry, they actually just got some government funny gas." instead.

The original reference comes from an episode of Firefly if I remember correctly, and indeed in Serenity they changed it too funky gas government experimentation.

Hmmm if Shamus is playing on an RP server does that mean he admits he's crazy?

I felt my braincells dying when I read the player chat near the end but for some reason it has left me with a craving to hear more.
Also my only regret about this series is we will probably never see the hilarity that ensues when Norman gains the abillity to summon a succubus.

Hmmm, well I will say that goofing off in chat modes can be fun, I'm susprised if anyone here hasn't done it before (including you Shamus). That's what Goldshire is used for, is a glorified chat room where people go to be silly.

Generally speaking people want an audience for this kind of thing, and to see other people in the same mood. Goldshire sort of got the duty because it's the highest traffic of the newbie areas. Arcane spellcasters are popular, and if you don't want to be a gnome, humans are your only option are humans. What's more the Night Elf Newbie areas are lacking (or were) you get better stuff and easier quests in the human areas, as well as being close to the "Deadmines" which is pretty much the "starter dungeon" of WoW to practice grouping.

The Barrens has a similar role for The Horde because it's an area everyone travels though.

What's more, wierding out newbies once in a while can be fun, if you max your character you'll eventually see why I imagine. :)

Also I will point out that your missing the other part of the equasion. Along with the insanity and people duelling and such, you also find that a lot of high end people give away a lot of stuff to low level characters in this zone because that's where they congregate. Some guy who has changed professions and need to do low level stuff is liable to do things like buy low level green items for gold (so they can disenchant them for parts), pay newbies higher than vendor rate for low-level hides, give away bags, wands and shirts, and other things. Just as likely as you are to find some level 50+ dude screaming for you to duel them at level 5, your liable to find some dude who is going to randomly hand you a couple of gold or a large bag.

While it was years and years ago, I remember that the big goof off in Goldshire was a female gnome (who later re-rolled another character) claiming to be the Mayor of Goldshire to any and all in the zone... constantly. She even composed her own anthemn. With all the goofing off I got handed a 10 slot bag (a big deal as a newbie) and a few gold while just wandering around.

There is more than one side to the whole thing is my point, it's been a number of years (I wasn't in WoW from Launch, since I played EQ II for a while before dropping it to go there) but I have a hard time imagining that it's that differant.

Oh Goldshire, if ever, oh ever Hell did exist, you would be it.

link_to_future:
Apparently I never played on a large enough server. Goldshire was always dead when I went through it.

Fantastic work Shamus. This Lets Play has been your cleverest yet. Keep up it up.

Same. Maybe it's a US thing? Which side are you on?

ooo, please tell me that you're going to westfall next. on my server at least there were a few rogues who liked to harass the guards at sentinel hill until players started to show up. it'd be funny seeing how norman reacts to the constant deaths and reincarnations of the guards and other npcs there, along with the skirmishes that sometimes erupt between bored hord players and members of the alliance.

though i really don't know how common this actually is on other servers.

AngryMongoose:

link_to_future:
Apparently I never played on a large enough server. Goldshire was always dead when I went through it.

Fantastic work Shamus. This Lets Play has been your cleverest yet. Keep up it up.

Same. Maybe it's a US thing? Which side are you on?

Maybe, but you'd think that it would be more lively on US servers. But as they said above, larger RP servers would be where you would go for such subtle character dialog as "In the future, rape is a felony."

I mostly played Horde, but I rolled my fair share a Alliance characters.

considering i played wow close to launch and rerolled a year or so later to play again i dont ever remember goldshire being bad at all maybe i had local chat turned off tho i tend to do that in most mmos i play until i am good and ready to actually group to do something. did play on a non rp server and us server to boot tho.

funny read tho.

Goldshire is a mess. A whole can of crazy.
Shamus, this is excellent. I really enjoy reading this feature. The perspective is wonderful and unexpected. Plus, it's fun to watch you justify the thousands of things a PC does in their existence.

I'm really glad to see that you are continuing this story. it's really fun to read.

I thought I was the only one who noticed how much worse Goldshire was than barrens. Best thing is, the shattering wont split it in half like it will the barrens! The crazy will go on!

There's a reason that Goldshire is worse than the Barrens:

Barrens=One of the largest zones in vanilla.

Goldshire=Two buildings (An inn and a smith) on either side of the road.

Density/Intensity of Crazy=(Total Mass of Crazy)/(Volume in which Crazy is contained)

"You get to investigate the Fargodeep mine. I've got reports of Kobolds there. I'd like you to go and confirm this."

There is never any escape from the Kobolds. They're everywhere. Outlands (As far as I've seen) has none, bu t I wouldn't be surprised if they were or in Northrend either.

Mray3460:
There's a reason that Goldshire is worse than the Barrens:

Barrens=One of the largest zones in vanilla.

Goldshire=Two buildings (An inn and a smith) on either side of the road.

Density/Intensity of Crazy=(Total Mass of Crazy)/(Volume in which Crazy is contained)

That also means, though, that Goldshire is horrifically annoying for the 2 minutes you have to be in it, then you leave.

Barrens is fairly annoying for something like 15 levels. And you can't get away without turning off general chat.

On balance, I think Barrens is worse, but for the 2 mins you're in Goldshire, it's orders of magnitude worse.

Vyce:
"You get to investigate the Fargodeep mine. I've got reports of Kobolds there. I'd like you to go and confirm this."

There is never any escape from the Kobolds. They're everywhere. Outlands (As far as I've seen) has none, bu t I wouldn't be surprised if they were or in Northrend either.

I'm pretty sure both Outlands and Northrend have kobolds.

Goddamn kobolds.

Sweet baby titans, this is hilarious! I wish I could see the horde version.
As for this:

Moriarty70:
Wait just a damned second here!

His name's Norman, he kills random people, seems nice, has mommy issues.

I'm calling it right now, Mother is just a skeleton kept at the family Inn.

... yeah... Thank goodness there are no shower's found inside WoW.

Tell me we see Hogger before the end. And/or Van Cleef.

nondescript:
Sweet baby titans, this is hilarious! I wish I could see the horde version.
As for this:

Moriarty70:
Wait just a damned second here!

His name's Norman, he kills random people, seems nice, has mommy issues.

I'm calling it right now, Mother is just a skeleton kept at the family Inn.

... yeah... Thank goodness there are no shower's found inside WoW.

Tell me we see Hogger before the end. And/or Van Cleef.

Maybe no showers, but I'd stay out from under the waterfalls when he's in your zone.

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