With This Plasma Rifle, I Thee Wed

I wasn't so sure on this with the first issue, but i'm actually liking this a fair bit now as I agree with what you say (and knowing people agree with me makes my day brighter).

The standard thing gets said so often by the geekier crowd I hang out with that it's actually kind of a chore to explain to them that standards do not exist. Being a person with their own wants, needs and feelings is standard enough for most people and talking about what you're interested in should never warn off people. If it does, you know you're talking to the wrong people and nothing is lost by them being warned off.

I think a few of the escapists love seekers could do with a read of that second page.

Do we have any pyrotechnicians and pilots here who can team up to write this:

Lara Crigger:
In high school, we divide ourselves by cliques - the jock, the nerd, the drama kid - but the reality is that human beings are far more complex and layered than one single label can capture. Individuals are a cacophony of interests and beliefs, often conflicting. That lady getting her mani/pedi may also be able to quote Minbari scripture; the girl devouring the latest Pretty Little Liars novel may also keep Zelazny and Gaiman on her nightstand.

In flaming letters across the sky? That'd be great.

Thanks in advance.

Hagi:
Do we have any pyrotechnicians and pilots here who can team up to write this:

Lara Crigger:
In high school, we divide ourselves by cliques - the jock, the nerd, the drama kid - but the reality is that human beings are far more complex and layered than one single label can capture. Individuals are a cacophony of interests and beliefs, often conflicting. That lady getting her mani/pedi may also be able to quote Minbari scripture; the girl devouring the latest Pretty Little Liars novel may also keep Zelazny and Gaiman on her nightstand.

In flaming letters across the sky? That'd be great.

Thanks in advance.

The most I can do is probably... I don't know... write this on the surface of the moon with my doomsday laser. Its a bloody pain to calibrate though so don't blame me when I accidentally destroy the Moon and chunks of moon rock splinter off and crush your car.

P.S.: Next time you're stuck at a bar, try asking the cute guy whether he thinks Han shot first. You may be pleasantly surprised - and if he doesn't know what you're talking about, he wasn't worth your time anyway.

To be perfectly fair and honest, the first girl who opens with a line like that one will instantly gain one devout worshipper.

And I'm betting I'm not the only one who feels that way.

I can relate to the sender of the second letter, except I don't keep to myself in public settings due to anxiety - I keep to myself because bars and clubs annoy the ever-loving fuck out of me.

That and given that I live in DC, one of the more "hipster" and "ghetto" cities in America (simultaneously, no less)... yeah.

And I don't have much better luck at anime and gaming conventions either. All the ones that seem worthwhile are already taken. :(

But maybe it's better this way, especially me being a member of the US military. I can focus better on advancing myself in life, or so I keep telling myself.

PH3NOmenon:

P.S.: Next time you're stuck at a bar, try asking the cute guy whether he thinks Han shot first. You may be pleasantly surprised - and if he doesn't know what you're talking about, he wasn't worth your time anyway.

To be perfectly fair and honest, the first girl who opens with a line like that one will instantly gain one devout worshipper.

And I'm betting I'm not the only one who feels that way.

That confused me a little I assume from

A couple of my friends and their girlfriends

and

I don't talk about what standard girls talk about, and I don't do what standard girls like to do.

that the writer was male, and from the was Lara responds at first it looked like my assumption was write, but....is the writer male or female?

And on another note, a girl that I never really payed much attention to originally (unless a girl can show me that there is something under that so called "hott" exterior then I don't even waste my time looking) mentioned Yeerks (from the Animorphs book series) and my head literally snapped around. So I guess my point is making random nerd references is a great way to attract attention

I noticed the gender shift too, artanis. Not that I usually get hung-up on gender identities fitting pigeonholes, but this week's column almost read like a particular exerpt from the Shadowrun core rulebook which boggles my mind:

Magical Lodges (pages 167 and 168)
In order to progress in her studies, a magician must have a collection of symbols, writings, tools, and other material that allows him to record her progress, gives him room to expand her knowledge, and assists him in her magical endeavors.

I'm all for gender-inclusivity (and NOT just male and female, at that), but there's something to be said for consistency as well. I mean, if the subject is gender-fluid, sure, I'll accept it there (maybe . . . although they're flip-flopping quite rapidly in such a context), but when talking about a person who identifies as one particular gender, it's just incongruent to switch to other gender pronouns while discussing them.

artanis_neravar:

PH3NOmenon:

P.S.: Next time you're stuck at a bar, try asking the cute guy whether he thinks Han shot first. You may be pleasantly surprised - and if he doesn't know what you're talking about, he wasn't worth your time anyway.

