Taking Fashion Tips from Tim Curry and Other Matters of the Heart

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This was such a sad one!

I can't believe that the first girl has trouble meeting people. She sounds exactly like the sort of girl that I would love to meet. I love women that aren't afraid to be themselves. It sucks that girls like this are extremely rare in my neck of the woods and I would respectfully disagree with Lara on this one. if she's wearing pink hair and corsets at the grocery store then more power to her. She'll find the Brad to her Janet eventually.

EDT: I'm not 100% familiar with the Rocky Horror Picture show in case you couldn't tell. I can timewarp like a motherfucker though.

I can empathise with the second guy too. I went through a similar situation with a girl. We had an up and down relationship for most of a year and thought moving in together would settle the waters. Man was that a mistake. Took a whole other year to extricate myself from that flat, another few months to finish paying the bills and the flat was in her name so she got the whole deposit back again.

It's horrible. I'd advise him to get the hell out as fast as possible.

The third girl really hurt most of all though, who hasn't been in her shoes when you fall in love with someone who's already dating someone else?

I would be depressed if Lara hadn't given such good advice (even the first bit of advice made sense, even if I personally disagreed). Fun article as always. Keep up the good work!

Just skimmed through, and I have to say the over the topness of FnF actually sounds like a fun person to be around... I personally wouldn't find the attire intimidating, but I realize I'm not everyone. Anyway, interesting as always when I read through it, even if I usually do just skim unless something catches my eye.

I'll just go back to counting my money and being single XD

If you want to meet guys, you have to go somewhere that there are guys. When I moved town, I joined a society at the nearest college to me (over here, you don't have to be a student at the college to join - they just like to have people with the same interests involved). I met a lot of guys there and dated a few.

Societies are better than bars as a) no-one's drunk, b) you can hear what the other person has to say and c) you already have a common interest.

Whether it's formula one racing, gaming (and if you send an email to someone working for the escapist, then it's probably gaming) or some other "manly" pursuit find the nearest club/society/group and talk to people.

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

For my part I'm just slightly heartened that it's not ONLY the guys who are having problems.:/

Formica Archonis:

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

Agreed.

I love my awesome outfits, and I love my awesomely dyed hair, but I do tone it back depending on where I'm going. If I'm going out to the mall to hang out with my boyfriend, I'll pull out the fishnets and the corset tops. If I'm going to class, I'll settle for some skinny jeans and a cardigan. And then other days I just look like a proper girl in a sundress, still with the funky hair though.

Basically, my clothes don't define me. I am fucking awesome, regardless of what I'm wearing, and I definitely don't need the help of bits of cloth to prove that awesomeness. If clothing actually represented who you are as a person, you would cease to be yourself every time you got naked, which is a ridiculous thought. It's important to learn to be yourself no matter what wrapper you're wearing.

Also, what is the deal with people jumping into cohabitation/marriage so quickly anymore? Four months of dating and then moving in? No wonder that's ending up so badly! People really need to slow down with relationships, maybe then they would last longer.

daftalchemist:
Also, what is the deal with people jumping into cohabitation/marriage so quickly anymore? Four months of dating and then moving in? No wonder that's ending up so badly! People really need to slow down with relationships, maybe then they would last longer.

It cost an unbelievable amount of money to live these days. Most people have most of their paycheque going straight to rent and food with nothing left over. When two people live together they save such a staggering amount of money that it actually makes living and saving money a possibility. People also like being with people they like.

Not saying it's a good idea or a bad one, just offering some reasons why people do it.

gallaetha_matt:
This was such a sad one!

I can't believe that the first girl has trouble meeting people. She sounds exactly like the sort of girl that I would love to meet. I love women that aren't afraid to be themselves. It sucks that girls like this are extremely rare in my neck of the woods and I would respectfully disagree with Lara on this one. if she's wearing pink hair and corsets at the grocery store then more power to her. She'll find the Brad to her Janet eventually.

