Zero Punctuation: Call of Juarez: The Cartel

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Jaime_Wolf:

Swifteye:

Jaime_Wolf:
The beginning was the same jokes. Again. Same criticisms. Again. Same fan-baiting. Again.

At least there was an actual review this time.

Well sir if you've gotten tired with how Yathzee tells jokes you can always watch the other stuff on the escapist cause this actual review your speaking of. That didn't happen he doesn't review games. Susan, steve, russ those people review the games here.

Well sir if you don't agree with my post you can always read other posts and stuff on the escapist.

The "If you don't like it, don't watch it and stop complaining." response is unimaginably asinine and pointless. By that same reasoning, you shouldn't have replied to my post - if you don't agree with me, you shouldn't voice your opinion, but should instead go read and respond to other posts you do agree with.

More on topic: I'm not tired of his sense of humour in general, I'm tired of the fact that he levels exactly the same criticisms against every other game and even uses the same jokes to do it much of the time. There's still the occaisional new comedic gem, but they seem to be further and further apart. If he spent more time joking about the game under review and less time reiterating the same complaints about modern shooters every goddamn time, the show would be much improved. And the fan-baiting is only funny when the fans are particularly unreasonable about something. If he made fun of the fact that people overlooked all of the flaws in a game like OoT that would be funny. Making fun of the fact that people like it at all isn't funny, it's just juvenille trolling. And it's such an incredibly transparent attempt at trolling that it isn't even good trolling.

I said what I said not for the usual reasons like to excuse the perspective disagreements but mostly because well. Stuff gets boring after awhile. Sure you enjoy this but sometimes when you pay witness to it regularly it becomes easier to get annoyed or bored of repetitive elements. You may wish for a bit more or ask for things that would improve it's quality but the reality usually is that such an opinion has no power on actually altering the product at hand. Especially when it comes to comedy you just kinda have to go with what you know I've rarely seen a comic switch up there styles or reinvigorate themselves with a different execution. The bulk of the humor output is mostly based on what your being given. And with games like this yahtzee may not have been given much to work with what with most games being something he's done so many reviews of or he doesn't like them for rather fundamental reasons and it's hard for him not to bring it up.

Because you are feeling a dissatisfaction that only comes from enjoying something for too long I suggested a bit of a sabbatical. Take a break from Zero Punctuation and invest in other things. Are you familiar with classic game room on youtube? The reviewer there is very much different from most other reviewers um anywhere really. He has his own quirks but he has about 2000 videos and updates daily so take a chance if you haven't tried it.

I bet after a month or three you'll come back to a bunch of zero punctuation reviews and you'll appreciate what he gives out even though it is more of the same.

Sorry, but there isn't enough hate in the video, and I know you Yahtzee, you can still do even better!

This game has to be the biggest peice of shit ever this year, I hope the developers are happy...:D

-_-

So last week Yahtzee was attacking people who defend classic FPS games, and this week he's defending classic FPS games? Jesus.

Holy shit, that was awesome. Best one in quite a while.

Let me start by saying this:

I live extremely close to Juarez, Mexico, which is one of the most dangerous cities in the world where you would find the Cartel running the place and blah blah. I also work at GameStop. So whenever someone would come in and look at our Call of Juarez: The Cartel promo poster, this was their response:

"OMGGGGGGGGG! A JUAREZ GAME! FFF--I'll reserve 20 copies! Just take my money!"

While the small majority would be offended because of *ahem* "A game that mocks the current situation of said city". Then mothers would look angrily at me as they hurried their children out of the store.

Anywho, I find it funny because the game is selling like pancakes over here. And I KNOW that we'll end up having like 50 used copies by the end of the month. No one knows how bad the game is! We've actually taken on the important task of warning people about how bad the game is before they buy the game.

So I actually agree with Yahtzee. This game plain SUCKS! Like most lame games, it could have been a good game but it never quite got there. Seriously, if you gotta choose a good FPS, choose Black Ops, at least (Not a big fan of CoD but it's still better, I must admit).

I seriously lost it during the "There is no middle finger big enough!" bit. Classic, Yahtzee! An absolute classic!

So, let me get this straight: America is no longer the sweaty fat teenage girl writing self-insert fanfiction about the hunky European boy down the street, but is now the fiercely masturbating twenty-something over the sweaty shirtless latino guy in the apartment window across the street, since now the FPS fiction is us picking fights with Mexico.

