Duke Nukem Forever Review

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I would have much preferred that the reviewer included something useful in his video supplement like examples of why, how and when the gameplay sucks, rather than the montage of all the toilet humour the reviewer found objectionable.

Seriously, I do not care how lazy, stupid and phoned-in the game being reviewed is, I don't think it is too much to ask for you to do the job that you presumably get paid to do. Showing an example of how the boss fights break down into an joyless mess would have been worth double, no triple the amount of examples of this game's humour.

ProtonGuy:
Gee skip you almost hurt my feelings there. I'm just sick of this site taking the game equivalents of B and C movies and making them out to be the anti-christ. Game are, in essence, toys that evolved over the years when it comes down to it there's a toy for everyone, and somewhere someone will enjoy it. I like Duke, I'm having fun with it, but unfortunately my opinion is in the minority because people would rather believe a star or a number than rent it and form their own opinion.

Where did you get that? A lot of the people on this topic are saying that they're confused by the rating when comparing it to the written review. I personally like to see both a rating and a review, or at least just a review. I find ratings without a review to have too much room left for interpretation. As for why people don't buy the games themselves, maybe they just don't want to risk spending money on a shoddy game.

Terrible review. DNF is classic Duke, besides the whole 2 weapons addition, that was kinda lame. This game has done what many games in the past could not, it actually made me laugh, and completely enjoy myself. Most games now feel like a chore to be played, and try to be serious and pretend to have a story, even when it doesn't(I'm looking at you Gears of War). Duke is one of those games where you turn off your brain and have good old 90's fun. Hell, add health packs and keycards, might as well have been a homage. I've noticed the only people to appreciate this game have been classic Duke fans, while everyone else has just been complaining how it isn't like Gears or Call of Duty.

blindthrall:

Petwins:
I think this will go on my long list of games I objectively acknowledge as terrible, but enjoy playing none the less

Oh, don't say that, I have huge list of games like that. Dungeon Siege 2, Alpha Protocol, Postal, Deus Ex 2...but not Far Cry 2, I don't care how much people bitch about that game, it was good.

Hey, I thought Far Cry 2 was pretty well designed. Some of the parts I found the most interesting are the healing (where you can jab pliers right into your skin without making any indication that it hurt) and the weapon degradation (yeah, I know some people hate that, but hey, I thought it looked neat the way it was done). Probably the only thing that I can think of that I would want to change are the enemies. Seriously, the only enemies in the game are militia with different kinds of guns. It would've been awesome if they included dangerous animals like lions in the grasslands, hippos and crocodiles in the rivers, etc. This all takes place in Africa so there shouldn't have been too many problems with that. It would've made the environment seem so much more hostile and unforgiving.

Now what I find weird is that everything in this game is what made DUke famous in the first place. I'm not talking about the gameplay, I heard it just copied what modern FPS' look like (MW3 is somehow going to get a 9 out of 10 for some reason). I'm talking about it's attitude. It's everything every Duke fan grew up on, the crude toilet humour, the naked ladies and the one liners. Now everyone hates it and thinks Duke should have grown up with the times. Why? So he could be more like Batman? I ain't touching this game, as I've never played a Duke game before in my life but I want to know why Duke fans are syaing Duke is childish when he's the same Duke from the older games.

PS. Why do reviews act like this game was going to revolutionize the whole FPS genre? Yes it was in development for 12 years, but do you know how much time was spent actually developing it? about maybe 2 years. Considering 3D relams spent most of those 12 years going bankrupt and getting sued. Oi vay

I haven't found it to be THAT bad so far. Okay I guess disappointment would make it hurt more, but also maybe I've been playing less than stellar games recently for the extra experience (summer doldrums?) so I'm just extra forgiving right now haha

*sigh* Another example of why I dislike Russ' reviews.

Two stars is quite frankly a little undeserved from what I'm played so far. Is it a great game? No. But terrible? I'd a given it 3 stars myself.