EDT: I'm not 100% familiar with the Rocky Horror Picture show in case you couldn't tell. I can timewarp like a motherfucker though.

I can empathise with the second guy too. I went through a similar situation with a girl. We had an up and down relationship for most of a year and thought moving in together would settle the waters. Man was that a mistake. Took a whole other year to extricate myself from that flat, another few months to finish paying the bills and the flat was in her name so she got the whole deposit back again.

It's horrible. I'd advise him to get the hell out as fast as possible.

The third girl really hurt most of all though, who hasn't been in her shoes when you fall in love with someone who's already dating someone else?

I would be depressed if Lara hadn't given such good advice (even the first bit of advice made sense, even if I personally disagreed). Fun article as always. Keep up the good work!

It's funny cause the time warp, as well as the show, is all about free love (It's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane)

It's been said, but responding to the first letter:

Intimidating? Yes.

Hot? Very yes.

I'm a pretty shy guy; I feel very uncomfortable approaching people I don't know (or, really, anyone I'm not close friends with), especially if that person is particularly attractive. However, it'd make my day if such a girl approached me.

To put another spin on the column's response: breaking the ice can be a challenge for anybody. Dressing like that raises an even thicker wall of ice around yourself. However, I'd say it also gives you a bigger hammer for breaking anyone else's. So if you want to keep dressing that way, the path of least resistance has you taking the initiative.

I think Lara is dead on with the 'Wanting' girl. People really need evaluate what they expect to happen when those feelings are shared. If your love interest is in a happy, committed relationship, what could possibly be gained by confessing your feelings? Best case scenario you might be greeted with indifference. Worst case, they no longer feel comfortable interacting with you and you lose a friend. Unless you honestly expect them to drop everything and return the sentiment, what's the point besides making things awkward?

Formica Archonis:

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

I wonder if there might be a little more to say to 'Wanting'. Like, how about just coming out? It doesn't have to be done via, "Hey, neat game tonight! Btw I forgot to mention: I'm super homosexual. I know your boyfriend's the DM but do you want to lez out, dump him, run off to Aruba and get gay married?"

That kind of thing generally freaks anybody out because it's really high pressure. But the sad fact is that a lot of girls who will later realize they were really into other girls date guys for a while too. Probably the best approach is either to just generally let people know you're not heterosexual without specifically directing it at somebody, or get into a low stress situation (say you've both been drinking, you're getting along well and you're fairly isolated) and make a move. Odds are good she'll either be into it or laugh it off. It hurts to get turned down, but at least you'll know then.

It's a hard choice and there are long odds that anybody dating anybody else will spontaneously break up with their SO if you show interest, but you're not doing yourself any favors sexually speaking living in the closet. Who knows? It might turn out somebody you hadn't even thought of will come out of the woodwork who is available and obviously interested.

Formica Archonis:

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

Oh man, I'm glad I'm not the only one. Reading that description made me think she's perfect for not only blokes that have written in, but a fair few other ones too. Odd really XD

Formica Archonis:

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

For my part I'm just slightly heartened that it's not ONLY the guys who are having problems.:/

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

Knowing full well that the first page of comments would be filled with: "OMG, that sounds liek someone I would love to meet!"

"You sound like you are my type!"

"I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS THAT YOU FORGOT ABOUT UNTIL JUST NOW!"

And I was not disappointed, Thank you Escapist Guys, stay classy.

OT: First girl, I hate to say it, but she sounds like she would be right at home at a local Hot Topic, granted she didn't exactly say what kind of guys she was into, but still.

I also kind of hate people that "are not into the bar scene" or who think that looking for love through work is bad or lame.

As if those were the only two ways you can find someone to date.

Go to your local game or comic store, go to the mall, go to the park, the library, the list can go on.

If you cant find someone to love, you really are not looking hard enough.

To U-Haul Truck: BUHAHAHAHAHA, that slaps me on the knee.

But seriously, what did you expect? that everything magically goes right with no input by either of you?

