Jimquisition: Mass Effect 3: A Gay Erotic Love Story

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So are people complaining about the gay options in Mass Effect 3? Is that what this is about? Maybe I'm one of the few people not paying attention to all the people bitching and moaning about what is wrong in Mass Effect 3, Bioware, EA, the mole people, Antarctica, Universal Studious, and some annoying man-child's mother's bedroom, but I am not aware of such complaints. Wouldn't surprise me, though. But there are never complaints about games allowing for lesbian relationships. And personally, I'm happy just ignoring gay relationships in games. Call me weird, but I can totally do that with no issues.

After watching this, I can see the reason for the age verification. It definitely more than blurred a few lines.

Syntax Man:
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo, lemme get this straight, Jim and Yahtzee can cus like sailors and the thing is fine with that, but an the mere mention of homosexuality it age gates the fucking thing?

Real mature, seems that this world still has a long way to go.

Mature? Kettle = black. It's not the homosexuality, as much as you want to believe. It's the sexually explicit content. That's obvious to probably 95% of people.

I have the sudden desire to play FFIX again.

That was ... oddly arousing. I'M NOT GAY

Seriously, though, that was very entertaining.

Since Jim didn't say it, allow me: Thank god for Jim Sterling.

But seriously, what on earth did I just watch?

Griffolion:
I'm sensing a poke at something underneath all this. Was there some sort of controversy about homosexuality in ME3 that I missed?

Jennifer Helper (a writer for bioware) made a twitter account last week, and closed it soon after because of several people trolling her for including homosexual characters in games, among other things.

That was
*wipes a tear away*
beautiful.

OT:
I can choose to play multiplayer, oh no.
I can choose between action, story and traditional playstyle, oh no.
I can choose to make my Shepard gay, oh no.
Can someone explain to me why people have such problems with OPTIONS? It's not only Shepard's sexuality, Bioware has added quite a few things which are only optional and people complain about them. I just don't get it. Can someone enlighten me?

Anyway, I always wondered why ME 1 and 2 didn't have any gay options. It's not like Bioware is strictly against them, if you look at DA:O for example.

Zydrate:

geier:
This was the first Jimquisition that was to boring to watch, i skipped in 30 second steps.

Basically.

I was hoping it was some kind of "Shut the hell up" to all the homophobes regarding ME3. Alas, twas not so.

The whole video basically says "Shut the hell up" to all the homophobes regarding ME3.

With the age verification at the beginning I was thinking an insane slew of profanity(even Yahtzee doesn't have any age verification and he swears nearly constantly), this was... unexpected.

Now what exactly is the name of this "song from FFIX" so I can go download it?

beetrain:

Griffolion:
I'm sensing a poke at something underneath all this. Was there some sort of controversy about homosexuality in ME3 that I missed?

Jennifer Helper (a writer for bioware) made a twitter account last week, and closed it soon after because of several people trolling her for including homosexual characters in games, among other things.

I'd have figured including homosexuality as a dimension in inter-character relationships would only serve to add depth to the world. Perhaps i'm wrong on that one?

And yes, I vaguely heard of what was going on with that woman. Say what you want about her writing (as that is a purely subjective decision) but there was honestly no justification for those people calling her a fat whore etc.

Beryl77:

Zydrate:

geier:
This was the first Jimquisition that was to boring to watch, i skipped in 30 second steps.

Basically.

I was hoping it was some kind of "Shut the hell up" to all the homophobes regarding ME3. Alas, twas not so.

The whole video basically says "Shut the hell up" to all the homophobes regarding ME3.

I'm afraid it's too subtle.

Syntax Man:
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo, lemme get this straight, Jim and Yahtzee can cus like sailors and the thing is fine with that, but an the mere mention of homosexuality it age gates the fucking thing?

Real mature, seems that this world still has a long way to go.

As for the actual episode...what the flying fuck was that?

You watched the video. That was a lot more than simply mentioning homosexuality. That was a full blown 8 minutes of Mass Effect slash.

...and THAT'S why i create femsheps ^^

didn't have to laugh so hard to any previous episode though - thank gay for gay

OniaPL:
Now what exactly is the name of this "song from FFIX" so I can go download it?

"Loss of Me".

Definitely one of the best tracks in that game.

Syntax Man:
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo, lemme get this straight, Jim and Yahtzee can cus like sailors and the thing is fine with that, but an the mere mention of homosexuality it age gates the fucking thing?

Real mature, seems that this world still has a long way to go.

As for the actual episode...what the flying fuck was that?