The only thing that really bugs me is the load times are a little long. Other than that, the rest is fine.

I hate to agree but yeah there is a lot of "poor taste" stuff in this game. Having played all the way to the strip club scene the generally retarded I.Q. of all the NPCs in the game are beginning to grate on me... if they had just spent a LITTLE time on writing decent dialoge that would have increased the value of the game play tremendously.

*Spoilers ahead... not that it matters really*
Also I hate the fact that I have to shoot girls in order to "save them" that really sucks. I mean I could understand a couple instances to prove the urgency of the situation. I know what they are trying to go for... the whole underground bit hearkens back to the "Aliens" movie. But I would have liked to have been able to save at least some of the girls... it would make me feel slightly better about blowing the others to pieces with my shotgun.

That was probably the part that got me the most. Also I agree with the whole "Ego bar" and 2 weapon thing really taking away from the game. Duke could have at least had the nostalgia game play with health packs and life like what we had in the 90s... there was something about that type of gameplay that seemed more visceral and fast paced. Also the 2 weapons thing sucks. I want my 7 weapons of destruction dammit! If you're going to kill the realism don't go with a lame "ego bar" give me the ability to cart around a ridiculous arsenal of guns!

While the shooting is pretty decent there is something "off" about it that I can't quite lay my fingers on. Probably the 2 gun thing but I can't be sure.

Other than that its pretty cool. some of the minigames are very interesting. Playing pool to boost my ego was one of the most frustrating things ever but it was rewarding when I finally did it (although I wish it had been a little more of a sizable increase)

I like the many references to movies too. Most of the people that play the game won't get them but pretty much everything Duke says is a reference to something. "Groovy" and "good... bad... I'm the guy with the gun" are some pretty funny references to "Army of Darkness" there is also a reference to Predator and a variety of other 80s and 90s movies in there as well as a few modern references too. Did anyone catch the spinning top from "inception"?

Anyway I'm about halfway through, while I don't know that this game will really have much replay value I'm enjoying overall. It's a mediocre to disappointing game to most but for those who played the first game it's falls in the "decent" category for it's few fun moments. You just gotta deal with a whole lot of really bad cheesy lines that fall flat most of the time... and if I hear one more Muther F@#$ker say "wow duke, you're so badass I wish I could be as cool as you" I'm going to vomit... so basically I got a lot of vomitting left to do... but in between bouts of regurgitation I'm expecting to have some fun here and there. ;)

I agree it's kind of annoying. There are some bad taste portions of the game and there are certainly things to gripe about but there's also a lot of fun little gems in there.

It's actually not that bad... The biggest annoyance for me is the ridiculously cheesy dialog that falls flat 60-70 percent of the time... but there are a few gems in there. Plus there is a lot of creative gameplay put in the game here and there which is classic duke.

The one Poor taste thing that I didn't like was the level that made me shoot naked girls... they were trying to capture the feeling of the movie "Aliens" but it just made me feel like a baby killer instead. I wish I could have at least saved some of the girls at least... it would have made me feel a little better about the times I was forced to take them out.

But so far the rest of the game is a decent balance between interesting interaction with environmental things. shooting, puzzle solving and platforming... just like the classic game.

Wait for the price to come down a little, buy it, play it, return it to gamestop for a little money back and move on to the next game.

samaugsch:
No he hasn't. The "review" he gave the game made it sound so good that by itself could've made plenty of people doubt whether it actually came out or not.

Must I put some sort of smiley at the end of every joke or light-hearted comment I make? The internet irritates me at times.

Russ Pitts doesn't exactly have any credibility though. I mean DNF isn't a great game, but it isn't a bad game either. I gave up on trusting the opinions of professional children (read game critics) a long time ago. After all, they are trying to make people believe the game was in continuous development for 13 years... Now that's (to quote Yahtzee) "pants-on-head retarded" :)

What I don't like is the way everyone says this is the worst game ever and then gives it 2 stars, or 4 out of 10, or something. Have some guts. If the game is as bad as you say it is (and it probably is, from everything I'm hearing) then give it a 1 star. I don't know why game reviewers are always afraid to give a bad game the bad rating it deserves.

