Zero Punctuation: Killzone 3

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Giggled like a 17 year old girl in a male strip club. It's lovely to see Yahtzee in such good shape just in time for some good old DA2 bashing. Eh? Ehhh?

I don't mind R1 being used for firing in PS3 games because Sony put the worst "triggers" ever on the Dualshock 3. But I didn't have to worry about it anyway because I got used to the Move and now it's awesome. I've never had the red light reflected on the screen, at least not during gameplay. I also guess that's why they made all the menus and loading screens red.

Anyway, thanks for not hoping on board the troll bandwagon and saying that everyone is multiplayer is playing marksman infiltrator medic whatever class is up next on the troll of the day calendar like so many stupid forum goers do, while also complaining that the non-silenced M82 is overpowered which doesn't make sense because the only class that gets one is the infiltrator, which means they should never get shot by one because everyone is playing marksman infiltrator medic shut up already, trolls!
Yes, successful trolls are obviously successful seeing as I want to choke them all, and that means they win, but oh well. I'll just kill them online with my SMG as a tactician and then they can go whine about how everyone is a tactician with an OP SMG because that's what killed them last.

Huh? Oh right, review. Yeah, that bit at the start about Americans begging for help was a bit silly this time, because as has been stated many times, we didn't make this game. Oh well. We've done enough of them for the joke to still be funny. I also liked the little censor bar at the sausage slicer machine that read "Could be wurst".

Also I'm surprised there weren't any comments about the stupid stealth section, where you go and hide in a dark cave to wait to ambush some enemies, which would be normal except that the ISA all have stupid blue lights on their uniforms. So you have a giant "HERE I AM" lit sign on you. It would be fine if your attempt at stealth failed because of them, but then the Helghast will look right into that cave at you, with your big blue lights turned on full blast, and not see you. The fuck? That whole part made no sense.

I don't own a PS3 but i have played killzone 2 and i thought the controlliers were weird in that too, i spose its to make it stand out from certain other rivals that we wont mention here but it does make all the gunfights tie your thumbs and fingers in knots.
Also 100% agree that the cover system is truly pointless in these games.


LOL, that actually does hurt. :)

I played this game co-op with a friend over the weekend. While I'm SOOOOO glad that proper splitscreen co-op has made a return, why does the screen split have to be so awkward? Tons of the screen are just black, wy couldnt they extend the lenght of the viewpoint to take up more screen real estate? Silly.

Also, the cockney thing is so true. 1. It never made me feel like the Helghan were evil...just made me feel like we were fighting in a post apocalyptic east London and 2. Why isn't the main character cockney? That would actually be cool! And having a charasmatic sounding lead whould be a nice change of pace.

I'm gla Yahtzee mentioned the stupidity of the ISA too. Is it just me, or are the troop carier flying box thingys the worst designed piece of military hardware in fiction. I mean, what is benefitial about it?? Explain game, EXPLAIN!

The Real Sandman:
HOORAY! Another tiresome brown n' gray cover based FPS with Nazis!

Killzone 3 is actually quite a bit colorful once you get out of the 2nd and 3rd levels. The first (just a tutorial) will show you some colors, then you go to brown and gray town for levels 2 and 3, then for level 4 you go to a jungle and colors come back.

Pretty accurate tbh. I still liked KZ3 though, worth he money. They could have done a better job though, which is disappointing.

So, could anyone here please explain just how the Killzone controls differ from the norm? I've only ever watched gameplay videos on youtube. I've heard it handles differently, more sluggishly and with more realistic "weight". Could anyone elaborate on just what that means? It sounds interesting, but I can't quite imagine what it means for the gameplay.

Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

Halo is already horrible enough it can't get worse.

Mr. Yahtzee, I blame your dislike of Move Control on your ignorance/stupidity, as it works better than Dualshock AFTER you spend more than 10 Minutes with it.

I play online only with Move, and I'm still better than moster other players even in my first matches.

Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

Even thought they have nothing to do with each other?

Look forward to seeing it soon. Computer speakers don't seem to want to work at, well, work.

Wow this game looks shockingly shit, also my mate said it's only like 4 hours long. I despised killzone 2 so I won't be borrowing my mate's PS3 for this... maybe Infamous 2.

The only worthwhile thing I got from this video that wasn't obvious (no offence to yahtzee, it was a good episode I've just always hated killzone) is that that advert for the film "Faster" looks shit... no wait that was obvious. Never mind then.