Moving in is the step either right before marriage or right after, usually by that time you already have come to some sort of understanding on what your budget can and cannot handle.

To Wanting:

You either want to know what they think, or you dont.

if you are afraid of what will happen if you say anything, then deep down you dont actually want to know.

She already has a boyfriend, and she could already be happy with him. As you said, you are still young, and there will be more people later on.

Still though, if you still like her, and should they break up, as we guys say... "its free game".

Let's just get this one out of the way right now.
Miss Frank-N-Furter,
Call me!

Anyway, It's honestly refreshing to see letters like the last one, as I think the biggest roadblock to gays being accepted 100% open in society is just treating them as NORMAL. None of this "eeeew that's nasty" or even "I totally accept you and your alternative lifestyle". Neither mindsets help. Just don't let it matter to you.

I'd like to say that's already happening, but it ain't...well, at least, not very quickly.

sprout:
Best case scenario you might be greeted with indifference. Worst case, they no longer feel comfortable interacting with you and you lose a friend. Unless you honestly expect them to drop everything and return the sentiment, what's the point besides making things awkward?

I think that's the problem: The pervasive romantic ideal where the hero confesses his love to the heroine and she immediately dumps the evil prince to go live with the hero in his kingdom happily ever after. With the standard idea being "love conquers all" and the nature of media to act as if infatuation is the same as love, people sometimes forget that real life is not a romantic fantasy and they're not the hero, particularly if their explicit desire is to break up a seemingly healthy relationship for their own gain.


rsvp42:
It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

Or they could just plain ol' lie. But that just means they're setting themselves up for getting inapplicable advice and we have no way to prove it. I'm sure a few gems have snuck by every advice columnist, even the ones like Dan Savage who pride themselves on having a bullshit detector.

So we might as well take it at face value because it's all we have to go off of. Otherwise every time we see an "I can't find love" question we might as well mentally append the line "Also, I take my dead, stuffed poodle Snuffly with me whenever I go out. I talk to it and buy it drinks." and write them off.


Kalezian:
I also kind of hate people that "are not into the bar scene" or who think that looking for love through work is bad or lame.

In her defense, she did say "meeting anyone through work isn't an option", which is completely different from not doing it. Where I work it's not an option either, as I work with computers and the employee gender ratio runs four men per woman. And all the women are already married.

Formica Archonis:

rsvp42:
It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

Or they could just plain ol' lie. But that just means they're setting themselves up for getting inapplicable advice and we have no way to prove it. I'm sure a few gems have snuck by every advice columnist, even the ones like Dan Savage who pride themselves on having a bullshit detector.

So we might as well take it at face value because it's all we have to go off of. Otherwise every time we see an "I can't find love" question we might as well mentally append the line "Also, I take my dead, stuffed poodle Snuffly with me whenever I go out. I talk to it and buy it drinks." and write them off.

True, but something seems to be missing. Doesn't really matter though because even if she's ugly or obnoxious, learning to dress better is still a step in the right direction. I guess I just chuckle at the thought of users here imagining some perfect, hot girl (with garish clothing) instead of reading between the lines and realizing there's probably more than just her clothing working against her.

rsvp42:

Formica Archonis:

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

Yeah but no one wants to hear that the reason they can't get a guy(or girl) is because they are an uggo

Kalezian:

Formica Archonis:

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

For my part I'm just slightly heartened that it's not ONLY the guys who are having problems.:/

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

Knowing full well that the first page of comments would be filled with: "OMG, that sounds liek someone I would love to meet!"

"You sound like you are my type!"

"I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS THAT YOU FORGOT ABOUT UNTIL JUST NOW!"

And I was not disappointed, Thank you Escapist Guys, stay classy.

I'm assuming you disapprove of this practice, in which case I agree with you, there is way to much information left out of that letter to decide whether you would actually want to get to know her.

Lara Crigger:
Love FAQ: Taking Fashion Tips from Tim Curry and Other Matters of the Heart

Dating can be a Rocky Horror.