Ioan Constantin:
It is like having someone on life support for 12 years, and one day, he just gets up and walks, and makes a good game, too. You know, just for the shizz and giggles...

It's like having someone on life support for 12 years and them waking up with brain damage.

Nimzabaat:
Russ Pitts doesn't exactly have any credibility though. I mean DNF isn't a great game, but it isn't a bad game either. I gave up on trusting the opinions of professional children (read game critics) a long time ago. After all, they are trying to make people believe the game was in continuous development for 13 years... Now that's (to quote Yahtzee) "pants-on-head retarded" :)

Why doesn't Russ Pitts have credibility, but you have no problem quoting Yahtzee. Do you think Yahtzee has more credibility than Russ Pitts? Not flaming, just curious.

He didn't exactly quote a game critique Yahtzee made, he just quoted a line he made (more or less) famous.

I found this review pretty weak, then again I never really found any review done by Russ Pits that good (or interesting).

I do have to say that the amount of angry fanboy ranting about this game on every single site that's done a review on it is pretty funny. People are trying to make it seem like "everyone hates this game because they're offended by it", while ignoring the fact that every single review has, as a central point, "it's just not a very good liner shooter with a lot of poor extras and ugly platforming wedged in."

Wow...a review that actually affected my decision to buy a game or not. Before this, I was actually willing to look at it and probably get the game just because of nostalgia and curiosity. Hell, I was even slightly intrigued at the prospect of a certain degree of mindless silliness and juvenile humor, it hadn't crossed the line in my mind from 'simple fun' to 'inanely stupid' But nope, not now...won't buy it, period. When you play a game where you can pick up crap from a toilet and chuck it at a wall, no.

Just no.

Well, I can't lie, I've enjoyed the game a whole lot. Each time I see a old monster revamped and all the interactivity, I end up forgiving the flaws. It's not an excuse for them and it's truly a game for the fans. I just sat back and enjoyed.

I already take escapist reviews with grain of salt but when it comes to Russ reviews its a dump truck full of salt. I don't know what people expected out of DNF but I know what I expected. I didn't expect it to be some awesome modern adaptation of Duke Nukem. I expected it to be back to roots comedy, god damn fun and enjoyable to play and you know what I was right. If you are a fan of the duke nukem franchise this was a tribute game and in my honest opinion was an awesome game. It brought me back to the old days, the old gameplay, the thinking gameplay. Not the press x to open bullshit, no you had puzzles, challenges to clear just like god ol times.

Get your head out of your ass Russ, there is many new games that come out that are far far worse than DNF. The game was long for a duke nukem title, it brought the memories and the fun back. To rate it so low is not only a disgrace to the fans but to the thousands of people that worked on the title throughout the long years it took to finally make it exist.

Those who are still on the fence, if your a duke nukem fan you are going to love this game. It was definatly worth my $50 and hats of to the Gearbox team for an awesome tribute.

Industry-wide agenda to distance itself from games like DNF to pursue the status of 'games as art'?

This review reads like a Mary Whitehouse rant, but Jim Sterling's is worse.

This game actually offends me. (I didn't think it possible, but there it is!)

It really looks like it was developed by a buncha 12-15 year olds! I expect this from someone's nerdy kid brother who eats paste, not from a company which actually expects to make money.

spot on the money, a bit of machoism is all well and good it just needs to have a better game to hang on .... which is exactly what I would say about the Duke Nukem univers

This is to the reviewers... please tell me... compare to Duke 3D, is this one better? compare to the old game? why/why not? (assume that it came out in 2004... what would be the review like?) just want to know... because this IS a cryo game after all...

Paradoxrifts:
I would have much preferred that the reviewer included something useful in his video supplement like examples of why, how and when the gameplay sucks, rather than the montage of all the toilet humour the reviewer found objectionable.

