Zero Punctuation: Nintendo 3DS

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Someone's butthurt

Butthurt? No. Just tired of Yahtzee forcing the same elitist viewpoint into every Nintendo related review and people not seeing how much of biased drunkard he really is. I will admit right now that Nintendo does make mistakes (The Virtual Boy, the GC Bongo Controller and E3'08. There I just gave you 3 examples in which they fucked up) but I do not watch Yahtzee to act basically like the Seth McFarland of game critics which is basically what he's acting like every time he's reviewed something from Nintendo.

It's meant to be taken with a grain of salt. I'm kind of a Nintendo fanboy but I can laugh about it because there's a core of truth in there. Don't take it too seriously. He's only trying to entertain us, he's not trying to be an uber witty bawler.

Even with that logic, the review is still stale because he's made these same kinds of jokes towards Nintendo at least 15 times now. There's only so many times you can fall back on a running gag (ex: The whole "Every Zelda is the same" bit which is basically a criticism most fanboys rely on) before it gets old. So no, even if I don't take it seriously, I am still not amused. I think Yahtzee's just jumped the shark, plain and simple.

Assassin Xaero:
Every time they have a success it is followed by a failure? Which was the last failure? I didn't think the Gamecube did that bad, especially with Metroid Prime.

Metroid: Other M.


Awwwwwwwww, yeahhhhhhhh.

On topic though, great vid and I totally agree. Nintendo has been tripping up since the end of the Gamecube's life cycle methinks.

*sigh* I think I'll stick with my DS for at least another year, before venturing into 3D land.

I was disappointing that this wasn't a portal 2 review, but at least now I know not to buy a 3ds.

This was the first time in a LONG LONG time that Yahtzee has made me bust up this hard.

I needed that. :D

Still kinda want the 3DS because I missed out on Zelda and really don't want to play it on an emulator. Also MGS 3 for the 3DS is a good enough reason for me.

no nausea yahtzee? ive heard some people say it made them sick.

anyway i was never really interested in the DS, or 3DS. just another gimmick really, not worth all that money.

EDIT: i see alot of people complaining this wasnt a portal 2 review, i say you give it a bad one just to piss everyone off.

(personally i loved it, but you know)

I'm honestly waiting till June,because most of the currently known heavy hitters IMO are coming out that month,like Devil Survivor Overclocked and Dead or Alive Dimensions...Oh wait,I think that one comes out in May

I laughed so much, just as i though zp was going down the drain along comes the good senor to put a smile on my face, brazo yahtzee

Yahtzee at his best - this was great. I am also a little concerned about the trends from Nintendo, Yahtzee has a point about the lack of profanity protection.

But again, great episode.

I didn't feel like reading all the pages, but I'm sure I could hazard a guess at most of the comments either being in total agreement with Yahtzee or people saying they don't agree with him. It's kinda sad, but anyways..

In regards to the 3DS, I said most of what Yahtzee himself said just the other day during an argument I had with some acquaintances of mine regarding both it and Nintendo's place in the industry.

I genuinely feel that Nintendo's starting to really worry me the last few years. I mean, it made some serious mistakes in the 90's, and by the time the GameCube had come out, I had really thought they'd learned their lesson. They'd been making some good games, and quality seemed on the rise... then we get the Wii and it's a mixed bag, and now the 3DS, and I personally feel it's the Virtual Boy all over again.. except for some reason now people are willing to accept it and not flame it to death.

I actually quite enjoyed the Virtual Boy, but I think a lot of people who played it and had real problems were either playing it too damn much or didn't really get how it worked and were getting headaches out of lack of common sense rather than the hardware itself. But either way, it bombed and Nintendo seemed more than willing to place the blame solely on poor Gunpei.. who would later leave the company, pass away (on accident?) and then Nintendo proceeded to rape his children into the ground.

As if the bastardization of the Metroid series wasn't bad enough, now Nintendo's taken the very concept that spelled doom for Gunpei's career there, and tried it again themselves.. and I can't say it's improved all that much.

Hmmm.... not mentioning Street Fighter? That's the only good 3ds game at the moment.

I actually bought the 3ds just for this game. Every other good game (Zelda, Mario, Mario Kart, Kid Icarus, Metroid, Professor Layton) is just a bonus.

Having not purchased the 3DS yet because of its lack luster launch titles.
They should have just waited till next year to release the thing...

Pretty good episode :3

Until the 3DS gets better games it's essentially just a gimmicky DS, I like to think it'll grab my interest as better games are released for it.

Since the 3DS was designed with japanese gamers in mind... Would it be too much to ask to access our contact list over the internet as if they were close by? That was my first thought when I heard of the early DS online capabilities...

Fitting that the 3DS has such an in-depth critique.

