Zero Punctuation: Two Worlds II

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Two Worlds II

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews the sequel to One Worlds One... err Two Worlds One... eh whatever.

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Ah. Cold beer, Mr. Croshaws latest ramblings. Life is good :)
Although my cravings for Two Worlds...2..(never even heard about the first one) isn`t reaching an all time high.

Well thats because we are hardcore yahtzee! We don't smile... we are seriously really super serious!

(Good review btw :P I feel your hatred for magic!)

I saw which game he was reviewing, and before I even clicked on the link, I thought, "Oh, this is going to be bloody."

I was actually somewhat surprised that he didn't brutally eviscerate every aspect of the game like he did with Mindjack, but maybe it's just soft compared to last week's, because he still didn't find much to recommend it.

............................a laptop?

seriously?

you play a demanding game on a laptop?

...........*shock*

Also go play Trine. The wizard seems to be a happy dude in that game

ZP essentially summarised the reasons why I don't play RPGs

Two worlds 2, while being vastly superior to it's predecessor is still a TERRIBLE GAME! The controls are beyond stupid, the story is pathetic and the animation is lazy!

The story changed sevral times, names change and the main villain is alive in this despite being killed in the end and your sister's name changes in the same game from Kyro(k-eye-rah) to Kyra(K-ee-rah) and the orc female is apparently not an orc at the start but an orc at the end

the controls on xbox:
X=map
Y=quests
D-pad down=Unsheath sword
LT=Sprint, and sneak, AND block

I'm not saying not to buy the game, but if you do, keep your receipt h

and what yahtzee said about the button press>action delay...that isnt your PC, mate, it's the game, it's like that on all platforms >.>andy

two play or not two play, that is the question.
And thankfully you have answered it Yahtzee

dex-dex:
Right off the bat, you should have been worried since it is a sequel to two worlds.
and I am with you why the hell did fantasy turn so angry and cynical!

It changed when Tolkien wrote the TLOR, it's just taken video games a while to catch-up.

funny as ever

Why did they make a sequel to a game a lot of people didn't like?

Also the Japanese body pillow call back in the credits cracked me up.

Nails continue to be hit on the head courtesy of Mr. Croshaw.

Last time I'd heard of Two Worlds, it was back when Graham from LRR donned Yahtzee's hat to take a swing at X-Blades. Naturally, I wasn't expecting good things from a sequel to a game described as "abysmal" but market penetration in the entertainment industry is all about sequels these days, right?

What's with Yahtzee talking about sweet things then ruining the image with something unappealing?

That magic system sounds interesting to me. I'll pick this up after the inevitable, and hopefully swift, price drop.

First of all, Yahtzee, dearest, there is the option of switching between three equipment presets (melee, ranged and magic) on the fly, meaning that you can not only switch from your bow to your sword&shield with a single button, you can have that same button switch your entire outfit. Sure, ridicule the game for its flaws, but don't ridicule it for your inability to read the manual or PAY ATTENTION DURING THE TUTORIAL (which explains the concept).

That being said, the game is poop. Terrible interface, sluggish controls, laughable "plot", atrocious voice acting, lack of remotely interesting characters (the one dude that seemed like he might be fun gets killed off in the first 15 minutes of the game), overly complicated magic system which also happens to be the least effective combat method and is also made needlessly annoying by the poor interface, the list goes on and on.

But don't bash on it for not letting you switch equipment, because it does.

I'm kind of surprised you didn't stick with the mage, even with that card changing mess.
I've found that when you can pick out of the three classes, the mage is almost always the way to go with Western RPG's (Dragon Age, Fable II, et al.)

There's just something about lighting people on various flavors of element that never really gets old, as opposed to a sword or bow class.

Srdjan Tanaskovic:
Also go play Trine. The wizard seems to be a happy dude in that game

Well that isn't exactly "these days" now is it? And he has reviewed it already ^^ http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/892-2-5D-Hoedown

Wow, that inventory system sounds terrible- didn't anyone playtest it?

And is it strange that the bit that turns me off fantasy games is the whole... fantasy part? Give me a good medieval Robin Hood game and I'd be in seventh heaven, but ohhh... you just had to put spells in it, didn't you... It's like post apocalyptic games feeling that they just have to have mutants for some arbitrary reason. Did Mad Max 2 need mutants to be the best post apocalypse film ever made? No it bloody well didn't!

As always a wonderful review. I only wish I could spot the quirks of western RPGS, but I don't play western RPGS, so that might have something to do with it.