To be perfectly fair and honest, the first girl who opens with a line like that one will instantly gain one devout worshipper.

And I'm betting I'm not the only one who feels that way.

That confused me a little I assume from

A couple of my friends and their girlfriends

and

I don't talk about what standard girls talk about, and I don't do what standard girls like to do.

that the writer was male, and from the was Lara responds at first it looked like my assumption was write, but....is the writer male or female?

And on another note, a girl that I never really payed much attention to originally (unless a girl can show me that there is something under that so called "hott" exterior then I don't even waste my time looking) mentioned Yeerks (from the Animorphs book series) and my head literally snapped around. So I guess my point is making random nerd references is a great way to attract attention

Pretty sure No-one to Co-op is female, but I could be wrong, although Lara Crigger does use both male/female scenario's, I think that's where the confusion lies. The OP does state "how do normal girls act?".

Whatever sex No-one to Co-op is, I do wish them the best of luck, seems that trendy wine bars aren't for them, possibly getting to know the opposite sex through a hobby/hobby group would be easier for them. Since the ice is already broken.

might as well. insticts are a powerful thing. there isnt anything fundamentaly wrong with video games, and i honestly think thats the problem. Its colorful and, in a more clasic sense, which provingly meets up with the gaming sense, campy, and its a thing of good cheer.

Naturaly, its bucks women. The ideal normal is just a dude that lives day to day, makes a bit more, and stoicly nods his head when the toast is ready.

In the same sense, women are both tools and users. Im sure ill get in trouble going into the same detail, but they have very little responsive trouble thinking only for themselves. Not big on the underdog, assuredly.

You might do well to think on this. Not to be sobering.

edit: typo(s)

To the first: While an arranged version may or may not be more suited to your wedding, may I make a suggestion? Nothing says "nerd power" quite like Brentalfloss (don't worry, it's not comedy).

And to the second: There's no such thing as "normal". If only I'd figured that out years ago... heh.

Lara Crigger:
Love FAQ: With This Plasma Rifle, I Thee Wed

How do normal girls act?

Read Full Article

Hey, Master Chief:

It's your wedding--meaning you and your bride. If you're footing the bill, that's even more true. This is a day that you celebrate the public confirmation of a promise the two of you have basically already made (minus the paperwork). And the guests? They're being invited to share that with you.

While we certainly want to be gracious to our guests, this day is not for them. When it comes right down to it, do what you two want. If they're coming for the right reasons, it's to celebrate the two of you. If gaming is that big a part of who you are, then it should be part of the day. If your bride wants to jump over lava pits and break open ? blocks to get her ring, DO IT. If you want to choreograph an epic boss battle with your best man, during which you rescue your "princess" before saying your vows, DO IT!

Those that "get it" will love it. Those that don't "get it" will still get you. And hey, probably still get fed, too, even if it's little novelty mushrooms or potions. They're there to show support and love for you, not for the ceremony. And you're the one that's going to have all the pictures and video for years to come, right? Do you want to look back at them and say, "Wow, I'm sure glad we had the same wedding as everyone else?"

and No One to Co-op:

Don't worry. There's no such thing as losing or failing, so there's no need to stress whether or not you're giving the correct answers. The dating world isn't a quiz. It's closer to an interview... and you're the one conducting it.

Right now, you're seeking a person. And as a result, you're measuring yourself based on what you think they'll want--that's where this imaginary "standard" comes from. This way of thinking makes a certain sense, and it's the way we approach games: the game tells you what "winning" is, and you adapt your strategy (and yourself) to get there. But when you seek others, you end up letting them "adapt" you... which doesn't work, because it'll never feel natural.

Seek out yourself. Learn more about who you are and what you want and where you want to go. Do things that interest you. Try to find groups that do those things. Don't try to be "right" for anyone but yourself. The kind of person who is right for you is the kind of person you'll find on that path.

I see your concerns, guys, but as I say in the disclaimer, all letters to Love FAQ are completely anonymous. I mean it. I answer letters from both men and women, but I don't look at email addresses, and I certainly don't look at names. I go entirely with what's in the letter. And the sentence, "I don't talk about what standard girls talk about, and I don't do what standard girls like to do," implied to me that the writer was a woman.