Dear America, what the hell? Sincerely, the rest of the world.

The funniest ZP in a while, I cried laughing at the middle finger joke.

Crucified, and justly so.

1) I had to rewind the video after 4:18 because I was laughing too hard. "THERE IS NO MIDDLE FINGER BIG ENOUGH" is probably now my favorite Yahtzee moment.

EDIT: Followed closely by "I don't see Alice: Madness Returns making mad returns. Neyh heh he..." I loves me some puns.

2) What, are they just erasing all the "FIRST" comments from the thread now? I find it hard to believe that the Internet is getting more mature, but stranger things have happened, I guess.

You've struck a chord with the middle finger thing. Er.. mixed metaphors never work. I forsee posters.Excellent review, best one for a while.

ScourgeOfHell:
He never liked Call of juarez ??

He liked the second one Bound in Blood.

I know the feeling of no one being online at one in the afternoon.

I would like to add my voice to the chorus of appreciation for the line:

"There is no middle finger big enough!"

I've been pretty depressed lately, but that line actually made me laugh. :)

Thank you, Yahtzee. Your review made me spray tea-flavored spit across my computer screen.

This was definitely one of the funnier ones.

is it just me or did Yahtzee and zero p hit 200 episodes a while ago?

He does bring up a good point when he mentions the lack of driving AI. There are so many games that do that and it ruins the whole idea of branching choices for gameplay. Especially when the AI cant keep anyone off you and you die despite your driving ability.

So many great points about how shoehorned CO-OP/multiplayer ruins games. Developers and Publishers need to take it off their damn checklist of features. It is really destroying gaming lately.

head desk tricycle:
So last week Yahtzee was attacking people who defend classic FPS games, and this week he's defending classic FPS games? Jesus.

When did that happen?

Yahtzee, you flamboyant bon vivant. You ARE being nostalgic. Being nostalgic don't mean be "blind all time". Sometimes there's reason behind the nostalgia.

Why do I get the feeling Yahtzee is stalling?
It seems like there are one or two titles he doesn't want to review yet because he either thinks "this might be really enjoyable" or, far more likely, because he thinks "this will be utter shit". Either way he can get passionate about it, so like a real gourmet he's saving the best bit for the last bite. :D

Don't worry, Yahtzee, Deus Ex 3 comes closer and closer and from the looks of it, it's gonna be a fun ride, if you don't get tired of the palette. But I'm sure you won't. Zero Punctuation uses the same colors after all. :P

looked lame anyway

From what I can tell, this game ss just one big mess, which is a real shame.

I thought the review was just, you know, a good yahtzee review. Then I saw the inserted picture of the Sergant Pepper's albbum. This review is now my favorite

This game sounds a lot like the Tom Clancy book Against All Enemies.

Only just thought of this: was this Yahtzee's 200th Zero Punctuation? It would be quite apt considering his 100th...

Oh, it gets worse. I'm honestly surprised this didn't make it into the episode (time restraints, I suppose) but this is the most racist, ignorant, disrespectful piece of shit AAA game that I've ever heard of.

http://penny-arcade.com/patv/episode/call-of-juarez-the-cartel

Achievements for killing black people. The laziest stereotypes ever made. BLATANT misinformation, horrific implications and an overall disgusting treatment of an ONGOING war that has KILLED 40,000 PEOPLE. Just...aarrgh.

Despite the fact I loved the Cartel (At least in co-op. I panned the single player), everything you said was 100% accurate.

deathjavu:
Oh, it gets worse. I'm honestly surprised this didn't make it into the episode (time restraints, I suppose) but this is the most racist, ignorant, disrespectful piece of shit AAA game that I've ever heard of.

http://penny-arcade.com/patv/episode/call-of-juarez-the-cartel

Achievements for killing black people. The laziest stereotypes ever made. BLATANT misinformation, horrific implications and an overall disgusting treatment of an ONGOING war that has KILLED 40,000 PEOPLE. Just...aarrgh.

EC's evisceration of this game is, if anything, far more brutal than anything Yahtzee comes out with, but I can't help feeling they were expecting too much of it going in. I guess I automatically expect shooters to trivialise any real world event they touch upon.

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