Critical Miss: A Parable

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Lol Hilarious.

Well-played

disgusting!!

but so is resident-evil...
it is not meant to be the same way all the other "Resident Evil" games were.
it is meant to be the way the "mayority" of gamers want a game to be. even if it's out of genre, but it is the kind of game people want to play, and the "ammount" of games the producer want to sell.
shooter-games are WANTED , horror-games are NOT.
today not many people want to play an old RE game anymore. even with better graphics... not.
todays games are not about quallity anymore, it's mostly about quantity and selling-numbers = money.
they dont care if they produce a good game or not. as long as people buy it they get their money. and i think the latest part of RE was just called RE so that RE-fans and people who ever heared about RE would be curious = buy the game. to see if it is just as horror as all the others etc

order:
i'd like some lightly toasted shit with garbage in lobstersauce , and a glass of pee please. ^^

Haha, that was the shit. Now, I can say I had a good laugh today.

Sneaklemming:

QuadFish:
Anyway, since I'm never early enough in these comments, I'd like to take the opportunity to say that this is actually my favourite webcomic ever. Of all time. In the universe.

It beats penny arcade anyday.

Not a fan of P.A. I take it. If so that's ok, but your engaging in hyperbole none-the-less. Day-to-day Penny Arcade can be less stellar then other times but when you have a gem like this

http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2010/8/11/

then the it skews the average into the stratosphere.

This was a good comic today. It makes a strong argument for the origin of seemingly senseless internet bitching.

PURE FUCK'N WITTYNESS. Resident Evil 4 has taught us one thing. Its never too late to stop sucking... only briefly.

Hilarius metaphor.

bwhahahahaha

I kinda got the impression that RE4 was the game Capcom had been trying to make all along. Horror has always been a huge part of the series of course, but there's also always been plenty of action schlock to go around. Like the opening of Code Veronica, when Claire runs from a helicopter's gatling gun before blowing up a cadre of soldiers by shooting some barrels John Woo style; what kind of tone is this setting, again?

It's impressive, I guess, that the earlier games were able to glean suspense from purely mechanical elements like obtuse gameplay, difficult cameras, and laborious resource management. But for every time the Resident Evil formula worked and genuinely scared me there were dozens of times when it was just frustrating. When combat is difficult, not because the enemies are particularly fierce or because I don't have a powerful weapon, but because character movement is awkward and aiming is impossible--that's less frightening than irritating. I just don't get the argument that unresponsive controls = challenging/scary = a good thing.

Frantically reloading with Dr Salvador's chainsaw revving immediately behind me in RE4 was every bit as nerve-wracking as the best moments of the previous games, and it didn't have to sacrifice gameplay to do it.

So that's why people still go to mcDonalds

I hated RE4 because i bought the PC version. Big mistake.

RE4 was awesome.....except for the creepy gun vendor who folllowed you everywhere (why the hell couldn't I just rob him and take all his stuff??? Hmmm?). But yeah, I loved all previous Resident Evils DESPITE, not because of the controls.....

But yeah, I'm definitely going to use this little fable next chance I get!

But RE4 does have shit! It's just relegated to the story instead of being forced into gameplay!

Your parable is like a guy that eats sunflowers seeds every day inside a pigpen. Wait, let me start over.

Therumancer:
WHAT A SNEEP

To summarise, RE4 is a good game but not a Resident Evil game. Hence a more accurate end to this revolting analogy would be for our hero to order his customary shit-and-turkey sandwich and discover that not only is the shit missing but the sandwich is actually a BLT. That's great if you ordered a BLT, but he asked for turkey, dammit.

blalien:
Thanks, I could have lived without a comic about a man eating human excrement.

If I had posted this in a thread, I would have gotten probation.

But... this is a thread.

Sorry if I'm a bit thick, but I don't get the joke or what you are referencing.

Eric the Orange:

blalien:
Thanks, I could have lived without a comic about a man eating human excrement.

If I had posted this in a thread, I would have gotten probation.

But... this is a thread.

Sorry if I'm a bit thick, but I don't get the joke or what you are referencing.

I'm saying that if I were to, right now, post a picture of a guy eating crap, I would probably get probation. But it's okay when the comic does it while I'm eating.

That is a very disgusting analogy and yet it makes so much sense.

Zachary Amaranth:

QuadFish:
I can't say I've played enough RE to really know what you're getting at. Isn't RE4 meant to be like that sandwich that has some extra mayonnaise on it because the chef loves you?

On another note, seems it pays to be up at 2:00 some days :)

EDIT: That soda can seems VERY familiar...

Well, not really. Merely adding extra mayo would imply that the sandwich was sound to begin with. That's where the "shit" part of the "turkey and shit sandwich" comes into play. They took out what was considered to be fundamentally flawed, again the "shit" part, and it became a fundamentally sound sandwich, the "turkey sandwich."

RE fans got used to the flavour and complained that it was missing.

Don't worry, my 2:00 AM past self just wasn't very good at thinking over webcomics. I've got it now.

tyriless:

Sneaklemming:

QuadFish:
Anyway, since I'm never early enough in these comments, I'd like to take the opportunity to say that this is actually my favourite webcomic ever. Of all time. In the universe.