Keep in mind, too, that, as usual, both letters had to be edited for brevity and/or identifying details. There are other cues that may have needed to be omitted for space reasons.

Thanks, everyone, for reading. I do read and appreciate all your feedback.

There's something so awesome about the idea playing the FF prelude that I um... I don't even know. Just that awesome.

My friends wife let him have a Pac man style dark chocolate cake, for the grooms cake which I thought was pretty neat. She wouldn't let him do anything more extreme, but we did get him some cosplaying strippers for his bachelor party so it was fine I suppose.

I wish my husband was more of a nerd, all I could get in was writing on our invites "would you kindly reply by such and such date". Of course one of our friends responded with a bad ass drawing of a big daddy on it, which really made my day, but nerding it out more would have been fun.

My friend on the other hand only got in a star fleet emblem really tiny on the wedding program so I suppose I'm pretty lucky.

On the second letter, I can relate but in a different way. I have a really hard time making friends, especially of the female variety. Yeah I read, and liked, the twilight books (yeah I said it) but I hate shopping and would much rather play hours of fallout of Mass Effect on end than, I don't know what many women do together, I can't figure out a comparison. From experience I would say that when they drag her to the bars to just smile and sit there, even if you don't feel like smiling. Guys in those situations do most of the work.

Pffft, I'm definitely walking down the isle to either Nobuo Uematsu or Shoji Meguro.
Great pick Master Chief. And congratulations!

Tell me: What, exactly, is a "standard" girl? Is it like a "standard" kilogram? Is there a woman-shaped slag of platinum alloy locked away in a French vault somewhere, gathering dust alongside the IPK?

Err, maybe you mean "slug" there? Because while "slag" does have a meaning at least peripherally relating to metal (it's the silicas and other junk left over once you've purified ore - in other words, the part of ore that ISN'T metal mixed with industrial waste) it doesn't fit as well as "slug" (meaning "a piece of typically lower-quality metal"). "Slag" also has the extra baggage of being an insulting term for a woman, which in this context almost insults the "average" girl.

Formica Archonis:

Tell me: What, exactly, is a "standard" girl? Is it like a "standard" kilogram? Is there a woman-shaped slag of platinum alloy locked away in a French vault somewhere, gathering dust alongside the IPK?

Err, maybe you mean "slug" there? Because while "slag" does have a meaning at least peripherally relating to metal (it's the silicas and other junk left over once you've purified ore - in other words, the part of ore that ISN'T metal mixed with industrial waste) it doesn't fit as well as "slug" (meaning "a piece of typically lower-quality metal"). "Slag" also has the extra baggage of being an insulting term for a woman, which in this context almost insults the "average" girl.

I think she actually meant "slab" there.

Aethren:
I think she actually meant "slab" there.

Maybe, though that tends to mean something big and flat, neither of which fits. But then "slug" is just as much a stretch in a different direction.

I think I know how I'll go for proposing :D
"With this ring, I thee biodamp"
cookies for knowing the reference :P

I completely sympathize with the writer of the second letter. I live in a small town and most things in geek culture are still relegated to the domain of children. I usually get made fun of for being 30 years old and still playing games and watching stuff like Star Wars (by people who watch and discuss 'raslin no less). Eh, what can you do? No point in changing your self just to suite others.

I'd just make this caution: just because you experience fear and anxiety in large public gatherings does NOT make you an introvert. An introvert ENJOYS being alone, and NEEDS alone time to "recharge". They are difficult to engage not because they dread going out but because they're perfectly content where they are. It *is* possible to be a socially-awkward extrovert. Or, worse, someone who is uncomfortable with themselves in general. This type of person will (generally) cling to other people for approval/recognition, but simultaneously dread groups of people because they don't GET that approval/recognition they desire from large groups, only from small groups or individuals. People with this difficulty will often also cling to whoever they already happen to know rather than seek out new friends they have more in common with.

If you find that you dislike being alone because you aren't happy with your own company and dislike large groups because you feel awkward/not-in-control, then working on fixing your self-disapproval is more important than trying to find strategies that make you comfortable with large groups. Once you are more comfortable with yourself, you will more easily be able to deal with other people.

"a choral version of Nobuo Uematsu's "Prelude""

I feel bad for that choir. Nothing but elaborate scales. Beautiful song, don't get me wrong, but the idea of having to sing it makes me shudder.

 

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