I have a feeling that it was more to do with the fact that there was a lot of eroticism in that video... and I'd wager, that had they had the same sort of post instead with a heterosexual theme there would have been the same verification requirement.

But for a while there I wasn't sure whether or not Jim was being homophobic, then I realized at the end that he was trying to make a point that people who claim that ME3 will make you gay are just that, total irrational homophobes.

NikolaiK:
Also, i'm not sure many of you will get this, but Jim really reminds me of Garth Marenghi in this video.

I really got that vibe too. Yay for obscure Channel 4 comedies. Great video too.

And people wonder why I play Femshep. Heck, get all my created characters together and I'll have an army of snarky redheaded lesbians.

Yeah, so, I watched, like, half of this.

Does it get funny at some point? Is there some clever twist? Or is it just an eight-minute troll?

*sigh* I was just starting to like him, too...

McMarbles:

*sigh* I was just starting to like him, too...

Oh please. If one screw up is enough to make you dislike something, you're going to be a very bored and lonely human.

Ah yes, bashing the ignorant, deluded, one-celled organisms. Very good, though I doubt them homophobes will get it... I mean, they're brains aren't that evolved to pick-up satirical, ironical and/or sarcastic undertones, right?

This was rather awkward for me to watch,but I managed through it all.

I really hope that this option of same sex romances won't ruin the whole experience,for me at least,such as the characters you've encountered throughout the two games and known what their "preference" is when it comes to partners.

And now they suddenly are bi? That's...wrong in my eyes.

PS: No offense to the bi/gay community.

Ergh... boredom. I usually mildly enjoy Jim but this one is just dull.

Edit: Ok, -finally- got to the point where Jim actually implied what he was trying to get at - i.e. the bullshit some fans where on about before, where they said 'Allowing gay romance would ruin' their game and threaten them.

BUT I have to say, Jim, you could have done this alot better.

That was fucking stupid. What was the point? Where was the comedy? I can't believe I am saying this, but Jim Sterling just wasted 8 minutes of my life.

Lovely just so poetic...
Such a thrilling way of words
Such a lubricated way of telling

This video... that story, so... amazing, can't hold it in anymore, I'm going to... HNNG

The best story ever finally was read aloud by its genius author. Well done Jim. Well done.

Kojiro ftt:
I can't believe I am saying this, but Jim Sterling just wasted 8 minutes of my life.

That's what she said.

I could not stop laughing. That was one of the best things I've ever seen on the internet. Thank you Jim. Thank you.

I hate to say it but Jim summed up the majority of Mass Effect fans.
I never understood Mass Effect, making the fandom into erotic fantasy makes the whole thing comprehendable to non-fans. Even if the fans aren't actually gay, you guys sound gay when you talk about it (seriously think how you guys sound). Also it is a good analogy how EA treats it's customer base.

Nice knock against Origins as well.

+1 to Jim for reading the story of his PS Vita and keeping a straight face the whole time.

I'm not exactly an expert on erotica but don't give up your day job Jim...this didn't get me excited at all.

or is it a parable on how all the ME fans are getting fucked by EA?

This is the greatest story since Mr Garrison wrote his romance novel "In The Vally of Penises" xD.

Draxyle:

OniaPL:
Now what exactly is the name of this "song from FFIX" so I can go download it?

"Loss of Me".

Definitely one of the best tracks in that game.

Thank you, kind sir. Have a polar bear as a small gesture of my gratitude.

image

I'm impressed by Jim's ability to paint a picture with his words more then anything else. That took some writing talent.

Wow that was complete asinine garbage. I got about 4 minutes in before I realized the video was still playing in the background and shut it off. Penis penis throbbing penis. I get how that might be funny if it didn't remind me so clearly of waiting in line at the DMV.

Rowan93:

Kojiro ftt:
I can't believe I am saying this, but Jim Sterling just wasted 8 minutes of my life.

That's what she said.

Have to agree with you both on that.

GonzoGamer:
I'm not exactly an expert on erotica but don't give up your day job Jim...this didn't get me excited at all.

or is it a parable on how all the ME fans are getting fucked by EA?

Its actually abit of satire on a bunch of homophobes from who declared that allowing gay romance options in Mass Effect 3 would 'ruin the game for them' and they declared Shepard couldn't possibly be gay, no matter what.

The fact that very few people seem to know that this is what its about shows that Jim messed this one up and should have just done a normal video.

There was not a more brilliant way to respond to the ridiculous fan rage about the gay maleShep options. Well done, Jim.

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