Read Full Article

I think we could probably go a little easier on U-Haul's girl. These are both two kids that got in way too deep, way too fast. The fact that he is realizing it first doesn't mean she is a nutcase.

1. You mention "you took her virginity." I take this to also mean that you were "experienced" at the time. She has placed a lot of emotional value on that -- it's a huge risk for a young girl to give that away, and she's going to be a little bit paranoid about abandonment. Welcome to the world of young girls inexperienced in sex -- it is a normal and understandable (though unpleasant) reaction.

2. You've been together less than a year, and you've moved in together. An apartment lease is usually at least a year. To say you both rushed this decision is like saying the ocean is "moist." That kind of rushed "commitment" fuels clinginess -- the faster you commit to that, the more noticeable it is when you back up even a little.

3. You are planning to leave her. Doesn't that sort of validate her concern, in a twist of slight irony? She may not be handling it well, but she's not wrong.

4. She's paying rent? And whose name is the lease in? What she does with her money is her business at that point. If she's paying for rent and food for two, then paying rent and food for one won't kill her -- doesn't sound to me like you're "supporting her financially."

Basically, if you want out, just get out. But why so much effort to badmouth the girl while you do it? The more blame you assign to her, the less likely it is that you're actually learning anything from the incredible mistakes you have made.

(edit: accidentally quoted myself instead of hitting "edit")

You were the more experienced one -- of course you "figured it out" first.

Seriously, we're acting like she's an idiot that's beyond all hope. It's like a college student thinking a middle school is "stupid" because he doesn't know Calculus yet. You helped draw her into this situation, you helped spearhead this monumental failure. Try not to be so high-and-mighty toward the girl.

artanis_neravar:

rsvp42:

Formica Archonis:

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

Yeah but no one wants to hear that the reason they can't get a guy(or girl) is because they are an uggo

Kalezian:

Formica Archonis:

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

For my part I'm just slightly heartened that it's not ONLY the guys who are having problems.:/

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

Knowing full well that the first page of comments would be filled with: "OMG, that sounds liek someone I would love to meet!"

"You sound like you are my type!"

"I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS THAT YOU FORGOT ABOUT UNTIL JUST NOW!"

And I was not disappointed, Thank you Escapist Guys, stay classy.

I'm assuming you disapprove of this practice, in which case I agree with you, there is way to much information left out of that letter to decide whether you would actually want to get to know her.

She said pink hair and corsets, while I myself think corsets look sexy if done right, having both pink hair [which I am imagining is in a semi-dreadlock or cluttered state, at the very least in a type of Ramona hairdo, just making assumptions] would indeed make me think twice if I actually wanted to get to know her.

She could deep down be a really nice person who is just having bad luck.

or, she could have a closet full of taxidermy squirrels poised in scenes from Red Dwarf.

Stupid double post

Dastardly:

Dastardly:

Lara Crigger:
Love FAQ: Taking Fashion Tips from Tim Curry and Other Matters of the Heart

Dating can be a Rocky Horror.

Read Full Article

I think we could probably go a little easier on U-Haul's girl. These are both two kids that got in way too deep, way too fast. The fact that he is realizing it first doesn't mean she is a nutcase.

1. You mention "you took her virginity." I take this to also mean that you were "experienced" at the time. She has placed a lot of emotional value on that -- it's a huge risk for a young girl to give that away, and she's going to be a little bit paranoid about abandonment. Welcome to the world of young girls inexperienced in sex -- it is a normal and understandable (though unpleasant) reaction.

2. You've been together less than a year, and you've moved in together. An apartment lease is usually at least a year. To say you both rushed this decision is like saying the ocean is "moist." That kind of rushed "commitment" fuels clinginess -- the faster you commit to that, the more noticeable it is when you back up even a little.

3. You are planning to leave her. Doesn't that sort of validate her concern, in a twist of slight irony? She may not be handling it well, but she's not wrong.

