Zero Punctuation: Gears of War 3

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I actually liked Gears of War 1.

It was a 3rd person shooter, back when those were rare, and I personally enjoy the 3rd person point of view much more than the 1st person point of view (It always feels like you're just a floating disembodied hand holding a gun to me). The cover mechanism of Gear of War was also relatively new. I'm not a big enough fan of shooter to know if this GoW was the innovator here, but it certainly was the trend setter. And while I know Yahtzee and many others really dislike the 'chest high wall shooter', I personally like them. It feels a bit more realistic and more tactical than the run & gun approach of older shooters - you have to find good cover and you have to try and outmaneuver the opponent (and in the case of the Mass Effect series, you need to use your allies to provide cover fire/distraction) and I find that a lot more engaging than running in a room and hope you're quick enough on the trigger to kill everything before they kill you.

That being said, I skipped Gear of War 2 (and haven't bought GoW3) mainly because I feel like I've gotten my shooter fix (that's how big of a shooter fan I am - i.e. not very) in between it and the few shooters I've played over the years.

One of the thing that struck me as odd in Yatzhee's review is that he says 'GoW3 is the vestige of a dying age' or something to that effect... but then praises and begs for the return to an older formula. For one thing, the GoW age isn't that old... and we're still in it. For another, seem counter productive to just want to go back to the way things were.

Daystar Clarion:
I don't think anybody buys Gears for the single player.

I bought it so I can chainsaw the shit out of high pitched American teenagers.

...I did.

Anyway, I had a sort-of not really hope that he might give this one a positive review because Gears 2 got one, but then this is a brown shooter with two weapons, a pistol, and a grenade limit. Funny enough, he only mentioned the gameplay in passing and never once pointed out anything wrong with it, this coming from a fellow who holds story in high regard but, if I'm not mistaken, says gameplay is more important, if only slightly so. That is, if I remember correctly. I'll have to find out where I heard that.

So I'm guessing he picked the story angle to make a video about. Fine by me, postitive ones are rarely as funny.

I thought both the game and review were excellent.

Daystar Clarion:
I don't think anybody buys Gears for the single player.

I bought it so I can chainsaw the shit out of high pitched American teenagers.

I did, I acctually think the story is quite decent compared to alot of stuff that gets released these days.

Frostbite3789:

immortalslayer90:
Gears 3 is the first Gears game I have ever bought, and I honestly dont understand what is so great about these games. Seems pretty avaerage to me. It certaintly doesn't seem all that special. Great review by Yahtzee as always.

It's one of the few 360 exclusives they can tout around town. What else do they have left? The Halo series that MS has decided to beat to death with a baseball bat?

Your point is well seen. And kind of depressing.

I bought this because my brothers both have it, and now that we live at opposite ends of the country its nice to have something to play online together. I think its a competent enough game, if thats what you like. That said, I have the following problems (spoilers will literally ruin the "story" for anyone that hasnt played it yet...) -

On top of these specific problems, the game really doesnt carry through any ideas it starts. Without going into any more detail, it just cant carry a consistent tone, with regards to the characters motivations, the story, even the setting. Gameplay-wise, fine, but not worth the paper the original story was written on.

major_chaos:
why am I less than amazed that he likes that steaming turd Hard Reset just because its "retro"

I don't remember him using the word retro.

This is pretty true about Gears. I remember jack about the plot to 2, and I'm pretty sure there was no plot to 1.

Nothing special about this game at all. Personally I hate third person shooters, and this game reminded me why. Aiming was kind of stupid, I was constantly playing with the inverted axis, and it really didn't teach you how to play at all. By the end of the game I still had no clue what was happening.

I don't think Yahtzee is wrong about anything that he says about the game. But despite the fact that the characters are shallow and the plot is forgetable, the game is fun to play. And that's what matters to me the most. Sometimes I'm in the mood for mindless slaughter from behind chest-high walls and no game does that better that Gears 3.

Gears of War 2 was the first ZP I watched and to this day I was imressed by how much he seemed to like something so generic. I guess this gives me some sort of closure on that matter :P

All I could say about this game is that the storyline was bad, the locations were dull but the co-op modes........were rather entertaining really. They at least burnt up a few hours for me and a few mates before being traded in at Gamestation.