In my humble opinion, this 'review' fits perfectly in the section of called "Did Not Do the Research."! :P

Have to say I had more issues with the 'stealth' section than anything else. Someone's already mentioned the glaringly bright blue lights all over the uniform but what about the "oh, if I crouch amongst 5 blades of Helgrass then I'm obviously invisible, even to Higs looking down at the grass from above, because for some reason standing in anything remotely organic seems to render enemies blind."

Poisoned Al:

Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

Same here, and I've always considered Halo to be a poor man's almost-any-half-descent-FPS-on-PC (I won't get into arguments here, becuase you won't change my position that anyone who says they prefer using a pad to play FPS games is ether a liar or a flipper handed retard that can't live without auto aim). So basically I consider Killzone to be a smelly hobo that pissing in a subway lift.

...or they could possibly prefer the comfort of a controller and laying down on a bed or couch?

By the way, I can play shooters on PC. I beat the original Halo and Half-Life and FEAR, all on the PC, all on normal difficulty. I just find myself preferring an Xbox 360 controller.

Just to be fair, though, I do find myself wishing for a mouse to aim with sometimes.

Yahtzee... Please learn your history and the overall standard for ALL Playstation consoles.

R1/L1 are for shooting, period. No self-respecting PS3 exclusive would ever map aiming/firing to R2/L2 and I for one wouldn't touch any game which did with a 50 foot pole.

If you want real triggers, go play an Xbox or Xbox 360 game, those flappy paddle things are a pathetic disgrace which doesn't even come close.

Until Sony can make a proper trigger, it's going to stay that way. However, then again, does it really need to? Why fix what isn't broken?

Any game that has R2/L2 for aiming is almost always a lazy port where the developers simply slapped Xbox 360 controls directly onto a PS3 controller.

R2/L2 is not the standard.

That said, if a minority of people want it, I don't see anything wrong with having a seperate option, as more customization options is always better.


As for the Killzone series itself, I personally found it to be an extremely generic pile of crap, but that's something else entirely.

Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

I don't think this is applicable when it cost more to make and more to buy than Halo.

The games actually don't seem that similar aside from the 1st person perspective and the fact that its in the future after space colonisation.

But still don't think I'd enjoy it. First problem is the idea that every planet is always united under a single regime. How long have we inhabited this world and how unified are we?
I guess that's a genre flaw though.

Next its villains all come from the school of logic which states "I do it because I'm evil". This just bores me to death.

And finally games all about shooting, shooting and even more shooting get dull after the first play through no matter what expensive add-ons it uses.

Also as a guy in England I can honestly say we would make terrible dictators, but excellent villains.
No two English people can agree on the condition of the weather, let alone how to rule the world.
But as we don't get guns to make it easy to let our frustration out, we get terribly good at being inventive.

Oh look, Killzone 3 tried to rip off Halo Reach with Jetpacks and space combat... and wasn't as good! Well wasn't that unexpected. (the sarcasms so thick I can taste it.

Silly Yahtzee, everyone knows R1 is the superior button.

Gotta admit Yahtzee, you hit the nail on the head. Someone has to be brutally honest, and Yahtzee is the best candidate.

i actually really enjoyed KZ3, and i prefer the more real weighty feel, theres a lot of fps that feel like you are controlling a floating camera but this feels more like controlling a person

also im english and i dont have a problem with all the helghast being all british, most people have to admit as a race theyre pretty fucking cool

I really don't know what he was going on about with the controls. The way the controls are set out is fine. I've played loads of games with that layout and never had a problem. Maybe gameplay is slightly different in Killzone? :/


Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

Even thought they have nothing to do with each other?

Yeah that's why the first Killzone was advertised as a "Halo Killer", and KZ3 ripped the fucking jetpacks and space combat right out of Halo: Reach (only not as good!). I don't even like to throw "ripoff" around a lot anymore but damn that's blatant.

Anyway I actually was going to come in here to castigate Yahtzee for his blatant Research Failure in not knowing Guerilla Games was based in The Netherlands but I'm glad several people beat me to it. Gives me hope that people aren't completely fan-blind to all of this.

...You do know this game was made by the Dutch, not by Americans, yeah?

This is true, although other than that I think you made a very valid point about how non-Americans are portrayed in games.