4. She's paying rent? And whose name is the lease in? What she does with her money is her business at that point. If she's paying for rent and food for two, then paying rent and food for one won't kill her -- doesn't sound to me like you're "supporting her financially." Sounds like she's supporting you.

Basically, if you want out, just get out. But why so much effort to badmouth the girl while you do it? The more blame you assign to her, the less likely it is that you're actually learning anything from the incredible mistakes you have made.

You were the more experienced one -- of course you "figured it out" first.

Seriously, we're acting like she's an idiot that's beyond all hope. It's like a college student thinking a middle school is "stupid" because he doesn't know Calculus yet. You helped draw her into this situation, you helped spearhead this monumental failure. Try not to be so high-and-mighty toward the girl.

This seems to have touched a nerve (just an observation not trying get you into an argument) I'm not saying your wrong, in fact I agree with you, although that wasn't the best example because stupid is relative, so a middle school is "stupid" compared to a college student, then again I know many college students who can't do basic algebra so you can draw the same conclusion there.

Kalezian:

artanis_neravar:

rsvp42:

It's possible that her clothes aren't the only thing turning guys off (or at least guys in bars). All we know from this description is generally how she dresses, so we can only guess how she looks or how she acts around people. I always like to assume the best, but sometimes I think people omit important details in these letters.

Yeah but no one wants to hear that the reason they can't get a guy(or girl) is because they are an uggo

Kalezian:

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

Knowing full well that the first page of comments would be filled with: "OMG, that sounds liek someone I would love to meet!"

"You sound like you are my type!"

"I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS THAT YOU FORGOT ABOUT UNTIL JUST NOW!"

And I was not disappointed, Thank you Escapist Guys, stay classy.

I'm assuming you disapprove of this practice, in which case I agree with you, there is way to much information left out of that letter to decide whether you would actually want to get to know her.

She said pink hair and corsets, while I myself think corsets look sexy if done right, having both pink hair [which I am imagining is in a semi-dreadlock or cluttered state, at the very least in a type of Ramona hairdo, just making assumptions] would indeed make me think twice if I actually wanted to get to know her.

She could deep down be a really nice person who is just having bad luck.

or, she could have a closet full of taxidermy squirrels poised in scenes from Red Dwarf.

I was thinking her hair looked more like this


But either way that's exactly my point.

artanis_neravar:
This seems to have touched a nerve (just an observation not trying get you into an argument) I'm not saying your wrong, in fact I agree with you, although that wasn't the best example because stupid is relative, so a middle school is "stupid" compared to a college student, then again I know many college students who can't do basic algebra so you can draw the same conclusion there.

We only disagree slightly.

To me, "stupid" is when someone should know something and they do not. A middle school isn't expected to know Calculus -- so it would be ridiculous of a university math major to think, "Man, that middle schooler is an idiot! He can't even do basic derivation!" It's a false sense of superiority brought about by intellectual bullying.

But plenty of people do it. We look back at someone who is where we used to be, and we treat them like they're a total moron. We do it as a way of saying (to ourselves), "Look how not like that I am now." Instead of recognizing this person is just chronologically behind us on the exact same journey.

Kalezian:

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

"You sound like you are my type!"

I am offended/outraged that you'd use my words to speculate like that. I don't get offended by things I see here very often, so you probably get some sort of prize for that. Don't lump me in there with the woman-hating-ladder-theory-paedophile-enabling-drugs-are-bad humps that seem to post this sort've stuff, I implore you - we just don't get many goth/geek/interestingly dressed girls in Liverpool, England. Mostly because other girls try to ridicule your originality as early as possible and it breaks my heart to see a trusted internet advice source doing the same thing that five years of bullying seems to do to so many girls round here.

Was 'I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS' the creepiest thing you could think of? Because if it is I just wanna hug you and protect you from the internet.