Seriously, I do not care how lazy, stupid and phoned-in the game being reviewed is, I don't think it is too much to ask for you to do the job that you presumably get paid to do. Showing an example of how the boss fights break down into an joyless mess would have been worth double, no triple the amount of examples of this game's humour.

He DID do the job he was paid to do. It just involves reading

u no what sfunny, diablo 3 took 12 years to develope and i expect more from it then DNF xD soo i wonder what happened..

i have a question

How come we had to put in that we were 18 and then the word 'Fuck' was Censored

strange

Maybe 2K were prophesying their own Doom (sic) when they chose the name. DNF in racing terms means "Did Not Finish", somewhat apropos given the circumstances 8/

Woodsey:
"Recommendation: If you are stuck on a deserted island with only this game to play, go fishing instead. Worth playing so that you may be able to say that you did, but otherwise imminently forgettable and not worth your time."

I'm not one to beef about scores too much, but what would a game have to do get a 1-star rating, I mean Jesus Christ xD

I think its reserved for the unbelievably buggy/unplayable titles. (since i think, they dont use 0 star ratings) but i might be wrong. Although it would make sense.

Anyway, anybody who didnt see this coming has only their selves to blame.

I'm not entirely sure what everyone was expecting from Duke Nukem Forever...It was never going to be a ground breaking experience of unimaginable excellence. It was just going to be Duke reworked for today. DNF is just a spiffy reworking of Duke3D. Honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. It's stupid, it's pointless, you shoot stuff. That's all duke nukem has ever been. Why would it change now?

Though yes. I will admit that no, this game doesn't deserve a 10, 9, or even an 8 going off a 10 point scale. (Though, maybe it does deserve a 7-8 because for some reason the community that actually pays attention to score feels 7-8 means average and 5 means bad. People are weird.) I am convinced that a lot of people reviewing were just completely expecting a different game. That's actually understandable. Expecting something and then playing something else can completely mess up any valid opinions you may have been able to form. That's happened to me quite a bit. Even happened to me on Fallout 3 [Though I did put it down for 3 days, came back, and liked it now that I had time to comprehend what I was actually going to be playing. This isn't quite applicable to all scenarios).

Anywho.
Point being. I had fun with the game. I admit to not beating it yet but I haven't come across anything that would be considered bad... The amount of jumping puzzles is slightly bothersome but I've yet to have any trouble completing them due to pure simplicity.

My only regret is that I realize I could have gotten it for free (someone would have used their code on our little staff steam account). Not that I don't enjoy the game (as I've said already. Yay for lots of parenthesis!) I'm just always willing to play things for free.

And now this:

To be honest at the on a deserted island this game would be good as a wank material XD
Back when just minor spoilers about the game were coming out I said that if there's regenerating health it's crap, and guess who was right XD

A successful run can take up to 10 minutes, during which time little fun is to be had and the player, rather than feeling like a bad-ass action hero, feels more like the pussified FPS characters of more modern (albeit realistic) games, in which a single random shot from an unseen enemy can end your day. This section of the game took me over an hour to successfully complete.

So he dislikes the game because the boss battle is hard?
Yes, I played through the Queen boss. It took me about 5-6 times and yes I got frustrated but it's hard. Big deal. Some bosses can be hard, that's the way things go. Once you know what to do it's pretty easy though.

I got murdered by the Cyber Demon in Doom 2 probably about 20 times before I beat it (when I first played). I didn't complain that it was shit, I just kept trying.

The only thing I don't really like is when bosses have cheap friggin attacks, like the black-haired chick in PoP Two Thrones

You can understand DNF level greatness when you realize the Concept Art for those levels was made by the ever amazing Feng Zhu.

So it is. Duke Nukem concept art by Feng Zhu here, done in 2003-4. Ha.
Worked on Star Wars III, Tron Revolution, Dead Space etc..

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