Welcome to four years ago, Yahtzee! The R1 button has been used for shooting since the first FPS on the PS3. Mainly because developers knew that using those fat, bulky triggers on a constant basis would piss people off. I seem to remember you mentioning that in your GTA4 review in regards to the driving.

As for the rooky mistakes: Guerrilla Games is a rooky studio. Sony basically forced the label of "blockbuster" onto Guerrilla, because they wanted a first party studio to develope a Halo-killer. But trying to get a Dutch studio to create a blockbuster is futile, because we simply don't have that mentality.

If someone in need isn't helped because you take offense to a video game, yeah I'd call that evil XP.



Yog Sothoth:
Just as I've always thought: Killzone is nothing more than a poor man's Halo.

Even thought they have nothing to do with each other?

Yeah that's why the first Killzone was advertised as a "Halo Killer", and KZ3 ripped the fucking jetpacks and space combat right out of Halo: Reach (only not as good!). I don't even like to throw "ripoff" around a lot anymore but damn that's blatant.

Anyway I actually was going to come in here to castigate Yahtzee for his blatant Research Failure in not knowing Guerilla Games was based in The Netherlands but I'm glad several people beat me to it. Gives me hope that people aren't completely fan-blind to all of this.

Actually Killzone had jetpacks before Halo, it was in a PSP version or something, although I agree the game really is trying be both Halo and COD, and seen as I dont really like either games so as far as I'm concerned this game can suck my balls.

I think Yahtzee messed up the developer on purpose to try and get people angry... kind worked.

I mean geez it'd be nice if you didn't get your facts wrong for the sake of a joke.

Uhhh, I am pissed! But I know that I can't really do anything about it. This is the way he reviews games, and it's fucking hilarious

...You do know this game was made by the Dutch, not by Americans, yeah?

Doesn't matter, everyone hates the brits- the americans are the only ones who are unnecessarily hateful towards us though

Is no one going to talk about the possibility that He changed the wrong letter? Maybe they were trying to be clever about a war between the british and the IRA. It would still only be a one letter change.

There are so many stoned and drunk US tourists in Amsterdam, it's easy to get mixed up... but yes, gorilla games I mean Guerrilla Games is a Dutch subsidiary of a Japanese company. But that shouldn't stop us from bashing the US & A.

I personally prefer the R1 button to shoot on the PS3-controller. Black Ops had it also on R1 on the PS3 IIRC, why no complaint there? Just Cause 2 had it on R2 as standard and it drove me nuts. But I guess since I disagree my opinion is wrong. Forget what I said: I actually prefer the left mousebutton to shoot in FPS. However, since Killzone will never appear on PC I guess I have to play it on the PS3 if I want to.

The cover mechanic is a bit weird in a FPS. I never understood why they put that in the way they did in Killzone 2 already. If I'd go in cover behind a concrete block, I would duck far enough for my head not being an open invitation for bullets. But that's just me.

So most criticism here doesn't matter much to me, since I liked the gameplay in Killzone 2 (firing with the evil R1). I'm also not offended by British accents.

What I dislike most about Killzone is the weak justification for the whole invasion. I didn't really see something Killzone 2 (or the wikipedia entry on the game series) that would clearly justify the invasion of the planet Helghan other than revenge. The only thing that makes them evil is the obvious Nazi-reference. If you want to keep them at bay it would be enough to have space lasers that shoot down their ships I assume. Why start a retaliation war that will cost the lives of millions of people? (because it's a video game and the writers couldn't come up with a better reason than "they look like nazis!", obviously)

I was also annoyed by my own squad. The most annoying NPC in Killzone 2 is Rico. A man-child who mistakes constant use of profanities with maturity. Like most ISA personnel in this game. Unlike the Helghast however, who are able to talk complete sentences without resorting to multiple use of four-letter words. Sunshine Rico runs around and kills so many Helghast that it can only be measured in metric tons. Yet he is displeased with the extend of his own genocide and want's to continually kill more of them.

Hmmm, I thought Yahtzee was a bit more in touch with science fiction and fantasy than that.

To be entirely honest, I think one of the reasons why The British tend to wind up in nazi-like roles, is because they revel in it. It has nothing to do with historical fact, but if you take a look at things like "Warhammer 40k" which is a hugely popular franchise, created by and run out of the UK, you pretty much have a game based around the idea of the oppressive regime of "space nazis" are the good guys. You even have heroes running around with names like "Davion Thule" in the video games, Thule being a referance to "The Brotherhood Of Thule" which was the occult organization Hitler apparently belonged to. It's full of little touches like that. However on the other hand it seems very few people sit down and make complaints about it.