I wish someone would've done that to me. I used to be such a Sonic The Hedgehog fan, Kalezian. Such a fan...

artanis_neravar:
It's funny cause the time warp, as well as the show, is all about free love (It's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane)

I totally need to watch the movie again. Not only might it refresh my memory but it's been too long since I saw a character actor in drag. It might remind me of my childhood too.

The only things I got out of this were:

1) the definition of sartorial.
2) continued proof that guys and girls aren't actually all that much different.

Not really helpful to be honest :/.

First letter, to the girl looking for love.

You always dress for your target audience, trying to find love is like sales, this time you trying to sell yourself. Just think about what kind of dudes you're into would be into and get yourself into it, I'm referring only to cloths here.

Just as you wouldn't try to sell a FPS with a picture of mario on the box, you don't just dress however you want and expect to find dudes you want.

Second letter,

People grows, the girl probably didn't have much experience with love, moving in, etc.

Before doing something drastic you should try to talk to her, communicate, like the way you wrote your letter. Talk to her about what's bothering you. Give her and yourself a chance to grow together.

Responding to the last letter:
If a boy I knew told me he had long fawned over me, I would feel pretty cool and awesome. I can be bi towards certain kinds of boys in certain situations, but even if he didn't fit those variables, I wouldn't be bothered or want to nudge a little bit away from him.

Whenever I hear someone like the first girl I just assume that they are ugly and/or fat. I don't want to sound like a horrible person but for a woman to have serious trouble finding a boyfriend it usually means they are not very attractive. Whereas even a decent looking guy can have trouble if he has personality problems yet many men will put up with a lot if the girl's look it right.

gallaetha_matt:

Kalezian:

I actually laughed a bit when I started reading that question.

"You sound like you are my type!"

I am offended/outraged that you'd use my words to speculate like that. I don't get offended by things I see here very often, so you probably get some sort of prize for that. Don't lump me in there with the woman-hating-ladder-theory-paedophile-enabling-drugs-are-bad humps that seem to post this sort've stuff, I implore you - we just don't get many goth/geek/interestingly dressed girls in Liverpool, England. Mostly because other girls try to ridicule your originality as early as possible and it breaks my heart to see a trusted internet advice source doing the same thing that five years of bullying seems to do to so many girls round here.

Was 'I WANT TO EAT YOUR LEFTOVERS' the creepiest thing you could think of? Because if it is I just wanna hug you and protect you from the internet.

I wish someone would've done that to me. I used to be such a Sonic The Hedgehog fan, Kalezian. Such a fan...

artanis_neravar:
It's funny cause the time warp, as well as the show, is all about free love (It's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane)

I totally need to watch the movie again. Not only might it refresh my memory but it's been too long since I saw a character actor in drag. It might remind me of my childhood too.

oh, I could of thought of far, far worse things, but I dont particularly feel like getting warned/probation'd/banned, so I went with something that would sound surreal and creepy, yet realistic.

I can lump people in the the same group, however, when they do indeed fall within my purview [hah, I can use big words also!] of expectations.

also:

trusted internet advice source

....you actually believe, even with a disclaimer and everything, that the people who wrote in should follow what Lara Crigger says?

This is the internet.

and yes, I feel as if this video is needed for this situation:

Kalezian:

oh, I could of thought of far, far worse things, but I dont particularly feel like getting warned/probation'd/banned, so I went with something that would sound surreal and creepy, yet realistic.

I can lump people in the the same group, however, when they do indeed fall within my purview [hah, I can use big words also!] of expectations.

Oh, sweetheart. You thought that was me using big words? Bless your adorable, thrice-knit cotton socks.

Also, finish your sentence.

'I can lump people in the the same group, however, when they do indeed fall within my purview [hah, I can use big words also!] of expectations.'

What do you do to people that fall within your purview of expectations? Do you eat their leftovers?

What am I doing... this isn't me at all. I don't wanna get dragged into an internet battle over this. Not on the escapist forum anyway. I just didn't want to be put with the ladder theory crowd. Maybe I was projecting quite hard with my initial post, I dunno.

