Zero Punctuation: Kid Icarus: Uprising

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Kid Icarus: Uprising

Kid Icarus plays it fast and loose with Greek mythology.

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Saw this coming, but mostly because every other reviewer on the planet, and some beyond it, have called it the worst implementation of 3DS controls ever.

And we know you're not biased against Nintendo. You hate everything equally.

Pointless periperal...how about instead of making a stupid stand, just make the controls workable. Come on Nintendo, you're (sometimes) better than this.

I was kind of hoping for I Am Alive. Mostly because I just went ahead and assumed that Kid Icarus was going to be shit.

I really enjoyed this game despite the pain caused by the controls.
I am not a Nintendo sheep or twat but I liked the gameplay and voice acting.
NOT BIASED!

Also, in case it matters, YES WHEDON FAN!
I caught that Buffy bit.

Poor Yahtzee, he's lost the use of his hands from that game so now he can't shoot anyone the bird.

Also, must be a huge epidemic of people losing their tits in Australia, hopefully they can duct tape them back on.

i cant eve watch the video because of this boring space janitor thing .itsimply wont let me .

Medusa is really fappable now though.

I liked this game a lot. It incentivizes replaying levels on a harder difficulty for more unlocks. It's too bad the controls were the worst thing in a really really long time. It supports the Circlepad Pro accessory which severely enhances the already great Resident Evil game on the system, but they utilize it in the dumbest possible way. For instance, you cannon use the right thumb pad to move the reticle... nope. They made it so left handed people can use the horrendous control scheme. I have given Nintendo a lot of patience over the years. I do not hold their shortcomings against the positive things. Sure Zelda is the not vastly different in play style from previous iterations, but they are great games and every game is layed out completely different from the last with all new secrets to find. But this whole "you must play the game how we want" is fucking stupid. I mean, I'm afraid of the WiiU because it may want me to play every single game in the most uncomfortable way possible. Stop being stupid Nintendo. And you may yet have a future.

I thought it was pretty good. The controls were horrible though.

Methinks he protests too much if he has to spend the first minute of the video saying "i'm not anti nintendo".

Also heres a suggestion , if people don't like the controls why not CHANGE THEM.

Its right there, in the options, if you bothered to look.

Oh thats right that would require reviewers to actually point out this fact rather than ignore it or read a manual.

Anything that sounds like Buffy is a plus in my book.
To bad the rack counters this plus.

"spines like the last banana on the shelf"
Why, yes, i did laugh out loud. Verily.

I've heard/watched others complaining about the wonky controls as well.

What's the purpose of a handheld console if you have to use a stand for it to be able to play properly without getting finger cramps.Really bad choice there Nintendo.

Balkan:
i cant eve watch the video because of this boring space janitor thing .itsimply wont let me .

Yeah, had to refresh like three times. WTF.

Anyway, (obligatory Yahtzee is TEH BIAS comment here).

Milky1985:
Methinks he protests too much if he has to spend the first minute of the video saying "i'm not anti nintendo".

Also heres a suggestion , if people don't like the controls why not CHANGE THEM.

Its right there, in the options, if you bothered to look.

Oh thats right that would require reviewers to actually point out this fact rather than ignore it or read a manual.

Yeah cause its really good game design for people to have to change the control scheme because the default controls are shit

Was thinking about getting this, until I saw the huge onslaught declaring the controls to be the worst thing since E.T. for the Atari.

I'll give it a shot eventually... just after it comes down in price.

Man, it's looking more and more like the only reason I bought a 3ds was to play Ocarina of Time and Pokemon. :/

Go look up weather Greek mythology had Angels in it...

lol

Good episode, I wasn't raised by Nintendo either.

Poorly Designed interface with a shameless money pit and living off faded glory? Sounds pretty Greek to me!

Er, Yahtzee, why are you trying to reason with the fanboys? The only "logic" they will listen to is you blindly sprouting praise of Nintendo and they will undertake any logical contortions necessary to prove that YOU ARE TEH HATE BIASZZZ!!OMG!!"POIJFPDOJ:NALK!!!

I would like to point out that every button and control is customizable, to the point of you being able to play without involving the touch screen at all, if you're crazy.

If you don't like the default, CHANGE IT.

Hell, there is specifically an option for automatically shooting when you've got the targeting scope on the enemy, exactly what Yahtzee said it should have!

And that's only if you can't wrap your head around the default controls. I haven't changed anything except the placement of the "activate special power" button, and I just use the touch screen for that anyway. And I'm perfectly comfortable playing the thing while walking around or lying down on the bed. So there's that, before the "well, if you have to customize it" argument gets thrown around.

And I don't think a two-decade gap is "restraint", it's more like the property going completely dead. Of course, we have learned that most any sequel is too soon 'round these parts.

I was afraid of this. Why did I let my curiosity get the better of me and break my "no Nintendo related reviews" policy w/ Yahtzee and watch this simply because it's one of the best games Nintendo released this year. Okay I'm gonna do this commetary style and go over every single problem I find with Yahtzee's shallow bullcrap. But just prove I'm not heartless, I'll list his good points as well.