I'll also be honest in saying that "Warhammer 40k" isn't the only British walk in the park with this paticular theme. "The Mutant Chronicles" was another franchise from down there that was never a huge success, but has managed to live on the fringes of nerd culture for a very long time now, it just keeps coming back to life in one form or another. The Brits/European faction in that one is again a big "Ruthless Facism is okay if it's justified by an extreme enough threat and a hostile enough enviroment".

Oh and let's not forget 2100AD and Judge Dredd, while set in the USA it's another UK creation, extremely enduring, and it's gone all over the world, and the authorities are hardly any nicer down in Europe. Again it's one of those things where "being a sadistic oppressive twat is okay if the enviroment is hostile enough".

Then we have "lesser" British works of comics, like "V For Vendetta" which while not as over the top as the movie, still featured a very oppressive (if far more benevolent than usual) future society as the backrdrop, without being entirely judgement of it (the name of the game here was how ambigious it all was). Then of course we have guys like "Warren Ellis" who is praised for his British characters, and almost all of them even as straightforward good guys are brutal and fairly sadistic, oftentimes knocking American "nonsense" like morality and the human treatment of the enemy when it comes to combat. I don't totally disagree with them in certain situations (as some might guess), but it's a notable trend.

So really, saying "OMG, where would you get this idea about the Brits forming an aggressive society of pseudo-nazis, it's so anti-thetical to who we are", is kind of silly when you can just point to piles of British fiction on the subject, a lot of which presents such attitudes in a fairly positive light overall when you consider the big picture.

I don't think Brits are actually a group of evil, totalitarian, jerkwads or anything in reality, I mean there is plenty of American fiction that can be seen the same way. An oppressive American goverment is actually a stock villain nowadays, far more so than using Brits (even if it's not uncommon) which is why I think this desician was made.

Honestly, I don't quite get the outcry, to me it seems like black people using a certain "N word" and then complaining profusely when anyone else does it. Except in this case, I don't think most brits object, and would probably wind up thinking the bad guys in "Killzone" are cool just for that reason. Of course I haven't really gauged overall European reactions. The worst I could think of as a resonable action would be saying that it's pretty derivitive with all the similar stuff.

Just something to consider.

If you really knew anything about British culture, you'd know it is extremely judgemental of facist regimes, due to having fought a long and bitter war against Nazi Germany, singlehandedly for the most part, losing hundreds of thousands of lives and living for 6 years in a state of rationing where basic supplies were in shortage.

George Orwell's 1984 is a much stronger statement about British attitudes towards oppression and tyranny than a line of tabletop roleplaying games. The British aren't as obsessed as much with becoming a facist state, they're more interested in what would have happened if they'd let the Nazis/USSR take over or become like that themselves so they can thank god they still live in a democracy.

A couple of years ago British National Party (a kind of pseudo facist/racist group) leader Nick Griffin was booed and ridiculed on Question Time which is supposed to be a serious question and answer session between various politicians/activists and the public. There was enormous controversy about him going on in the first place.

People aren't happy because after 6 years of suffering the worst conditions imaginable; little food, constant bombings, thinking German spies might be walking amongst you, worrying your husband/son/brother might die at any given moment, the knowledge that you're pretty much outgunned in terms of military force with no military help from any other nation outside the Commonwealth for a long period and hundreds of thousands of soldiers dying all around the world, damn right people are going to be annoyed when they cast British people as the very people who we gave so much to fight, while the good guys are a nation who came half-way through the war and barely felt these aspects beyond soldiers dying.

But then again I do hate Jews.

Ah, Killzone. As I said before, Guerrilla Games wouldn't know subtly if it hit them square in the face. If you need an example, just look at the title.

I enjoy Killzone 3 for what it is; a good, solid, mostly mindless shooter with huge set pieces and action all around. Guerrilla Games get the small details down well, but I do agree that it's the core aspect that sometimes need tuning in certain areas.

I've only played the single player demo, but KZ3 seems like an extremely pretty game with vapid gameplay and unbearable dialogue. If I'd never played a modern console military FPS in my life, I'd probably think it was amazing. Unfortunately...

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