Can I extend an honest internet handshake? Seriously, I don't want to be a dick online. That's not my usual internet habit whatsoever.

[quotew] also:

trusted internet advice source

....you actually believe, even with a disclaimer and everything, that the people who wrote in should follow what Lara Crigger says?

This is the internet.

and yes, I feel as if this video is needed for this situation:

[/quote]

I dunno. There are worse people to get advice from. Like old testament God. She'd be all 'I don't think I can find love wearing Rocky Horror Picture Show Outfits' and he'd be all 'PLAGUE OF FUCKING LOCUSTS IN YOUR SKIN FOR BEING DIFFERENT!'

This time though I saw fragments of the female bullies I went to school with in her advice and thought I had to say some words. I could be wrong but in this instance Lara seemed to be trying to be break people into the cycle, much nicer than the girls I went to school with, but it was there nonetheless.

I did enjoy the internets video though, truly. It's gonna be stuck in my head for days.

EDT: I am so horrible at quoting people. It is my undoing.

Formica Archonis:

I'm a 19-year-old girl looking for love.
(...)
My look could be described as geek chic meets Rocky Horror, but apparently that's not attractive to the type of people I'm attracted to.

And I think I just heard every guy who's written in with a "looking for love" question screaming "WHERE ARE YOU?"

Agreed XD

Hmm, I understand where Miss Frank is coming from as a lot of my friends tend to dress over-the-top. All I can say is that if that's what you like, I would say stick with it. More power for wearing it to the bank and such. I think the biggest problem is where you search for guys. Obviously your average guy that would find you attractive and such is not going to be at a bar (unless its something like the mana bar) so I'd suggest trying maybe... Ohh I dunno a coffee shop, internet cafe, someplace along those lines.

Feel really bad for Mr. U-haul. I'd have to agree though. Get the -FUCK- out of there. It does not matter what she thinks, if she's as bad as she's coming off to be, the only thing you can do is get out. Quickly. If she threatens to hurt herself, call the police. If she threatens to hire someone to hurt you, make sure to record the call, then call the police. Definetly save up to get out of there though...

In response to wanting... Well, unfortunatly I've been in a similar role so I'd have to just say push it out of the way as there's no point in trying. It'll just lead to awkward moments and possibly ruin your friendship/whatever you have... I had a slightly similar experience at homecoming. Girl I had known for three years, took them to homecoming (with a few other friends), bought her roses, then right as I'm about to ask her if she wanted to go out on a date some time as more than just friends, some scrawny little punk who I've never seen before (and didn't see for the rest of my time there) sneaks up and whispers something in her ear... Turns out she'd been drooling over him for the past two years and he asked her if she wanted to go out with him... Being the daring idiot that I am, I mustered up the courage to ask that question at the end of the dance and well... It was awkward and she's barely spoken to me in two weeks now. *sigh* It's better to just let it go than ruin something. I understand how hard it might be, but in the end it only creates an awkward moment. Doubly-so if she has a boyfriend...

Dastardly:

artanis_neravar:
This seems to have touched a nerve (just an observation not trying get you into an argument) I'm not saying your wrong, in fact I agree with you, although that wasn't the best example because stupid is relative, so a middle school is "stupid" compared to a college student, then again I know many college students who can't do basic algebra so you can draw the same conclusion there.

We only disagree slightly.

To me, "stupid" is when someone should know something and they do not. A middle school isn't expected to know Calculus -- so it would be ridiculous of a university math major to think, "Man, that middle schooler is an idiot! He can't even do basic derivation!" It's a false sense of superiority brought about by intellectual bullying.

But plenty of people do it. We look back at someone who is where we used to be, and we treat them like they're a total moron. We do it as a way of saying (to ourselves), "Look how not like that I am now." Instead of recognizing this person is just chronologically behind us on the exact same journey.

Interesting how you define stupid is how i define ignorant although now that I look it up I have it backwards, either way both words carry to much weight in our society to be applied to middle schoolers who don't know how to solve basic differential equations

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