One thing I remember clearly from GOW2 is the battle music, which played in EVERY SINGLE BATTLE. I even might remember the stages correctly and in order: city, forest, cave, worm, zombie stronghold, locust stronghold, and the finale in the city with the "shoot lazers at the dinosaur thing" at the end that posed no challenge.

It seems to be an extremely unpopular opinion, but I really enjoy the plot of Gears Of War and I wanted to know what happened. I also did in fact buy Gears 3 for the campaign.

I own GoW2... and have never played it...

Ever.

I think he might have been a bit harsh. I played GOW2 ages ago and can still remember everything about it. I consider it one of my favourite games ever.

Remember when Yahtzee said something on the lines of "It's not funny or interesting to like a game".

It's getting equally obnoxious to hear a guy hate stuff all the time.

JackandTom:
It seems to be an extremely unpopular opinion, but I really enjoy the plot of Gears Of War and I wanted to know what happened. I also did in fact buy Gears 3 for the campaign.

Seems we are a rare breed my friend. I thought the story line was great. The voice acting was something that stuck with me the whole way through aswell. I suspect the reason there are very few Gears supporters on here right now is because they are on their consoles playing it right now and HAVING FUN.

Yeah, I recall a major character dying in a scene that lasted for fucking ever with them turning up the sorrowful music to eleven and having him perform a completely unnecessary sacrifice (yeah, his gun was empty, how about asking one of the other dudes to shoot the tank while he drives away with the car???). That would've had more impact had it been sudden, a quick end to the constant smug quipping from the main characters who seem to live comfortably in the knowledge that the plot shields will keep them alive no matter how dangerous the situation is. A good dash of anyone-can-die would have livened it up a lot.

And then I say "no thank you, Gears". The series never interested me past the creature designs - that I'm pretty sure a crazy JRPG could rival. (....Or really, any genre)

I'm happy for the hard reset mention. I just played the demo and that first set of fights just screams "we love our work and put as much effort as possible into making it as much fun as it can be."

Plus its all about using the environment and has actual secrets, remember those?

Thank god he finally went for the fanboys! Seriously, fanboys claim that people who like Yahtzee take his word as gospel truth, but ironically, seem to be the ones who use his words to back their arguements most!

I would say I'm glad it's over but we know they'll be making another one since it's selling still. My best friend enjoys them and I've played the first two with him on co-op and Yahtzee is right, the story from both is not worth remembering. First game set off giant bombs to kill Locust, second game completely nullifies the first by saying the bombs did nothing. And the second doesn't even have that much focus going for it, it's all just there to set up the third game's new enemy.

As to the gameplay, I don't see what Gears of War has added. It created artificial looking rooms with lots of neat rows of cover that look completely out of place and it makes you stick to them. Why is that considered a gameplay innovation? What was wrong with the old systems of having to just move behind something while you reload or dodge a rocket or wait for a break in the enemy's firing pattern, or using crouch and lean buttons to make use of cover? This 'sticky' system seems to just railroad gamers into using paths the developers lay out by making the right way forward obvious by the path of chest high walls.

sravankb:
Remember when Yahtzee said something on the lines of "It's not funny or interesting to like a game".

It's getting equally obnoxious to hear a guy hate stuff all the time.

Also I completely agree with this. It will be his undoing in the end, people will just get sick of it. I know its funny for some people watching people get upset because a game which they spent big money on gets trashed but its just getting old. I remember reading the thread where he smashed WH40K and there were many unhappy faces that night.

To conclude. Its just not funny anymore.

Edit* IM NOT DONE DAMNIT!
If other reviewers said things that he said they would be hung drawn and quatered or their opinions barely even noticed.

My thrilling conclusion to Ben Croshaw and his constant negativity... Fuck off.

But, I'm a girl and have a sensibly proportioned neck and I don't miss the plot and character. But I guess it helps that I remember what little plot there is from the previous games and can still follow the story. Ah well, Gears of War is still vicariously fun with it's chainsaw bayonet vasectomies.