Problems:

problem 1. Stop judging the 3DS on the 3D alone. Some of us know the thing is a gimmick but bought it for other reasons. That and Uprising's 3D is actually good.

problem 2. Wow. Way to over-exaggerate the controls there. I rarely get cramps from the game. I have more problems with it being to easy to dash and accidentally falling off narrow platforms, not something as simple as aiming. And I don't even use the stand. Also, you complaining about how you like to lay on a couch and play DS? OK 1, that's your petty problem, not Nintendo's and 2, even I can't do that.

problem 3. So, you're complaining about a game having too much stuff to do now? That's the kind of ungrateful behavior that makes me hate the fighting game community.

problem 4. Visuals too busy to look at? Dude, I don't have the best attention span and even I don't have this problem in all but 3 levels. Perhaps you need too stop drinking all the beer at that pretentious bar of yours.

good point 1. Yeah the dialog is pretty corny at points. But I've heard worse.

good point 2. See now the dashing over the edge thing? That's a legit complaint.

Really not as downright hateful as I thought it would be but still, I love how you claim you aren't biased against Nintendo, just willing to point out the company's flaws even though almost all the time you point out said flaws its nothing more than trivial bitch fitting and/or bullcrap, Yahtzee.

EDIT: double post. To be fair, your servers caused it.

Lordofthesuplex:

getoffmycloud:

Yeah cause its really good game design for people to have to change the control scheme because the default controls are shit

To complain about something that trivial shows how lazy, petty, ignorant and downright ungrateful today's gamers have become to me. Thanks for reminding me that, assclown.

Yes! We're so lazy and etitled for demanding that developers do their job and get game design right! God, we're soooo damn naggy and entitled! We should just give them our money and stop being so judgy about what they give us! God!

Sh, Yahtzee, don't mention Bleak Expectations.
It's my go-to-series for showing off how totally non-mainstream I am for enjoying British comedy that's not even on tv. How am I supposed to do that if people have heard of it?
As for the game, as much as Hades that sounds like Mr. Gently Benevolent sounds like fun, this is not the game that will make me finally buy a 3DS. I still have a lot of DS games I haven't played, and I can play those on the bus.

trollpwner:

Lordofthesuplex:

getoffmycloud:

Yeah cause its really good game design for people to have to change the control scheme because the default controls are shit

To complain about something that trivial shows how lazy, petty, ignorant and downright ungrateful today's gamers have become to me. Thanks for reminding me that, assclown.

Yes! We're so lazy and etitled for demanding that developers do their job and get game design right! God, we're soooo damn naggy and entitled! We should just give them our money and stop being so judgy about what they give us! God!

Literally every single button is customizable. If you're one of those people who can't deal with the default (and if you are, I apologize for not being able to identify with that, since I can handle the default controls just fine), then you can make the controls anything you want.

And because the default control isn't the one you're comfortable with, the developers are lazy and didn't do their job right? Everyone is going to have different opinions as to which control scheme works best for them, so forgive me if I don't believe that there's a perfect control scheme that they should have made the default.

The only reason I stopped playing this was because I picked up Tales of the Abyss and fell in love with it; I don't hate KI:U, I just found it difficult to get into.

I've tried to watch this video 10 damn times and the stupid space janitor wrap around thing is making it impossible for the video to load.

Lordofthesuplex:
snip.

But nice things AREN'T SHIT DEFAULT CONTROLS!

Adjustable controls my ass. If they are too incompetent to make a good control scheme to begin with why should I bother to spend money on this game?

Enlong:
snip

Yes. Shit controls = developers are lazy. So. Fucking. Simple. Making them adjustable is just another shit excuse to not put any thought and time into controls to begin with.

Lordofthesuplex:

Yes! Yes you are! It took me barely a minute to adjust the controls to my liking, what's your fucking problem then?

And they are doing their job, what might be good controls to one person may be shit to someone else.

Seriously I'm fed up with twats like you that share Yahtzee's elitist mentality and I'm not going to be nice about it anymore since it's why we can't have nice things apparently. Come up with a more legit complaint or shut your fucking mouth.

WAAAA!!! WAAAA!!! People agree with someone I don't! WAAAA!!

Sorry, slipped for a second there.

There's no excuse for having moving controls that throw you off a cliff this badly or for developers creating an original control scheme that is impossible to use. Stop being silly.

Enlong:

Literally every single button is customizable. If you're one of those people who can't deal with the default (and if you are, I apologize for not being able to identify with that, since I can handle the default controls just fine), then you can make the controls anything you want.

And because the default control isn't the one you're comfortable with, the developers are lazy and didn't do their job right? Everyone is going to have different opinions as to which control scheme works best for them, so forgive me if I don't believe that there's a perfect control scheme that they should have made the default.

Same for you. There's no excuse for us having to faff around because they couldn't make their original control scheme usable.

You can insist that "it's totally good if you change it" all you want, but the original control scheme is how the developers intended people to play, which doesn't paint too good a picture of them, no?

I still don't understand what people are going on about when they whine about the controls, though.
Just from my experience, I can stand up straight whilst walking and I can play the game easily. Left thumb on the circley-thingy, left index finger on the trigger, right hand holding the stylus.
How come this is so difficult for everyone?

daxterx2005:
I've tried to watch this video 10 damn times and the stupid space janitor wrap around thing is making it impossible for the video to load.

Had the same problem but i kept trying and it eventually worked not much of a solution i know.

Disregard this post, it was a duplication of my last one, laggy internet may have caused a double post?

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