The One Time Knowledge of Elvish Battle Poetry Comes in Handy

The One Time Knowledge of Elvish Battle Poetry Comes in Handy

Being quick on the draw isn't always a good thing.

Read Full Article

For some reason these articles are my favorite on the Escapist. It must be because they are so well thought out and a joy to read.

Thank you Lara for another awesome article! Looking forward to the next one :)

I noticed you added some more gaming puns this time too. Very clever and did not detract from the overall message. The style is really good!

The Elvish battle poetry was genius. Genius!

Gets better every week Lara!

Hinkydink! Totally stealing that.

Great, insightful job.

How true that is about marriage. It's a lot of work every day and I think if you never consider other options then it's not really a commitment.

I've been married for over 3 years now and there have been ups and downs. I've met girls at work and had little crushes, but I know I don't want to cheat on my wife. I love her and she's all that I'll need for the rest of my life. But considering other options is the reason I'm so sure she's the one for me.

After folks get advice, do they ever write back with how things went? I think it would be cool to hear how some of these things turned out.

Wickerton:
After folks get advice, do they ever write back with how things went? I think it would be cool to hear how some of these things turned out.

More frequently than I expected, actually. Off the top of my head, I know we've gotten updates in the threads themselves from the bride-to-be from "With This Plasma Rifle I Thee Wed"; the "..Lead a Horse to Car Battery..." gamer looking for a Christian S&M switch; the loneliest Jedi looking to "Stick It in The Crazy"; and the real-life Alistair from "The Unbearable Lightness of Licking Lampposts", who'd asked how to tell his girlfriend he was a virgin.

I'm always delighted to hear back from people whose letters have been featured in the column; after all, they're why I'm doing this. (And because there's no money in elvish poetry anymore.)

While not feeling uncomfortable (for the most part) in my own romantic life, I still enjoy reading these articles. They're funny, well thought out and have some good advice, even for those without major problems.

Also: I appreciate anyone with a Fry avatar...

What is with all the sex questions, I don't want this site going down this road.

Just as a thought: If you're married and crushing on someone else, you might want to spend less time with that other person.

Ossian:
What is with all the sex questions, I don't want this site going down this road.

Shhhhh... don't worry, change won't kill you.

I love these articles, amusement to no end :D

The reference to an Eagles song makes this my favorite column on the Escapist right now.

Lara Crigger:
Love FAQ: The One Time Knowledge of Elvish Battle Poetry Comes in Handy

Being quick on the draw isn't always a good thing.

Read Full Article

Where can I find some of this Elvish Battle Poetry? I already know the Riddle of Strider and the inscription on Anduriel in Sindarin, and the Ring Poem in the Black Speech, but Elvish Battle Poetry might come in handy. If nothing else, it'll certainly impress my girlfriend. (Yes, I have a girlfriend now. You can safely disregard my last email XD)

Lara Crigger:
Love FAQ: The One Time Knowledge of Elvish Battle Poetry Comes in Handy

Being quick on the draw isn't always a good thing.

Read Full Article

To Elfroot:

Really, I'm rather impressed by the maturity and even-handedness of your husband's response. He sounds very understanding, and not prone to reflexively acting on emotion (ie, open jealousy and anger) -- head first, heart second. Strangely enough, it's a feature of some of the most empathetic people out there: they have the ability to feel things from another person's perspective because they're able to set their own aside first (for the time being).

And yet, in a lot of cases, that same sort of personality can create the illusion (after a year of marriage) that some of the "shine" has worn off. That early flurry of emotion subsides, and stability feels a little like stagnation by comparison.

Just realize that, in a lot of cases, novelty adds fuel to the fire of this new interest. Part of you may want to go back to the heart-first days of early love that you have, in a sense, traded away. You've traded that fleeting sense of "thrill" for something real and lasting, and that has a worth that isn't as apparent or urgent, but runs far deeper.

What am I getting at with all of this? Just by that little bit you mentioned of his response, it sounds like your husband is pretty well able to understand you when you communicate -- so don't be so quick to judge whether or not he can "get you" in the same way this other guy does.

Our subconscious will nearly always try to stack the deck in its own favor. If it wants something, it will manufacture reasons it is "superior." Usually, that's as simple as saying, "No one/nothing else makes me feel like..." when really the subconscious (which craves novelty) is just not letting anything else make us feel that way.

Lara is right, and you'll always feel stuff like this. It's not wrong at all to feel it, and it is quite wrong to act on it. But feelings also have sensible, traceable origins, and sometimes looking into those can teach us about ourselves.

Hmmm, elvish battle poetry? I'm not sure you would be done reciting it in time to still be aroused. I've heard that stuff can last a while.

Yeah you know, slowing down and pausing right at the brink, taking a few breaths, then continuing after the heat significantly lowers is what I have learned to do naturally through my teen years.

"Marriage isn't the Hotel California. You can leave any time you want." <- - - I love this.

double post

Lara Crigger:
gamer looking for a Christian S&M switch

I had to look that article up. I've been reading this but I missed that one. My reaction is thus:

Prof. Monkeypox:
While not feeling uncomfortable (for the most part) in my own romantic life, I still enjoy reading these articles. They're funny, well thought out and have some good advice, even for those without major problems.

Also: I appreciate anyone with a Fry avatar...

I second this. Thanks for the very enjoyable read.

 

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