2 Worlds 2? I can't say I expected that in the least.
Oh well. Anyway, what turned me off Fallout 3 (or one of) was that, after I'd done a hundred side quests that all sounded very urgent and relevant, I'd wander around Megaton for a bit, trying to pick up the next lead, only to remember that my object screen still had story quests on them. I never felt like I was ever in a story...
Mass Effect had a similar problem (though, not as bad), which I felt was toned down in ME2, but almost too much.

Woohoo, back to an older "I have everything" Yahtzee. I love it!

HankMan:
two play or not two play, that is the question.
And thankfully you have answered it Yahtzee

image

I'm actually surprised he did this game, i would of thought he would stay well clear lol.

Excellent video! XD

P.S "Getting on my plums" is my new phrase...

ah man I was hoping for Bulletstorm but ah well this has been fun
just sitting here, chilling with a Coke and burger and then ZP appears and...
crap I need to study =.= laterz

A return to form. Very entertaining, even if I knew the game was rubbish before I watched the vid. I particularly like the bastardization of the game name in this one.

Sylocat:
I saw which game he was reviewing, and before I even clicked on the link, I thought, "Oh, this is going to be bloody."

Surprise, surprise...

Ditto.

I keep hearing from people that it's better than the first one, that's hardly a rousing compliment.

I have an LP on TW2 going on right now. 6 episodes in if anyone's interested. I made a post in the Reviews forum but here's a direct link
http://www.youtube.com/user/TheWolfram23?feature=mhum

It's pretty decent so far, but nothing spectacular.

I have to say though... Yahtzee clearly should try sticking to console games if he can't figure out a few simple concepts. Like, the game allows you to have 3 outfit slots. So no you don't have to swap shield and sword, each with a hotkey. You just switch to the "melee" outfit.

And the story is explained pretty well in the first hour or so once you talk with the Prophet. Of course it does side track as you go from there, but it's an RPG that's pretty much the point. Do small quests to advance in big quest.

I played this at PAX and didn't hate it, but I only got a few minutes with it. I'm glad for this review, because bad AI drives me crazy.

When I was talking to the team, the first thing they said was "We've completely redesigned everything from the the ground up. We're not even the same company as the first game!" to which I said "Well, why did you bother to use the name? It was a terrible game." and the guy sighed and said "Everybody asks that."

Cracked me up.

I am guessing that the second world is 12 hours in.
I am glad he is at least very candid if a game is not finished.

I had no interest in this game and now I especially do not.
Thank you ZP for giving me a few laughs while informing my opinion of this game... or at least the potential of me buying it.

WTF, Yatzhee reads Cracked.com articles?
My world is shaking.

BTW:
It seems, that throwing fire and lightning is not as much fun as it seems like.
Oh, well, back to inFamous approach:

"TIme for a BBQ lads.
*ZAP* *ZAP* ZAPPITY-ZAP*
MUHAAHAHAHAHHAAH BOW BEFORE ME LOWLY PEASANTS, FOR I AM YOUR GOD"

duchaked:
ah man I was hoping for Bulletstorm but ah well this has been fun
just sitting here, chilling with a Coke and burger and then ZP appears and...
crap I need to study =.= laterz

This. I thought that at the very least he would review Bulletstorm for the whole flaming tits thing. Oh well. I too am in agreement that Two Worlds II is a clunky name.

You wanna know how many times I replayed the 4:26 mark? I lost count after a full 5 minutes of laughing my ass off. Priceless, Yahtzee me ol' mate. Although the magic system you described does sound rather unique. Still, saving my money for Skyrim. But, if I do get bored enough, I might give this a look-see.

HankMan:
two play or not two play, that is the question.
And thankfully you have answered it Yahtzee

dex-dex:
Right off the bat, you should have been worried since it is a sequel to two worlds.
and I am with you why the hell did fantasy turn so angry and cynical!

It changed when Tolkien wrote the TLOR, it's just taken video games a while to catch-up.

That's still no excuse for emo wizards!

OT: Yeah these kinds of role-playing games seem to be trying too hard. It feels like there's almost too much stuff in them.

Was kinda hoping it'd be Bulletstorm but oh well.

The Doodle-God style magic thing sounds interesting but doesn't Magicka (Magika?) do the exact same thing?

Calibanbutcher:
WTF, Yatzhee reads Cracked.com articles?
My world is shaking.

Where does he mention/reference Cracked?

Xsist:
Well thats because we are hardcore yahtzee! We don't smile... we are seriously really super serious!

(Good review btw :P I feel your hatred for magic!)

How anyone could be serious in a game where as quoted by Yahtzee "Enemies keep wondering why they spount wooden limbs out of nowhere" is beyond me

I'd laugh my ass off the whole time XD

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