It beats penny arcade anyday.

Not a fan of P.A. I take it. If so that's ok, but your engaging in hyperbole none-the-less. Day-to-day Penny Arcade can be less stellar then other times but when you have a gem like this

http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2010/8/11/

then the it skews the average into the stratosphere.

This was a good comic today. It makes a strong argument for the origin of seemingly senseless internet bitching.

Same goes for Critical Miss, except so far I've never seen one I considered average or mediocre. There's always some line like "Buy a baconator, sheople!" that just makes every comic so good. Then of course the gems come along and it's spectacular to watch.

Sneaklemming:

QuadFish:
Anyway, since I'm never early enough in these comments, I'd like to take the opportunity to say that this is actually my favourite webcomic ever. Of all time. In the universe.

It beats penny arcade anyday.

I think this is relevant.
image

QuadFish:

Zachary Amaranth:

QuadFish:
I can't say I've played enough RE to really know what you're getting at. Isn't RE4 meant to be like that sandwich that has some extra mayonnaise on it because the chef loves you?

On another note, seems it pays to be up at 2:00 some days :)

EDIT: That soda can seems VERY familiar...

Well, not really. Merely adding extra mayo would imply that the sandwich was sound to begin with. That's where the "shit" part of the "turkey and shit sandwich" comes into play. They took out what was considered to be fundamentally flawed, again the "shit" part, and it became a fundamentally sound sandwich, the "turkey sandwich."

RE fans got used to the flavour and complained that it was missing.

Don't worry, my 2:00 AM past self just wasn't very good at thinking over webcomics. I've got it now.

It happens. Just making sure. ;)

QuadFish:

Sneaklemming:

QuadFish:
Anyway, since I'm never early enough in these comments, I'd like to take the opportunity to say that this is actually my favourite webcomic ever. Of all time. In the universe.

It beats penny arcade anyday.

I think this is relevant.
image

You know, I always hated that image. A comic like XKCD which is full of obscure smug-ass math jokes attacking PA for being inaccessable? Ironeh.

blalien:
Thanks, I could have lived without a comic about a man eating human excrement.

If I had posted this in a thread, I would have gotten probation.

Obviously you've never watched ZP. If you posted that level of offensiveness and profanity in a thread, you'd get a suspension. The Escapist isn't paying you to post these webcomics, so it's not really the same when they post a webcomic that makes a somewhat disgusting but true analogy and when you make a post about some guy eating shit. Kind of the same way The Escapist would frown upon you if you ever post a picture of a woman having a miscarriage like Yahtzee did.

OT: Nice parable!

I lost it when I read "Others, it has lots," and saw the accompanying visual aid. I feel rather immature for laughing so hard at that.

You know, i guess your kinda right.
The shitty camera angles are kinda why i didnt like RE4. And the new invintory system was just.... to big. It gave me to much control. And i think thats why i dont like it.

Grey Carter:

QuadFish:

Sneaklemming:

It beats penny arcade anyday.

I think this is relevant.
image

You know, I always hated that image. A comic like XKCD which is full of obscure smug-ass math jokes attacking PA for being inaccessable? Ironeh.

Quoted by Mr. Carter? Pure awesome.

I suppose it's a bit rich coming from them. That's probably why I stopped reading XKCD; too full of way-too-obscure jokes and also only-a-little-obscure jokes that don't actually make much sense like that diode one.

So, that sandwich...

Would it happen to be called the, "Jill Sandwich"?

Ba-dum-tis.

QuadFish:
I can't say I've played enough RE to really know what you're getting at. Isn't RE4 meant to be like that sandwich that has some extra mayonnaise on it because the chef loves you?

On another note, seems it pays to be up at 2:00 some days :)

EDIT: That soda can seems VERY familiar...

All Resident Evils before 4 had a very, very bad control scheme similar to how you move tanks(or they were rail shooters.) It turned a LOT of people off to the game. Those who stuck with the game despite it generally didn't like it. By contrast, Resident Evil 4's control scheme was excellent. On the other hand, RE 4 was really more of an action game than a horror title, which is why some people disliked it. On the other, other hand, saying that Resident Evil was ever a horror game is somewhat misleading- You had less ammo and faced desperation fairly often, but the writing, voice acting and such were all so horrible that it was hard to take it seriously.

RelexCryo:

QuadFish:
I can't say I've played enough RE to really know what you're getting at. Isn't RE4 meant to be like that sandwich that has some extra mayonnaise on it because the chef loves you?

On another note, seems it pays to be up at 2:00 some days :)

EDIT: That soda can seems VERY familiar...

All Resident Evils before 4 had a very, very bad control scheme similar to how you move tanks(or they were rail shooters.) It turned a LOT of people off to the game. Those who stuck with the game despite it generally didn't like it. By contrast, Resident Evil 4's control scheme was excellent. On the other hand, RE 4 was really more of an action game than a horror title, which is why some people disliked it. On the other, other hand, saying that Resident Evil was ever a horror game is somewhat misleading- You had less ammo and faced desperation fairly often, but the writing, voice acting and such were all so horrible that it was hard to take it seriously.