Hadnt heard much about the 3DS before this, might have to "look into it"

That absolutely made my day. No I'm not going to comment on Portal, I read the disclaimer at the end, oh wait, didn't I just comment on Portal. Seriously Yahtzee, that was incredible, I totally agree and I don't care if you gloat at me as I'm too busy pissing myself laughing.

"The 3DS has been rushed out faster than a dog making retching noises at a brand new carpet"
Hahahahaha YES! Where the hell do you come up with these metaphors...pure magic.

I'm not all that keen on 3DS which keeps your head stuck in one position, and any implementation of motion controls to go along with that would be just...tedious, to say the least. One of those who is just waiting for the whole 3D fad to die, and quickly, hopefully. Even though I have enjoyed the odd 3D film at the cinemas.

Toasty Virus:
It did seem like they rushed it out know


Other than Shadow Wars what good 3DS game has came out?

A grown man being happy about being with little kids?...
"If there isn't a law against this, CIVILIZATION HAS FAILED."

That. Nothing else needs to be said.

By the way, will we ever be graced by the presence of Senor Koquonfaes again?

Aww, you're just lonely aren't you, Yahtzee? Don't worry, I'll be sure to befriend Senor Koquonfaes as soon as I got my very own 3DS.

Nope, not a Nintendo drone, I'm not. I'm just someone who's at that age where nostalgia reigns and wanted to play the new "Kid Icarus" one more time before I die. And if something good comes along the way, waheey, yippie ka-ya muthafucka! And if not, well, there's always the exchange counter at the game shops. X3

I admit: The prospect of naming someone "Senor Koquonface" and giving him genetalia where his face should be and making him go into other people's games made my day.
Well played, Yahtzee. I can wait for the Portal 2 review, which is probably because I haven't played it yet, shame on me for being hopelessly addicted to Mortal Kombat (I WILL REACH YOU CHALLENGE 300, EVEN THOUGH YOUR REWARDS ARE PATHETIC)

NGP- A Sony DS that someone sat on and decided to sell.

So long as it doesn't have region locking it'll be my next handheld of choice I think, I don't care what company makes something all I care about is the greedy bastards who won't let me import games from Japan/America :p

Nooooo! How dare you make me wait for Portal 2, Yahtzee? You are as evil as Gabe Newel.

. . .

Okay, I'm actually not bothered at all, but I felt like saying it just to mock people who get up in arms about what and how Yahtzee chooses to review. Does that make me a troll?

please don't do portal 2 yet! just give it like 2 more weeks! i really like watching your videos, but i want to beat the game and form my own opinions before seeing yours. this is probably just making you want to review it more, but please wait! portal 1 was perfect for me and i would like to play the second with that same mentality.

Imagine portal on a ds.

What really annoys me is the fact that the internet browser and online shop aren't out yet. How could they launch without either of those!? Ah well, it won't be very long until they are out(Like a month), and Nintendo is going to giving out Excitebike 3D for free! Pretty awesome.

Nintendo has it pretty good...
They make ludicrous amounts of money off marketing mindless gimmicks to Joe Dumb-face, and still have enough pull on Yahtzee that all they have to do to upset him is stay on their cozy, profitable, effortless course. Munching snacks on their golden throne within the ivory palace of Idiotland as Yahtzee rants about the shit-piles they leave outside.

Best episode in months, great work and great points!

Oh dear I haven't laughed that much from a Yahtzee review in quite a while

I wonder if Microsoft decided to give (sell) Rare back to Nintendo, and if that would cause some creative explosion that propelled Nintendo to do something other than rehash with one hand while tantalizing the crowd with some "twist" using the other. The games sound like such a throw-back to the N64 that they're basically saying "Look, that was the best it ever got, so deal with it."

*sigh* sorry, the Gamecube has left me bitter. :P

If I look back on those good ol' N64 days, as nice as it seems, I know that taking the same games now would feel rather empty because it still isn't new. Same old Ocarina of Time, which was great, but again? Really? Okay, maybe with more squinting this time, but really?

Since I read that putting out content takes two weeks, it's no surprise Portal2 would come out two weeks after its release.

so I guess the guy actually has critiques for Portal 2 enough to make full content..

I personally think it's great.

I've been on that planet with you since the beginning, Mr. Crosshaw. Can I hog the armrest or something?

I knew Yahtzee lived in Australia,but I didn't realize he lived in my hometown of Brisbane.This makes Bris-Vegas 99% more cool now.If I'd known,I'd have begged him to join up with me for the 'Professor Portal' achievement.
So,Yahtzee,when ARE we going to get a Portal 2 review?

I wonder if Microsoft decided to give (sell) Rare back to Nintendo, and if that would cause some creative explosion that propelled Nintendo to do something other than rehash with one hand while tantalizing the crowd with some "twist" using the other. The games sound like such a throw-back to the N64 that they're basically saying "Look, that was the best it ever got, so deal with it."

You do know that Rare's most recent game is Kinect Sports, right?

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