I've never actually played trough a GoW game, nor have I ever owned one. I have a friend that loves it, played one of them coop with him once. All i remember is a hospital of some sort.

Babitz:
This review was kind of "meh", but that's because the game itself is like that. There was really nothing to say about it since it's just a quick cash grab. Sadly, this won't stop it from being one of the best selling titles of the year.

Nope, but Skyrim and Battlefield 3 will! Wait, did that read "one of"? Damn...

believer258:
Anyway, I had a sort-of not really hope that he might give this one a positive review because Gears 2 got one, but then this is a brown shooter with two weapons, a pistol, and a grenade limit. Funny enough, he only mentioned the gameplay in passing and never once pointed out anything wrong with it, this coming from a fellow who holds story in high regard but, if I'm not mistaken, says gameplay is more important, if only slightly so. That is, if I remember correctly. I'll have to find out where I heard that.

He said the gameplay hasn't changed from GoW2, and he already went over the gameplay in his GoW2 review. What more do you want him to say about it?

rollerfox88:
I bought this because my brothers both have it, and now that we live at opposite ends of the country its nice to have something to play online together. I think its a competent enough game, if thats what you like. That said, I have the following problems (spoilers will literally ruin the "story" for anyone that hasnt played it yet...) -

On top of these specific problems, the game really doesnt carry through any ideas it starts. Without going into any more detail, it just cant carry a consistent tone, with regards to the characters motivations, the story, even the setting. Gameplay-wise, fine, but not worth the paper the original story was written on.

Hope that helped.:)

RagnaThePig:

major_chaos:
why am I less than amazed that he likes that steaming turd Hard Reset just because its "retro"

I don't remember him using the word retro.

I admit he never used the word retro so I shouldn't have used quotes what he said was that it was like painkiller which is the main example of the no regenerating health/ no iron sights/ no story style of shooter that he seems to love without question, and as someone who loves painkiller it annoys me when people compare it to hard reset which is absolutely horrible to the point where the main menu annoyed me

Wow,he really tore apart this game which wasn't surprising.

Got a few chuckles out of it which made my day a bit better.

Thank you for that Mr.Croshaw.

Daystar Clarion:
I don't think anybody buys Gears for the single player.

I bought it so I can chainsaw the shit out of high pitched American teenagers.

I do. I dislike multiplayer because every match just turns into a giant shotgun orgy within a second of the match starting. Funny video as always. Although my one gripe is that in the game no one ever mentioned the planet would explode. They only said everyone would be fucked, not exploded.

Von Strimmer:

JackandTom:
It seems to be an extremely unpopular opinion, but I really enjoy the plot of Gears Of War and I wanted to know what happened. I also did in fact buy Gears 3 for the campaign.

Seems we are a rare breed my friend. I thought the story line was great. The voice acting was something that stuck with me the whole way through aswell. I suspect the reason there are very few Gears supporters on here right now is because they are on their consoles playing it right now and HAVING FUN.

Well here's one more, absolutely loved the story, gameplay, voice acting, and even the brown/gray graphics (GoW 1, anyone?).

Speaking of using meta-game knowledge to deduce plot points...didn't everyone who played Deus Ex intuitively know that Adam's ex was still alive as soon as they saw that there were no romance-ish dialogue options with the pilot?

"I cannot understand how people can like this over Hard Reset"

o·pin·ion

1. A view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge.
2. The beliefs or views of a large number or majority of people about a particular thing.

There you go, Mr. Croshaw. Glad I could be of service.

No mention of Hoard or Beast? Oh well, but damn I never seen so much... dislike for Gears 3 here.

I always thought it had a neutral reaction, sure you got a few haters but not all at once like I'm reading here. Not to say everyone is wrong or is at fault, but I kind of bothers me in a way.

Then again I'm a loyal fan. Story is actually good(though yes its very confusing to newcomers) and I still consider its cover system to be the best. And I fucking love the multiplayer.

If you complimented the story I would say you were completely out of your mind, the game is entirely about chainsawing aliens and dudes shouting and whining in a "manly way". With that said, I am glad they replaced Dom with Billy Mays, though.

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