Well I thought I'd learned enough about RE before you posted that. Now I'm just confused... how many hands do you have?

Cool comic, I actually liked Resident Evil 4.

i'm not an expert on the resident evil series, in fact i pretty much don't really like them, but i can see why people would like them, and as far as i can tell four was the most playable one.

that being said, i am an expert on shitty humor, and this was very good shitty humor. i mostly liked the part where it made fun of people on the internet. this comic should spend more time making fun of the average person for it is we, who are ruining the video games we love

now i'm off to play mario multiverse 4, i hear there's a sonic cameo

Pwnt in the f*cking a**hole!1 O_O
..
I really hope this has happened to someone.

RE4 "inspired" Gears, spawned RE4: Days of Our Lives and it stopped that damned KH2 from being unanimous GoTY in Famitsu. Speaking of which.

The Real Sandman:
This. This visual metaphor of a person ingesting human fecal matter via a sandwich sums it up.

It really shocked at first me how much hate RE4 got from fans. "Oh never mind the the ridiculously improved controls, interface, puzzles, and pacing, THEY RUINED TEH STORY AND MAED IT IN2 A SHOOTER!"

"Ruined the story"? Yeah, the story was already ruined the by the time RE3 was released and before that it was cheesier than a Voltron episode draped in fondue. While not great or original, RE4's story was very enjoyable to me. On accounts that it had practically nothing to do with the original (bat shit insane) cannon and it went about things deliberately self aware. With the added bonuses of likable protagonists, some funny lines of dialog, and a coherent and easy to follow plot and you got yourself a very well executed story.

However, one thing I'll disagree with is the huge praise RE4 gets for its horror. Its pretty scary around the beginning, but once you find the shotgun and some grenades, then it becomes an extremely weird shooter. That didn't bother me (were still some parts that creeped the shit outa me), it was still fun as hell at least! But when people say "past RE game were scarier and more atmospheric", that's just not true. Yeah you can say how RE pioneered the horror genre, but all the games pretty much relied on jump out scares and surprise attacks as opposed to true psychological endurance as practiced by Silent Hill 2 and Condemned: Criminal Origins. Besides, a game/movie/book/whatever can be as atmospheric as possible, but if it has a completely retarded and convoluted story and characters you want to flog every time they open their mouths, then everything just falls apart because we can't connect with situation due to it's inconsistencies and lack of any logic.

This man was clearly not young enough the time of release of this game to be terrified by the regenerators.

Hahahaha. "And now he must complain about it on the internet". :D lol

The Real Sandman:
This. This visual metaphor of a person ingesting human fecal matter via a sandwich sums it up.

It really shocked at first me how much hate RE4 got from fans. "Oh never mind the the ridiculously improved controls, interface, puzzles, and pacing, THEY RUINED TEH STORY AND MAED IT IN2 A SHOOTER!"

"Ruined the story"? Yeah, the story was already ruined the by the time RE3 was released and before that it was cheesier than a Voltron episode draped in fondue. While not great or original, RE4's story was very enjoyable to me. On accounts that it had practically nothing to do with the original (bat shit insane) cannon and it went about things deliberately self aware. With the added bonuses of likable protagonists, some funny lines of dialog, and a coherent and easy to follow plot and you got yourself a very well executed story.

However, one thing I'll disagree with is the huge praise RE4 gets for its horror. Its pretty scary around the beginning, but once you find the shotgun and some grenades, then it becomes an extremely weird shooter. That didn't bother me (were still some parts that creeped the shit outa me), it was still fun as hell at least! But when people say "past RE game were scarier and more atmospheric", that's just not true. Yeah you can say how RE pioneered the horror genre, but all the games pretty much relied on jump out scares and surprise attacks as opposed to true psychological endurance as practiced by Silent Hill 2 and Condemned: Criminal Origins. Besides, a game/movie/book/whatever can be as atmospheric as possible, but if it has a completely retarded and convoluted story and characters you want to flog every time they open their mouths, then everything just falls apart because we can't connect with situation due to it's inconsistencies and lack of any logic.

Seems to sum it up pretty well.

I never found the older resident evil games to be scary. They relied on jump scares and stiff controls, though admittedly they did gave a sense of desperation at the best of times. But that's not scary, not real horror anyway. Thing is, RE4 just enhanced that facet of gameplay which it got right, and oftentimes (especially on hard) the game does get pretty friggin' tense. The siege at the house or the fight against regenerators being particular standouts.

The story in RE4 is hammy and overracted, but brilliantly so. The older games were plodding and had really, really stupid characters. 4 went about it's story with a hint of self awareness, taking itself less seriously in general, but most importantly by having some decent pacing. Like sandman said, by no means perfect, but at least enoyable.

So yeah, I can't think of anything the original games had going for them that something like Silent hill, Eternal darkness et al didn't do better in every respect.

RE4 at least stood out on its own, as the best of its kind.

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